New QOTW vote

Fat wives
Got a chubster? Does she cost you a fortune in pies, pasta and doughnuts? Tell all.


Dating sites in Australia
Got any action from setting up a profile? Did you get to see your wife spit roasted while you sat in the corner clutching your small limp penis?


Toys in intimate places
Ever shoved a piece of Lego up a skanky girl’s vagina? We want to know.


Ignore 2.0
What’s the fucking point? Note; responses to this question will be ignored.


New QOTW vote









Vote closes later today

Probably when this post gets deleted by a real mod and I get put on the naughty step.


(Legless is a prick., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:18, 203 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Best QOTW vote EVAR!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:19, Reply)

Tee hee
You'll be fine til about 4pm, it's the annual 'real mod' away-day beano to Battersea Dogs' Home, b3th's been left with the keys and she won't be up until Midsomer Murders starts on ITV3 at 3:45.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:26, Reply)

It's neck and neck.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:29, Reply)

It's a real nailbiter and that's for sure.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:31, Reply)

That fat wives are streaking ahead.
*shudders*
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:32, Reply)

*drops trews*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:41, Reply)

It's falling back now.
Thankfully.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:41, Reply)

*does up trews dejectedly*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:42, Reply)

I want Ignore 2.0 to win.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:34, Reply)

conflict of interest, what?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:37, Reply)

I assume that "MOD" will do what Scaryduck seems to do and put through the question he wants to win.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:44, Reply)

'Sexy kids. Got any pictures of sexy kids? Post them here'
That one always seems to win.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:47, Reply)

Always.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:48, Reply)

You're so edgy.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:34, Reply)

Come on, this is good.
You're only grumpy because one of the questions isn't 'WHISKY CHAT. Ever bored the internet to near-suicide with incessant and agonisingly over-detailed wittering about Scottish whiskey?'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:40, Reply)

I have never done that.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:42, Reply)

What about that time I killed myself when you were talking about whiskey?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:43, Reply)

Pssst. Call it 'whiskey', I'm trying for an aneurysm.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:44, Reply)

Everyone knows that Irish whiskey is much better than that Scotlander stuff.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:45, Reply)

My favourite is Claymore.
It's the best deep-fried Jocko shit-filth ever.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:46, Reply)

I am a Qualified Irish Whiskey Taster. Have been for 9 years.
True story.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:47, Reply)

You've done the tour at the Jameson's Distillery too?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:48, Reply)

Hahahaha. Yes.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:52, Reply)

Lusty's dad and I got a Scotch tasting class for Xmas from her mum.
Actual real true story.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:49, Reply)

Lowland malts go best with aneurysms

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:46, Reply)

That has E additives

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:02, Reply)

:o(

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:09, Reply)

I like Whiskeey

( Peej, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:39, Reply)

Yes you fucking have.

( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:28, Reply)

I believe incessant wittering is best accompanied by Islay malts
the peatiness tends to damp down the wittering.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:44, Reply)

I CALL IT 'A TEN-YEAR OLD WITTERING LADDIE'!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:44, Reply)

I like this.
MOD for top mod!
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:42, Reply)

I, for one, welcome our new MOD overlord.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:46, Reply)

Poor poor old MOD has been stepped for a week.
MODS - FREE THE 'MOD' ONE NOW!!!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:46, Reply)

I thought you didn't like Bradley Wiggins?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:47, Reply)

BELL BOY!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:52, Reply)

Hahaha.
Silly cunts.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:48, Reply)

Innit.
Harmless lighthearted fun here.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:53, Reply)

It's not like it was going to be QOTW.
THey worry about this but not about libel?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 8:58, Reply)

Kid-fingering wankers.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:01, Reply)

I'm on a mission from MOD.
The poor cunt is on a 'last chance' week's stepping over this. So we have a moribund messageboard with an ever-dwindling and increasingly unfunny post count (no offence everyone. Actually fuck it, 'offence'), we have an innocuous and jovial post for a change and they're rewarded with that. Nice one you mod-tards. Way to hasten your own demise.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:00, Reply)

Yeah, man.
Stick it to the man. Or at least, his son.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:03, Reply)

STICK IT TO YOUR NAN

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:05, Reply)

Are we still having Na'an?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:06, Reply)

I think so.
Slightly dodgy innards this morning but I should imagine so.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:08, Reply)

Couple of litres of water and a bready sandwich should sort that out.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:13, Reply)

That's my thinking.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:15, Reply)

Well you did ask where the step hammer had gone

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:04, Reply)

hahaha v good
The only problem is that now I cannot stop singing 'step hammer' over Peter Gabriel's 'Sledgehammer' AGAIN.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:08, Reply)

Thanks
Now I have that earworm too.

Gonna need a lot of Pink Panther to shift this one...
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:12, Reply)

Good.
I hope the whole place burns down.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:14, Reply)

Me too brah.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:15, Reply)

i feel a bit ropey today.
Drank rather a lot yesterday. Bleh.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:17, Reply)

Is that like a bertdown, but done in Scots poetry?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:16, Reply)

If b3th is our resident mod without powers, then who else is over here modding us?
Or has b3th been deceiving us about her lack of powers and is even now reading these words with her finger hovering over some kids the edit button?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:22, Reply)

Nah she's fast asleep and deep in Lithium dreamland about now.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:03, Reply)

what, Wilf?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:08, Reply)

Oi!

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:14, Reply)

i don't believe Democracy works.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:12, Reply)

Difficult to tell
given nowhere has it.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:25, Reply)

Double seat double seat gotta getta double seat

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:31, Reply)

Is this one of those times where what I and most of the world believe a word means,
Gives rise to pedants snorting down their noses and using the words "sne sne" and "well actually according to" and I feel like punching them in the face?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:31, Reply)

I'm afraid it is.
It's not democracy, it's copyright infringement ACTUALLY.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:32, Reply)

CopyWRONG more like.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:33, Reply)

YEAH!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:38, Reply)

Switzerland?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:31, Reply)

No, she went of her own accord.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)

of in
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:36, Reply)

No, that's chocolate

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:35, Reply)

racist

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:39, Reply)

Morning all
What's going on?
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:32, Reply)

Morning, Marvin.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:33, Reply)

I GET THIS!!!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)

I LIKE YOU BEING ON HERE, FOR THIS AND A VERY SMALL NUMBER OF OTHER REASONS!!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:37, Reply)

VALIDATION ON THE INTERNET!!!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)

Not any more
I have had porridge
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)

Hello sporty.
I'm being a grumpy shit bag today. How are you?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)

Come on doubleyoupee, let's see if we can turn that frown upside down :D

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:35, Reply)

I need to get to the pub and get a cup of tea with a splash of whiskey, and off this smelly peasant carrying bus.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:38, Reply)

I have never drunk either tea or coffee with booze in
TRUFAX
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:39, Reply)

Stunned has never drunk either tea or coffee without booze in.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:46, Reply)

without booze in
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)

Coffee with golden rum in it is nice.
Coffee with cognac in it is nice.
Coffee with amaretto in it is quite nice.

If you're putting booze in tea you are an alkie. Soz Windy.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)

When we were kids my nana used to give us coffee, made with boiled milk and a drop of whiskey, as a bedtime drink.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:52, Reply)

Good old 'the Midlands'.
:o(
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:04, Reply)

She was from Sunderland, where giving booze to kids is apparently acceptable.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

Highland malts are best in tea
less peaty
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)

whisky and whiskey tastes of arse

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)

In Scotland it's spelled 'ars'

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:47, Reply)

hahaha!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)

it'll be Bells.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Cheers Quasi

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:44, Reply)

Tired
Sportscalf decided that 4:30am was a good time to wake up
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:38, Reply)

On the plus side she went back to sleep and I watched Sherlock Holmes

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:40, Reply)

you are supposed to train him,
Try squirting him with water when he does something bad.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:41, Reply)

Battered's been stepped for a week for the above
Interesting that the post itself remains. Basically that says "We don't want you to do this sort of thing (although it is very funny)"
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:34, Reply)

i wanna know why you think you're like Cassidy.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:37, Reply)

He meant Natalie Cassidy, TV's Sonia off of Eastenders.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:38, Reply)

*trumpets*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:39, Reply)

FUCK THE FUCK OFF YOU FUCKING CUNT

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Well I can't match him for physical or drinking prowess
But I'm a bit of an irresponsible, selfish bastard although I try a lot harder than him to repress it. He was the first irresponsible, selfish bastard that came to mind.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:43, Reply)

fair shout.
it's great comic.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:48, Reply)

Fucking brilliant
I loved it from start to finish. Pissed myself.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:49, Reply)

Silly Darth, you should have taken toilet breaks.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:50, Reply)

Then I would have to have stopped reading
It's not like you can take a comic to the toilet is it
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:52, Reply)

I was lent the first one by a friend.
fell in love with it and read it all within a month. incredible.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:51, Reply)

I've had all mine through the library
but am looking into how cheaply I can get hold of them. Endlessly re-readable.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:54, Reply)

FREE BATTERED!
Darth 10p etc
( Peej, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:40, Reply)

Maybe we should have a celebrity mod
Liven up the place. Different mod each week like on Have I Got News For You. Bill Oddie for starters.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)

*puts hands all over my body*

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:42, Reply)

*golf clap*

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:45, Reply)

Bill MODDIE more like!!!

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:43, Reply)

I'll set em up...

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:43, Reply)

This^ is a Goodie

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:44, Reply)

My deputy head was called Bill Oddie
But as we all called him mister Oddie we never noticed just how AMAZINGLY FUNNY his name was.
( Peej, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:56, Reply)

Whoever is modding this forum is fucking pathetic.
I don't mean b3th, I mean the one that gets up early and steps people for satirising a satirical website.
( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:56, Reply)

And a child fiddler and a adulterer and a gay

( Peej, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 9:57, Reply)

It's the lack of consistency that I object to.
And all the dog-bumholery and kid-finglerisation.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)

Oh, there's consistency alright.
Be somebody a modwhosenameIwon'tmentionbecausepeopletendtodisappear doesn't like and get heavy-handed treatment.
( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:09, Reply)

To be fair to Scaryduck,
Battered did spend a couple of weeks following him around the internet accusing him of being an alcoholic nonce.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:15, Reply)

I was under the impression that infant children were time-consuming
I MEAN BATTERED'S KID
HE'S OBVIOUSLY GOT TOO MUCH TIME ON HIS HANDS
DON'T STEP ME I'M REALLY FUCKING BORED
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:19, Reply)

Yeah, god knows taking the piss and bullying is definitely frowned on here.

( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:29, Reply)

Here is one thing
Elsewhere on the internet is a bit harsh.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:35, Reply)

That's a pretty good reason to not like him.
Not a very good reason to use your mod powers to punish him because you don't like him.
( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:37, Reply)

Yeah I can't argue with that
Well I could, but not honestly, and this really isn't the sort of place where argumentative dishonesty is encouraged.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:38, Reply)

It's the age old problem of being identified as a troublemaker.
The naughty kid at school always received harsher treatment than everyone else.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:39, Reply)

We can hardly argue that we should be treated like adults either

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:40, Reply)

It's that age old problem of being a mouthy little shit
and then saying "what me, what did I do?" and trying to look innocent when you get stepped after basically yelling PLEASE STEP ME!!!!
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:51, Reply)

The difference being is that he didn't do that this time.
Which is what makes it unreasonable.
( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:53, Reply)

The reason he was given was 'repeated, deliberate trolling across boards with multiple accounts. Last warning'.
Now I can see that they might not like him posting this in three places on the site.
But is this really 'deliberate trolling'?
No one appears to be upset by it.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:55, Reply)

At a stretch, it's trolling the mods
but yeah, they're pushing the definition to victimise him. IMHO.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:57, Reply)

I'm not even sure putting one post on three sub boards is even spamming
particularly as on /talk he just linked to this post. I certainly wouldn't call it "repeated trolling".
( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:59, Reply)

I still reckon his crime is impersonating a mod
Well, that and being a cunt.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:01, Reply)

*sigh*
he even said in his own post he'd be stepped, he knew the risks and even seems to have expected the result. seems he was right.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:58, Reply)

He was merely being all cool and edgy or something.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:00, Reply)

Yes but was this particular post step-worthy?
Or was he anticipating he'd be stepped because the mods have got it in for him?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:01, Reply)

yeah, and they have it in for him for no reason at all?
you ask for it hard enough for long enough you get it.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:04, Reply)

No, one guy has it in for him for pretty specific reasons.
Nobody is saying that they aren't legitimate. What we are saying is that he has been modded for a post that isn't offensive, purely because he has been offensive to this particular mod in the past.

Regardless of his past behaviour, mods mod on a post by post basis, or they're supposed to.
( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:05, Reply)

*shrug*
I can only repeat: ask for it long enough, you get it.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:10, Reply)

If only this rule was observed at Platinum Lace

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:10, Reply)

He wasn't attacking scaryduck in this post.
He wasn't behaving badly in this post. He wasn't fucking asking for anything.

Disproportionate response.
( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:11, Reply)

That's a good name for a band

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:14, Reply)

if I agree with battered will you start asking for him to be banned?

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:19, Reply)

I see your point, don't get me wrong
The question is whether or not this post was really worth a stepping. It's obviously his own fault that these things are watched closely.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:06, Reply)

see below
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1820124
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:10, Reply)

I'm not saying that Battered is not a cunt.
But I don't think this was really a stepping offence.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:53, Reply)

their site, their rules
since when did it have to make sense or be logical. it was predictable enough.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:05, Reply)

I reckon Battered's got a massive target painted on his back in the eyes of the mods
According to his FB post it's a "last warning" trip to the step - be intrigued to see what they ban him for. Fifty quid says it won't be worth it.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:00, Reply)

Don't mods have targets on their backs anyway?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:05, Reply)

Oh this is very good indeed
*doffs cap*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:07, Reply)

Also - correct me if I'm being thick here - what's to stop Battered joining up with another account?

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:06, Reply)

YM

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:06, Reply)

Isn't that why he has been stepped?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:07, Reply)

Well yes, good point
I mean - and again, am unaware of the process, and shit with all forms of IT - say they delete his account, obviously he can just create another one and carry on. Or is it done by IP address or some such?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:09, Reply)

It's all done with voodoo mind control.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:10, Reply)

Yeah, I thought it'd be something like that

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:12, Reply)

IP banning is an imprecise science.
You come into a site from an IP range, your actual address as far as the site sees it is actually an address within the range your ISP uses. You remember Bou? In order to get rid of her permanently they had to block the entire IP range of South Africa because she kept getting in via a different IP.
( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:12, Reply)

They also seem to be having fun deciding what to do with Frank over on /talk.
His current incarnation is sandboxed there, but appears to be allowed to post everywhere else.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:13, Reply)

Bou was before my time but I've heard the tale
So how exactly do they propose to get rid of Battered if he misbehaves again? They delete his account, he creates a new one. Called, I dunno, Batt3red.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:18, Reply)

If they decide to IP ban him, they'll have to either have a way of tracking
which IPs each accounts have logged in from and ban those, or ban an entire range. In the latter case anyone who happens to be in that range will be unable to reach the site.

They're more likely to just ban individual accounts if they come from Battered's IP range than do an outright IP ban, at least to begin with.
( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:21, Reply)

Yeah I assumed something similar
but he's got an iPad, presumably a home laptop as well as whatever he "works" off, same as the rest of us. Although I suppose a ban on one of them, if they could manage it, would at least narrow down his options.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:24, Reply)

If he's on an iPad connecting over his home or work connections
it'd still come from the same IP range as his computer.
( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:25, Reply)

Oh yeah
Sorry, I need these things pointing out to me. I'll be happy to return the favour if you ever want to know anything about football, or very specific periods of history
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:27, Reply)

IP block would only work for a home or work address
Right now I'm on my phone using Opera Mini, which routes via servers in Sweden or somewhere which compress the data to save my 3G being used up, so what IP that comes up as is anyone's guess.
For instance, it used to let me vote hundreds of times in polls by shutting it down and opening it again, although that seems to have stopped working, pity as it made the "worst person on b3ta" poll most amusing.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:20, Reply)

I didn't know that, that's pretty interesting.

( Kroney, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:24, Reply)

I think we are all overlooking a more serious issue here.
When am I going to be allowed to get my l back?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:06, Reply)

A more pertinent question might be
didn't you see this coming when you changed your name?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:07, Reply)

I guess you missed my pathetic tale.
I did see this coming, so I used a spare account to reserve my name.
Then the suits up at City Hall banned my spare account, I assume for the crime of being a spare account.
Although apparently it is ok for just about everyone else to have a spare account.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:12, Reply)

So they banned the account you created in order to preserve your name whilst being festive
then someone else nicks said name in an act of petty twattery, and they get let off scot free.

Hang on - if the name "tangledupinblue" is ban-worthy whilst there's also a "Hark The Herald Tangles Sing" once, why not twice? Surely by that logic anyone signing up under that name should get the hammer?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:15, Reply)

Some lollard still has 'Monty Boyce' which is apprently fine.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:19, Reply)

This is exactly what I mean
SURELY nicking someone's account in order to impersonate them is worse than bagsying your own name in order to get festive?

I mean, this arsewipe could be out there right now on /Talk, besmirching your good name!

Well, you know.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:21, Reply)

it's a subtle hint that xmas names are well bent

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:21, Reply)

You can post pretty much anything you like on b3ta, but we love to see your original pictures and projects. As a general guide:
Do:
Have fun and join in with the conversations
Post pictures you have made
Post links to your new web projects
Say nice things about the pictures you like.
Don't:
Post stuff that is, or looks like porn - (see NSFW section)
Post pictures from sites that are not your own
Repost your old pictures in a new thread - that's what the 'View Older Messages' link is for.
Spam your website over and over again.
Be nasty or offensive to other boarders
Be boring
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:56, Reply)

What is out of bounds on B3ta?
A quick look at B3ta will show that no subject is forbidden when it comes to making jokes, but be prepared for misunderstandings if you are dealing with a controversial subject. It's probably best to get to know your audience before you make jokes about anything particularly sensitive.

It's best not to use your real names on any messageboard, and posting other people's real names when they'd rather they weren't known is a big no-no, and the same applies to any kind of private details.

Please go easy on the misogynistic "I would" type posts whenever a picture of an attractive lady is posted on the board. Not only can it get a bit tiresome, but it can be intimidating and unwelcoming for a lot of lady boarders. Besides, even if you would, she probably wouldn't.

Also, remember there is a difference between poor taste and being hateful. Please don't use b3ta as an outlet for racism, or your posts will be deleted and your account banned.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 10:57, Reply)

I would though.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:00, Reply)

You'd be very welcome ;)

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:01, Reply)

Even if we take the above guidelines as something of a b3ta constitution
There's a hell of a difference between what's written and what's actually enforced. There's a tacit understanding that we'll all get the piss ripped out of us for whatever sensitive personal issues we're daft enough to advertise. It's not like everyone who jokes about AA's Mum gets stepped.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:00, Reply)

No, they get the clap.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:00, Reply)

It would be helpful if Al could help illustrate this point with a picture of you with cocks drawn all over your face.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:03, Reply)

That was a classic
In the same way that Be Here Now was a classic.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 3 Jan 2013, 11:07, Reply)