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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 836, 835, 834, 833, 832, ... 1

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Looks like the honda accord man was lying
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-21519029

Also

www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-berkshire-21507158

Boy puts foot in woodchipper.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:31, 152 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
"Health and safety had since improved at the firm"
which basically means "No-one else has put their fucking foot in a fucking wood chipper"
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:35, Reply)
'Frank's fish and chip shop'
Says it all.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:37, Reply)
Service with a wonky internet smile

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:37, Reply)
And a parrot.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:14, Reply)
No, I'm not clicking on that, sorry

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:37, Reply)
Oh go on, you should.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:38, Reply)
Nah, it's probably a virus

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:38, Reply)
No honestly, it's not. I promise
I wouldn't do that.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:41, Reply)
woah nice icon
is that new?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:01, Reply)
Should have stuck his head in.
Stupid twat. I wouldn't have felt responsible. My statement would have read "The fucking idiot stuck his foot into a wood chipper. a device powerful enough to turn solid chunks of wood in to little chips of wood. in the eyes of the law I am responsible but I feel that he's the twat that stuck his foot in to a wood chipper"
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:41, Reply)
I would love it if someone did this in court.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:43, Reply)
When does personal responsibility become a factor?
I used to work at a place where someone painted a bench in the smoking shelter with a highly flammable paint. A guy sat down and sparked up. The bench went up and he suffered bad burns. It wasn't his fault and he was compensated.

Now if the guy who was actually painting the bench sat down and sparked up I would have told him he was a twat.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:48, Reply)
Hello I have a wine question.
#HOMEBREW CHAT
Do you ever store your wine in screw tops? If so can you reuse the lids, or can you just cork the wine even though it's a screw top
HOMEBREW CHAT#
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:51, Reply)
Screw caps are better because your wine doesn't go off.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:53, Reply)
But can you reuse the caps from ones you buy???

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:54, Reply)
Probably
I reckon as along you steralise them properly you should be alright.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:54, Reply)
Depends if the seal is still airtight I'm thinking.
And if the steraliser causes the caps to corrode.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:57, Reply)
Should be fine

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:02, Reply)
People drink enough wine to supply you with new wine bottles and caps if yours get old and you're not sure they're up to the job anymore.
assuming you know people
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:03, Reply)
I'm sure Stunned throws out enough empty port bottles in a week to take your entire output

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:08, Reply)
I don't know what any of this means, but thanks.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:10, Reply)
What wine?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:10, Reply)
I was thinking of giving this a go.
www.wilkinsonplus.com/home-brewing/wilko-6-bottle-wine-starter-kit-cab-sauv/invt/0318391
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:13, Reply)
Yeah I picked up some wilkos stuff £5 a kit
I wouldn't pay £20 for it though, not really worth it with the quality of the wine you get out of it.
Though I've had more luck with the white than the red.
Great for starting out though cause you get kit and it's pretty easy, but I think I'd be put off by the quality if it was my first time.
I'm going to go foraging this year (and steal fruit from the in-laws allotment) and make stuff for free :)
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:23, Reply)
The wine kit is a bonus to be honest.
I want the demijohn, and spares. I make a lot of beer, but all the equipment is too large to do wine. Well unless I do 30 bottle kits and I've not got much space to store all that.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:31, Reply)
Makes great gifts though.... then you get the joy of homebrewing as well as the joy of not having to store the stuff

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:33, Reply)
And the joy of not paying for gifts

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:48, Reply)
EXACTLY!

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:49, Reply)
Can you call your label "Chateaux on the kitchen table" ?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:10, Reply)
I saw a wine called "Chat en oeuf"

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:17, Reply)
All the time.
Yes
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:02, Reply)
don't you have a bucket or an empty milk carton you can put it in?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:18, Reply)
I agree but vicarious liability comes into play

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:52, Reply)
Last time I saw your mum, my vicarious liability came into play. If you know what I mean.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:52, Reply)
Needs Moar information,supervision, instruction and training

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:54, Reply)
This made me do an office lol
5.9.83.79/links/Were_sinking_were_sinking
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:41, Reply)
That's shit.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:44, Reply)
No it's not

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:44, Reply)
I actually agree with you, it made me laugh.
The problem with Battered is ... actually I don't have time to go into that here.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:46, Reply)
Bollocks
If you didn't have time to kill you wouldn't be here at all. Spill.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:49, Reply)
I clicked on that
Mainly because Badmons is SO nailz, that viruses are afraid of him. I heard he makes burgers out of trojan horses.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:44, Reply)
I heard he thought a rootkit was something they discussed on gardeners question time.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:47, Reply)
Well done thats worth a click

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:49, Reply)
I heard he likes 'Greek'

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:49, Reply)
Well we all like a bare gift

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 12:58, Reply)
in the mouth?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:04, Reply)
low fat yogurt?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:28, Reply)
Whipped cream?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:37, Reply)
That's several thousand shades of old.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:36, Reply)
clearly

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:45, Reply)
So why am you posting it. it's old.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:48, Reply)
Some people may not have seen it
Do you only watch movies that were produced in the current year? No, well there you go :p
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:49, Reply)
Why are you asking me questions and then answering them for me?
You don't know me!
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:51, Reply)
HE'S NOT YOUR DAD

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:52, Reply)
Someone must be.
I won't rest until I've found him!
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:52, Reply)
Have you asked Darth?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:54, Reply)
Darth who?
Malgus?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:55, Reply)
To be honest, I'm not even your real dad

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:52, Reply)
Now you're telling old jokes.
Do keep up Badmons
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:53, Reply)
fucking hell, out by seconds

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:55, Reply)
There there.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:56, Reply)
where where?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:57, Reply)
On the stair stair

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:58, Reply)
A little mouse with clogs on?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:59, Reply)
Fuckin Dutch vermin, comin' over here taking our rodents jobs

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:00, Reply)
Most of us are dutch anyway.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:02, Reply)
I'm not I'm French

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:06, Reply)
Gutted.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:08, Reply)
It's why i have such a refined palette and such sartorial wit

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:11, Reply)
I've stopped reading your posts now.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:12, Reply)
ok.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:13, Reply)
Hello.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:14, Reply)
Hai

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:15, Reply)

a
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:16, Reply)
fair enough

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:18, Reply)
Up next is Swipe with the weather
Cap'n Cavy with sports
PC on the poles
Monty on kittens
and as ever, Al with the hard hitting news of the day
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:10, Reply)
I've just woken up,
I was rather pissed last night. I might put that on qotw.

I was thinking about the horse meat thing, have McDonald's or burger king come up in it yet? They use horrible processed shite don't they?
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:12, Reply)
Burger king have
Surprisingly

Good day wooflington pig
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:13, Reply)
did they have any horse?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:14, Reply)
Yes contaminated
Which is shocking as they are about the most expensive burger chain
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:15, Reply)
I wear shoes and everything when I go in one

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:17, Reply)
POSH cunt

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:17, Reply)
crikey,
Not good that.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:20, Reply)

shocking suprising about easily

HAHhahahaha
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:24, Reply)
Think Burger King has
Not sure about McDs

Burger King also had their twitter account hacked by someone who used it to advertise McDs for the lulz.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:16, Reply)
Do keep up Loaksey

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:16, Reply)
Have you *any* idea how hard it is to type on a phone keyboard with these fat fingers?
you horrid bullying hare, you.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:19, Reply)
Sorry B3th

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:19, Reply)
Oh, you cheeky cunt

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:24, Reply)
Sorry Loaksey

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:26, Reply)
roffle

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:38, Reply)
I saw the twitter think, that was hilarious.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:19, Reply)
"£15 to a victims of crime charity" sounds like leaving a load of coppers on the table as tip at a restaraunt

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:16, Reply)
Teenager in 'no common sense' shocker.
Society in 'someone must be to blame' shocker.

Do you think his mother ever said to him "If John put his foot in a woodchipper, would you do the same?"

It's natural selection at work. When the zombies come, he'll not be able to run away fast enough.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:23, Reply)
he might have fallen off a ladder or something.
Does it say how it happened? I didn't read it.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:28, Reply)
It said the wood wasn't going through the chipper fast enough
so he stuck his foot in to tramp it down.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:29, Reply)
oh. well he's just a plain old fashioned moron.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:30, Reply)
Or as I like to call them, a sixteen year old.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:31, Reply)
Cooker sorted?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:28, Reply)
Halfway there.
And I don't want to jinx it, but so far it HAS been surprisingly easy. Exploded diagrams and clear written instructions certainly help.

Off to the tip in a minute with a car full of crap out of the kitchen, by which time the glue on the new dials should have set and we can start the fun job of trying to put the bastard back together again.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:30, Reply)
Electric wheelchairs are a fucker to fix aint they?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:32, Reply)
The main problem with them happens when Al kicks their wing mirrors off.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:44, Reply)

their wing mirrors
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:10, Reply)
I put my cock in a woodpecker's hole
The woodpecker said well bless my soul
Take it out
Take it out
Take it out
Re-move it
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:22, Reply)
I like the fact the stories are linked.
Chips being the common theme.

More newslink posters should consider this approach.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:29, Reply)
:(

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:33, Reply)
*there there*

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:34, Reply)
I had a matter where the mong operator
of a cardboard baler jumped into it and started jumping up and down to unblock it.

Lost both feet and shins.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:31, Reply)
Did you get blamed?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:34, Reply)
We had to pay some money to him.
He wasn't trained to use the machine although neither was I and I wouldn't jump in one.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:41, Reply)
but all his other sense were heightened right?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:38, Reply)
Yep he moved to South africa
And taken up running, I hear he has a model girlfriend and everything......Hey Wait a minute
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:39, Reply)
fucksocks

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:42, Reply)
You're taking the Pistorius.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:42, Reply)
Then he woke in the night and shot his missus?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:40, Reply)
Hahahahaha
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1870017
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:41, Reply)
Noo fred tiem

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:49, Reply)
I think Franks hanging out on the popular page
the posts are bouncing up and down
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:53, Reply)
ROFL
Those Kerrrrrazy Poles
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:53, Reply)
Adventurous! With this car stack wanted to penetrate the Polish truck driver to Belgium!

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:54, Reply)
That's my lift back to the hotel stuffed then.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:55, Reply)
Drink MOAR beer and drive yourself back

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:56, Reply)
on the way you can read further into The large seat Bleiber Report

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:57, Reply)
the what?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 13:59, Reply)
Like back in the old days when there was no health and safety.
I am surprised the driver wasn't inside the van at the top.
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:01, Reply)
Good old Siegfried Helmus.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:03, Reply)
I got my legs ripped off by a woodchipper once
afternoon off work, couple of paracetamol, back at work the next day, don't know why everyone makes a big fuss about it
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:03, Reply)
Just a flesh wound, right?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:04, Reply)
"Come here and I'll bite yer legs off! "

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:08, Reply)
What's it like being sandboxed Frank? Do you miss /talk?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:04, Reply)
This was the answer I got
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1866182
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:07, Reply)
it's ok actually, some people can see my posts there

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:07, Reply)
So mods then.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:09, Reply)
they always reply to me there
I suspect they think I'm about to start a threadrush, I've been warned not to do that as it would push everyone else's posts off /talk and leave a blank page

so I'll just not do that ever
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:11, Reply)
Is the sandbox permanent or just until they think you've learned your lesson?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:13, Reply)
How does the sandbox work?

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:13, Reply)
A way of keeping people away from certain parts of the site.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:14, Reply)
it basically pushes the shit around
Franks alright though
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:15, Reply)
What a wanky style of doing things
Just naughty step for a short time and be done with it, they all miss Frank on /talk
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:16, Reply)
We don't.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:17, Reply)
IN DENILE?????

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:18, Reply)
alright Mono

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:18, Reply)
Hey Frank.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:30, Reply)

b3ta.com/calendar/event/24796
(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:14, Reply)
2017, lol

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:16, Reply)
I had to write a Greasemonkey script to add the extra years into the dropdown box before I could post that

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:17, Reply)
hahaha, do it frank you know you want to

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:13, Reply)
It'll be the most exciting thing to happen to /talk in years.

(, Wed 20 Feb 2013, 14:16, Reply)

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