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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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so a new mexican restaurant opens in our square today
what's the best thing to put in a burrito?

alt: stunned has a new nickname from the last SECRETBASH: "dirty daddy donkey". what hilariously alliterative nickname would you give a b3tard?

altalt: do you use any hair products? or are they for benders and women?
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:35, 105 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
you guys at the secretbashes have all the fun

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:36, Reply)
the next one's on 7 may
you can totally come
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:37, Reply)
yeah good way to ruin the air of mystery, yeshh

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:39, Reply)
all are welcome
well, almost all.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:45, Reply)
Poor Al :(

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:48, Reply)
EVEN AL ????

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:48, Reply)
SOMETHING SOMETHING AL?

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
i don't mind al coming
it's that ghastly pseudo-french beast that i can't bear
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:58, Reply)
ALDREW MARR????

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:03, Reply)
Failing that Rory, come out for drinks on the 10th May.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:42, Reply)
sozzers in sicily or southampton then I think. I know you'll all be well gutted

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:47, Reply)
sicily OR southampton?
yeah i can see how you'd get those confused.

it's like you don't even put any effort into your lies any more.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:48, Reply)
dunno they're both down for May I just can't remember when SOZZERS

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
mrs rory cracking the whip, is she?

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:56, Reply)
SHUT UP

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:00, Reply)
i never thought of you as someone who'd end up under the thumb

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:01, Reply)
There's going to be a great secretbashbbq at my new house.
Nakers is bringing ribs. Swipe seems to think she's going to come despite vegetables being verboten.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:41, Reply)
swipe is not a vegetable

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:44, Reply)
Matter of opinion, that.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:45, Reply)
imma piss on your bbq

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:46, Reply)
hmmmm crispy flap rind

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:48, Reply)
Finger food for when we're waiting for your ribs

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:49, Reply)
how will will tell if her pubes catch fire
what with them bein ginger and all?
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
i don't have any
so there
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:57, Reply)
I'll have to look out for you round the Hill man

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:46, Reply)
I love that nickname.
Barbacoa - and then EVERYTHING that is either sauce or salad.

Altalt: wax because a I fluffy hair.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:37, Reply)
fluffy hair fives
mine is also gook straight
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:42, Reply)
burritos should be stuffed with beans, jalapenos, cheese and sour cream
nothing else

hahahahaha please leave it fluffy for the next lolbash. i would love to see you with a pube head.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:44, Reply)
i always imagined stunner to have a long flowing mane
like a shorter more golden version of JLC
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:45, Reply)
no
he is a dead ringer for stephen fry
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:46, Reply)
effeminate, broken nosed gay?

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:48, Reply)

gay lech
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:49, Reply)
Pulled Pork, Gwakamoli, Jellipinos (only a few), salsa, crunchy tacos.
I made a sandwich last night for dinner that contained

- A whole loaf of bread (Petite Letvian)
- A whole rack of ribs, smothered in BBQ sauce, chopped up pepperdew pepers, sundried toms, and tons of BBQ sauce. I took them off the bone after cooking, 'cus it would be crap in a sandwich, using spoons.
- loads of melted cheese (emmingtile and motz)
- coalslaw
- pickled red cabbage
- fries

It took me about 4 hours to eat just half of it, and it was amazing. I'm gonna go for round 2 for lunch.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:40, Reply)
I cannot believe for a second that you may be overweight

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:41, Reply)
It's practally a daily occorence for me, eating that.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:42, Reply)
worst. jew. ever.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:45, Reply)
Hitler was the worst jew ever

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:45, Reply)
worse than gonz?
no wai
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:46, Reply)
I'm far from the jewist, i'm barely a jew, infact, i'm more jewish.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:48, Reply)
not gonna lie, this is a solid joke

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 14:58, Reply)
ohmygod i had a pulled pork and jellipino sandwich yesterday it was amaaaaazing

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 14:57, Reply)
meat clearly
altalt: I'm a Dapper Dan man!
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:40, Reply)
My hair stuff is always found in the girls' section.
Last time I bought some it actually had a picture of a girl on the lid. I might write to Boots head office to complain.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:42, Reply)
i never settle and constantly experiment, so never really know what I'm doing

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:43, Reply)
I've been using it for years and it's the only thing that's ever done what I want it to do.
But they seem to be marketing it more and more towards women :(
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:44, Reply)
what is it then?

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:45, Reply)
Shockwaves matte clay.
Sounds well bent, but it's really, really good.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:46, Reply)
i used that when my hair was shorter, never seen it in the woman's section
my barbour used hairspray on me last time I went O_o
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:47, Reply)
This is the manliest conversation ever.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:48, Reply)
tell everyone how you use hair straightners
No point denying it, swipe gazzed me the gossip
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:52, Reply)
Get this, right?
OG uses hair straighteners. They turn themselves off automatically after fifteen minutes. She has never, ever failed to switch them off manually and then turn the plug off whenever I have been there to witness it.

Every time, without fail, we'll get outside the door and halfway down the stairs before she spins around and runs back up to check she's turned them off.

*seinfeld*
*seinfeld shrugging*
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:55, Reply)
girls are stoopid
it's cos all the blood goers to their tits and not their brains, FACT
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:56, Reply)
That'll be why swipe's so dim, then

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:58, Reply)
pandertron

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:59, Reply)
you wish

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:02, Reply)
DAMN THOSE WAXED JACKETS

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:50, Reply)
english needs less words pronounced the same

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
Fewer isn't pronounced the same as less.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:53, Reply)
have I rather undermined my argument here?

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:53, Reply)
Words as a group, acceptable usage etc etc

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:56, Reply)
mousse

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:46, Reply)
Oh, you're not that bad.
Almost alright under flattering lighting.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:11, Reply)
Cheese. Lots of cheese
Alt: Mongo.

Altalt: Benders and women. I either have hair, or don't. I have had shoulder-length hair, I now have a Grade 1 that grows out to about a Grade 4 before being shorn again. The only exception is 1950s greased-style hair. All else is an abomination.

Oh god I seem to have got involved and developed an opinion on hair. Kill me now.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:43, Reply)
wow you must have a real microphone head just before getting it cut

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:46, Reply)
one of us one of us one of us

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:46, Reply)
I've only ever had one and it was in Scotland so it was probably not right
Just stick a big log of meat in there, I'll be happy
BUMSEXLOLS

altalt: I like using the curly hair conditioner from herbal essences cos it smells of fruit and I feel like a big trifle when I'm using it
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:47, Reply)
Small donkeys.
Alt: I wouldn't - nicknames are for benders and hockey pricks.

Altalt: I wash my hair, is that what you mean?
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:51, Reply)
Rubbing quinoa and alfafa into your stinking bonce does not qualify as washing, soz

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:07, Reply)
It's natural!

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:13, Reply)
So's yoghurt, but you still shouldn't use it as a deodorant you yurt prick.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:15, Reply)
Don't be silly
That's for conditioning your hair.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:15, Reply)
Yeah and patchouli oil is a kind of lube

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:18, Reply)
My chilli.
Next time I'm in London there's this chilli shop just off Portobello Road that I'm going to visit. I want to try some nagas in my chilli instead of scotch bonnets.

alt: Er, dunno. Agnostic Antichrist's Alright Adespite Abeing Aliverpool Afan

altalt: I use hair clippers sometimes, they're a product designed for use on hair. I usually let my hair grow to a length that coincides with me running out of hairgel/mousse/wax. That's where the clippers come in.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:53, Reply)
I don't get the point of being all like "I WILL HAVE THE HOTTEST CHILI EVER IN THE WORLD".
I get that chilis give endorphines and they taste different, but using nagas would be like using pure casapian.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:57, Reply)
I threw half a naga into a chili the other week and nowt happened
I was expecting it to burn like crazy but nothing
I think I might've left most of it on the chopping board by accident
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:11, Reply)
I made a 2-portion dal last night with a whole fuckoff great scotch bonnet
and that was quite hot enough thank you very much.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:14, Reply)
I'm not like 'woah man fill me with your hot chili spunk juice' but I do like a bit of heat, just enough to burble away in a nice spicy fashion

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:21, Reply)
Me too man, me too.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:23, Reply)
It's not about having the hottest ever
It's about how you use the heat from the chillis to compliment the flavour of the chilli. I love using scotch bonnets, if we ever run out and just use chilli powder or flakes you notice the difference in flavour. One of our local Indian restaurants has been using the naga for a while now in a couple of dishes and they are very tasty. I'll look into best practices for using them beforehand if I get some.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:21, Reply)
We got some chili flakes with pepper and salt in a grinder thing and it's the best, goes on everything, just a little bit of spice, it's well good
I'd say it gets my seal of approval but I can't be arsed gerrin the picture again
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:25, Reply)
I get chilli salt from an Asian supermarket, it's less than a quid and it ROCKS

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:31, Reply)
Aw man I should do that, we have loads of asian shops round here that I've not been into yet

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:32, Reply)
It's great. Used in place of normal salt on things like fried eggs etc it's great.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:35, Reply)
what kind of sick fuck salts a fried egg, though?

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:53, Reply)
you are the only one who did the nickname
here, have some internet validation
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 11:58, Reply)
Best of all the meaningless validations

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:22, Reply)
breakfast burritos are fucking disgusting.
I like that smoky pork they do, it's nom.

Alt: Spent Spastic

Altalt: Yes. Too many to mention on here for fear of reprisals.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:06, Reply)
Barbacoa.
See my post above.

We dream the same dreams, we want the same things.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:15, Reply)
Whooa-oo-ahh

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:16, Reply)
I'd still have a go on Carlisle, even though her face has gone wrong now.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:17, Reply)
I bet she's a right go-goer GEDDIT???????

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:17, Reply)
I'm Schocked!!!!!!

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:19, Reply)
THIS IS ANOTHER JOKE ABOUT A MEMBER OF ALL-GIRL PUNK/POP GROUP THE GOGOS!!!!

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:20, Reply)
NICE WORK!!!!!!

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:22, Reply)
Good team effort all round

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:24, Reply)
I'm feeling pretty good about myself now, I don't know about you

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:29, Reply)
I just had a bit of a swagger around the building.
I could sense that all the females in the building were looking at me differently, y'know?
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:37, Reply)
I'd smash it until it was fucking dead.
I mean nothing left. Nada. Decimated beyond recognition. I'm talking dental records here.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:18, Reply)
You'd have to be careful smoking afterwards though.
Her face would go up like that fucking Texan chemical factory.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:22, Reply)
*googles*
really? She was fit 25 years ago, but she's not getting on my over-fifties list.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:22, Reply)
The younger her.
She'd get it now to pay her back for blanking me 25 years ago.
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:25, Reply)
I've never been to Cumbria

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:23, Reply)
I've never been to me.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:29, Reply)
Probably not worth it now - it's past its best now.

(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:38, Reply)
Meat, obviously
altalt, yes, lots
(, Thu 25 Apr 2013, 12:09, Reply)

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