Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Fucking hell you're shit at this Internet lark.Nakers is away. So no bent spastic. Celebrate this with an AMA thread where you can ask anyone the question you'd like.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:07,
371 replies,
latest was 7 years ago)
I have some radishes and a bananaWhich should I eat first? I'm thinking radishes, then use the banana to counter-act the bitterness of the radish.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:12,
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Actually, I've now eaten too much radishAlso known as 'Fraggling'
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:32,
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who the fuck eats radishes?(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:45,
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hahahahahahaha as if you are real(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:54,
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Do you mind that I'm knobbing your wife at the mo?(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:13,
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Lusty would have your balls if you tried that.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:21,
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She likes to stand behind him and cup them as he frantically roots your wife(
Bazongaloid, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:22,
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I'll have a pint of mind bleach please.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:24,
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Oh man, I didn't realise you were here.I feel terrible now.
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Bazongaloid, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:33,
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And you wonder why some people call you a cunt...(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:35,
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Actually I've been meaning to ask about thatapparently it's turned into a bit of a meme and I'm really not sure why.
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Bazongaloid, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:39,
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I'm sure it's just a case of mistaken identity or summat.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:41,
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It's probably because you're a massive cunt, Al.(
Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:41,
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Hang on a second, are you suggesting that people actually think that I'm a cunt?Why would they think I'm a cunt, but not you?
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Bazongaloid, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:48,
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Everyone knows AB is a cunt, thoughit's like the sun coming up every morning, or breathing. It would be unnecessary to point it out.
People might need clarification with you.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:03,
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There's people out there who don't know that Al is a cunt?(
Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:23,
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I dunno mate. I really don't.I'm just offering him a crumb of hope.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:32,
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Not guilty.I think it may have been AB.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:41,
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a quick search of the term suggests it goes back at least two years.(
Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:03,
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That was five minutes agoI don't feel terrible any more. Though I do seem to have indigestion.
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Bazongaloid, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:40,
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Quite rightHe has no business sharing with the internet what you, Monty and Battered's ex get up to in private.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:42,
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I'm clicking this for the use of the word 'roots'(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:31,
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I'm just waiting for Matt Bianco to annouce their arrival.Then I'll ask my question.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:14,
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I saw them about 5 years ago. Impressive stage display, pyrotechnics etc.Biffy Cyro were the support & much better than Muse.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:26,
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Fucks sake it's always MUSIC CHAT with you two(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:27,
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I heard you went along but saw an old man playing a comb and a piece of paper outside the venueand stood watching him for 3 hours.
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Bazongaloid, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:27,
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That guy was the best comb and paper player I've ever seen.And I've seen a fair few in my time.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:28,
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LiesYou've not seen a fucking comb in years, pal
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:31,
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It's true that I don't brush or comb my hair ever.Getting my first haircut of the year next week.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:32,
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Dizzie Rascal was supporting, he did his song about london and the manchester crowd booed, he laughed and said "ooh fuck off" it made me lol.
Muse Pyrotechnics were the best I've seen, light show was only beaten by a Prodigy gig I saw a few years back.
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:28, Reply)
Don't worry, BatteredSomebody loves you
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:26,
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What I don't get, God sent down his only son to die on the cross for our sins.WHAT KIND OF FUCKING FATHER WOULD DO THAT TO THEIR CHILD ?!?!?!?!
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:56,
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How fucking nice is Mexicana cheese?(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:30,
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Yeah, it's pretty goodI had some spicky popcorn the other day. That was weird.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:33,
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Spicky?I had popcorn in the states once that they'd poured hot melted butter on. Vile.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:34,
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Soz, I meant spicy. Like wasabi or something.I actually quite like melted butter on my popcorn. And sugar of course. I keep trying to make a decent butterkist-style glaze, but I can't quite get it right.
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Two Hats 🎩🎩, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:36,
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No supprises here but I'm a fan of butter on the popcorn too.My favorite are the cheese ones from joeandsephs.co.uk
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:48,
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Butter on popcorn is lovely(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:37,
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I'm seeing Eddie Izzard tonightI'm hoping it will be good, I'm not paying for it so I may as well go.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:35,
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At least I'm getting a shag without threatening someone with an axe(
Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:37,
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It's probably a Cornish tribute act.Eddie Lizard (Point).
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:36,
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So what does everyone think about the protests in Turkey?Major shift geopolitically or just a bit of hoo hah.
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:37, Reply)
I'm just pissed off at those twats using pictures of the 2012 Marathon as evidence of the protestsand when you call them out on it they say things like "don't be so closed minded" or "Its the message that counts" fucking hypocrites. Mind you I've managed to trim another few twats from my facebook friends so hey ho.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:39,
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I don't know what you're talking about?Not been on facebook today, I'm ok with that.
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:46, Reply)
People are using pictures of the 2012 marathon to show how many protestors are showing up.And when you say "That not a picture of the protestors you lying cunt" they get all upset and start saying all that wake up sheeple crap.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:49,
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Oh right, well as annoying as that is, you can't really expect everyone to check their sources when posting stuff to facebook/twitter.(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:52, Reply)
No but when a facebook group called "Truth University" posts it and hundreds of people tell them its not a picture of the protestsThey should take it down or replace it. Instead they are just saying "Its the message thats important, don't be closed minded" and thousands of people are sharing it. If it was the government using false descriptions on unrelated pictures these tin foil hatted twats would be up in arms.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:55,
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yes you absolutely fucking can.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:10,
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I think that would be immensely helpfulAnd would avoid having to wade through the same bollocks spam every 2 minutes.
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:34, Reply)
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1981640
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:41,
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Since the newspapers don't consider it important enough to reportI'm sure it's nothing but a bunch of greasy kebab shop owners having a bit of a shout.
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Bazongaloid, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:42,
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Is that what you're reduced to now you can't access the BBC at work?(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:46,
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I really like google news.Takes a while to sort out your preferences and for it to learn what stories you want to ignore but it's good.
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:47, Reply)
God, what's their problem? - They've got democracy, what more do they want?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:43,
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And when do they want it?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:44,
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b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1981610
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:45,
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I'd like to ask the entire board, How are you really feeling?
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 3 Jun 2013, 13:59,
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Very well thank you. Spent the morning with micro; song class then library then park.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:00,
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'Too drunk to fuck' by The Dead Kennedys(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:05,
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Empty and hollowbut then I have just had a poo.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:05,
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Bit pissed off, since you ask.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:06,
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When its your daughter's 17th birthday, what advice would you give her on drugs and booze?If she's going to experment around, which I think most teens do, heck, weed might be decriminalised by then... what would you prefer? Going out clubbing? At home with friends with you downstairs so you can step-in if needed? Or complete ban on all of that sort of things and risk her going behind your back?
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:05,
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As she's only 21 months old I haven't yet given it any thought.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:06,
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You should.Gonz needs to know when to start peddling his pills.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:07,
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Man, terrible parentingI'd thought of every single plan I was going to have in in response to Gonz's questions about my daughter's life before she was even a week old.
They are all "no, you can't meet her when she's 16"
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:07,
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Hey Badger you know science thingsWhy is Fracking supposed to be bad?
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:09,
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because there are risks of destabilising the ground along pre-existing fracture linesor shit underground might explode. These two things then might result in land collapse, earthquakes, tsunami and the zombie apocaylpse.
Or, y'know, fuck all might happen except we get shed loads of cheap gas. Who knows?
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:12,
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If we get cheap gas then there's less incentive to actually look at sustainable energy and we'll pump a shit tonne of carbon up that we didn't technically need.(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:14, Reply)
yes.you do understand that's how it works?
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:16,
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Devils advocate really.Fossile fuels are "bad" and shouldn't be used.
That said natural gas is the best of a bad bunch in terms of processing and carbon emissions. If the world swithched over all coal power plants to natural gas, and/or natural gas starts widespread use in HGVs buses etc global carbon emmisions will go down a lot.
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:28, Reply)
Or, alternatively people could stop obsessing about carbon dioxide emissionsas it's almost certainly one of the least of our concerns in terms of fossil fuel usage.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:30,
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I'd admit the debate should be moved more to wastefulness and energy security*but carbon emmisions is still important.
*by that I mean spending massive amounts of money every year for something that you can generally make yourself with a large enough initial investment rather than OMG fundin terror
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:35, Reply)
energy is entirely the least of our problems.There is pretty much not a single product out there in our lives that doesn't use oil in its manufacture, and to which there are no serious viable alternatives at a global scale. Biodiesel-based avaiation fuels are fuck all use if we have to go back to planes made out of wood.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:38,
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Like fuck it will.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:39,
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But flexible screeennnsss!!!!Although, I read this and was like "wooahhh" arxiv.org/ftp/arxiv/papers/1112/1112.3488.pdf
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:43, Reply)
So basically fuck it, the protestors are once again hippies with no actual knowledge on the subject?(
Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:16,
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haha, not at allNo-one really knows, everyone has an agenda, it's almost certainly not as dangerous as the hippies suggest nor is it as safe as BP etc suggest.
Actually the most important point is probably Chompy's. But for fuck's sake don't let him know.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:20,
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Gotcha!In other news I bought a new (old) bike frame. You won't approve because its a road frame but I thought i'd tell you anyway.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:22,
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I've been thinking about getting a road bike for the commute to work. I'm fucking sick of swapping tyres over. It's either turn my current XC bike into a commuter and buy another MTB (approx cost £2K) or buy a road bike (approx cost £500)
But don't tell anyone. They'll think I've turned gay.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:24,
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Well I'm doing a build myself using a mix of brand new and secondhand partsComing in at just over £250. I prefer doing that as I get brand new wheels and tyres etc but as long as the frame and forks are in good condition I don't really care about how new they are. The frame, bars,
and seat post are second hand but the wheels, brakes, cranks, pedals and chain etc are brand new. This is the frame www.b3tards.com/u/98480917b02b1414508e/frame.jpg which as you can see looks in damn good nick and cost me 102 quid
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:31,
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THE GASSES THE GASSES IN THE WATER>!>!!!even though methane is perfectly natural and will be in most water anyway.
/there is a slight issue with the chems drillers use in the water forced down the well. That's more to do with them saying it's patented and won't tell people what it is rather than any evidence that it's bad.
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:13, Reply)
Micro will be at boarding school until 18.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:09,
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Like rachelswipeShe should be fine then.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:11,
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Christ I hadn't thought of that.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:16,
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I haven't ever been out with a boarding school girlwho wasn't dirtier than a Cornish tin miner's sock and in possession of a whole heap of abandoment/daddy issues.
Just sayin.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:18,
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*googles local boarding schools*(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:25,
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What a coincidencebecause I haven't ever been out with a boarding school girl
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:25,
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you poor, poor man.I mean, it's no basis for a lasting relationship, usually, because they're madder than a whole sack of cut snakes. But, they usually go like a belt sander, so that keeps you entertained for a while.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:29,
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I did date a few girls in Uni who had gone to Private all girls schools and they were fucking filthy. The first time I shagged this girl called Sally she reached in to her handbag pulled out a tube of KY Jelly, passed it back and said "fuck me in the ass" She actually carried it around with her in case to opportunity arose.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:35,
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That's curious.I knew a girl called Sally who was mad for anal. Nominative determinalism or sutin.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:39,
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hahahahayeah.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:42,
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shorter, slim, smaller breastageOMG it's almost as if there are two women called Sally from Oxford into anal. Fuck's sake, don't tell the Daily Mail, they'll have a meltdown about standards in society etc
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:56,
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Don't be daftTwo women in to anal in one city maybe, but with the same name!
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 15:00,
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Musk-tang Sally#HappyBarbraorwhateverhisnamewaslolz
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:42,
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he probably wasn't a girl though.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:18,
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Don't worry badger it was a suicide jokeBut you may not be aware of that b3ta meme
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:21,
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ah, right so.apologies, I wasn't aware of that meme.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:21,
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Don't worry, 'Uncle Monty' will take care of those 'little chats'(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:19,
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I think this might be the coolest use of science ever.forums.theregister.co.uk/forum/1/2013/05/30/russian_draw_liquid_mammoth_blood/
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:07, Reply)
Some of one of my research groups' stuff made it onto I Fucking Love Science last week.My work on this planet is done.
/apart from the blood bit, it has no relevance to your post. I just thought people should know.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:09,
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I've never followed that group on facebook, seems to be science for people who don't really get science.
(, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:10, Reply)
It's science for people who like shit quotes from Carl Sagan and Neil deGrasse Tyson.But, fuck it, it's still kudos when a picture of your work has nearly 30,000 likes and is making the religious right in the US froth at the mouth.
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the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:15,
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I follow the I fucking love science facebookand though a lot of it is amusing I do find that a lot of it isn't really science.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:18,
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If they could clone a mammoth and then genetically engineer them to be the size of pot bellied pigsI would totally buy one for the kids.
Or fatten it up and eat it, either way.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:20,
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Genetically engineered Mammoths the size of pot bellied pigs...May not the best move for a food source
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hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:22,
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Well I was thinking as a petthat I could eat if I got bored of it. I'm not sure I could rear a full sized one in my back garden.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:24,
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Chicken(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:24,
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They'll sell them off cheap in January.In a Mammoth Sale.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:36,
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Tit Gazzes(
hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:20,
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pictures of ladies.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:23,
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Disciplinary action at workOoooo I just got an Email from the headmaster himself explaining the schools position on religion. I am happy again now.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:27,
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What position are the school taking?(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:31,
Reply)
Reverse Dutch Steamboat.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:33,
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quite so.(
the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:35,
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The we are not a faith school but we are legally bound to teach RE with an emphasis on ChristianityKid pick up things like "God is everywhere" from these lessons and we teach other faiths too.
So Basically "Fuck off you whiney atheist prick" But I am pleased with the response.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:37,
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Best of all the former Conservative Party leaders(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:40,
Reply)
the illusion that I am not alone in a cold, depressing universe(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 14:38,
Reply)
Hey Facebook stalkersI've changed my profile picture to one with the wife and kids in so you can pick and choose who to wank too.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 15:11,
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Don't just watch the ads, WANK THEM!(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 15:14,
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If you prefer ads to two kids under 6 then your on the wrong page.(
Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 15:14,
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Soz Phil, I just don't fancy your kids.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 15:23,
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I like how you're sexually assaulting your wifeso that she knows who is boss.
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Bazongaloid, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 15:30,
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It's my duty as a manAnyway unless an assault is reported no crime has taken place.
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Peej, Mon 3 Jun 2013, 15:33,
Reply)
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