Assuming you have no self worth, what B3tan would you be and why?
Alt, what B3tan would you do and why?
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:20, 70 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

I wouldn't be any cheers.
I have krispy kremes nom nom nom.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:22, Reply)

so legless then?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:24, Reply)

Krispy kremes.....ohhh how is the diet going?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:25, Reply)

I've only had one, that'll be like 10 calories or something.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:27, Reply)

Close.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:27, Reply)

Yeah, it had a hole in it as well, so that's like 10% air, no point checking.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:28, Reply)

+210

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:30, Reply)

Naaaha, it's about 10

(PsychoChomp, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:38, Reply)

Twohats, because he is my soul mate.
Answers both questions adequately.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:25, Reply)

Release the PANATRON

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:27, Reply)

You're just jealous of our sweaty love.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:27, Reply)

I NOES
I wanted to be the meat in that sandwich, but you and twoey have better taste :(
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:33, Reply)

I was going to say I'd be you!
To save time, shall we just stay as we are? And then...nookie!
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:33, Reply)

Totes.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:57, Reply)

By that logic, any of them.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:29, Reply)

Hold up now, how long do we get to be them? Do we get to go back to being ourselves afterwards?

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:34, Reply)

Yes, just for a day.
I'd be one of the fitter women here, and spend all day playing with my norks.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:43, Reply)

I'd probably be 'swipe and sign over her flat to me.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:58, Reply)

Could I be Battered for the day and get some tart pregnant and marry her...
then fuck off back to my own body leaving him all bewildered thinking "HOW THE FUCK DID THIS HAPPEN"
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:36, Reply)

+ AGAIN

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:36, Reply)

There's no one here really who has the 'full package'
Maybe if I could make some kind of amalgamated b3tan, I'd have:
Windy Pig's good looks
Battered's money
Monty's record collection
TMB's brains
Rory's incisiveness
Stunned's drugs
Kroney's legs
and Two Hats' nonchalance

Alt: Aren't we all blokes?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:42, Reply)

Alt: What's your point?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:45, Reply)

I've nothing against gay people, I just don't want to have sex with them.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:46, Reply)

I'd fuck all the straight ones though.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:46, Reply)

I'm not gay
but I will fuck anything that moves. And some things that won't.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:47, Reply)

A good Yorkshire saying...
If it moves fuck it, if not fillet it.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:52, Reply)

Nice

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:54, Reply)

It is rather succinct yes.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:56, Reply)

Answer to alt,
I've met a few B3tan splitarses at bashes. Hang on, the REAL male B3tan could have hired them to pretend.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:45, Reply)

There were a couple of female b3tans at Needos when we went for Monty & Stunned's birthdays.
Then there were a few more at the pub afterwards and that made me feel all awkward and I had to run home.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:48, Reply)

None of them post on here now though.
Except rachelswipe, but I didn't meet her.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:50, Reply)

Good looks? Awww shucks. Thanks tango.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:06, Reply)

Yeah....
what's he basing THAT on?
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:10, Reply)

Must be this
www.b3tards.com/u/0fcb2734f07769c5925f/windy.jpg
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:11, Reply)

The only photo of me from download I'm high as a kite and look like I'm trying to eat the sky.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:18, Reply)

Would.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:30, Reply)

He's ginger AND from the 15th century

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:41, Reply)

^ jealous ^

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:12, Reply)

I'll have you know I'm a staggeringly handsome man

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:19, Reply)

Swipe seems to be the hot or not judge of who is/isn't
well when her and burke get together anyway
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:32, Reply)

I'd be Rory,
so I could do his wife up the shitpipe. Lube free.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:50, Reply)

I wouldn't be this guy, that's for sure.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-23004956

5 1/2 years of picking up Mars bars in the shower.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:56, Reply)

5 1/2 years?
Jeepers.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:57, Reply)

It's the half that's going yo really hurt.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:58, Reply)

I'd rather do 5 years than 6 months

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 13:59, Reply)

You could settle in after a year or so,

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:06, Reply)

Yeah, I reckon so
I get on with most people. I'd probably thrive in jail.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:07, Reply)

I think this attitude would help
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1996913

I mean, they don't really like gays, but I guess they still want sex.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:18, Reply)

If you get caught, I'll come visit.
I always thought an English version of Escape from New York would have the prison as pompey. Nice slums by Southsea, spinacre lookout, full of scum.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:19, Reply)

I watched "Escape from New York" a week or so ago TRUSTORY
May have been a couple of weeks ago

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1985753#post1985757
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:22, Reply)

Escape from Landport
MP for Portsmouth South Mike Hancock falls off his pushbike at the end of Lake Road. "Pig" Bliskin has 24 hours to find him.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:22, Reply)

Pig Plissken I heard you was dead

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:28, Reply)

Oh, it's Plissken, isn't it
Well now I'm just going to go and kill myself.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:29, Reply)

No biggy really I'm not that pedantic
Just realised the film is 32 years old
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:31, Reply)

Wow

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:39, Reply)

What a schmuck, if he waited a few months, he probably wouldn't have recieved a sentance.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:00, Reply)

Gonz that still sounds very wrong

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:03, Reply)

It's still a massive breach of trust, you'd still lose your job and possibly career, but at least you won't be a 'peadofile'.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:07, Reply)

well, in the eyes of the law, anyway.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:07, Reply)

Cynical.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:05, Reply)

It's actually against the law
For a teacher to become involved with a pupil under the age of 18.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:21, Reply)

also for anyone that can remember being that age, why would you want to go through all that immature
crap again.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:23, Reply)

I'd be Ringofyre and abuse his rep as a svelte charming young man to get with all the ladies via an online dating site.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:02, Reply)

his rep as a svelte
charming young man to get with
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:14, Reply)

'I'd be Ringofyre and abuse his as a all the ladies via an online dating site'?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:23, Reply)

Clickin dis

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:29, Reply)

"I did not have sexual relations with that woman!"
She just gave me a ham job...
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:29, Reply)

Although you appear to have read the strikethrough wrong...
"I'd be Ringofyre and abuse all the ladies
via an online dating site."
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:34, Reply)

Right if you cunts can be bothered I DUN A NEW THREAD

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 21 Jun 2013, 14:42, Reply)