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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Fuck's sake, it's raining outside and its too warm for a jacket.
How's your life being ruined by AA-level problems today?
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 7:08, 192 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
Use an umbrella.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 7:34, Reply)
ella ella

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:05, Reply)

I am wearing jeans, but I should have chosen shorts, and now I am 1.1/2 hours from home at work. Plus I'm fucking miserable and last nights storm kept me awake. Life is futile. Jeans were a bad choice.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 7:41, Reply)
Thunderstorm started early this morning. Fucking torrential.
I am wearing shorts, the same as I have been the last few weeks. Too hot for jeans mate. I'm considering reading the Mail today, to see what levels of wank they have come out, re the kid hatching yesterday. Trouble is,I loathe the paper. A problem indeed.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 7:48, Reply)

Don't recall ever seeing as much lightning as last night.

Ah, yes, the Royal Baby. I'm hope there is plenty of media and television coverage as I'm terribly interested in what seeps out of the royal clunge.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:00, Reply)
Storm was great
I have a uncluttered view for miles from the back of the house, I must have spent about 2 hours watching the fork lightning
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:07, Reply)
Gosh me too Doctor Frog poster!
I'm hoping that the first 15 pages of every newspaper is filled with ROYAL BABY CHAT for several weeks. That would be excellent. In an ideal world those tedious crickets halfwits will win something too, then the back 15 pages can be about that, and the rest of the news can be condensed into one page.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:11, Reply)

I have so many tabs open on my browser so I am able to follow EVERY live blog and update to keep me fully informed on The Royal Baby. I hope they call it Sean or Brandon.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:13, Reply)
I was hoping for Heinrich myself.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:13, Reply)

Or King. So one day it would be King King.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:21, Reply)
Don't be daft, they are going to call it Dodi

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:22, Reply)
People keep talking about how much they hate people talking about it
don't they realise they are just joining in? I for one am going to continue HOMEBREW CHAT and FILM CHAT
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:22, Reply)
The only time I would be interested in what seeps from the royal clunge
Is if I was filming a cream shot
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:11, Reply)
Oh look guys, it's Aled fucking Jones.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:12, Reply)
I am walking in't air

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:41, Reply)
Royal gynaecologist.
Otherwise known as keeper of the Royal minge.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:14, Reply)
Stop moaning

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:07, Reply)

Stop a r
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:08, Reply)
Fuck off.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:09, Reply)
Bit harsh
I think someone needs a hug
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:10, Reply)
I read that as tug.
And reached for the mindbleach.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:18, Reply)
Thinking about it having a tug would probably be for the best

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:19, Reply)
the missing comma here is most unfortunate

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:37, Reply)
Not as unfortunate as your face

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:40, Reply)
yeah yeah
you carry on thinking about fellow board members having a tug, old boy
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:42, Reply)
24/8
YOUR MUM GEDDIT YOUR MUM AHAHAHA YOUR MUM!!!!!!!!
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:11, Reply)
I had some sock woes earlier.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:16, Reply)
I too, know this pain.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:21, Reply)
This sounds interesting.
Small hole in one? Non matching? Bit too bright to match your fawn chinos? Please tell, hippy.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:21, Reply)
No he forgot the password to his Reginald Donkeyfuck account

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:22, Reply)
I'm too distressed to go into detail.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:24, Reply)
As is YM.
Hahahahahahaha. Ha.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:30, Reply)
AHAHAHAHAHA GEDDIT YOUR MUM AHAHAHAHA

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:30, Reply)
Too warm for a jacket, going to get fucking soaked later if this rain continues
Ah well, could be worse.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:20, Reply)
I don't have a bunch of money to flush down the bog
but I need to tone my body. I have literally no idea what to do!
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:20, Reply)

Eat loads of cake and burgers. That'll do it.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:22, Reply)
Exercise...?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:23, Reply)
This house is clean

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:24, Reply)
Don't be daft!

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:28, Reply)
OK then Tetsuo-style body modifications it is then.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:29, Reply)
I was talking about that film last night, great innit

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:29, Reply)
Yes

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:45, Reply)
This may sound really silly.....
but you could start using your LegoTM bike to burn off some calories
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:29, Reply)
I cycle 21 miles every day. My legs are solid. Its my gut that needs work

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:43, Reply)
+n

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:02, Reply)

Ooh ooh! I have another problem. A member for 13 days and still have an L plate. Shocking, hurtful and disappointing.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:26, Reply)
I think you should write some 'screamo' lyrics about how this makes you feel.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:28, Reply)
Or perhaps a 'sadcore' triple album.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:29, Reply)

I probably will write a little something in my moleskin notebook. I'll be sure to do it at a busy coffee emporium so people can see how fucking deep I am.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:32, Reply)
That's a great idea.
Afterwards you could stand near some 'street art' and nod appreciatively at the post-ironic polidical statement it's making.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:35, Reply)

I will. I'll link you to my instragram photos of what I find. Then talk about how there are 'systems' designed to keep us in place.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:39, Reply)
Have you ever listened to any 'screamo'?
If not, good.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:46, Reply)
Of course I haven't.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:49, Reply)

I can't say that I have, although I am VERY interested in 'sadcore'. This is something I feel I must research further.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:49, Reply)
If you're really lucky Plumdozer will send you about 15000 gazzes about it.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:53, Reply)
and 1300 of his hamster's little shitstreaked furry face
peering desperately out of his shitstreaked furry anal fissure
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:55, Reply)
ha ha

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:55, Reply)
keyword: shitstreaked

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:59, Reply)
I gave it a click

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:03, Reply)
Post some offensive comments and get stepped.
Then that'll man you up.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:31, Reply)

Any suggestions of a topic? Mods and dogs bumholes seems popular...
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:33, Reply)
Make a giant animated gif of Rob Manuel beating his kids and post it on all boards.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:36, Reply)
King of the steppers.
You went marginally up in my estimation.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:38, Reply)
Wow, that means a lot. Thanks, brah.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:40, Reply)
Find out personal details about someone, then go on about it offensively.
It worked for hippy.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:36, Reply)
Shut up you unemployable old bastard

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:38, Reply)
No.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:44, Reply)

Seems simple enough.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:39, Reply)
He truly is.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:41, Reply)
oh lol
mean but lol
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:45, Reply)
Sheds.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:46, Reply)
Finally got my new one assembled yesterday.
So it can rain all it likes.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:12, Reply)
alright edj

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:21, Reply)
I was planning on going into the office tomorrow
But a guy that I deeply dislike will be sitting at the vacant desk next to mine. So that's that.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:30, Reply)
Ah well, you tried.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:31, Reply)
It's all I CAN do, Monts
How goes it?
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:41, Reply)
Reeeeasonable, bruv.
Last night's rain has failed to cool my office down.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:47, Reply)
Ah shame
I'm not even sure if we've had any. Difficult to tell.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:51, Reply)
Actually I am several hundred pounds over drawn this month

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:31, Reply)

drawn weight
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:33, Reply)
Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
*comfort eats*
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:35, Reply)

Since yesterday I'm not.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:33, Reply)
Pay day on Friday, but waiting for about £600 worth of expenses to clear
Fucking process takes forever
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:36, Reply)

It's pay day every Friday.

No expenses for me, but my boss did buy me an umbrella so I'm living the dream.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:41, Reply)
Are you dole scum?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:48, Reply)
it's cq innit

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:48, Reply)
There must occasionally be some new people who aren't Al, CQ or Rory

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:50, Reply)

No, there aren't.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:52, Reply)
Which one are you then, Frogsy?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:54, Reply)

None. Although CQ seems a popular guess, strangely although I recognize the names of people on here from much lurking, CQ isn't one I recall.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:57, Reply)
You might know him as Wilf Lunn, Phileas Fogg, Foggsy, the Fogg-meister, Wilfredo - or any number of other aliases.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:00, Reply)
Kenny Foggins, Wilf I Am, Lance Armweak etc

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:01, Reply)
These are good.
Must use these more often.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:03, Reply)
Comrade Quixote
Wilf
Philleas Fogg
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:00, Reply)

Now it makes sense! I confirm I am still not him/her.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:01, Reply)
Fuck off Bert

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:03, Reply)

Which one's Bert?
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:05, Reply)
Pssst, your L plates have just disappeared.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:04, Reply)

I know! I'm a real person now!
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:05, Reply)
sadly I don't think this is true

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:53, Reply)
oh...why?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:55, Reply)
because CQ said it was

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:06, Reply)
You're really bad at this y'know

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:17, Reply)
er, no
i flushed you right out, because i knew that being accused of being a limp wristed leftie lithium addict would make you reveal yourself.

clearly you were never CQ because you can spell.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:23, Reply)

I was for 3 months last year. I just get paid weekly now, which is nice.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:50, Reply)
D'you think you should go and front up to your parents and let them know how you've ruined your life?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:41, Reply)
'The first thirty pounds was the hardest - but once I got into the high tens the numbers stopped meaning anything and I just went mad.
I spent £8.55 in Morrison's without batting an eyelid. I must have been mad!!!! I didn't have that £8.55 to spend but my inner Kenny Rogers just told me to gamble and gamble again with my future'
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:46, Reply)
I've written them a letter, I couldn't do it face to face

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:48, Reply)
ok so we braved the plebs in cov garden last night because I wanted to go to the Nike running shop
and on the way there, they had street performers hovering in mid air. how? how?!
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:39, Reply)
That's an escalator.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:46, Reply)
She said cov gardens not the natural history Museum

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:48, Reply)
Touching something with their hands?
Metal bar up the sleeve. Some bloke (Dynamo?)did it on the outside of a bus going round London the othe week, he must be pretty strong.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:47, Reply)
He's lost a lot of weight from when he first made it big in 'The Running Man'

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:48, Reply)
Sadly I get this :(

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:49, Reply)
That film is fucking brilliant.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:51, Reply)
I have always hated Arnie trufax

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:52, Reply)
Conan is great.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:55, Reply)
as is Totes Recall

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:56, Reply)
and Kindergarten cop

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:57, Reply)
It's the pain noise he does really gets on my tits, terminator is just about watchable
because he tend to keep his gob shut
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:58, Reply)
Predator is excellent

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:58, Reply)
What's Chompy got to do with this conversation?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:59, Reply)
"Get on my chopper!"

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:00, Reply)
"Cum with me if you want to live"

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:01, Reply)
Gonad more like

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:57, Reply)
I prefer Jay Leno to be honest

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:58, Reply)
one was yoda and he did have a staff
the other - I didn't see one but there probably was I guess

I wanted it to be real magic. or at least lasers :(
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:50, Reply)
I'd laser every single performer in Covent Garden
through their fucking skulls
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:56, Reply)
^

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:21, Reply)

Probably using magic, spells and wicca.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:47, Reply)
I don't think any basket-weaving is involved.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:50, Reply)

Or Alan. Because he's dead.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:51, Reply)
The power of Greyskull,
How's the fitness thing going?
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:51, Reply)
first real session tonight. urgh
still at least I have really beautiful shiny new Nike air trainers. or sneakers as Monty would say
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:52, Reply)

re +na
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:03, Reply)
WTN

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:04, Reply)
meh

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:06, Reply)
Has anyone heard from Battered this morning?
I'm worried about the little guy
www.telegraph.co.uk/health/10193826/People-with-epilepsy-11-times-more-likely-to-die-prematurely-study-finds.html
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:49, Reply)
in his case
strike through die

replace with ejaculate
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:50, Reply)
I er, don't know him as intimately as you do.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:51, Reply)
uh huh

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:51, Reply)
she just had a crisis thinking about it

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:53, Reply)
My not being a multi-millionaire playboy is pissing me off a bit more than usual today.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:53, Reply)

Take solace in the fact you ARE a Doctor now.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 8:54, Reply)
Its not all its cracked up to be, trust me

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:00, Reply)

Great news! My L plate has gone mere moments after my complaint. I think I might have some powers on here. Any requests?
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:02, Reply)
Drink a pint of wee-wee with a big poo in it

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:07, Reply)
Cut one of your ears off and send it to Rob, claiming it's his ex wife's

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:08, Reply)

More likely he will think it's one of his kids as my ears are ridiculously small.

(*Awaits hilarious strike through cock joke*)
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:14, Reply)

small cock lol!!!!
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:17, Reply)

Nice work. More imaginative than I.......imagined.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:19, Reply)
Sky has just gone as black as a Vadge graphic novel
I think a storms coming
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:08, Reply)
I blame Murdoch

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:10, Reply)
I aint getting on no plane fool

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:13, Reply)
Especially not BA

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:19, Reply)
new gmail eh, exciting.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:25, Reply)
mine looks the same

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:27, Reply)
Gutted.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:28, Reply)
i deeply, truly am

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:29, Reply)
It's shit.
I switched mine back to how it was.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:30, Reply)
it was pretty shit before

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:31, Reply)
It was all a little too easy to read new emails with them all stored inconveniently in the inbox.
But they have managed to solve this now by splitting it into several inboxes.
Now I can ignore emails for days.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:35, Reply)
yessssssssssssssssssssssss

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:36, Reply)
terrible bullying of PJ here

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:30, Reply)
Could be worse.
Could get paintballed in the eyes.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:33, Reply)

And then Speedy might turn up in a tank, not on his trademark bicycle.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:34, Reply)
I don't get this :(

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:35, Reply)

Byker Grove. Possibly a little specialist.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:35, Reply)
GET RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREADY TO RUMBLE

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:35, Reply)
i'm not your stepping stone

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:37, Reply)
?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:44, Reply)
The Flies' version of that song is a fucking classic

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:45, Reply)
William H Golding really branched out

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:45, Reply)
Ooh not heard that
You're right, it's ace.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:49, Reply)
byker grove
pj and duncan
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:35, Reply)

Geoff-man.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:36, Reply)
SPUGGY SPUGGY SPUGGY SPUGGY SPUGGY SPUGGY SPUGGY!

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:45, Reply)
Im blind im blind man

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:38, Reply)
Byker grove was shit

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:39, Reply)

Denton Burn in the house!
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:40, Reply)
Burn Denton would be more pleasurable

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:45, Reply)
yes it really was
bunch of povvo northerners with impenetrable accents spending their days at a "youth centre", who gives shit.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:41, Reply)
That was why I didn't get the paintball Ref.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:42, Reply)
Ok, to begin with I was quite pleased for William and Kate
Now I'm utterly sick of it.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:39, Reply)
i am utterly ambivalent

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:40, Reply)
Yeah, but HOW ambivalent?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:42, Reply)
Oh...'utterly'
Sorry...of course.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:43, Reply)
Someone was on Radio 4 talking about her healthy bloodline for fucks sake.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:41, Reply)
Can you imagine what the Express looks like today?
Hells bells...imagine what it'll be like once he emerges from the the hospital.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:43, Reply)
Someone be a dear....and start a new thread

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:45, Reply)

done it
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:46, Reply)
*STOMP*

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 9:48, Reply)

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