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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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I'm sweating like Gonz in a delicatessen.
I'm used to humidity from living in Asia, but fucking hell it's terrible in London today.

Your sensible tips for staying cool (including when at work) please.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:31, 145 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
take all your blood out into a bucket and put some icecubes in it for a bit

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:32, Reply)
Get air conditioning

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:32, Reply)
Fuck off.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:41, Reply)
wear light linen shirts and shorts,
pour cold water accross your wrists as often as you can, try and create some sort of air flow through by getting creative with doors and windows, and shut the fuck up whining and try and maybe be happy about the nice weather you moaning child.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:34, Reply)
This.
It's lovely - thunderstorms and everything.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:38, Reply)
Do any of you grown-up types have much experience
with changing large amounts of foreign currency? Roughly how much the bank will stitch you for, whether different banks will stitch you less, that kind of thing?
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:34, Reply)
I think they'll all do it on a percentage rather than a fixed fee.
However it is quite likely that this is complete bollocks.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:36, Reply)
Just to let you know
Cornwall uses £'s
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:36, Reply)
often "No charge" means a shit rate
check online first for the best rates, DO NOT change at the airport and you may even find abetter rate abroad.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:37, Reply)
It's not holiday spending money,
it's an inheritance.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:39, Reply)
in forrin cash? or electronically?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:40, Reply)
Foreign cash, it's a reasonably sizeable cheque.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:41, Reply)
In what currency?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:43, Reply)
AUD
I'm going to have to pay it in somewhere, obvs, so I'm really looking at high st banks etc.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:44, Reply)
you and your old cars...

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:00, Reply)
post office does it for zero commission i think
always a good idea to have a post office credit card, as you can use it abroad without getting raped.

she says, having a self-imposed ban on any store or credit card EVER, following the great egg fiasco of 2003.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:38, Reply)
Very handy for the lone female traveller in India, then.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:39, Reply)

eat
+ s
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:39, Reply)
i don't get this??

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:53, Reply)
It's quite good actually
look here great egg
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:56, Reply)
i don't get it

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:56, Reply)
greggs

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:59, Reply)
*shakes head*

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:00, Reply)
i just... don't get it?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:02, Reply)
It's not a robot that turns into a building y'know

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:04, Reply)
then i'm not interested, sorry
go sell your lucky heather somewhere else
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:04, Reply)
i don't get it

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:06, Reply)
i have tasted my own medicine
and it is bitter
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:08, Reply)
Listen to HH, this guy knows his oats

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:56, Reply)
Fanks

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:57, Reply)
Good old Heinz Wolff.
I used to babysit his grandchildren, you know.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:40, Reply)

www.moneysavingexpert.com will detail where you can get the best rates.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:40, Reply)
draw googly eyes on your bollocks and run naked in the frozen food aisle of your local supermarket
It is essential to speak in a weird, high voice at the same time.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:35, Reply)
Take your laptop into the fridge with you and work there.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:35, Reply)

Put another pint in the punkhawallah.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:36, Reply)
shove some ice cubes up your cock end and shit out cola slush puppy

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:38, Reply)
The heat of the moment should be no problem for you then

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:38, Reply)
i avoid it by having my own office with air con
although it's currently more than halfway up, it's bloody freezing when that thing's turned down
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:39, Reply)
^ This ^

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:41, Reply)
This thread is so bent I am actually looking back fondly at 'salted peanuts' now

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:50, Reply)
THREAD WOES!

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:51, Reply)
That was the best thread EVAR.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:51, Reply)
i've got a news link for the needy and desperate geeks of this board, i'll stick it down there, see if i can save this thread.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:55, Reply)
OH NO, IT'S A FUCKING TRAGEDY!!
www.bbc.co.uk/news/science-environment-23375344
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:55, Reply)
OH NOE

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:56, Reply)
And it still hasn't rained yet
It's muggy as FUCK
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:56, Reply)
Sweating like a suspicious horse time

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:58, Reply)
*narrow eyes*
*whinney's*
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:01, Reply)
we had a very brief, very heavy thunderstorm,
it's still muggy here, but i'm enjoying it. Got shorts on and everything.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:00, Reply)
I'm wearing very little
You like that, don't you...yeah.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:01, Reply)
i like that you're as comfortable as you can be in this heat.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:05, Reply)
I spent an hour in the kitchen earlier on
That was a fucking mistake
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:06, Reply)
ginger leg hair alert

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:03, Reply)
every one of my hairs is ginger,
and that's fine.
You however, have resorted to dying your hair, probably because you're a greying wizened old crone, and no one will ever love you, so you better run back to Gregg's Hat or Chompy if you ever want the touch of a man ever again.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:05, Reply)
whoa
someone is touchy about his ginger leg hairs...

also, sometimes you'd rather stitch things back up than go through something again
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:07, Reply)


(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:08, Reply)
dune woes

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:56, Reply)
Are they doing a remake then?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:58, Reply)
There were a lot of words in that story that I'm certain are not real words.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:06, Reply)
anyone know any decent restaurants in Bath for supper?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:56, Reply)
The Plug Hole is a nice place

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:57, Reply)
Pizza Express have some excellent deals.
*taps nose*
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:58, Reply)
Gon' partay like it's yo birthday

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:59, Reply)
IT'S NOT HIS BIRTHDAY

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:59, Reply)
This Spanish place was good when I went
la-perla.co.uk/contact
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:00, Reply)
There's always the Pump Room.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:01, Reply)
That sounds like a gay club

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:07, Reply)
You'd know.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:08, Reply)
Errrr no, YOUN are

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:09, Reply)
Yes thanks.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:05, Reply)
You!
Is Jeffstock going to be a long 'un? I have to work that day, and I won't get out till half four.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:06, Reply)
I'll be at football till five ish anyway.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:10, Reply)
Fair enough.
I'll probably tool along about six or seven, then.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:13, Reply)
i'm at v-fest that day
:(
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:13, Reply)
Shall we just cancel it then?


; )
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:14, Reply)
Can do.
Not arsed one way or the other.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:16, Reply)
That's the spirit.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:18, Reply)
Can you remember the name of the hotel I stayed at last time? Need to book a room.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:16, Reply)
Get Stunned to book your room for you.
He's good at that. Plus you can be guaranteed that wherever it is, you'll have a wet room.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:17, Reply)
Pissy carpet lols.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:17, Reply)
if he remembers to actually confirm a booking.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:18, Reply)
That was indeed 'the joke'

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:20, Reply)
I know.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:22, Reply)
Good because I know too

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:22, Reply)
Well I for one am delighted we agree on this.
Fuck I'm thirsty. Time for £3 Urquell in about an hour I think.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:23, Reply)
The pub I suggested is miles away from the centre of Bristol.
Well, not miles but far enough that you might want to change.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:19, Reply)
Ah. I shall investigate. Ta.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:20, Reply)
Just had a look might as well book a room at the Avon George itself.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:22, Reply)
when you get there you can stand in the bar adn think to yourself, Naked Ape was here once

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:29, Reply)
I thought it was a hotel, not a home for the terminally bewildered.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:35, Reply)
The Rodney hotel is 5 minutes away and 1/3 the price
probably a shithole, though.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:48, Reply)
Drink lots of water.
Sweat. It's the evaporation of water (sweat) that cools you down, so as long as it's not humid as a Turkish sauna, that should help.

An other option would be to MTFU and stop moaning.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:56, Reply)
dude
why would any of us want to picture battered sweating?

WHY?
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:59, Reply)
At least he's not Vietnamese

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:00, Reply)
I read this in the style of that Bazz Lurpak song

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 14:59, Reply)
I may be the only person in Britain who likes that song.
Although, 'song' might be pushing it.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:01, Reply)
I also seem to be the only person who managed to sleep through the thunder last night.
I vaguely remember hearing it, but it didn't wake me up properly.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:05, Reply)
The one where he jumps out of the butter and plays the trombone?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:05, Reply)
Brandolols

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:11, Reply)
Yo SC
Did that link I sent you in the Gaz bare any fruit?
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:14, Reply)
I've had a good look at that, ta
Think I'm going with a all-glass roof though, for the look of it. The existing one is all white wood and glass
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:18, Reply)
Going to get Mrs Cow's Dad on the case to look at it this weekend

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:20, Reply)

case to look at it game
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:22, Reply)
There is a gap in the market for Yorkshire ex-miners with 9.5 fingers

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:27, Reply)
+"
*Shouts B3th*
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:29, Reply)
Rodger Rodger

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:22, Reply)
That's easy for you to say
we can't all easily dip our nipples in a cold bath while working like you can.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:11, Reply)
+ while standing up

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:14, Reply)
I've had my flat door propped open and the patio door open with the curtains closed
creates a nice breeze from the unwindowed and hence cool stairwell. Also soak a teatowel and wring it out, then drape around your neck.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:14, Reply)
Do a bit wet sloppy, corn-filled poo onto a flannel then rub it aggressively over your face and into your open eyes.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:16, Reply)
"It's good shit man"

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:18, Reply)
My bowels are empty after I bumped in to one of your mums this morning and shat in her cunt. She loves that.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:19, Reply)
Only when you stir it, you fucking shitstabber

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:20, Reply)
Pour battery acid down your wee-hole.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:19, Reply)
Don't mention battery acid.
I'm having more car woes today.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:22, Reply)
Leaky box?
How about the car?

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:23, Reply)
Mwah hah ha ha ha.
ahem.

Indicator stopped working last night. We've taken the stalk off the steering column today, and a nice chap is coming to bring round a new one in a bit. Just hope it works, or I won't be able to take the car out anywhere.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:26, Reply)
Have you checked the bulb? The fuse?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:26, Reply)
No, it's definitely the control stalk.
It's seized up like... well, you on a bad day, I suppose.

It'll indicate right but not left. Apparently it's a relatively common fault with these Froggy cars past a certain age.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:28, Reply)
why can't you take it out without an indicator?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:27, Reply)
Just drive like a Londoner, they never need their indicators

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:27, Reply)
Fuck off.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:27, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2024540
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:28, Reply)
Have you tried pouring orange juice all over it?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:27, Reply)
Why would I want to try that?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:33, Reply)
is that wahts caused you to crash into that nice man in the Maseratti?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:35, Reply)
: (

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:39, Reply)
what's wrong with it?
have you considered getting rid of it and buying a more reliable vehicle? I know someone selling a very reasonably priced rover 400, only done 78000 miles, half leather seats, stereo, electric windows, good sized boot, great runner and MOT for 6 months.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:26, Reply)
Mine has only done 76k
which, for a diesel, is practically new. It's just been driven into the ground and badly treated by a lead-footed boy racer type lady driver who doesn't care about washing and waxing it.

ha ha smelly mimsy lols
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:31, Reply)
wait, are you the lead foot, or did you buy a car from a moron?

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:34, Reply)
she has to wear one of those really big shoes

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:37, Reply)
No, I drive like a chav in a drag race.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:38, Reply)
Move to Norway

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:27, Reply)
NO WAY.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:29, Reply)
Yes way Ted!

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:31, Reply)
WYLD STALLYNS!!

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:33, Reply)
Bergen is lovely.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:30, Reply)
SO'S UR FACE

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:30, Reply)
Imagine me singing this to you, in a creepy falsetto, to the tune of Stevie Wonder's wankfest 'Isn't she lovely'

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:31, Reply)
Haha I just did, and it was lovely

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:32, Reply)
if you feel your temper rising, take a deep breath and count to ten.
Aggressive outbursts are simply not cool.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:27, Reply)
Or take your shoes and socks off and count to twenty, if it's really serious.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:32, Reply)
Yeah', yeah' yeah', well, yeah yeah, well..... I'm sweating like Mrs Battered's frothy foofoo in a Yate's wine bar in The City.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:29, Reply)
Please refer to her as 'the former Mrs Battered' or 'micro's mother'. Thanks.

(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:31, Reply)
C'mon now, you know i'm going to call her anything but that from now on.
And don't try reverse phscologing on this one.
(, Tue 23 Jul 2013, 15:33, Reply)

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