the tube
whether i get it at 7am or 9am or any time in between, it's rammed full of cunts.

the lift thing drives me bonkers. although the design of our building is partly to blame; the stairs are really tucked away, and people forget about them.

alt: "this is 40" and "i give it a year". i like romcoms.

alt: cinema and dinner tonight, fish and chips tomorrow, might cook a lasagne or some sausages on sunday.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:35, 3 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

excellent vegetarianism from the hooray henrietta harpy

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:41, Reply)

click for "hooray Henrietta harpy"

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:42, Reply)

unlike you, i have other people in my life, and am happy to accommodate their desires
anyway, where do i say that it isn't vegetarian lasagne and sausages?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:43, Reply)

yes Rachel, I live my life entirely in a vacuum
Just because I don't bleat about it on here it doesn't mean there's nothing to bleat about.

You dig?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:46, Reply)

you have a small number of "friends" and haven't had a girlfriend since the 90's
hence the hamster substitute
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:47, Reply)

Ah, my official biographer speaks.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:49, Reply)

yep
you've bleated on about your ex often enough. if there were a current, you would bleat. bleat like a bitch.

plus, you know, you look like a monk with a hamster stuffed up his poo pipe.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:49, Reply)

I barely ever mention exes
You seem to have a bit of an obsession. Soz Swiples, I operate a strict 'no fat chicks' policy.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:53, Reply)

fat
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:59, Reply)

ah, a strikethrough.
The wittiest of retorts.

Typical Swiperton!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 13:00, Reply)

i just didn't want to be too harsh about your sad little life, pet

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 13:02, Reply)

this is gold, coming from the romance casualty that is Gillian Coppertop.
I don't blame you for throwing yourself under that bus the other week, your crippling loneliness and self-loathing of your bloated and corpulent frame would drive lesser women to terminal despair.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 13:05, Reply)

at least people fancy me, my sweet
try dressing normally and not being so weird and you MIGHT pop your cherry
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 13:09, Reply)

maybe I could try a Red Dwarf t shirt and a fake leather jacket.
That's more your thing, right?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 13:12, Reply)

he still got luckier than you've ever done
you might as well cut it off, frankly.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 13:36, Reply)

Not been on the tube for ages.
Thankfully.Although the Metro is probably the same although not as dark.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:45, Reply)

I love the 'DON'T FUCKING LOOK AT ME' attitude of the tubes
Same can be said of lifts
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 12:54, Reply)

When you get into a lift that is full of people
Rather than turning around so like everyone else you face the door, simply stand looking in at them all for the whole journey. It is very funny
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 13:05, Reply)

You should greet and shake hands with each person as well.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 13:06, Reply)

a superb addition
I shall do this next time
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 11 Oct 2013, 13:07, Reply)