YD.
Battered has had eight pints. You're in for a treat tonight.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:21, 3 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

And I don't mean he is going to melt in your mouth and not in your hand.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:22, Reply)

Does he get more charming the more he drinks?
I bet he does
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:23, Reply)

how repulsive a personality do you have to have for your spouse to ask a mutual friend to tell you that your marriage is over?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:24, Reply)

look in the mirror and speak to your reflection if you are unsure.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:27, Reply)

this is the best 'NO U' I've heard all week.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:29, Reply)

no speako northern. scuzi.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:30, Reply)

strange that, you seem to be attempting to communicate through a bizarre mix of Yid and Wop.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:32, Reply)

YOP!

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:33, Reply)

oh god, Gonz will pop up with another recipe destined to upset even the hardiest digestive system

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:33, Reply)

Naughty By Nature's follow-up wasn't very good was it.

( Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:42, Reply)

^ I get this ^

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:49, Reply)

Excellent work

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:50, Reply)

?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:31, Reply)

Battered's (ex) wife got someone else to tell him she'd left him.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:35, Reply)

whereas you can't get anyone to go near you at all

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:40, Reply)

oh Jill, so wrong, again

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:41, Reply)

uh huh
you used to bleat on about the ex mrs dozer. we all know it was your gran.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:43, Reply)

no I didn't

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:54, Reply)

#
I loved it

When I saw it, I couldn't sleep afterwards. I had the whole thing runnning through my mind- the thing that got to me most was the wtist, not the twist where you find out what happened to Anthony, but when you find out what Richard's motivation is.

I find it difficult to view it as a 'revenge' film, he's driven by guilt, so the only person he's getting revenge on is himslef. Does it count as vengeful retribution when it's to assuage personal guilt rather than right a wrong?

Considine and Kebbell were superb in that. Utterly, utterly believable at every level. Everybody I've made watch it (except for the lovely Mrs Dozer) has been struck dumb by its power.

(
Field Marshall Dozington-Smythe (Ret.) optimum wound profile
, Mon 21 Jul 2008, 20:28, More)
#
Tesco story

For the last 10 years or so, until earlier this week in fact, I sported a rather fetching ring through my septum. I'd become accustomed to looks and comments, but the wisdom of children never fails to amaze me.

One Sunday, while doing the weekly shop with Mrs Dozer, we passed a young family. Their young son piped up "Daddy! Look! That man's a bull!".

The parents were mortified. I, on the other hand, found the whole episode rather funny.

(
Field Marshall Dozington-Smythe (Ret.) optimum wound profile
, Fri 18 Apr 2008, 18:13, I like this!, More)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:56, Reply)

what, two mentions is 'bleating on'?
You do have some funny ideas in your ginger wee head.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 16:04, Reply)

it was the last time you got laid

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 16:10, Reply)

no, it wasn't

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 16:20, Reply)

You seemed a lot nicer then.

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 16:14, Reply)

this place changes people for the worse

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 16:20, Reply)

One day you may be a Al, but not today

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 16:45, Reply)

Really?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:40, Reply)

yes

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:40, Reply)

haha genius
you need to ditch your friend and come along. or bring him along.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:26, Reply)

ONE NEW INTERNET SPASTIC IS ENOUGH THANK YOU
not really
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 24 Jan 2014, 15:27, Reply)