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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
(
rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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edgy
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:22,
Reply)
Short nails, latex gloves and some bumlube mate.
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DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:26,
Reply)
and take your watch off.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:28,
Reply)
hey doc I have a scab on my face that I don't want to scar. can I pick it off?
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:29,
Reply)
How deep set is it?
And how did you get it?
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DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:31,
Reply)
Stop stalling and give him an answer.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:33,
Reply)
Unless it's very deep,
Hich I doubt, pick away.
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DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:35,
Reply)
I pick all scabs,
And eat them. That's how I stay so youthful.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:37,
Reply)
^hero^
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DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:40,
Reply)
I might sell the idea to oil of ulay,
Then they can pay poor people to inflict nasty injuries on themselves and then heal.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:42,
Reply)
Isn't the real secret to your youthful looks being about ten years younger than the rest of us?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:57,
Reply)
Yeah. That as well.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:04,
Reply)
He's googling an answer.
I bet he says cancer.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:42,
Reply)
Hay, that rhymed!
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:42,
Reply)
Only if you are a fucking northerner
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:44,
Reply)
Ha, he thinks he's people.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:44,
Reply)
Gay and northern....
...could it get any worse?!?!?!
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:46,
Reply)
its not that bad and it looks ready to come off but should I let it fall of naturally?
There was an 'incident'.....
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:35,
Reply)
Did she fuck your face with her lady penis?
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:36,
Reply)
Did Rachel swipe you again?
Just pick it you girl.
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DBT became a fruitarian on, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:37,
Reply)
okay I picked it and its bleeding thanks doc!
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:39,
Reply)
Send me the scab.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:40,
Reply)
its the shape of a lightning bolt
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:41,
Reply)
More lies.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:43,
Reply)
It's true, I told swipe I looked like Harry potter now
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:44,
Reply)
Did that make her happy?
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:50,
Reply)
Not really given it's on my upper lip.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:50,
Reply)
Did she fuck your face with her lady penis?
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:54,
Reply)
No. I mean yes, but that didn't cause it.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:56,
Reply)
Never seen a face picked off.
Better ask a doctor.
(
edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:34,
Reply)
mr horrible does it better
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:28,
Reply)
I thought that we needed a non-bullying thread that Jason could really get behind, SBT could put his finger on and you can get your teeth into.
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:31,
Reply)
Making you feel alright.
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edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:33,
Reply)
alright
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:33,
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alright?
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:34,
Reply)
Yes, ta for axing
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edjogs Collared doves are shit., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:35,
Reply)
You stupid cunt.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:32,
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hello windypoos
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:33,
Reply)
Alright doz.
How's York?
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:36,
Reply)
cold. expensive. culturally somewhere in the mid nineties
Great pubs though.
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:47,
Reply)
That's pretty forward for Yorkshire.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:55,
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You stupid cunt
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:51,
Reply)
alright
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:55,
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Do you mind?
This is a family forum.
I might've wanted to enjoy a nice thread with my children here.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:55,
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You don't have any children, you pathetic hoaxer
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:56,
Reply)
That's not the point
Other people with children and/or not made up spouses may wish to enjoy off topic without all this b*mh*le talk.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:00,
Reply)
You and your kids are cunts.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 19:57,
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Oh God you are so right.
The kids especially are well cunt.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:01,
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Actually, I'm sorry, you're alright. It's just those damn cunt kids.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:05,
Reply)
and their thick mother
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:06,
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She doesn't know any better though
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:06,
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Bless her, she hasn't got a bastard clue
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:17,
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fucking cunt kids
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:01,
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When is your second one dropping?
That's assuming it is yours
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:19,
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end of march
expect strange rambling posts at 3am for several weeks/months
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:36,
Reply)
The second one is a doddle
Unless your first one was a doddle, in which case you're in for a massive shock
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:39,
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first one was 4 1/2 pounds of nonsense that needed feeding every fucking hour
so fingers crossed this one is bigger and better
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:43,
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Some poor genes there
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:44,
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What do you want this one to be; girl, boy or hermaphrodite?
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:46,
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He needs a boy this time, otherwise he'll have to go again
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:47,
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Enough about your internet browsing history thanks.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:00,
Reply)
Shit off Gay boy.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:06,
Reply)
^ upset
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:07,
Reply)
/\ /\
_
_ _ _ ______ ___ | |_
| | | | ' \ ___|/ o \| __|
| |_| | D ___ | _/| |__
\__,_| ._/____|\___/|____|
|_|
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:09,
Reply)
it appears to be especially spastic in here this evening
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:12,
Reply)
^ TBSGI
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:13,
Reply)
In the kingdom of the spastics the bent one is king bent spastic
Or summat
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:16,
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King bent spastic in crimson trousers, no less.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:20,
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Posh git.
Around here we say arseholes.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:12,
Reply)
alright arsehole?
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:15,
Reply)
Alright anusol?
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:19,
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He's not posh. He's from Aberdeen.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:16,
Reply)
This is fucking shit and Dozer is a fucking cunt. I'm off.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:16,
Reply)
^
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:17,
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Whoa, deletion.
MODS!
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:26,
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What did I miss?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:27,
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Something about an ex colleague with huge tits who's husband died from a massive brain tumour shortly after being done for diddling an old lady on his rounds as an electrician.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:29,
Reply)
Might have been a plumber; the details are a bit hazy now.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:29,
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Tell me more about the tits
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:30,
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they were huge and oily
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:30,
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Cor!
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:31,
Reply)
Wait, do you mean they secreted their own oil?
Or had they had some other oil applied to them
in a sexy way?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:33,
Reply)
Brent crude, liberally applied.
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:34,
Reply)
Like a pair of zeppelins trying to escape from a tarpaulin
that was only tethered to the ground by a single, straining button.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:31,
Reply)
oh the humanity!
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:32,
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it was too sad a story to bear :'(
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:29,
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also, whose
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:30,
Reply)
I also worked with the guy's nephew for a couple of years.
As far as I know he hasn't been in the dock for diddling with senile old women.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:30,
Reply)
eew
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:31,
Reply)
I think that, just possibly, his actions were driven by the massive cancerous growth in his head
rather than any great desire to diddle with senile old wimmin. At least that what my ex colleague told me. She reckoned she'D exposed herself to him and his his tumorous state he thought "Why not?"
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:34,
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sounds plausible
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:35,
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I'd believe anything she said, frankly.
Because of the tits.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:37,
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I like breasts
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:38,
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So does gok Wan, which I've always found a bit odd.
It's like he's living a lie or summat.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:41,
Reply)
How do you mean?
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:48,
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HE'S A PUFF!
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:55,
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The Shamens less successful...
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:56,
Reply)
Or, the Macc Lads' celebrated album track....
The missus sends smooshes, btw. Verily, she has swooped in to do so. You lucky bastard.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:59,
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Send her my love xx
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:01,
Reply)
Will do.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:02,
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Gok Wan? A bender?
Yeah right.
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:00,
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It's hard to believe I know but...
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:01,
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no way is Gok Wan a gayer
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:12,
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Fashion conscious, forrin...
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:16,
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he's too masculine to be a botter
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:17,
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People said that about Rock Hudson.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:18,
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Yeah, draft a strongly worded letter of complaint innit
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dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:28,
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^ UPSET ^
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:28,
Reply)
alright batts
what are you working on?
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:45,
Reply)
His second bottle of red, probably.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:46,
Reply)
If only...
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:47,
Reply)
Bit of KP*G, also a bit of a retail acquisition, bit of sticking pins in a voodoo doll of my ex.
How's Winchester? I loved living there - long time ago though.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:47,
Reply)
quiet, almost too quiet...
to be fair mrs ape isn't up to much and we've not found a cheap, reliable baby sitter.
I have to say, poor micro, but could have happened to anyone really.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:51,
Reply)
It could have happened, but it was avoidable if my ex had realised the stairs were too steep, too wet & there were too many of them (flight of about 40 steps). I would never have let micro walk up them without her holding on to me.
Think you'll settle down there?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:53,
Reply)
Maybe, probably more in the country. In time
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:12,
Reply)
In other news, ask Swipe for details of her family place in Cornwall. Looks ideal for a young family. I will be arranging to stay there with micro this year.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:14,
Reply)
To be fair, Joseph Fritzl's cellar was given the same description and look how that turned out.
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:16,
Reply)
A great holiday destination I never had the opportunity to try.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:16,
Reply)
Calm down Bartleby...
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Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Tue 11 Feb 2014, 21:18,
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sma?
Powdered baby milk?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:52,
Reply)
i fucking love mash potato mixed with some butter sweated leeks
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:52,
Reply)
is she still in jail?
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:52,
Reply)
Don't think so, but couldn't care less; the recipe is good regardless.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 20:57,
Reply)
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