Off Topic
Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
(
rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest,
836,
835,
834,
833,
832, ...
1
« Go Back |
Popular
Cornflake pissing
My tenants have just decided they dont want to buy the house
When was the last time someone took a massive piss into a breakfast cereal of your choice?
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:16,
157 replies,
latest was 11 years ago)
I pissed all over YM's face this morning.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:22,
Reply)
A couple of weeks ago I was served a pint in a glass that was still warm from the washer.
You don't know true pain.
(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:25,
Reply)
This is just the most disappointing thing
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:45,
Reply)
ugh, silly bastards
they may change their minds again. and if not, someone else will buy it. maybe for more money.
this morning. i have to make a massive technical call on whether to seek documents that will make the case if they say what i want. or possibly break it if they don't. only £30,000,000 at stake, so nothing to worry about.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:25,
Reply)
Fuck that
They are annoying me now so can fuck off
/Rory
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:30,
Reply)
My solicitor, when I got the latest bill.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:35,
Reply)
They must charge £150 for every letter they send.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:36,
Reply)
Associate - £185 an hour, partner - £265. Plus VAT etc.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:41,
Reply)
+ disbs
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:43,
Reply)
The was a button on the seats of the train that didn't do anything, I was quite disappointed.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:38,
Reply)
How do you know it didn't do anything?
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:40,
Reply)
Because I dismantled the seat using my victorinox swiss army knife and discovered that the spring loaded push button assembly mounted on in wasn't attached or wired into anything that would cause an action to occur obviously. Durrrr.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:44,
Reply)
That doesn't mean that it serves no purpose
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:46,
Reply)
ok then
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:47,
Reply)
Like the sig.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:56,
Reply)
we were debating whether there should be a comma
ie, is it "good homunculous" as in, well done? or as in, "good, homunculous", as in, a plan has come together with pleasing results?
or as in, our train journey was too long and we were really bored?
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:58,
Reply)
Definitely the latter.
Gooood, homonculous. Gooood.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:07,
Reply)
YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
that's what i argued for.
in your FACE, bad homunculous!
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:09,
Reply)
homunculus
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:15,
Reply)
^ geek ^
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:16,
Reply)
Thanks.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:21,
Reply)
Thank you Master
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:58,
Reply)
I've got this great big bag of roasted almonds
Now what's nice about them is the generously applied salt, only some of the shells haven't opened, so those ones a bit disappointing.
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:42,
Reply)
Apart from that, life is pretty good
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:42,
Reply)
Nut woest
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:45,
Reply)
i quite like almonds
i used to think they were the weakest link in any bag of mixed nuts, but now i've realised that goes to pistachios
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:51,
Reply)
It's all about the salt really
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:10,
Reply)
someone else will buy it
It's not like the property market is in the doldrums.
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:42,
Reply)

(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:46,
Reply)
BIGGAR!
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:46,
Reply)
That's a pretty good photoshop effort, right there.
(
Kroney, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 11:51,
Reply)
I swear I reckongise him from some film or something.
(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:01,
Reply)

(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:03,
Reply)
YES ! That's the one.
(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:05,
Reply)
I remember that website news report
MAN INVESTIGATED FOR DESTROYING MOTHER'S UPVC WINDOWS. POLICE PURSUE HATE CRIMES CHARGE.
(
Kroney, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:07,
Reply)
+by choice, I'm still rich
(
drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:07,
Reply)
He should be ashamed of himself. I'm utterly disgusted.
That shirt is fucking hideous.
(
Kroney, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:08,
Reply)
Also, Quavers?
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:11,
Reply)
Sunday Sport. Not surprised then
(
Peej, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:56,
Reply)
I got an email from a guy saying he didn't want to buy my guitar after all.
I thought the stupid cunt was actually gullible enough to pay 100 quid for it. Bum.
(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:15,
Reply)
I'm amused that one half of PJ and Duncan wasn't Ready To Rhumble
Following a recent pub outing.
(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:15,
Reply)
Were any mics damaged during the assault?
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:16,
Reply)
Psyche!
(
Peej, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:42,
Reply)
No pissage of any description here.
Had a blinding weekend, which has put me in a rather chipper mood. Won't last. I'm sure I'll have soggy cornflakes again soon.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:21,
Reply)
The pub I had my darts competition in only had Guinness on tap or bottles for £3.50
I opted for Guinness and Mr Bum still hasn't fully recovered.
(
Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:25,
Reply)
alright
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:26,
Reply)
well you killed this thread
killed it GOOD
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:37,
Reply)
We're not really getting off the ground today, are we?
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:40,
Reply)
Bit jaded after our "We Hate Tangers" bash.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:41,
Reply)
The best bit was when Tangles wasn't there.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:42,
Reply)
I didn't meet any b3tans for a bevvy this weekend, sad times
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:43,
Reply)
Standard.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:44,
Reply)
I'm still wearing my balloon pants.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:44,
Reply)
I am wearing a turquoise shirt
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:45,
Reply)
STOP!
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:46,
Reply)
*pops*
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:46,
Reply)
I'm sorry.
The correct answer was 'HAMMER TIME!'
But thank you for playing. You child.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:51,
Reply)
Oh well, I've had a great day!
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:51,
Reply)
I DIDNT WANT TO COME TO YOUR STUPID BASH ANYWAY :(
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:44,
Reply)
Oh man I could've really contributed to a bash like that
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:43,
Reply)
You wouldn't have fitted right in.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:44,
Reply)
hey, you could always join Twang Club
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:44,
Reply)
it was euthanasia
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:41,
Reply)
Bad times Sporters.
They were probably cunts anyway xx
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:42,
Reply)
Just a pain in the arse, really
Estate agents round there on Saturday
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:45,
Reply)
Put their rent up
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:45,
Reply)
Jay knows all about 'a pain in the arse'
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:46,
Reply)
That's because he's a cum swallowing pervert who should be shot.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:51,
Reply)
it could be worse.
He could be black.
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:52,
Reply)
I saw a Chinese downs the other day,
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:56,
Reply)
Better to be black than queer.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:56,
Reply)
Your office?
Why are estate agents coming to your office?
You're not even permanent.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:46,
Reply)
Have you not sobered up yet?
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:51,
Reply)
I got home yesterday and started drinking again.
Idiot!
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:53,
Reply)
\o/
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:53,
Reply)
Sounds like a sterling plan.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:54,
Reply)
Kidney failure by the age of 45^^
(
Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:37,
Reply)
gaz Albert Marshmallow for advice, he's a property investment expert
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:46,
Reply)
a property investment expert rory
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:49,
Reply)
Rory's a REIT cunt.
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:51,
Reply)
what, nothing for this?
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:52,
Reply)
we couldn't hear you from the depths of rory's arse
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:55,
Reply)
Hey everybody! It's the 'cetacean sensation', the walrus of lawyerland, the resident ranga of Kenzers, Miss Rrrrrrrachelswipe!
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:58,
Reply)
hahaha
now you're even using his own words. poor dozer. at least try for some originality, eh?
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:02,
Reply)
using his words?
Pretty sure that's an original Dozerino composition.
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:03,
Reply)
nope
nope it is not. numerous repetitions in there.
go and read a dictionary. then come back to us, mm-kay?
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:04,
Reply)
nope, pretty sure it's my own work
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:05,
Reply)
Detective Super Nintendo Swipe is on the case again
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:52,
Reply)
the real mallow is not him
but fucking hell, it sure sounds like him on some of the comments this week.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:52,
Reply)
it doesn't though
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:53,
Reply)
well, i don't slavishly pore over his every word whilst wanking myself into a sycophantic frenzy and trying desperately to emulate him, like you do
but yes. yes it does. bragging about property and the use of language and the way he does the ^ ^ with a comment about the poster above. classic pikey.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:55,
Reply)
^creepy offline stalker
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:55,
Reply)
she really is, isn't she?
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:57,
Reply)
me? or hamsterbumbumboy?
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:57,
Reply)
dunno, ent that what Rory calls you
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:58,
Reply)
sounds like his sort of charm
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:01,
Reply)
Why would anyone emulate Rory?
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:57,
Reply)
god knows, ask his sweaty-palmed little acolyte
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:57,
Reply)
Because he's edgy and cool.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:57,
Reply)
I have one of these "learn at lunchtime" things today.
Still, free sangers.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:50,
Reply)
What's the subject?
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:50,
Reply)
Lessons learned on one of our Swiss cases.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:53,
Reply)
Full of holes was it?
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:55,
Reply)
!
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:57,
Reply)
This is the correct way to hoard nazi gold...
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:56,
Reply)
I don't know why they don't just chemically castrate your sort instead of all this politically correct bollocks
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:51,
Reply)
I know.
It'd be kinder in the long run.
(
Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:54,
Reply)
our training session sandwiches always suck
they get too clever with the fillings. fuck off with your fancy fillings.
and then the meat eating cunts nick all the veggie ones, because they are always better.
but you know, enjoy yours and all that. hope you don't find a pube in one of them.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 12:54,
Reply)
Have we had all the Brizzle goss yet?
Get some pics up, let's have a laugh!
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:01,
Reply)
NO PICS
we don't want dozer to lose the plot altogether
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:02,
Reply)
lolwut
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:03,
Reply)
Don;t tell me someone else was wearing a funny slogan hoodie!?!
What are the odds!!?
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:04,
Reply)
nobody else was wearing a "vain twat" hoodie, no
in fact, everyone was disturbingly normally dressed. there was nothing to laugh at.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:05,
Reply)
oh man
Stop cyber bullying me, yeah?
(
dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:06,
Reply)
Vain Twat was a really cool label at the time. And those combats are Carhartt.
(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:15,
Reply)
CarharttCunt hair
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:18,
Reply)
You know, that picture you put on FB the other shows that you REALLY can't deny being ginger.
(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:07,
Reply)
I told her that at great length on Saturday.
(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:07,
Reply)
This was AFTER her hair cut, yah?
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:11,
Reply)
i had the grey bits out and everything the day before
the colour was called "warm golden brown".
THIS IS NOT GINGER.
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:32,
Reply)
If it has to be called a made up colour then it's hiding the fact that it's ginger.
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:48,
Reply)
*stalks*
*agrees*
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:26,
Reply)
IT WAS JUST THE LIGHTING
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:31,
Reply)
Glighting
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:33,
Reply)
Ginger light bulbs?
(
Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:50,
Reply)
Start a new thread please!
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Mon 24 Mar 2014, 13:19,
Reply)
« Go Back |
Reply To This »
Pages: Latest,
836,
835,
834,
833,
832, ...
1