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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Hi shunts!!
what's the best insult you've ever received?
alt. Do you read any papers? I really don't these days and here is why:
www.bbc.co.uk/news/blogs-the-papers-29909297
People are spoon fed their beliefs. I'd rather be thick and uneducated than told my opinion.
altalt. I think Monty covered it but what are you doing this evening? Fuck fireworks, but I may watch V For Vendetta to get into the spirit.
altaltalt. Lunch.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:41, 193 replies, latest was 10 years ago)
Have you not killed yourself yet?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:43, Reply)
^Loves a roman candle. ^

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:45, Reply)
I prefer a big bang.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:45, Reply)
MY PAEDO BEARD IS NOT WISPY!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:45, Reply)
You're like a white Shaolin Monk.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:47, Reply)
tangles is Tai Djin!!!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:53, Reply)
I was going for Pai Mei

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:53, Reply)
Mine is better, and not in a shit film so I win

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:54, Reply)
In YOUR opinion.
fricken shunt
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:57, Reply)
You clearly don't know who Tai Djin is.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:57, Reply)
I don't know what either of you are on about, so I declare Frog the winner.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:57, Reply)
Tai Djin is the 'kung fu werewolf', a shaolin monk who may or may not have been real

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:59, Reply)
Ok you win. If only for him in that suit.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:01, Reply)
You're only saying that because I have an excessively hairy face and an ill-fitting suit.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:05, Reply)
And because I wish you had died in 1928

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:08, Reply)
In many ways I did.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:10, Reply)
Chewbacca scrubs up well

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:15, Reply)
V for Vendetta?
C for Chutney, more like!
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:46, Reply)
D for Dozzzzzzzzzzer

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:47, Reply)
A for Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:51, Reply)
You'll get the help you need, don't worry.
and we won't judge you much.

M is for Milking your "jokes" so dry they scream for water.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:54, Reply)
^ U for Upset

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:15, Reply)
U wish I cared that much.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:16, Reply)
U for Uneducated Council Fartmonkey

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:17, Reply)
U are worse than a black

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:20, Reply)
U are a paedo.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:28, Reply)
U are worse than a black paedo

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:32, Reply)
U are not funny, or "edgy"
Kill yourself.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:34, Reply)
Insult wise, I'm not sure
Being turned into a Paki by Monty probably.

Alt:
I dont really read the papers, never have done. I get my news ONLINE, normally via BBC

AltAlt:
Tonight, nowt. Probably a joyous visit to Sainsburys

AltAltAlt:
Peri-peri chicken sarnie
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:52, Reply)
I don't think Im gonna have deaf, fat, bald Mr Potatohead with plastic screw on ears, topped.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:56, Reply)
^GAY^

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:56, Reply)
THANKYOUSIR

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:57, Reply)
ha!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 11:58, Reply)
this has nothing at all to do with office printing equipment

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:04, Reply)
Alt: What you can do is read a selection of sources
and then make an informed opinion, essentially what you have there is left and right wing press taking the bits of an impartial report to make their headlines follow what their readership want. That shouldn't stop you from thinking
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:08, Reply)
The funny thing is that he was spoonfed the idea that he is thick and uneducated by us.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:11, Reply)
Yes, but I have plenty of IRL interactions to counteract your beliefs.
Swings and seesaws or whatever.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:18, Reply)
You mean your friends are even thicker?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:21, Reply)
Then word got round 'The North' that he was thick and uneducated, and before you know it PPIClaims4U Team Leader (10-6 Shift)

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:24, Reply)
I wish I worked 10 - 6

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:29, Reply)
I do sometimes read articles on several sites to see how it's manipulated.
I just wish more peoples eyes were open to it.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:12, Reply)
Oh B3th =(
www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2819031/Firefighters-forced-wear-gas-masks-rescued-25-stone-man-not-washed-five-years-stuck-inside-filthy-apartment-knee-deep-pizza-boxes.html?ito=social-facebook
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:09, Reply)
Poo bum willy face
Alt: I read the times most days. As long as you're aware of the agenda they're pushing, papers are still a good way to get information and opinions from experts. Who know more than you. Because you're a thick Northern monkey aids Gay.

Altalt: I say every week, band practice is Wednesday, you never listen do you.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:12, Reply)
No.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:13, Reply)
You don't need 'experts' when you have McBeef to advise.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:15, Reply)
Mcbeef should edit all newspapers. Especially Der spiegel.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:17, Reply)
How's the band going?
Are you still a post-hardcore three-piece?
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:17, Reply)
Well, there's 4 of us now, but the singer doesn't really count as a musician, so yerr.
Gigs in London booked for February with a couple of promoters.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:18, Reply)
Good stuff.
Anything available to listen to yet?
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:24, Reply)
There are some proper shit recordings on sound cloud so that the singer could write some lyrics,
But I don't think they're public. Soon as we get anything well recorded, I'll let you know.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:27, Reply)
I think prolly "gay cunt" was my favourite ever
but only because when I changed my board sig to Gay Cunt I received this lot:
imgur.com/dgfrMIb

There's three more pages. He was genuinely Upset Online.

He's the only person to Gaz me more than Boudicca
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:13, Reply)
Was he upset because you were using your cis white privilege to insult downtrodden lgbtqspo people?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:16, Reply)
probably
I am an appalling bigot.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:19, Reply)

bi fag
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:22, Reply)
no ... I'm pretty good at that

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:25, Reply)
Upsetman, more like!!!!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:16, Reply)
Haha!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:17, Reply)
Ew. Stalk much?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:17, Reply)
nah ... that's not stalking
Boudicca actually telephoned my old work and tried to get herself invited over to the UK to visit. Then claimed she was from a Mafia family and would have me killed. That's proper stalking.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:20, Reply)
In some ways, I miss bou.
In other ways, I hope she's dead.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:22, Reply)
I think Gonz still has her on his Facebook friends
That boy will risk anything for the slightest chance to bounce up and down on a fat chick.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:23, Reply)
remind me to tell you the story of how I accidentally stopped Gonz from getting laid after he'd traveled all the way to Inverness or sutin

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:25, Reply)
Why not tell it now?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:27, Reply)
You didn't remind him

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:28, Reply)
I once accidentally stopped Gonz from getting laid after he'd traveled all the way to Inverness or sutin

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:29, Reply)
Classic QOTW!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:30, Reply)
I like the bit where he accidentally stopped Gonz from getting laid after he'd traveled all the way to Inverness or sutin

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:39, Reply)
Aberdeen

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:56, Reply)
That's the one.
Excellent shitawful Scottish town memory there.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:59, Reply)
She achieved some impressive feats.
I don't think anybody else has managed to get an entire country blocked from this site.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:25, Reply)
I reckon R** F******* was making a good attempt for Oz

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:26, Reply)
Ultimately, he lacked persistence.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:31, Reply)
This place needs more genuine menkles

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:26, Reply)
I reckon Mortal Wombat is probably living in a dust bin by now.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:28, Reply)
they've replaced the menkles with closet paedos and rapists
sad times
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:30, Reply)
Put some effort in guys, I'm getting bored now.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:32, Reply)
stop quoting me........

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:33, Reply)
Here is a quote from you:
"whinge whinge nag nag I'm so busy bloo bloo do everything for me because I'm a big whiny baby"
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:36, Reply)
you love it
you dirty slag
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:49, Reply)
Get back to work

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:51, Reply)
No. I'm going back to work.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:34, Reply)
FINE

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:38, Reply)
There's really no need for all this outraged scoffing.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:34, Reply)
*snorts*

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:35, Reply)
ETS UN ITEREAGED SCAFFING

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:36, Reply)
It is, so it is

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:37, Reply)
THUS RICUD US CLARLY INLY UN VURY GUD CUNDESHUN SO UT US

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:39, Reply)
UTS GUT A SCRATCH, A SCRATCH EF YUS CEN WARRENT UT

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:40, Reply)
AYE NO YUR NAYYYYM

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:40, Reply)
MEI BROTHER'LL CUT YER HEID UFF

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:41, Reply)
Is McBeef Scottish?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:43, Reply)
He'd just be called Beef, wouldn't he?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:45, Reply)
But he never gets mocked for it, like dozer.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:04, Reply)
Oh man :(

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:45, Reply)
I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:38, Reply)
I'm just not inspired, Meaty.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:35, Reply)
I'm sure theres a decent bonfire in Schindlers List. Might watch that

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:37, Reply)
Never seen it.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:38, Reply)
I've been in a few of their lifts though.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:38, Reply)

been in severley tested the maximum load capacity of
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:43, Reply)
Nah, I stopped taking YM out before then

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:44, Reply)
Fat, stupid and shit at gaying is no way to go through life jaysums

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:45, Reply)
You're slipping into one of your other persona's DrFrog.
Are you sure you logged in correctly?
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:47, Reply)
Which one?
These personas are in a right state!! LOL
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:49, Reply)
RT TO WIN A LEOPARD

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:49, Reply)
No. You've spoiled it now.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:51, Reply)

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soz jaysums - - `-', :; \
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/:.; ;;)
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/_,: | |./,|
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/:;:|:,/;|:| |'|
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/;\_ /\_)) \_))\_))
(;(________
'''''`'''~`

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:55, Reply)
I HATE you, and everything you represent with every fibre of my being.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:40, Reply)
Why don't you just ignore him you fucking cretin?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:41, Reply)
He's such a fucktin

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:44, Reply)
A fucktin shunt if you please

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:44, Reply)
What's your fucking problem, mate?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:42, Reply)
GeordieJay
GeordieJay
GeordieJay
GeordieJay
GeordieJay
GeordieJay
GeordieJay
GeordieJay
GEORDIEJAY
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:43, Reply)
Fucking hell mate.
Get some help.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:43, Reply)
Can I swap you for an attractive stalker pls?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:44, Reply)
I wouldn't touch you with my least favourite homo-bashing truncheon.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:47, Reply)
well that's a damn shame because you were top of the list of Weird Internet Obsessives I'd Like To Fuck.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:48, Reply)
No, wait... The other thing...

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:48, Reply)
I demand full disclosure of this list!!! It's in the public interest!!!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:49, Reply)
Ask Rory for a glans at his spreadsheet. Im sure he has notes.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:51, Reply)
glans
brilliant
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:51, Reply)
Glans??? GAY

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:52, Reply)
ducking autocollect!!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:53, Reply)
There's no 's' in 'glance'
But there is a 'lance'
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:55, Reply)
I typed it on purpose, then tried to extend the joke. But failed.
THANKS. FRIEND.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:56, Reply)
OOOOH HE LIKES AN EXTENDED GLANS!!!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:57, Reply)
Hello Sailor!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:59, Reply)
HI!!!!
Oh, I mean...nothing..
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:00, Reply)
Bollocks
You don't know how to spell
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:55, Reply)
you don't know how to be alive without being a prick

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:56, Reply)
Who even is it?
It's terribly angry at strangers on the internet.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:56, Reply)
no idea
someone utterly lacking even an ounce of intelligence or humour
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:58, Reply)
yes, it's me.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:00, Reply)
At least you attempt to be 'a laugh' from time to time, rather than just piping up to say 'DURRR DURR UR SHIT'

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:01, Reply)
I'm in the top three best ones here

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:06, Reply)
you know that normally i* think you're the scum that the parasites on a catfish suck out of its muddy bottom feeding skin
but you're a shining beacon of wonder compared to this tedious japs eye sniffer


* and everyone else
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:02, Reply)
No one cares you stupid cunt.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:56, Reply)
he should slit his wrists

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:57, Reply)
Wot a fucktinous stunt

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:58, Reply)
Says Yankee-doodle-fucking-dandy.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:59, Reply)
I would love that to be a joke
but alas, I fear not.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:53, Reply)
That's a bit weird, he's only some bloke who posts on a message board you sometimes post too.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:04, Reply)
alright

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:57, Reply)
no

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:57, Reply)
upset

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:58, Reply)
yes

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:59, Reply)

I can just see you now, hunched over your laptop in the cold grey light of your study, the only illumination in that dank and muddied room the bleak and wilting light of your laptop, Tor browser running as you feel the last few drops of despairing semen drip from your flaccid penis as the masked man on the laptop screen removes his engorged cock from the twitching anus of the seven year old boy.

The boy gasps and sobs as the solitary camera pans up to reveal the gaunt and pallid features of popular b3ta sockpuppet 'baggenfock', CEOP closing in as he considers the quickest way to suicide when they eventually come knocking.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 12:59, Reply)
totes wanking to this
/ac
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:01, Reply)
aren't we all?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:02, Reply)
IT'S LIKE LEMON PARTY IN A BLANCMANGE FACTORY

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:04, Reply)
DELETIONS!! DELETIONS CONTAINING MY RARE WITTICISM!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:00, Reply)
I think it might be Baggenfrock slitting her wrists. Im fine with that.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:01, Reply)
Or Im on 2.0?
Either way, it's a win.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:03, Reply)
Christ almighty you're thick

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:02, Reply)
this thread is going terribly well for you

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:04, Reply)
You can fuck off an'all.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:05, Reply)
Ocado gave me a tenner because I sometimes send them funny facebook posts and I told them it was my birtdhay last week.
Yay.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:05, Reply)
what's happened to amorous badger?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:07, Reply)
Hope he's OK.
Always looked ill to me.
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:08, Reply)
His wife ate him.

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:08, Reply)
If Im on ignore from Baggytrousers, can I not see anyone elses posts in a conversation with her?

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:10, Reply)
Yes

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:11, Reply)
no

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:13, Reply)
maybe

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:15, Reply)
"You look a bit like Fernando Torres"
Fucking wide cunt goat a birst mooth fir that*

I stopped reading the red tops a long time ago and the rest of them are just as shit these days. I get all my current affairs updates from /newsletter

*not really I did 'a monty' :(
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:14, Reply)
He said 'Goat'!!!!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:16, Reply)
GOAT LOL

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:17, Reply)
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
www.telegraph.co.uk/news/celebritynews/11209782/Benedict-Cumberbatch-is-he-engaged.html
(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:16, Reply)
HA!

(, Wed 5 Nov 2014, 13:26, Reply)

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