Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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"Folk Music Lyrics followed you on Twitter"Is this your work, Tangles?
What have you followed lately?
alt. Im on a date tomorrow, few drinks and some food at Revs cos it's close and I've no class.
What was YOUR last date and how was it?
altalt. what would be your talent on a televised talent show?
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:16,
140 replies,
latest was 10 years ago)
altalt: I hope you don't go on a talent show and announce your talent as'Starting Internet threads'.
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:22,
Reply)
My threads always have several questions, inviting all to join in and break the ice, as it were.If you can't join in at least one then you must be an autisms or saink.
Sorry bout it.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:24,
Reply)
When I was a nipper I briefly worked in Asda. Shelf stacking in the toiletries dept. Livin' the dream.
This really posh bloke asked me where the spacers were, so I took him to the crisps aisle.
Turns out he meant spices.
(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:40, Reply)
Not that posh if he's shopping in Asda(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:47,
Reply)
Client of the day:Mr Ole Peder Christ
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:25,
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It was Mrs V's birthday last week, so we went to American diner Joe Allen's, where we drank surprisingly strong cocktails at the barAnd were pissed by the time we got to the dinner table.
We then went to see The Woman In Black. This production plays it for laughs, so it was shit, but we'd booked drinks for the interval, which made it bearable.
We then finished off (Eh?! Eh?!) in the pub across the road, where we drank champagne and whiskey.
The next day was something of a challenge, logistically.
If I went on a TV talent show my talent would be beat-boxing in the style of a 40yo middle class white guy.
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Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:27,
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I followed Hugh Jackman on twitter but the selfish fucker hasn't posted a single naked selfieAlt: Last date was ace, good meal followed by lots of sex.
altalt: Tenuous impressions. My Marlon Brando is routinely mistaken for Inspector Clouseu :(
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Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:31,
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MISS SHENANIGANS!!!!(nice work on the date)
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:33,
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I've got another one tomorrowWhat's worth seeing at the cinema?
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Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:38,
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Ex machina looks good but a bit sci fi for your ladybrain(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:41,
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www.londonnet.co.uk/films/
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:51,
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I can assure you Curly Sue is NOT worth seeingDuck Soup however..
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Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:55,
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Mortdecai looks fun(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:14,
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I do an amazing sort-of-French accent.(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:33,
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There is a BURM! LOL!(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:37,
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Where were all the sex obsessed ladies when I was a teenager eh?(
Peej, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:44,
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With me.(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:45,
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you talk about sex a lot.(
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:50,
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Twitter is for cunts. Massive, dripping welly-top style, self-absorbed self-important vacuous cuntsI followed a Ferrari up the M1 yesterday.
Alt: New year's. Excellent dinner followed by music and dancing*
Altalt: Certainly wouldn't be dancing
*A usage of the term 'dancing' that most people wouldn't actually be aware of.
(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:33, Reply)
Nowt to do with me, jasin
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:35,
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I said I'd buy McBeef that outfit if I won the lottery.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:36,
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Gary Olsen and Chalky off of Quadrophenia there?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:44,
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Young ladies down dark alleywaysAlt:
My last date was probably a meal out with Mrs Cow for my 40th. Steak, lobster, wine. NOM
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:35,
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Is it still a date when you are in a relationship? I'm not a fan of this 'date night' nonsense couples do.(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:38,
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DunnoOK then, drinks out with Mrs Cow on our first date. FAR too many cocktails
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:42,
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Sorry, I have to take your first answer. (
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:44,
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I'm quite a believer in them.Otherwise, it signifies to the other "I've bagged you, and therefore have no more need to make an effort for you."
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Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:46,
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Oh no I'm all for having a lovely time doing things together, I'm merely questioning the use of the term 'date' and raising my issue with yet another wanky phrase I dislike in 'date night'(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:53,
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'man cave' 'man flu' 'man bags'.I'm starting to see a theme with words prefixed with 'man' and the people who use them.
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Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:08,
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'Date Nights' seem to be popular with the sort of person whose content to go to a Nando's once a week for the rest of their lives.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:59,
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it's an Americanism, isn't it?it's for Midwest housewives who only have sex once a week after fried chicken and all the fixings down at Joe's Gourmet Continental Grease Shack.
(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:03, Reply)
I am the exception that proves the rule or something.(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:03,
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surprisingly i don't mind the occasional nandothey do nice salads and nice spicy chips.
fuck that nasty greasy chicken though.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:04,
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Yeah, I love going to places and not-eating their core menu.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:07,
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Perhaps if your partner is desperately needy?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:55,
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alt- lunch at Star Inn the CityCompany was excellent, food was mediocre, wine was decent.
(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:39, Reply)
05/10/14. Annoying wordplay and stupid conceits make York's Star Inn The City an
intensely irritating place to eat, says Jay Rayner.
(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:43, Reply)
For here it comes, the selection of breads – served in a flat cap, ’cos it’s a Yorkshire restaurant, right? And in Yorkshire everything with a pulse wears a flat cap. Always and forever. Yorkshire people slip out of the womb wearing them. Did they buy new flat caps for the purpose? Or were they secondhand? I search the rim for a greasy tide mark. And once you’ve had the thought you can’t help but wonder whose head might have been in your bread basket. It was an absurd and rather unpleasant idea when the restaurant opened – as a number of people said – and it remains so now.
(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:46, Reply)
I posted a link to a game called Exploding Kittensand @ExplodingKittens favourited my tweet.
I am still getting used to the way people I'm talking about pop into my conversation on Twitter.
Alt: My last date was Tuesday for pizza and a Better Off Ted marathon. It went brilliant.
AltAlt: I am entirely talent-free.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:49,
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Was that with your NEW GIRLFRIEND?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:56,
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whoa there hoss ... he has a new girlfriend? why did nobody mention it??(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:58, Reply)
It's still early days, so they're keeping it on the down-low.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:04,
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Why yes, yes it was(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:20,
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Alt. Does going out with the wife count as a date?If so we chucked the kids in their cage and fucked off to the cinema to so X-Men and it was pretty shit. I think I got a shag though, sex has become so boring that I really can't remember.
altalt. Its all about singing and dancing these days, no-one cares if you can do the condom up the nose trick or anything like that. I can eat a whole Pot Noodle without throwing up.
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Peej, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:49,
Reply)
if you can eat the pot noodle dry then I reckon you could get an itv2 comedy series(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:52, Reply)
Married life sure sounds fun!Do you not do anything to inject some life? do you think it's boring for her too?
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:59,
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I followed the guy I work with in to work, because if I caught up with him he would talk to me and I think he's a prick.Alt: what is revs? Me and ladypig go on a fairly regular lunch to byron in town, that you definitely wouldn't call a date lunch, despite being similar to a date and really a father fab time, or up to the rickety prest because it's lovely.
Altalt: being fucking awesome.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:49,
Reply)
I walk quite quick and it's a nightmare when you're trying not to catch up with a dawdler.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:04,
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this is the problem.I had this morning.Do you think my date lunch will pass under the radar of the date night war going on up the thread? Might be time for a cheeky edit.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:17,
Reply)
I've screen-capped everything you've said.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:19,
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I followed a bloke this morning because I couldn't believe the fucking state of himunsurprisingly he works at an online gaming company
He really was a fucking state.
(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:50, Reply)
^ not creepy(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:51,
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NO!(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:55,
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i don't really do twitterbut i shall shortly be following my nose to the canteen to get a diet coke.
alt: my last date was about 18 months ago. it was "alright".
altalt: i think i only have one real talent: speed reading. they should have more of this on reality tv shows. a bit of fucking peace and quiet.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 10:54,
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Folk Music Lyrics seem to post more gay interest stuff than any folk song lyrics.Also, put a fucking shirt on, tubby.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:01,
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Do they? I didn't dare look in case I was indoctrinatedSHAN'T!
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:08,
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DIG DEEP FRIENDSwww.crowdfunder.co.uk/get-monty-a-george-the-hofmeister-bear-costume/
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Peej, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:05,
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For £50 I expect to get a knee trembler from Monty dressed as George not just some poxy photos(
Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:10,
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I can't promise that without his approval sorry. Plus I'd need more than £2k to get him the suit and pay him to fuck you.(
Peej, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:14,
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Walked into that one :((
Ms Shenanigans put something interesting here later, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:17,
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Hey, I got a thank you email, not so daft now eh???!!!!(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:22,
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I must admit I was hoping to be able to send you a proper email(
Peej, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:23,
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It wasn't supposed to beThough they left out my line breaks and at least one "Thanks for helping us to buy Monty a George the Hofmeister Bear Costume!"
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Peej, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:30,
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I shall print it out and file it like i do with all the private correspondence i receive from you(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:31,
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this is excellent (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:19,
Reply)
tradegy? You spastic.(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:22,
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I followed a trail of jizz to YM's cavernous vadge.Alt: My last date involved a meal, copious drinks, followed by administering first aid in the street to a guy who had been assaulted, flagging down some coppers and giving a witness statement.
AltAlt: I would rather kill myself than appear on a TV talent show, but I've been told that my eyebrows are quite entertaining.
(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:05, Reply)
The e-petition 'Introduce mandatory noise complaint waivers for anyone who buys or rents a property within close distance of a music venue' signed by you recently reached 41,966 signatures and a response has been made to it.
As this e-petition has received more than 10 000 signatures, the relevant Government department have provided the following response: The Government’s reforms are not about privatisation, but about placing the financial power to change health services in the hands of those NHS professionals whom the public trust most, and putting clinicians, rather than politicians, in control of healthcare. The principles the NHS was founded on will remain as important in the future as they were when the NHS was created: of healthcare free at the point of use, funded from general taxation and available to all based on need rather than the ability to pay. Clinical services will continue to be available on the basis of need, as they are now. Ministers believe that competition can help to deliver better quality care and better choice for patients, and improved value for the taxpayer. The Government’s aim is for patients to have access to the best possible services, and providers from the voluntary, charitable and private sector all make a valuable contribution to the delivery of NHS services. The Health and Social Care Act 2012 did not introduce competition to the NHS, and overturning this legislation would not therefore prevent competition law applying to the commissioning of NHS services. The Act simply continued an approach of managed competition in the NHS and established Monitor as an expert health sector regulator to provide an alternative to the potentially costly process of bringing a court case against NHS commissioners. The NHS (Amended Duties and Powers) Bill would remove the mechanism that allows Monitor to ensure that competition operates in the interest of NHS patients. The Bill also seeks to revoke the NHS Procurement, Patient Choice and Competition Regulations 2013 made under section 75 of the Act. These Regulations continue the rules and guidance put in place by the previous administration that require commissioners to secure NHS services from the provider or providers that are best placed to meet the needs of patients and can improve the quality and efficiency of services. Revoking these Regulations would therefore not change the framework within which commissioners must take decisions on when to competitively tender a service, and Ministers believe would be a backwards step in the drive to improve NHS services. This e-petition remains open to signatures and will be considered for debate by the Backbench Business Committee should it pass the 100 000 signature threshold
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Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:20,
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Or!Thanks for helping us to buy Monty a George the Hofmeister Bear Costume!
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Peej, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:22,
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Christ just shut the fuck up will you no one is reading all that shit you type(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:22,
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D8 Nite is really more early evening Mon to Thurs cos thats when the early bird special is generally on when Mr Udagawa takes the Ladez out(, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:37, Reply)
I usually take birds to this fancy pub with pictures on the wall and shit so they don't think I just spend my spare time drinking in grotty old men pubs based on proximity to home/work.(
Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 23 Jan 2015, 11:39,
Reply)
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