Pop Quiz
The situation: couple, living together, dating for just under a year. She mentions (repeatedly) that her birthday is coming up. He asks her if he needs to get her a cake. She says no. Her birthday comes and goes, no cake, her feelings are hurt.

Who do you think is at fault?

Specify your gender, the problem gender, and why.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 29 May 2009, 23:27, 21 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Male
Male
Because it's all about the cake
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 29 May 2009, 23:28, Reply)

If they are living together, and it's her birthday
then he should have got her a cake, even if it's just a little one.

You can only play the "I did ask you" card for things like going out anniversary presents.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Fri 29 May 2009, 23:29, Reply)

She said no
therefore if she evinces the slightest disappointment she's not playing by the rules, no?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 29 May 2009, 23:33, Reply)

But she said no
hoping that he would get her a cake anyway, because he's all sweet and caring and stuff.
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Fri 29 May 2009, 23:34, Reply)

a verbal one yes.

(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 29 May 2009, 23:34, Reply)

No
she gets a cunt punt or a tit box
(cheeses swept kissed a dog and he liked it., Fri 29 May 2009, 23:38, Reply)

lovely.
truly, a charming thought.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 29 May 2009, 23:42, Reply)

A-hole
It's not funny
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Sun 31 May 2009, 1:50, Reply)

Female
Both.

If she wanted a damn cake she shouldn't have said no. He should have known she wanted a cake and bought her one anyway.
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 29 May 2009, 23:33, Reply)

I agree with you but what's with the
a-holes talking about slapping, kicking etc?
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Sun 31 May 2009, 1:50, Reply)

Male
Female - for not actually saying what she wanted.

Male - if they'd been living together for long enough, he should have known.
(Potty Jag har smör i min rumpspringa, Fri 29 May 2009, 23:40, Reply)

Male
Female

But, as others have said, if the two parties to this are living together it would be reasonable to expect that the no might mean yes in certain circumstances.

The problem here isn't that she is female; the problem is that both parties are human and thus fickle.
(Eds Meds Mathskillz=1,Socialskillz=0, Fri 29 May 2009, 23:45, Reply)

If it had been a 50 year relationship
If she says no, she ain't getting no cake.

Discuss.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 29 May 2009, 23:47, Reply)

Reply
Male

Both.

Her for saying no and then getting stroppy about it, him for not delivering cake anyway. Although I hate women who say no, they don't want something and then strop when they don't get it because the man misinterprets what they said. [/bitterness]
(Ghost Atreides enjoying incontestable health benefits on, Sat 30 May 2009, 0:07, Reply)

I'm female
She shouldn't have said not to get a cake if she wanted one. A simple "that would be nice" would have saved a lot of hassle. Of course women never say what they want, but hey, at least you know for next time.
(lei, Sat 30 May 2009, 0:12, Reply)

fucking women and their obsession with fucking cake
I bet if you asked for anal sex on your birthdy while both a bit drunk and randy she would cop a strop too.

or even a blow job if your a couple im aware of, gag reflex, snorts with laughter

ps

Male

Male, just buy one anyway, then next time you do something wrong she'll be eating it in a second
(Halfy By light alone, Sat 30 May 2009, 1:31, Reply)

Get the grumpy bitch a cake...

...of lux and tell her she smells down south.
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Sat 30 May 2009, 3:13, Reply)

Was going to say he should have arranged "surprise cake"
But now she's had the chance to get huffy, it'd turn into "guilt cake", and that doesn't taste so good.
(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Sat 30 May 2009, 4:55, Reply)

It's the man's fault, pure and simple
If it's the first birthday of hers you've celebrated together, and she's mentioned her birthday a fair few times, then HELLO, SHE'D LIKE A FUSS MADE. Some people don't care about their birthdays, other people do. She obviously does.

I've always made a big fuss of people's birthdays. I even organised and paid for a surprise party for my ex, ffs. It's just a way of showing care and attention and thought. You've dropped a bollock here.

I'd suggest you organise a caring and thoughtful surprise for her soon. And no, that's not slipping it up the wrong 'un.
( I_Was_Mordred, Sat 30 May 2009, 9:01, Reply)

I'm female
Her fault - she should have said she wanted one - no one is a mind reader.

That said, he should have got one anyway - if she didn't want to eat it he'd have had it all to himself - RESULT!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sat 30 May 2009, 16:33, Reply)

Am I the only one
to think it's a bit... crap... to be asked by him if he needs to get a cake?

Why would he ask her that? Is he not capable of taking responsibility for the cake himself? Just what kind of man is he?

Or is she so contrary and volatile that he thinks he will get it wrong no matter what he does...? Is he so scared that he needs her approval before he can perform a spontaneous thoughtful act? If he gets a cake he will be made to feel responsible for her diet going to ruin and her pants being too tight...? or if he doesn't get a cake she will martyr herself as a cakeless neglected victim...?

Maybe he has a vague and nebulous memory of her refusing cake elsewhere, maybe someone else's birthday party, and has confusion over whether she actually likes cake or not.

Or is he just too lazy to take the initiative?

Well, without knowing the answers to these questions and more about the history and background of this, frankly disturbing, situation, how can we be expected to make an informed judgement?
( warmfuzzies Isn't here, Sat 30 May 2009, 23:06, Reply)