ALTHEGEORDIE!
*sniggers*
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 10:56, 49 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I haven't started my essay yet.
*runs away*
*hides*
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 10:57, Reply)

In fact, does anyone want to do it for me?

( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 10:59, Reply)

All you need to do
is write 3000 words on any lunatic asylum you've visited recently.
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 10:59, Reply)

Not including this one.

( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 11:00, Reply)

Joins in the sniggering
but refuses to write 3000 word essay beyond, I visited a mental asylum and left in disgust at the inhumane treatment I saw there. I was only offered one cup of tea and the biscuits weren't chocolate ones, just crap rich tea which no one wants.

Love and Spangles,
High Queen Clendrix
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 11:03, Reply)

*copies and pastes*
Hurrah! I am now a trained counsellor!
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 11:07, Reply)

Throws party
congrats :)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 11:10, Reply)

Dahling! Thank you!
*mwah mwah*
What a terrible shame Al couldn't be here.
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 11:13, Reply)

He's a boring kaoltarded fuckwit anyway
But sadly I must now leave as I have many exciting things to do today and you have a mammoth essay to write
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 11:14, Reply)

*commences writing*

( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 11:25, Reply)

*distracts*

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 11:38, Reply)

*averts eyes*

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 11:39, Reply)

* averts imminent disaster *

( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 12:03, Reply)

Stop it you lot!
My stupid fucking Word won't let me add an auto-correct option to the menu so that's another ten minutes I've wasted.
But I've written 500 words.
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 12:22, Reply)

Ha Ha Irvine Goffman is your friend.
Presentation of self and subsequent papers apparently. Did a series of papers on life in asylums.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Sun 7 Jun 2009, 13:44, Reply)

I'd like to have met him.
He was the one who said something about life being a loony bin run by the inmates, wasn't he?
n.b. I have not referred to the place I visited as a 'loony bin' in my essay.
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:07, Reply)

I would just like to step in and defend the Rich Tea biscuit which becky has so cruelly slandered
I quite like them...
(LongJohnBaldry, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 13:36, Reply)

But
why would you choose one of those when the chocolate caramel digestives are only a few inches away?
Are you mental?
Would you like to feature in my essay?
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:08, Reply)

DO MORE WORK!
I've been cleaning for three hours now, you're not getting away with doing less than me today.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:23, Reply)

Oo-er
You all hot and sweaty then al?

*perves*
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:25, Reply)

I am a bit
but I no longer have a greasy kitchen.

I'm going to take five and then get the hoover out.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:34, Reply)

One more minute then.
I've done over 1000 words. About to start writing again.
Are you getting the hoover out for sexual purposes?
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:38, Reply)

I've just had mine out.
The crevice tool always makes me giggle.
Do you need a case study clenders?

*volunteers*
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:42, Reply)

I like that little, round brush.
Oh Tourette's, you're no good to me as a case study, because you are just mental instead of being mental and incarcerated.
You are also too delightful. I need naughty mentallers.
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:46, Reply)

bless your heart
Which kind of councelling are you studying? I got up to level 2 in person-centred councelling a few years ago. Knocked it on the head after that though - the worms were too wriggly in my can ;o)
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:57, Reply)

At the moment
I'm doing a certificate in counselling and counselling skills, so I'm studing all sorts. But I think I would like to go on to work with people who have been detained under the mental health act.
Long way to go yet, though! I'm just looking at Masters courses now *shrieks*
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:59, Reply)

I've decided to take enough time
to watch the rest of this episode of dollhouse.

No sex will happen with my hoover. I'm saving that for when the Mrs gets back.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:46, Reply)

But don't you want to be clean and free from dust for her?

( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:48, Reply)

I might wipe it with
a jay cloth layer.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:50, Reply)

Ah Al.
Making himself moist so the ladies don't have to.
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 14:54, Reply)

Speaking of cleaning,
Vanish stain remover spray looks exactly like jizz. I'm trying to get DG's face blood out of my denim jacket.
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 15:33, Reply)

Oh yes!
You drunken bums.
How's his poor face? And your ankle?
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 15:36, Reply)

His face is on the mend
Black eyes have gone and there's fresh scab on his nose - it's got quite a dent on the bridge. My ankle's still bruised but the swelling's gone down, thanks.
I never learn though - went out with some girlies last night and got cuntlashed. Stole another pint glass from the Tap & Spile (it still had beer in it) sent drunken text messages, ran out of credit so watered the garden at 2.30am. It's a wonder I didn't fall down again.

*is thick but harmless*

How's the essay?
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 15:53, Reply)

You're such a classy lady
Can't wait to see you again next weekend! Have you managed to sort out looking after sweary junior?
(Bazongaloid, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 15:56, Reply)

Still working on it
Hopefully we'll work something out.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 7 Jun 2009, 16:00, Reply)

Ooh, hello DG!
Yes, I too am very much looking forward to seeing you both next weekend - if you survive that long!
Essay great - nearly done!
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 16:04, Reply)

'Lo clenders
Still studying hard I see.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 7 Jun 2009, 16:07, Reply)

:D
I've just finished my essay, which means I get to laze around for a while and can watch the final of the Apprentice tonight without feeling guilty. Yay!
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 16:17, Reply)

Woo!
I'm debating whether to clean the floor, or just hoover it and clean the bathroom.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 16:32, Reply)

Just hoover!
As long as you do a good job, it'll look fine.
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 16:38, Reply)

Thanks al
*blushes*
It's a good job I don't have your mobile number, otherwise you'd have been victim to my drunken texts ;o)
Fingers crossed we can sort SJ to stay with mates. If the shoe was on the other foot, we'd have any of his mates for a weekend.
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 16:04, Reply)

The only thing digestives, and digestive based buiscets are good for....
is applying cheese, or creamcheese'n'jam to make a mini cheesecake.

Give me a Rich Tea any day of the week.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 17:47, Reply)

My autism cannot cope with these nesty replies
when they go off the page like that :o(
Al, are you after a blow job for all that cleaning?
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 16:59, Reply)

Al went out with another woman last night. The evening involved:
Back row of the cinema.
Chocolate.
Partying.
Drinking.
Smoking.
Watching a curvaceous blonde dancing.
Chips.
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 17:31, Reply)

Who was the blonde?

(Bazongaloid, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 17:56, Reply)

Oh fuck, yes I remember now!
Pffft!
(Bazongaloid, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 17:56, Reply)

Also in reply to Tourettes earlier question
not specifically, but our house hasn't been cleaned for weeks and weeks so I'm taking the opportunity while the mrs is away to deep clean a bit.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 17:58, Reply)

That blonde.
Such a sweet little thing - and what a mover!
Does result in ball-pain though, apparently.
( thealternativefact, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 18:14, Reply)

Certainly knew how to shimmy

(Bazongaloid, Sun 7 Jun 2009, 18:16, Reply)