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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Nearly the weekend, and all the more reason for


a cup of tea and some cake.

Tonight's question: what nicknames/permutations of your name will you, and will you not, allow to be used for you? For the record, shorten my name (my actual name, not my b3taname) and I will want to roundhouse kick you in the face.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:29, 107 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
my name is al. a few close friends and fellow tradespeople call me big gay al. which i like.
but don't ever call me ali.
cos i hates it!

good evening mal, how are you?
(I helped save b3ta! blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:38, Reply)
# Iiiiiiii'm super, thanks for asking! #
Sorry, couldn't resist :)
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:42, Reply)
My mother
gave me a name which is the shortened version of a much longer name.
Her reason for doing this is so people couldn't shorten my name.

As it is people lengthen it.

Grrr
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Entity is in hiding., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:38, Reply)
One of my friends, whose post on my wall on Facebook inspired this question,
shortens it, which I hate enough, and then adds -ster on the end! RAGE.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:43, Reply)
Gah!
That name shortened does indeed sound stupid. Adding a -ster at the end is just double-gah!
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:28, Reply)
I know!
She's a drama student but still, no excuse...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:49, Reply)
I am frequently called 'chris-teen-uuuuhh' or kristy, and a lot of the time at work I'm called Kris
I usually correct anyone that says christina. Especially if it's someone new, I am merciless after I correct them once.
Kris tends to be a name only used in my family so it really enrages me when people that I don't fucking know use it.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:40, Reply)
When I first started my job, they asked me if I had any nicknames.
I made it clear that I hate my name being shortened, and my colleagues now cower if they slip up and do it!
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:42, Reply)
ugh my boss is the one that tells people to use Kris
"Yea, call Kris and blahblah"
"Kris is in the office blahblah"

*rages*
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:47, Reply)
My reason for hating it
is the cunts I was at school with would always shorten it, so it's more of an association thing than anything. Problem is, I'm too polite to tell people not to do it otherwise, a bit like above where I should really say "for the love of god, [name], do NOT call me that, it's just fucking stupid!"
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:51, Reply)
I used to always hate my name, most people would pronounce it incorrectly, you couldn't find those nifty pencils with my name on them, etc
so I tried to go by Kris then I realised it's a bit masculine so I tried to ditch it

whoops, didn't work out so well
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:55, Reply)
I still hate my name; I think it sounds like a highly-strung breed of cat.
Possibly a Siamese or a Persian. Something that yowls if you leave it alone.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:01, Reply)
ha
cheers to that *clinks glass*
*wanders away slowly to see if you yowl*
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:11, Reply)
Mrrrrrraaaaaaawwwwrrrrrrr!
*clink*
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:31, Reply)
I've known several men called 'Chris'
so when I come across a 'Christine' shortened to 'Chris', it does seem a bit odd at first.

For some reason, 'Chris' was the most popular name at the university I went to.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:31, Reply)
I think Sarah was at mine.
I have five Sarahs in my phone!
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:31, Reply)
That's why I don't like it now.
It screams 'butch lezbo'.
I'm not a butch lezbo.
I'm not I'm not I'm not.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:35, Reply)
My boss's parents
are both named Chris, and her and her husband's names rhyme, which is lully.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:48, Reply)
Oh and
the Headteacher at my last school kept calling me MISS Liveinabin not Mrs.

I don't mind when the children do it but the head should know better.
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Entity is in hiding., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 19:55, Reply)
Given that she employed you
you'd think she'd know better, right? *headdesk*
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:00, Reply)
Well she didn't employ me
and in fact didn't give me my own job when I applied for it!


But she should still know better!
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Entity is in hiding., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:15, Reply)
Well, just on a basis of dealing with you every day...
... it'd be like calling you a different name entirely!
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:32, Reply)
My name is awesome.
And can't be shortened. Win.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:03, Reply)
That makes you double awesome.

(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:10, Reply)
Of course.
I have a longer version of my name, but I don't mind that too much either.
But Kaol I am, and Kaol I shall stay.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:13, Reply)
Lies
Many of them. Or 2 to be more accurate.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 22:16, Reply)
I am Simon
NEVER attempt to call me Si.

I may not be responsible for my actions.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:05, Reply)
Oh, I recognise that kind of rage.
I think I scared my colleagues by how clearly I said "do not shorten my name, ever. I hate it."
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:10, Reply)
Same here Sofa
I'm fortunate in that my parents christened me Mr. I still hate it when people shorten it to Miss though.
(mr bollox I love Mr. K best of all the kaoltards, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:06, Reply)
You're not far off the money there.
Who are you, good sir? I don't think I've seen you around here before...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:11, Reply)
All my family have single-syllable names
but my nickname is my nickname.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:06, Reply)
That's the way to go, I think.
Unless you have friends like me who shorten it, and then lengthen it again ><'
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:12, Reply)
My name can only be shortened at the front
and then it sounds like a certain rapper. As for shortening it at the front, if we all did that at the office, there'd be five of us with the same name.

Meanwhile at work, I've been staring at shiny things all day and not making much progress.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:11, Reply)
Sounds like every day at work for me!
There are two people with my name in the office, except one is me and one is a French girl with a dirty mind...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:12, Reply)
Except I have to make sure they shine the way things are supposed to shine.
At least you can distinguish the two names by pronouncing the other person's name in a French accent. I wonder if referring to <maladicta> with a dirty mind would also distinguish...
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:25, Reply)
I never said I didn't have one too;
just the one who is French is more open about hers!
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:30, Reply)
At least that way, if you keep your dirty mind to yourself, you can distinguish yourself from the other <maladicta>
But it will generate office-wide mass confusion should anyone find out your secrets.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:38, Reply)
Dependent on how stringent security is at Ashford International in a couple of weeks
this is a distinct possibility...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:47, Reply)
The mind boggles...
And that's the major disadvantage of working for the company you're travelling with.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:59, Reply)
And
I need my badge to prove I (and Pot) can travel on a staff booking...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:01, Reply)
Just remembered
they X-ray all baggage. Lets just hope your ... ahem ... equipment is dual-use (or that you can think up a convincing explanation).
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:08, Reply)
Exactly
the number of emails we get about strict security at our terminals mean this could well be interesting...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:09, Reply)
Perhaps if you do get caught, it would mean they finally get rid of the X-ray stage
and I won't have to go through the agonising ritual of empty my pockets each time I board a Eurostar. Your sacrifice would be remembered each time I visit the Continent.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:20, Reply)
I'm a Susan
but call myself Sue, as do most people. My brother calls me Poo.
I HATE being called Susie.
(I helped save b3ta! Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:15, Reply)
Poo?
Classic :) I can sympathise with not liking being called Susie, though...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:30, Reply)
DG works fine for me.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:16, Reply)
DG is good :)

(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:47, Reply)
This is starting to read like group therapy
"Hi, I'm Murgatroyd and..."
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:22, Reply)
"...someone set a bomb under the toilet at my house, but fortunately my partner saved me."

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:26, Reply)
"But too late to stop third degree burns on my...."
.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:28, Reply)
"mother".

(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:29, Reply)
"Who was jolly cross and said..."
.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:31, Reply)
"get up them stairs
and wait till your father comes home!"
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:32, Reply)
"I can't wait" was the reply.

(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:44, Reply)
"I do so love a good beating!"

(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:46, Reply)
I'm entirely lost right now
:(
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:58, Reply)
"Why would my son possibly want to be beaten?"

(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:01, Reply)
"Because he can't afford a chiropractor."

(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:02, Reply)
*embolisms*

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:07, Reply)
Oh, don't do that.
That's going to be a bastard to clean up...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:07, Reply)
I got stuck with Alex Palex for much of my childhood
there was a song

Person 1 - "Whats his name?"
Chorus of people - "Alex Palex!"
Person 1 - "Thats his name!"
Chorus of people - "Alex Palex!"

Repeated whenever I entered a room, or said something..... or existed.
(I helped save b3ta! Nostrebor can't be everything all the time., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:22, Reply)
What's his name?

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:26, Reply)
Slim Shady!

(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:32, Reply)
The real Slim Shady?

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:43, Reply)
It's only the real Slim Shady if he's standing up

(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:44, Reply)
MINDPISS

(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:45, Reply)
Wow! A simu-post
How was it for you dear?
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:49, Reply)
Bouncy.
:)
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:50, Reply)
I knew using space hoppers was a good idea.
;D
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:11, Reply)
I want one of those.
To bounce around my flat in, mainly.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:16, Reply)
Ask him to stand up
and then we'll find out...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:45, Reply)
If I had a penny for every time someone sang the Beatles song every time they heard my name.
I'd be able to afford a Honda Accord.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:33, Reply)
And run them over with it
because that's got to get annoying after a while?
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:45, Reply)
.
Is that the tune-name association or the Honda Accord meme?
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:50, Reply)
Bit of both really.
I'm just glad there are no songs with my name...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:54, Reply)
I can't think of a song with my name
but there is a film-title with my name.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:03, Reply)
The only one I can think of with mine
is horrendously depressing.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:05, Reply)
There probably is
You've moaned about this but you've not actually come clean and told us what your name actually is.

Tell us, and I'll probably be able to find a song and that'll be your life several ounces poorer.

EDIT - That was aimed at Maladicta. Male names in songs are rarer, largely because Bacharach and David were both straight.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:05, Reply)
That's true - I haven't; I always just assume I've posted it at some point and then WTF when
I realise no one knows it. I be a Sophie.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:08, Reply)
Hey hey - look over there! At that thing!
Sorry - trying to distract you. Can't think of any Sophie songs.
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:11, Reply)
I r winrar!

(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:16, Reply)
Before I told any b3tans my real name
somebody posted a QOTW answer where the main character had the same name as me (spelled the same way too). I had to do a double-take.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:34, Reply)
I'd hate to be called
"The Walrus". That'd really suck.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:51, Reply)
Hey Mickey you're so fine you're so fine you blow my mind hey Mickey
*clapclap clap*
Hey Mickey!
*clapclap clap*
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:52, Reply)
hey, ya reckon if I left out a gift of honey and porridge a Brownie will clean my room while I'm on vacation?

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:39, Reply)
If you're really lucky
some woodland creatures will do it.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:46, Reply)
haha I reckon something'd end up in there, alright

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:47, Reply)
They might flutter around gaily and pin your curtains back and stuff.
All to a floaty "ah-ah-ah" tune.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:48, Reply)
I have no curtains :(
Only blinds, still, that shit would be SO CASH
*sigh*

I'd love to see something like that happen
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:52, Reply)
Shit would indeed be SO CASH.
I'd love a crack team of woodland creature interior designers to do something worthwhile with my bedroom at the moment...
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:55, Reply)
I've just read an arseload of shit (SO CASH) on wikipedia about faeries
I quite like the idea of the huldra
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:01, Reply)
*googles*
I want to be one of those. With the tail.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:03, Reply)
The only creatures that ended up doing that to my old place were mosquitoes
And they were utterly rubbish at doing it.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 20:56, Reply)
cunt mosquitos
I hope you kicked them right out on their ear
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:01, Reply)
I didn't even kick them out
I just turned them inside out through their ear.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:16, Reply)
The bluebottles used to fly at my striplight in Switzerland
and then get caught inside the mesh and buzz themselves to death. Not nice.
(I helped save b3ta! Maladicta, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:04, Reply)
Mosquitos certainly have a way with drapery

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:09, Reply)
They certainly do
Those blood-stains are a right bastard to clean.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:14, Reply)
even worse than the back-seat of a '64 Buick-6...
or so i'm told...
(I helped save b3ta! blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:32, Reply)
You transport mosquitoes in your Buick?

(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:37, Reply)
The '64 Buick fat bastard
Was renowned for it's mosquito transportation capabilities.

Second only to the '72 Cadillac Nixonliar, I'd say...
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:42, Reply)
hoost tha jaarn on marra?
fettle like?
(I helped save b3ta! blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:46, Reply)
Reet sharp Marra
How's tha?
(I helped save b3ta! The Disappointed Caravanner of the year, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:47, Reply)
*slips out of dialect*
fucked, mate.
meds.
stressing.
trying not to go "grrrrrr" so to speak...
(I helped save b3ta! blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 22:01, Reply)
err...why yes, officer underpants!
that's right, errr live mosquitoes, yeah, live...
nothing dead in there...
(I helped save b3ta! blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:44, Reply)
That's Superhero Underpants to you.
As long as you weren't heading towards any residential areas I won't arrest you for illicit mosquito transport.
(I helped save b3ta! mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Thu 13 Aug 2009, 21:54, Reply)
what was the question?
i'm buggered mate!
(I helped save b3ta! blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Thu 13 Aug 2009, 22:12, Reply)

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