I ate a full trifle earlier
and I wish I hadn't

How have you been a greedy cunt recently?
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 14:48, 65 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

yesterday I ate about three people's worth of roast beef dinner
drank 3 bottles of £11.99 Malbec (between 2, I had 2 of the bottles myself) and ate a quarter of an apple pie with custard afterwards. I then had a large XO brandy and felt most unwell.


Will that do?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 14:58, Reply)

I started two threads because I'm desperate for attention.
oh no, that was you.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 14:59, Reply)

I was making up
for doing something more worthwhile yesterday. It's nice that you missed me.

Besides, my ploy worked though
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:02, Reply)

hey, I started two threads
does that make me desperate for attention?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:04, Reply)

No it makes you smug

(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:04, Reply)

He had it coming.

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:05, Reply)

quiet you

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:06, Reply)

*Gurns*

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:08, Reply)

He does grumpy in such a wonderfully smug way doesn't he.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:11, Reply)

Yup
That's why he's Captain Smug!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:13, Reply)

admiral smug, thank you very much
for added smugness: I've just been given a pair of basically unused monitor speakers
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:14, Reply)

*salutes*
Sir.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:17, Reply)

I ate masses of pork from the hog roast on Saturday
and followed it up with yet more pork, some ribs and some chicken. Then I had some cake. Then I had some profiteroles. Then I had two bottles of red wine.

I don't have a problem though, I can stop anytime I like. It's not like I need peer supported psychotherapy or anything.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:04, Reply)

Are you sure??

(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:05, Reply)

Ask me two more times.

(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:05, Reply)

no

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:06, Reply)

I can't believe I haven't done this yet
Whoops, done it as a link instead
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:09, Reply)

hahaha
I was wondering when someone would do that
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:11, Reply)

It's well overdue
apologies for crudeness.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:11, Reply)

it is indeed
I was expecting it within the first week.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:12, Reply)

Hehe
You know I very nearly did but wasn't sure if anyone would remember that!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:06, Reply)

.
I ate a full chicken from Tesco.

Bought two big rolls, buttered them, and had hot roast chicken sandwiches. After polishing off the chicken, I felt rather unwell for about 7 hours!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:30, Reply)

One of my favorite meals is to get a roast chicken.
And demoloshing it with as many condiments as I can get my hands on.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:46, Reply)

.
I can't find a condiment to fit, as I feel it takes away from the chickeny goodness.

Just heavily buttered rolls, that's all I go for.

Any suggestions? (Apart from stuffing, not a possible option for work)
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:53, Reply)

this
www.mysupermarket.co.uk/tesco-price-comparison/Mayonnaise_And_Dressings/Branston_Lemon_And_Garlic_Mayonnaise_295ml.html

it's amazing with a hot roast chicken sandwich

or sweet chilli sauce
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:59, Reply)

HOW COULD I HAVE FORGOTEN THE SWEET CHILLI ?!?!?!
But yeah', that mixed up with mayo, it's great.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:01, Reply)

like coleslaw?
mix in a bit of sweet chilli sauce.

awesomeness.

I still maintain that branston's lemon and garlic mayo is the best thing you could put in a roast chicken sandwich.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:02, Reply)

I've not thought of doing that before, but I can see it working.
Calslaw counts as a condiment, because sour kraut does.

I like lots of raisens in my caslaw.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:08, Reply)

NO!
raisins and sultanas etc. should be forbidden for being in savoury food
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:11, Reply)

I only like them in savory foods.
I fancy that curry with the lychees in it now.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:20, Reply)

correct
this is also true of almond flakes and banana. Get out of my curry, you Mughlai wankers!
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 17:00, Reply)

bananas can just fuck off full stop.
almond flakes I don't have a problem with.

Dhansak is the curry for me though
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 17:01, Reply)

LOADS !
Ketchup and mayo
BBQ Sauce
Chili'n'tomarto chuckney
Sweetcorn Relish
Branston Pickle
Verious flavoured crisps (they count in this sinario)
Any jar of pickles (as in, chucnkey type pickle, rather than pickled vegtables) that takes your fancy.
Any jar of pickles (as in, vegtables type pickle, rather than chukneys) that takes your fancy.
Chopped up onion.
Pick up a handfull of Sweet'n'Sours sauces from McDonalds (or their Curry)


Stuffing doesn't count as you have to cook that.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:00, Reply)

.
Mayo is not an option, as I think it's utterly vile.

However, the sweet chilli is definitely one I will consider for the future!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 17:01, Reply)

got pissed up on booze
on thursday as i had the day off on friday....smoked a fair bit of some nice bud called 'cheese', too much actually....went into kitchen, made 2 toasts with pate, then i made a a huge bowl of rice noodles with curry sauce, that were still al dente. the a bowl of Clusters for dessert, and a few biccies and cheese, and a bag of crisps... Went to bed, then woke with a start 4 hours later, 'Doing a Gately'.

Vomit was rushing to escape as i rushed to the toilet. One barf was contained, but the second barf, just 2 steps from the toilet bowl, found a semblance of freedom out of my nose. Things started to go in slow motion as i attempted a modicum of decorum and tried to lift the toilet seat, but mistakenly put the lid down. This split second mistake was the difference between, mess and no mess. The toilet lid was brown with runny stomach stew, i flipped the lid up and heaved what seemed like several gallons of stinking brown effluence into the bog pan.. I didn't even dare put the light on to review my handywork. I flushed my shame away.

Reeling and picking bits of noodle out my teeth, i put the lid back down to reveal a curried Jackson Pollok leering back at me. I wasn't fussed, because the thought of having to clean up what i had just expelled into the toilet did not bear thinking about.

Drunk + fat bastard = regret
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:31, Reply)

Great stuff.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:48, Reply)

that cheese is pokey weed for sure
I have also smoked 'blue cheese'. It's all a bit silly, isn't it?


EDIT and that was a beautifully-told anecdote that perfectly captured the essence of the 'panic chunder'. Good work
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:04, Reply)

ha
yes, it is a bit silly. silly and expensive, but when it's as good as that, they can call it whatever they like!

I would love to get a hold of a nice bit of solid, some afghani black or some temple ball.

Watched a great program on Teachers TV on Saturday, Drugs and the Brain, it was about cannabis, excellent program. I came away from it with, more knowledge about smoke than when it started and an overwhelming desire for a joint. Apparently your brain comes pre-loaded with receptors for cannibinoids
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:10, Reply)

I had some squidgy afghani stuff the other night
it was a nice change from the green, but not that nice ;-)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:12, Reply)

Aha
I have access to Afghan black, Manali charas and some blond Moroccan at the moment - and that's just the hash. There's also Swazi bush, some generic skunk and some Jamaican.

It's frankly ridiculous
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:17, Reply)

we can mostly get hold of generic skunk, albeit of a pretty decent quality
I'm not a connoisseur, I just like to smoke loads of it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:19, Reply)

I suppose I'm a bit of both
A friend of a friend developed his own strain of bud called ESP - if you ever get offered it, buy all that your dealer has. It is fucking beautiful - totally unique in aroma, akin to church incense more than weed, tastes fantastic and with the most wonderful high. I think it was a Cannabis Cup entrant one year.
Should've won, in my opinion.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:23, Reply)

nice
I fully support No3L's notion that we all get together with music and pot and kill a weekend btw
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:24, Reply)

It's an excellent idea

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:28, Reply)

i concur,
not sure if the missus would sanction a drug fuelled weekend away with bearded internet strangers though ;-)
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:29, Reply)

what is there to disapprove of?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:30, Reply)

that DOES sound a trifle iffy
when you put it like that
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:30, Reply)

mmmm
i'm a willing test subject incidentally!

You're cup truly runneth over with all that loveliness. i can only get bud from a friend in england who jiffy bags the stuff up to me. But it is well pricey...the cheese was £100 for a half oz. I have had the Charas before from the legendary BUDMONKEY, website, if anyone remembers that?

The Charas was really nice...sometimes its nice to get stoned without a white knuckle, THC fuelled 'ride with the devil'. just sometimes though ;-)
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:28, Reply)

You'd have thought
that the UK home growing boom would have sent prices plummeting but it seems not, eh? Very disappointing....
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:32, Reply)

I've noticed a slight rise in price recently
it's been £20 per eighth pretty consistently for years (down here at least) and has snuck up to £25 again recently. with not much discount for bulk
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:38, Reply)

absolutely,
i take it the prices down your way are 'high' as well and i'm not being ripped off?
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:40, Reply)

sadly this is correct
My main source is close to 'importer level' so you'd think I'd get it for bugger all, but you'd be wrong, sadly.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 17:12, Reply)

it's an outrage
my main source is only bloody emigrating to Australia in a few months. A mutual friend is taking over apparently....
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 17:21, Reply)

I'm trying to stop my fat bastard ways
but Krispy Kreme aren't helping! You can now get 15 plain doughnuts for the price of 12 - arses! :(
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:38, Reply)

I can't afford them durring the current credit crunch.
I really want a doughnut now.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:45, Reply)

You can now!
15 for the price of 12!! :D

I agree, they are rather expensive, but I just love them so much!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:52, Reply)

I don't deserve Krispy Kreams.
I'm not cool or hip enough, and I live to far from anywhere I could get one, it's an entire bus ride away (I don't deserve a car eaither).

I shall have to consol myself with an asda one, or maybe gregs if it's a national holiday. They're the only things greggs does right.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:56, Reply)

If you can bear it,
Have another look in your Tesco Gonz. A lot of them have handy Krispy Kreme cabinets in them now....
(Pirate Monkey is not the goddamn Batman, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:17, Reply)

Woop
That's where I get mine. There is a cabinet in a Tesco Metro near where I work!! :D
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:21, Reply)

Wait a sec, hold on one gosh darn minuite here....
/ac

A krispy kream stand in a _metro_ ? This inspires hope.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:23, Reply)

Yup
Its on Holborn Viaduct, I think they have a little cabinet there because there is a Krispy Kreme shop up off Holborn, so they make deliveries quite a bit - I know too much about this don't I! :(
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:38, Reply)

They only do that in the good ones.
My tesco is a huge disapointment in my life, it's only good for £1 cans of relentless, and that's it.

Sushi? Shit.
Sandwiches? Shit.
in-store-baked-goods? OK, not great, but ok. Greggs next door is better.
Harribo? Shit
Condiments? Medioca at best.
Microwaved Goods? Shit
Meat'n'stuff? shit.

God, I wish they get brought out by budgins and budgin's latest up market changes.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:22, Reply)

I've been desperately trying to get healthy
I've been going out running the past 6 weeks or so plus football and everything.

But come 10pm I always get really hungry. Normally something like a cheese and tomato sandwich, or some sardines on toast almost qualifies as being reasonably healthy for a late supper. But last night I had a Rustlers Burger. It was horrible but hit the spot :(
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 15:52, Reply)

the problem with exercise
is that it makes you doubly hungry. Bit of a downside if the reason you're doing it is because you like eating too much.

I know this to be true.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 12 Oct 2009, 16:07, Reply)

It's a shame Edmund isn't available
to regail us with tales of his hilarious collection of wives.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Mon 12 Oct 2009, 17:13, Reply)