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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(

rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)

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I am in the car sitting outside my house like a cut-price stalker
Because I've locked myself out. I also have new red hair. What should I do until I'm rescued?
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:48, 95 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Go to the pub?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:49, Reply)

Have no money because of lovely red hair. :(

(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:55, Reply)

See my answer for the solution

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:55, Reply)

That's how she's going to pay the locksmith.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:57, Reply)

HAVE A WANK!

(

Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:51, Reply)

Dare I say it but
Not really in the mood *shameface*
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:57, Reply)

I don't understand women.

(

Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:59, Reply)

I could help you understand us.
I just need lots of vodka and some electrodes.
(

girlinthehole, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:00, Reply)

That's your answer to everything, isn't it.

(

girlinthehole, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:58, Reply)

And?

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:00, Reply)

Find somewhere outside your house that would be good for hiding a spare key.

(

girlinthehole, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:51, Reply)

How long do you have?

(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:52, Reply)

About half an hour maybe longer.

(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:59, Reply)

I would just sing if I were you
Write a song and sing it
(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:00, Reply)

Erm!
MTFU.
(

girlinthehole, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:01, Reply)

Yes but I wanted to share!
And make you all reconsider your belief that I live a sparkly jet set life.
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:07, Reply)

Well you've never fooled me : )

(

girlinthehole, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:08, Reply)

Damn
Must try harder
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:11, Reply)

Turn some tricks
might as well be making money while you've nothing else to do.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:52, Reply)

They'd have to be magic tricks
I'm in the middle of nowhere and it's too early for dogging trade.
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:01, Reply)

Get your tits out

(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:52, Reply)

They're already out.
On the birdtable.
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:02, Reply)

POIDH
Let's see this red hair then.
(

The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:53, Reply)

Once i'm inside i might be able to do that but i've no idea how to while on my phone.

(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:03, Reply)

Park in your neighbour's driveway
and stare into their living room. If they confront you, act all confused and mutter something about knives.
(

Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:54, Reply)

I'm seriously considering this one
But none of my neighbours are home
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:13, Reply)

Learn both the words, and the actions
To Rolf Harris song 'The Court of King Caractacus'
(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:55, Reply)

Cry

(

SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:55, Reply)

I do have a weepy eye at the moment
Something got in it
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:10, Reply)

*inserts semen joke*
(

girlinthehole, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:12, Reply)

He does have a lousy aim

(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:14, Reply)

Hahaha!
You need to paint a bullseye on your chest.
(

girlinthehole, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:16, Reply)

Around here
that would get me shot.
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:21, Reply)

Learn a new language.

(

girlinthehole, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:55, Reply)

Barcode would be a good one

(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:56, Reply)

Pretend to be a private detective...
...face your house and do the 'thumbs to index finger' binoocular thing. Whenever anyone sees you doing this slump down in the seat - or even better drive off at high speed with maximum tyre screeching.

Failing that I agree with the 'have a wank' option.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:57, Reply)

Pretend to be a burglar
and break in.
(

SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:58, Reply)

You should carry out covert survelliance on your log shed.
Maybe add a few traps.
(

crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 14:59, Reply)

This is an excellent idea.

(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:05, Reply)

While whistling the theme tune to Mission Impossible.

(

girlinthehole, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:08, Reply)

....
...in the nude.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:09, Reply)

That goes without saying

(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:15, Reply)

Do freeze modeling in various positions outside

(

Lisette von Falcon, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:08, Reply)

Invade Poland.

(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:12, Reply)

bindun.
I don't think you could catch them out twice.
(

girlinthehole, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:12, Reply)

Yeah but not recently
I reckon they've probably forgotten about last time by now
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:14, Reply)

*racist comment about plumbers*

(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:19, Reply)

^ BEST ANSWER

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:13, Reply)

Pretend to be...
...your long lost identical twin. Bang on the door for 10 minutes and scream some gibberish about wanting your share of the inheritance before throwing a brick through your window.

Bonus points if you do it on your next door neighbours house rather than your own.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:14, Reply)

Have a one woman journey cover band in your front lawn

(

Lisette von Falcon, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:23, Reply)

THIS WINS!

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:27, Reply)

I want to do this
But I've no idea what songs are theirs. 'I want to know what love is'? Is that theirs?
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:29, Reply)

Just a small town girl
livin' in a lone-ly world..
(

Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:30, Reply)

She took the midnight train goin'
anyyyyy-where...
(

Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:33, Reply)

Just a small town boy
born and raised in south detroit...
(

Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:34, Reply)

He took the midnight train goin'
anyyyywhere...
(

Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:34, Reply)

*keyboard synth*
Street lights... something something something something
(

Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:35, Reply)

People! Living just to find emotion!

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:37, Reply)

Don't stop
be-lievin'
(

Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:39, Reply)

Hold on to your DREEEEEEEEEEEEAMS

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:41, Reply)

Oh why did you have to start singing that
I feel all sad and lonely now
(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:37, Reply)

That was Foreigner
you FOOL!
(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:32, Reply)

Bugger
If only it'd been a Spandau Ballet track
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:35, Reply)

So true...

(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:36, Reply)

Virgin

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:37, Reply)

Ha.
Ha..ha.Haaa..haaaaaaaaa!
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:45, Reply)

It would have been GOLD!

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:37, Reply)

Haha
You and Roota are ace
(

Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:37, Reply)

You, unfortunately, are a massive cunt.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:38, Reply)

Of the highest possible order
*doffs ten gallon hat*
*toots pipe*
(

Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:39, Reply)

Are you being sarky?
Or am I ace?
(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:39, Reply)

How big are your tits?

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:41, Reply)

Disproportionately big

(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:42, Reply)

You can be ace then

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:45, Reply)

Go'ead!!

(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:48, Reply)

POIDH

(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Sun 15 Nov 2009, 17:22, Reply)

I vote ACE

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:42, Reply)

Yay!
Hold on, is ACE an acronym?
(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:44, Reply)

A Cacky Embryo?
Alien Charlie Excreta?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:46, Reply)

No, you are ace

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:48, Reply)

You're ace!

(

Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:45, Reply)

Oh man, I'm so going to dance in slow motion
whilst swirling a chiffon scarf around my head
(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:46, Reply)

He said you were ace
not pans people.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:46, Reply)

or Stevie bastard Nicks

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:47, Reply)

Fuck dem bitches
I'm from the Brian Rogers Connection...
(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:48, Reply)

BRC Niggaz for LIFE yo
*rolls up trouser leg*
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:49, Reply)

*dances to Maniac by Michael Sembello*

(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:51, Reply)

Fucking awesome song

(Bazongaloid, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:51, Reply)

I'm proper running on the spot Al

(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:53, Reply)

My neighbour has arrived home
But he's a big scary bloke with a rottweiler and so's his wife.
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:43, Reply)

Hold on
is his wife a bloke or a rottweiler?
(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:44, Reply)

*whispers*
I'm not sure
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:48, Reply)

Pretend to look in your bag for something
Don't have eye contact
(

Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:49, Reply)

So, are you planning on spending the whole weekend in the car?
Its what I'd end up doing. Just sucking on the end of my scarf, looking forlornly out of the misted up window, posting to B3TA, slowly wasting away due to embarrassment.
(Spleep Shit, or get off the internet., Fri 13 Nov 2009, 15:56, Reply)

I'M IN!
Now I'm going to catch up on all the work I haven't done this afternoon*

*watch Grey's Anatomy that I downloaded last night
(

chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 13 Nov 2009, 16:04, Reply)

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