Anyone fancy getting married?
State your best case for me to choose you.

Naked pictures acceptable.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:19, 76 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

ive had a couple of half-hearted proposals but this takes the biscuit
but no ta, im off men this year MEN ARE THE DEVIL.
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:22, Reply)

I mean, what she said ^
Grrr yeah.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:25, Reply)

im fucking watching you

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:26, Reply)

Men *spits*
See!!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:33, Reply)

Easy Rosie !
I got a present for you that I found in the attic !
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:26, Reply)

wey hey! its not one of them roody mags is it?

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:27, Reply)

Hah, nah', you'll LOVE it.
It's probably proper vintage, or slightly creepy, depending on what story I make up to go with it.

I got this thing with old shit I know nothing about, I make up my own stories, they're normally more fun than the real ones.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:28, Reply)

It's a jazz mag

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:29, Reply)

a ye olde one
with naked fat lasses riding pennyfuckingfarthings in it and shit
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:31, Reply)

and mandrills

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:33, Reply)

steampunk porn
brass fittings and sexy cogs
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:34, Reply)

a coiled spring dangling seductively from each greased up tit

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:35, Reply)

im not going up there, spiders and shit dwell in attics
dont tell me dont tell me i'll be round on thursday and it'll be a surprise
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:30, Reply)

It's a propper room, with floorboards and a train track and EVERYTHING.
But I'll understand if you just poke your head through, the ladder is a bit of a bitch to get down on if you're not used to them.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:41, Reply)

nah fuck all that, i think i'll watch a bit of telly or summat

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:45, Reply)

Can't do it with this one =(

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:05, Reply)

Because I am really fun to be around
and I already have lots of stuff, so when we get divorced and split the presents, you can have the food processor and pans if I can have the fancy cutlery.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:24, Reply)

OI! SISTERHOOD! WE'RE LAYING OFF THE MEN REMEMBER

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:25, Reply)

It's ok I've remembered now :(

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:30, Reply)

Dibs on the Tefal ActiFry.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:27, Reply)

you wont need one of them when youre married, its customary to let yourself go and that
she'll stop shaving her minge and you'll put a few fucking stone on
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:28, Reply)

I will do this.
For sure. I stink right now.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:30, Reply)

just rub yourself down with a vinegar soaked rag on a stick, job fucking done

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:31, Reply)

Mmmmm
Fresh as a daisy
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:33, Reply)

Yeah', but you gotta watch the frying pan, and I want my dinner on the plate at 7:30, and not a minute later... and I ain't missin' 'ollyoaks.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:31, Reply)

i dunno what youre telling me for, im fucked if im joining you

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:33, Reply)

You could be his mistress
a husband needs a mistress.
Someone's gotta have sex with him
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:34, Reply)

this is where i stop loving you

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:36, Reply)

ALright, I'll sleep with him
you can do the housework
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:37, Reply)

he's got a woman for that you know
gosh i guess i'll just have to stay in my lovely flat with my quiet neighbours and double bed with memory mattress and heating on all year round and that

:(((((((
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:40, Reply)

Fancy a bit of extra-marital?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:41, Reply)

just ditch the cunt and come live with me

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:42, Reply)

Woo!
We can wear kneestickles and watch Poirot in the tropical heat of your flat.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:47, Reply)

we will never need OUT again!

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:52, Reply)

Right, I'm just going to get a bath
I was going to offer to leave you my water, but seeing as you have constant hot water there's no need.
I'll know this joy too when I live in That London with you.

Miss you already!!

SORRY GONZ, I'M BACK ON THE MINGE
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:54, Reply)

LOVE YOU MISS YOU XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:56, Reply)

Can I just say, now this subthread has concluded, that it contains EVERYTHING I could possibly want in a subthread.
Good work girls !
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 18:00, Reply)

With complimentary indian man standing outside on the front lawn holding a boombox playing "Bleeding Love" at full volumn.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:42, Reply)

haha yer but you have to live with mongs
i get to mince around, leaving piles of clothes where they fall, playing the ps3 in my pants on the sofa or on the toilet or anywhere i like really.

gutttttttted
( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:44, Reply)

Mong 1 on the way, Mong 2 with a foot out the door.
Monggyness of 3&4 are yet to be determined.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:50, Reply)

everyones a mong, its where you pick them up from ;)

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:52, Reply)

So you only need to be told once? PERFECT !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:39, Reply)

I've got a really soft beard
I can cook well, and I can teach you to play that wonderwall song, or that time of your life one
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:26, Reply)

You're at least getting a spot on the band, maybe lead drummest or something like that.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:32, Reply)

my drumming leaves a lot to be desired
just letting you know
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:32, Reply)

I can turn the Rockband down to 'easy'.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:37, Reply)

oneistinny

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:05, Reply)

This

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:04, Reply)

I'm very clean.
Very clean indeed.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:32, Reply)

= got no skin
Gonz, he's like Howard Fucking Hughes
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:35, Reply)

He's got a dog though, it's a bonus.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:37, Reply)

My mum's friends have just got a pug called Elvis

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:38, Reply)

I think I just wet myself a little bit with the thought of that.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:39, Reply)

I haven't met him yet
I've asked if I could. I babysat the kids and they're grown up now, so I think I deserve to meet Elvis, even if I haven't seen any of the family for years.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:40, Reply)

Seems only fair.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:42, Reply)

Last one on this mound.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:04, Reply)

you idiot

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:09, Reply)

OHBOY !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:04, Reply)

Deffo !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:04, Reply)

Dayum

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:04, Reply)

Me too !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:03, Reply)

I'm better than Superman. He's just a cunt.... in underpants.
I'd like to tell you what a wonderful person you are. But that would make me a septic gash of a cunt who quite frankly had no concept of right or wrong.

I'd rather peel off my skin and bathe my weeping raw flesh in a bath of vinegar than spend any time with you. But that's just my opinion. Don't take it personally.

You know, you're not some precious flower. And if you were I'd be a weed and grow next to you and choke you to fucking death!... Love you!

Now fuck off and let me bask in the glory of being me.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:35, Reply)

Haha, edgy AND cool !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:39, Reply)

By the way, washing in rose water doesn't stop you smelling like a piece of shit.
Since when did my underwear look good on you? Take it off. Take it off your face.

Wait... wait... I know what it feels like to be like you: Shit.

I've got two things to say to you: fuck and off. Capish?

Well if I'm the douchebag, you're the contents, Titfuck!

Yah, I can't believe in God when I'm THIS good. I've got a badger, a dog, a cat, and a sack. Now that I've got 'em you can fuck off. All mine.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:47, Reply)

Oh man, such harsh words !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:52, Reply)

I love you! No I didn't say it I didn't say it I didn't say it. I coughed.... MMM-hmmm, coughed.
My brother calls you a cunt. Not me. I didn't do it. My BROTHER did.

Elephant trunks should be used for elephant things only. Nothing else.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sat 9 Jan 2010, 17:58, Reply)

I don't really think I can be friends with someone who threatens to throw a puppy and kitten into a sack, then drop them from a fifty footbridge, only to realise it's low tide and there is no water.
And then thinks to themselves "Oh well, they're dead, nothing I can do", but they're not dead, they could survive as you whistle your marry song down the road, nobody else can hear the crys from the poor kitten and puppies, nobody can hear their pleeds, as pain turns to hunger and hunger turns back to pain, eventually leading to a prolonged agonising death.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 18:07, Reply)

Finished !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:03, Reply)

Ok then

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:03, Reply)

yay

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:03, Reply)

REally

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 19:03, Reply)

I'm disease-free
and willing to travel
(Fancy a weekend on my Raymondo Luxury Yacht?, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 18:07, Reply)

Well, it's a good thing one of us is !

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 18:29, Reply)

I have big boobies and an ass that just won't stop.
Oh and I have good organisational skills.
( girlinthehole, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 21:14, Reply)

I went out and got pissed, so didn't have time to validate, but this is definatly a good option.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sat 9 Jan 2010, 23:51, Reply)

I figured it might be.

( girlinthehole, Sun 10 Jan 2010, 8:59, Reply)