"Second British Haiti death confirmed"
Shit guys, it's twice as bad as we thought!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 13:46, 75 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Did they contribute money toward the earthquake?
Because if they didn't I'm afraid I just don't care. Not that I'm suggesting they should be in line for special treatment if they did contribute of course.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 13:50, Reply)

I must admit this Haiti business is upsetting me.
There's a donation notice in my bank with a pic of a little Haitian boy all dusty and bloodied and he reminds me of my nephew and it makes me sad.

It's at times like this I wish I was a nurse or fireman instead of a bloody pen pusher.
( girlinthehole, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 13:53, Reply)

I try and cheer myself with the fact that it's slightly possible that some of my work will prevent someone's house being flooded

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:01, Reply)

I take lots of comfort in the fact that I paid £200 to the DEC emergency appeal
of a colleagues money.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:06, Reply)

"Second British Haiti death confirmed"
Because, like, the thousands of Haittan deaths don't matter any more.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:01, Reply)

Two hundred thousand people died
Which is roughly 55 or so times the number of people killed when the planes hit the world trade centre.

Just imagine, if the US spent half as much money as they have on the wars in Iraq and Afgahnistan on helping to rebuild Haiti.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:09, Reply)

Well, they have only mattered since they had their earthquake.
Before that they were chopping each other up in a brutal civil war, ravaged by AIDS, poverty and drug cartels. No one gave a fuck then.

If only the Democratic Republic of Congo had an earthquake, we might then care about them.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:10, Reply)

Somalia needs one too.

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:35, Reply)

Man made disasters = Acceptable, ignore and continue
Natural disasters = Opportunity to look good, phone Bono, NOW
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:39, Reply)

Haiti is my favorite reference point right now...that's terrible, but it's true
my housemate's nephew is a smart mouth little shit, last night he got nasty with his mum because he had to wait a few minutes for her to cut his steak so I made sure he understood that three million people in haiti are starving and would be more than happy to wait a moment or two for a steak.
( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:02, Reply)

Well done, Haiti Lady, you've woken up a crackhead!"
And I'm doing my bit tonight.
But I'll request that my money and time only benefits the two british families.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:04, Reply)

Hey, I like your icon. Is it new?
*plays with collar*
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:09, Reply)

Why yes, yes it is.
Thanks for noticing.
Did I ever tell you that this here icon represents a symbol of my individuality, and my belief in personal freedom?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:12, Reply)

I'm going to moan about you
because, like, I can.

That should be a slogan - you can with an icon.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

i-can
My i-can is a ghost. Etc.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:18, Reply)

Are you trying to get into my pants?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:17, Reply)

I'm a ghost.
I could do that without you knowing.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:18, Reply)

*shivers*

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:19, Reply)

^^ *shrinks* ^^

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:20, Reply)

*haunts*

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:25, Reply)

When I win the lottery.
Me and Roota are going to live in Haiti and help them re-build their lives.

Roota will start a small travelling library and I will help them fill in forms to be re-housed.
( girlinthehole, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:11, Reply)

Surely it would be better for Roota to run a small travelling Deli counter
otherwise you're wasting her existing talents. I mean, how would a ham slicer know how to run a library?
(Bazongaloid, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:12, Reply)

slicer toucher
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:15, Reply)

Eh fuck off right!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

*ham-slicer*
Prouds.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

better start learning creole now

( Lisette von Falcon, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:13, Reply)

But when they get inside the mobile library...
They will realise that it is actually 'BGB & Roota's Mobile Cabaret Fun-shack'.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:14, Reply)

Hooray!
*gets out accordian*
( girlinthehole, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:15, Reply)

Hooray!
*gets out... hmpf, harmonica*
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:17, Reply)

*doffs boater*

*cranks phonograph and rocks out to charleston*
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:16, Reply)

*twirls pearls*

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:17, Reply)

nice pearl necklace

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:18, Reply)

Thanks

I have the aim of an excocet spunk missle
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:18, Reply)

hopefully not one fired by americans
I don't want your "friendly" fire
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:20, Reply)

*Bukkakaes civilians*

I'm going to have to up my zinc intake at this rate
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:25, Reply)

start eating sunblock

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:28, Reply)

I asked the doctor if there was an oral sunblock right, but he said no
SURELY there is a drug that you can take that makes your skin sunproof???
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:30, Reply)

did you actually ask that?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:31, Reply)

Yes
He said no.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:34, Reply)

did he laugh you out of the surgery?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:36, Reply)

i think it;s a reasonable question.
Ok, it would appear that it's not yet been invented, but still.
I'm fed up of being covered in grease all summer.
And if I don't do it, I get ill. And I get burnt. And I get eyelids like Big Bird, oh my god I fucking do as well right hahahaha!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:38, Reply)

Wear a burka

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:40, Reply)

D'you know what Ape,
I'd love to.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:41, Reply)

We could fashion one out of shell suit material for you

just stay away from naked flames, ok?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:42, Reply)

Wouldn't that be a bit sweaty?
A nice cheescloth one would be ace ta.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:43, Reply)

Airtex perhaps

with eye and bum windows
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:45, Reply)

I'll take it.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:46, Reply)

that doesn't sound fun
I burn quite a lot too, but it seems to happen at random. usually when it is cloudy
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:41, Reply)

And you call ME odd...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:43, Reply)

I always wonder why I can't just take a melonin supplement

to get the crunkcore orange glow I so desire
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:35, Reply)

I like this.
Sexocetlolz.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:21, Reply)

Dirty gitz, lot of yez

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:23, Reply)

Youse love it.
*waggles eyebrows*
( girlinthehole, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:25, Reply)

but that one wasn't my fault, was it Beebiejeebie?
I mean, it's normally my fault cos I'm all sauce and no trousers, but that wasn't me was it? It was them wasn't it?

And yeah, I do *charlestons*
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:27, Reply)

you provoke it
normally I am chaste and virtuous in my banter, but you elicit sordidness from everyone around you
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:28, Reply)

True dat.

( girlinthehole, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:29, Reply)

I know that, but how comes it happens even when I'm not doing it?
That means I have no control over it.
I'm going to have to pay somebody to follow me round with a slide whistle.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:32, Reply)

You came on B3ta and shook everyone up with your cheeky scouseness.
Now we're all cheeky little buggers, and rude with it.
( girlinthehole, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:37, Reply)

I'm not taking the blame
This place already had undertones of smut when I arrived.
It's like a knocking shop.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:39, Reply)

Lets blame the scouser

I remeber when all this were philosophical debate and ideas for charity fundraisers
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:40, Reply)

I never took the collection!
You can check my bag!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:42, Reply)

Was it you that was involved in the 8 year old party hokey cokey

of cum thread?!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:34, Reply)

Not fucking guilty yer onner!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:34, Reply)

They should listen to more crunkcore

that would cheer the blighters up
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:18, Reply)

if I get my hands on that pair of twats

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:28, Reply)

Crunkcore
That word hurts my eyes :0(
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:42, Reply)

hurts your eyes

but spunks thick globules of musical mastery into your ears
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:46, Reply)

I think it's likely to make me cry
Warm, salty tears while whistfully remembering the days when music was good.
( SpikeyPickle wishes he was mabazaritchie, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:50, Reply)

IN YOUR FACE VIPROS!!!
They're currently doing clinical trials on drugs that improve resistance to UV.

So I'm not barking mad am I???
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 14:57, Reply)

I can't imagine those being good for you

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 15:06, Reply)

Tell that to your lungs, chonger!
I'm first in the queue.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 15:08, Reply)

touché

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 15:12, Reply)

away!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 15:17, Reply)

As if this wan't bad enough...
...but the Fugees are thinking of reforming to raise money for victims.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 16:50, Reply)

Good God NO!
At least that talentless DNA waste Wyclef could mumble "One Brit, Two Brits".
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Fri 29 Jan 2010, 17:00, Reply)