Four more hours for Thatcher to kark it.
If she doesn't have the grace to go on the 25th anniversary of the miner's strike ending, I'm sending the boys round to beat her to death with a collection of Davy lamps.

Which politician / famous person are you looking forward to shuffling off this mortal coil, and how would you assist them in going?
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:06, 59 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

All of them.
In a big dildo ramming frenzy.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:16, Reply)

Kinky.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:21, Reply)

This sounds really wrong
But as a child I enjoyed the strike and the anti-Thatcher years.
Don't get me wrong. It's just one of those best of times/worst of times things.
I know families suffered and I understood that at the time, but from my point of view it involved visiting a Welsh mining town in a mini-bus, meeting lots of really interesting people, learning about politics, going to rallies, shouting "OUT OUT OUT!" and getting time off school.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:25, Reply)

Are you saying these were school trips? Cool school.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:29, Reply)

Nah
My mum and dad took me out of school occasionally and took me with them.
My mum just informed my teachers that is was part of my education.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:50, Reply)

Your parents rock.

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:55, Reply)

You live in the middle of nowhere, you sodding pest.

( thealternativefact, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:56, Reply)

No I don't.
We have all mod cons in our little town.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:06, Reply)

Yes, it's a regular mine of convenience
IN THE MIDDLE OF THE DESERT OF NORTHERN ENGLAND.
( thealternativefact, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:09, Reply)

WE HAVE CUNTRYSIDE.
And it's a stones throw from Manchester. It's hardly Guatamala.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:11, Reply)

*packs Kendal mintcake*
*begins trek*
( thealternativefact, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:17, Reply)

The mine of convenience
is the only one still operating in the north, you heartless bastard.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:17, Reply)

I'M CORNISH!
Don't talk to me about closed mines, you English scumbag.
( thealternativefact, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:19, Reply)

I actually have no English blood whatsoever
My father's family are Scots border gentry and my mother's parents were both Scots too.

So 'ner'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:22, Reply)

Forrin

( thealternativefact, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:53, Reply)

'Scots border gentry' - oxymoron, shurely?

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Thu 4 Mar 2010, 9:44, Reply)

Get your name down for the bash and live dangerously you big shirter.

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:21, Reply)

I'm barred from Yorkshire by order of the Crown

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:24, Reply)

Technically were Lancastrians as we have an Oldham postcode.
*blows raspberry*
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:25, Reply)

I'm English
SCREW YOU ALL!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:26, Reply)

Technically
'we're' Lancastrians, or technically you 'were' Lancastrians but now you're having a 'bash held at my house in Todmorden, West Yorkshire'?

*moons*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:30, Reply)

Pfft!
Stay in that cess pit you call London. I hope your new girlfriend is a pre-op tranny.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:32, Reply)

Me too

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:34, Reply)

Just because you're handsome you think your too good for the likes of us : (

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:38, Reply)

I'm hardly handsome and even less catch of the fucking year
I only get one visit a week with my daughter and your bash is logistically impossible, that's all, mate.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:44, Reply)

Desert of Northern England
Nahh That'd be Mytholmroyd

However, if Yorkshire had piles Todmorden would be where you'd apply suppositories
(CheatingRabbit, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 22:06, Reply)

They're boss

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:08, Reply)

That's probably why your boss too.
It's genetic.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:13, Reply)

Shucks kid!
My parents are so small. I love visiting them and feeling tall.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:15, Reply)

My parents are ace too but in a completely annoying way.

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:16, Reply)

Oh mine annoy
But I still know they're ace
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:21, Reply)

Hmmm...
Rupert Murdoch. I'd like to stretch his wrinkled balls with a pair of pliers until his entire skin comes off.
( thealternativefact, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:34, Reply)

Sounds like fun.
Maybe you could also get someone to thwack his testicles with rolled up copies of The Sun at the same time.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:39, Reply)

Oh I don't want him to enjoy this.
It won't be one of those 'Clendrix will hurt you and then you can have a reward' situations.
I'm gonna stretch his bollocks from Sydney to London and nail them to my front door.
( thealternativefact, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:50, Reply)

I'd quite like to watch that happen

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 20:59, Reply)

I think Thatcher is far too stubborn
to give anyone the satisfaction of a politically significant death date.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:00, Reply)

Alistair Darling, please.
I'd like to suspend him by his eyebrows over a crocodile infested canyon. Slowly, oh so slowly, I would increase his weight by force feeding him grain. The weight gain would cause pressure on his eyebrows, stretching them and stretching them for tens of feet until he reaches the river, whereby the crocodiles eat his feet, then his ankles, then his legs, then his torso, but then they leave his weird, greyscale head flapping in the breeze, because even a crocodile has to have standards.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:21, Reply)

creative, I like it

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:22, Reply)

I like this.
It involves crocodiles which is always a winner.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:23, Reply)

Get me a crocodile sandwich!
AND MAKE IT SNAPPY LOLOLOLOLOL
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:29, Reply)

You've reeeeeeally thought about this!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:27, Reply)

You wait til I see what I have planned for the PM

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:28, Reply)

You gonna fix his wonky eye?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:33, Reply)

I'd 'fix' your 'wonky eye'

( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:40, Reply)

*snort*

( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:41, Reply)

Ha!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:44, Reply)

BOO-YAHHH

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:46, Reply)

AWOOGA!
/Fashanu
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:57, Reply)

Bowie
Halberd to the eye, administered by me.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:26, Reply)

/not surprised at all
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:29, Reply)

Come now.
There's no way you predicted the use of a halberd.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:31, Reply)

it was in the top 5 choices, I think

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:33, Reply)

And why not.
It's the kind of poncy weapon you would choose.
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:34, Reply)

Halberds aren't poncy you oaf
They're two handed huge great poles with an axehead and a nasty spike on the end. Wholly unsuitable as fine dining cutlery.

*moons again*

*catches a chill*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:49, Reply)

It is poncy if no-one has heard of it.
*gives the finger*
( girlinthehole, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:59, Reply)

Halberds are indeed all of the win.
However mattocks have that personal touch.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 4 Mar 2010, 9:09, Reply)

Many, many slebcunts.
Jamie Oliver- cut out his tongue, cook it with honey and capers, then feed it to his bleeding maw and make him splutter the words 'Pukka', 'lovely', 'gor blimey' and 'mockney cuntsock' through the bubbling blood in his frenziedly bleeding buccal cavity. Jam it in there and watch him choke to death on it. Did I mention that I'd removed his teeth with pliers beforehand so he can't chew? I didn't? Silly me.

Clarkson- good old fashioned tying him to a tree, putting a tyre around his neck, soaking him in petrol then lighting the frizzy haired fuck. Petrolhead and all that, what what?

Mugabe- feed him to some particularly hungry sharks, feet first.

Thatcher- dose the old cunt up with ricin.

I could go on but quite frankly don't think I should.

Pip pip!
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:28, Reply)

Apropos of entirely nothing:
jew.bz/DP
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 3 Mar 2010, 21:33, Reply)

Thatcher.
Peel the bitch slowly and then chuck her in a bath of refined rocksalt crystals. Record the screams and use them to boil the "brains" of any other politician.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 4 Mar 2010, 9:13, Reply)