Eeeee, fan fiction creeps me out in general,
But especially slash :(
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:41, 4 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

doesn't creep me out
but seems like a massive waste of time. If you like to write, why not write original stuff of your own
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:43, Reply)

This is possibly the best thing you'll ever read on the internet
www.michaelkelly.fsnet.co.uk/orb1.htm
(PsychoChomp, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:45, Reply)

Forbidden

You don't have permission to access /orb1.htm on this server.

Additionally, a 403 Forbidden error was encountered while trying to use an ErrorDocument to handle the request.

Yeah that was the best thing ever.
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:45, Reply)

DAMMIT!
It was fan fiction about Roy orbison wrapped in clingfilm. :(
I wish it was still there.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:47, Reply)

clingfilm is evil.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:51, Reply)

?
michaelkelly.artofeurope.com/karl.htm
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:57, Reply)

My hero

(PsychoChomp, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:58, Reply)

That is disturbingly brilliant.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:00, Reply)

I agree.
*buys clingfilm for bash*
( girlinthehole, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:30, Reply)

amazing

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:49, Reply)

'Regrettably I find we have run out of seaweed following a maritime disaster in which various contaminants were released destroying the world supply of sargasso for generations to come,' I say smoothly. 'Instead I urge you to try our new cling-film wrap. The health-giving properties of this miracle substance cannot be overstated.'
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Sat 15 May 2010, 0:25, Reply)

It was well-written
And full of gay sex. Like, bubbling over the rim with gay sex.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:45, Reply)

Did it turn you on?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:45, Reply)

Only the one where Jeremy Clarkson
Was getting railed by Hamster, while the Stig looked on and wanked.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:52, Reply)

took me a moment to find it
but a friend who emails me random links for amusement (surprised they aren't on b3ta actually) included this one about a year ago

yuletidetreasure.org/archive/83/thelion.html

And yes, it did make me laugh *shames*
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:48, Reply)

does anyone remember Kris Akabusi sex stories?
it had such gems as "he whispered 'Awooga' in her ear and patted her on the fanny".
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 14 May 2010, 12:50, Reply)

This is without doubt the funniest thing I have ever read.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:15, Reply)

I've found some
www.est1892.co.uk/forums/archive/index.php/t-13383.html

but I don't know if they're the originals
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:19, Reply)

*weeps with laughter*
"Akabusi!" said a voice behind him. "Stop looking at my son with your cock out".
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:26, Reply)

I love "within hours it was over"

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:28, Reply)

'The rarefied air of the tailors brushed against his black and curlies like a fart in a tanga brief and for a moment he felt like a black Messiah'
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:31, Reply)

Fucking amazing!

(Colonel Santiago Introduced surprised kitty to the world., Fri 14 May 2010, 13:29, Reply)

it's where I discovered the word clunge

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:40, Reply)

I cannot thank you enough for this.
I'm actually weeping at my desk.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:37, Reply)

that's pretty much what me and my old boss spent an afternoon doing after we discovered them

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:39, Reply)

I am in awe of the writing style.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:42, Reply)

there are a few imitations which are quite poor
but the originals are just brilliant, with phrases like "a clunge so tight it shopped at Poundland"
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:44, Reply)

The constant references to his 'dungs' has me in fits.
I can say in all honesty I've not seen anything so funny in as long as I can remember.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:49, Reply)

it really is good

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:52, Reply)

I am having to force myself not to keep reading it
because suppressing this much laughter has given me a headache.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:54, Reply)

hahaha
get home, have a spliff and laugh the night away. while eating meat
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:55, Reply)

Got my Tayyab's leftovers to eat
and half a bottle of cognac to polish off, and I'm going to get a nice Malbec as well - all in honour BUSI NIGHT.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:59, Reply)

sounds grand
having celebratory drinks in my local tonight. I need a good base of stonedness to cope.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:00, Reply)

I'm so glad I'm at home today and can read these!

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:04, Reply)

I went in thinking "its not that funny
but when I got to "epic bristols and a fanny more hairy than Richard Keyes back. " I spat 7up across keyboard, monitors and desk
( Peej, Fri 14 May 2010, 14:08, Reply)

but but but
Its was Fash who said Awooga, on Gladiators
( Peej, Fri 14 May 2010, 13:57, Reply)