congratulations
now you get to put up with every fucker having an opinion on your wedding and how you should do it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 10:46, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I have more or less an idea of what I want
Very general, though, so I'm open to suggestions.

Probably the main reception in Tenerife and then something smaller in England for those who can't travel.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 10:49, Reply)

Moar Croissants!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 10:50, Reply)

That's a good idea!
Croissants for everybody! Cheap and easy.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 10:53, Reply)

Too Fucking Right

(Bazongaloid, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 10:50, Reply)

shit isn't it?
we've only been engaged about a month and my mrs is already very sick of people telling her that despite what she thinks now, once she tries on a meringue she will really want to get married wearing it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:00, Reply)

I've managed to upset people on both my mothers and fathers sides of the family
Stupid cunts.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:02, Reply)

I don't really care about upsetting family
I was planning to not invite anyone except grandparents, but decided that that would mean my parents have to look after them, rather than enjoy themselves, so am inviting aunts and uncles to do that instead.

it's annoying because my cousins on my mum's side are great, and those on my dad's side are shit.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:03, Reply)

I don't mean to give you wedding advice, but
Only invite awesome people, ignore the rest. Fuck courtesy, fuck equality, fuck politeness.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:05, Reply)

I'm planning to invite all of them
Luckily, the shit ones don't talk to us, so probably they won't be going. They'll find a good excuse, as they have done for 28 years, not to travel to Tenerife and visit us there.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:08, Reply)

You do know that you have to ask the queen if you want to get married right?

(Bazongaloid, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:10, Reply)

We'll get married in Spain
So I hope not. However, I'll ask if she gives me a good present.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:14, Reply)

^this
Thankfully this is something I will never have to worry about.
( girlinthehole, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:16, Reply)

courtesy, equality and politeness aren't entering into it
reasons for inviting my aunts and uncles are:
1. people to look after my grandparents
2. More presents
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:21, Reply)

That works
I was thinking about all the others, people you've not seen in years etc.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:22, Reply)

naa, bollocks
they can all fuck off. I see all my good old mates all the time, so they are all in. The mrs has broken ties with her old mates as they are shit, and we see the best of our uni mates reasonably frequently so they are in too.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:24, Reply)

Sounds perfect!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:26, Reply)

My uncles partner got the hump because I hadn't invited her daughter
which would have meant including the baby and her husband, and due to lack of numbers I couldn't, but I had invited their son, because he's living at home. Rather than coming to me and raising this apparent snub, she waits until the last minute and then my uncle has to raise it with my dad who then asks me who says, let me ask mrs al and see. I was a bit pissed off at being told who to invite, but couldn't be bothered with the grief so I was going to say, yeah, she can come along as we've had some drop outs.

But before that message could be conveyed we got a one line e-mail saying they wouldn't be attending the wedding or reception.

So my dads response was "fuck her, the stupid bitch" and that was also my opinion.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:09, Reply)

fuck that shit
there's no need for it.

a friend of ours is having a nightmare because of step-parents. their head table is going to have about 20 people on it because they are all being wankers.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:14, Reply)

I haven't seen practically any of my cousins in over a decade
they can sod-off if they think they're getting invited. Same goes to anyone who wants to bring a baby. They can f*** off and die!
( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:27, Reply)

unfortunately my bro and my gf's sister both have babies
so they have to come and bring them :-(
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:29, Reply)

Guy I shared an office with got married
and invited me and our supervisor. Supervisor's new born sproglet went for the world's loudest scream competition entry right at the, "I blah blah blah take thee blah blah blah to be my lawfully wedded..."

Not happening at mine, they can put them in the kennels for the day (or whatever it is you do with babies).
( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:33, Reply)

If it's you - then rape them

(Bazongaloid, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:42, Reply)

I hate hearing babies scream at the best of times

( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:48, Reply)

You just tell people beforehand
"If it cries take it out."
That's just bad manners that she didn't take it out.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:43, Reply)

My friends have banned kids from their wedding
Smart move.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:44, Reply)

oh yeah, young children too
they're just as bad in completely different ways
( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:47, Reply)

his wife did take it out
but from the side of the church the screaming was still audible and there was a minute or so before it was actually out of the way. Stupid babies, no sense of occasion.
( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:47, Reply)

at my brother's wedding my aunt, uncles and grandparents arrived really quite late
holding up the proceedings.

as soon as they got in the venue and settled in my aunt immediately started tutting at someone's kid who had a made a brief happy laughing sound.

stupid cow.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:51, Reply)

I wouldn't know
I was the perfect baby, child, teenager and indeed adult.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:52, Reply)

perfect architypal behaviourly disturbed, demanding only-child
( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:55, Reply)

I only ever made one demand
and it was "Be aware of me", on a very boring Sunday afternoon.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:01, Reply)

Yeah yeah yeah
Right, I'm off to photograph the Stockholm Syndrome bank thingy for chickenlady.
( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:04, Reply)

You mean you're off to take pictures of chickens
for the lady in the Stockholm bank.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:07, Reply)

Lovely!
I'm going to ask my mother and father to write a list down with the family I should invite, and that's it.

As I said, the big mayority haven't bother to visit us in Tenerife for 30 years, so I'm pretty certain they won't go.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:15, Reply)

I'm not engaged
Although lots of people (usually women) seem to think that I should be, and they keep asking about when they can buy a new hat.

If we do get married, I'm tempted not to invite anyone who's been going on about it. There's quite a few who seem to think they'd get invited but I'd never have thought of asking them. So they can GTF.

Oh, and congrats, Aberracion!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:04, Reply)

Thank you!
I'd like to follow your advice, but then, I couldn't invite my mother. I'm very worried about that, as she loves being the queen of the party and having all the attention focussed to her.

I hated everytime she said I should be getting married because it was her time to be the mother of the wife. Or everytime she insists I should have a baby because it's her time to be a grandmother.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:10, Reply)

I'm not engaged either
but the missus insists that the drunken proposal text I sent her before we met still counts.
( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:18, Reply)

It does.
You so meant it.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:34, Reply)

I could barely stand at the time!

( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:37, Reply)

Dude
Seriously.
You want to marry me. It's understandable.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:45, Reply)

*sigh*
*looks for engagement rings*
( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:55, Reply)

You know the one ;)

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:02, Reply)

She's a scouse bird
A brass curtain ring with a bit of broken bottle glued onto it would do, surely?

*runs and hides*
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:06, Reply)

*finds and thumps*

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:08, Reply)

OK, OK, stop!

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:12, Reply)

I think my bloke's parents want me to get married in a church
which is never going to happen.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:37, Reply)

I think mine would probably like that
It will be my chance to let my seething, militant athieism shine.
( djtrialprice, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:43, Reply)

I like churches
They so pretty.
There's a little gem near me with a lovely garden. I used to live opposite.
But I doubt they'd be willing to do it without all that God business. Maybe if I threw in an extra tenner and a little boy for the priest...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:51, Reply)

My cousin got married
and they had a civil ceremony. It was the first I'd been to, and was really a breath of fresh air.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:53, Reply)

My insane auntie is having a civil ceremony next week
It's well cheap but in a nice setting, so I hear.
I think I'll enjoy it. Less fuss than my cousin's wedding which was a full-on monster wedding. Too much pressure for all involved.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:56, Reply)

because it was over quickly?
the last couple of church ones I've been to the crazy vicar has spoiled it in my view.

one mentioned sex every few words, and the other started banging on about GM foods and stuff. just what you want to hear.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:56, Reply)

The expeditious nature of it was one advantage, yes
But also because there was no praying, singing or general faffing about to appease a deity.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:59, Reply)

I can't bear that stuff either
after going to a christening a while ago I came to the conclusion that if someone asked me to be their child's godfather I'd have to say no because I couldn't bring myself to stand up and waffle on about how I believe in god and renounce satan.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:04, Reply)

I prefer civil ceremonies
The last one I went to was lovely, and over in 20 minutes. Perfect!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:02, Reply)

You should get married in Paddy's Wigwam

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:55, Reply)

Too modern
It's right near me, so my idea was get married in the nice little church then have the photos on the Wigwam's piazza or steps.
But they wouldn't let me marry my cat :(
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:57, Reply)

Because your cat's Jewish?
The Anglican Cathedral's far prettier. I saw Paddy's Wigwam every day at uni, and went to a beer fest in the crypts beneath it...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:00, Reply)

I can see one cathedral out of each bedroom
I'm very lucky.
I do prefer the Anglican too. It's absolutely gorgeous.
I know one of the Canon dudes, but he knows I am culturally Catholic and not religious so he might object.
And the cat is from Bootle, he is DEFFO a Paddy.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:03, Reply)

Nice! You must be pretty central then, somewhere around Hardman Street?
And yes, your cat's definitely a Paddy.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:08, Reply)

A bit further up ;)

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:09, Reply)

I can't remember many streetnames around there
Although I did enjoy an intimate moment with a lovely student lass in the Halls further up there.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:12, Reply)

Haven't we all...

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:16, Reply)

You nearly broke a finger inside a girl in the laundrette of her Halls as well?
*high-fives*
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:18, Reply)

Fuck the haters
spoke a wise man.

spoke rapped
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 11:26, Reply)

what he just said ^^
do it the way you want it and have a wonderful time!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Tue 1 Jun 2010, 12:03, Reply)