Camping
I've just booked a camping weekend. My girlfriend isn't massively enthusiastic. So tell your camping tales here, and I'll selectively quote the ones that support my viewpoint to her.

That said, of course, the best tales are of disasters. I recall going with 3 schoolfriends many years ago (The night Nottingham Forest beat Malmo to win the European Cup to be precise.) The site was quite full and one of the lads fancied doing some night fishing so we looked for a spot at the bottom of the hill near the river. There were tents all around but we were surprised to find what seemed to be a perfectly placed pitch. That night it absolutely pissed it down and we went to sleep worrying slightly about the borrowed tent's ability to withstand the downpour. Around two o' clock I awoke feeling somewhat damp. The tent had done it's job, but we had pitched it in a something of a hollow and were getting flooded (this was before sewn in groundsheets). We salvaged what we could and spent the night in the toilet block eating Campbell's meatballs (that's not a euphemism). I trudged off to the phonebox at the as soon as I felt it wouldn't be indecently early to wake my parents up, and asked my Mum to come and pick us up, our week of adventure and showing that we were capable of looking after ourselves aborted after one night. It was years before I went again.
(Cave Duck, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:13, 226 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

WHO SUNG THIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSS

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:14, Reply)

What's that sound?
Oh that's just Psychochimp wheeling out the same joke again
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:21, Reply)

I'm trying to force a meme,
it'll come eventually.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:22, Reply)

oh ok
carry on.

EDIT: Hold on, if it's a meme that suggests every time Cave Duck posts someone should write "who sung this" then that's just ONLINE BULLYING.

Although I suppose the guy who wrote about the Honda Accord has taken his fair share.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:23, Reply)

In other news I think I should block myself from facebook for a while.
I'm starting to get a pavlovian response to peoples changes in relationship status.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:24, Reply)

Oooh, a female friend newly single and probably feeling vulnerable?
BONE ON.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:25, Reply)

Pretty much, and that's why I should not go on it for a while.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:26, Reply)

It's ok, Chompy.
Just refrain from posting anything and have a wank over their holiday photos instead.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:29, Reply)

Nobodys holiday pictures are ever that interesting.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:29, Reply)

Though it's the first thing you look for, right?
Quick bikini check.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:36, Reply)

Stop projecting,
it's not something I really think of looking for.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:40, Reply)

Lies
On the Internet.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:41, Reply)

I'm just going to do it for any posts I can't be bothered to read.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:30, Reply)

that's all posts.
So it'll just be *post*, followed by "first", then "who sung this?"
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:32, Reply)

fingers crossed.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:33, Reply)

I bloody love camping
but the amount of times you end up wet/have branches land on your tent in a thunderstorm or your bastard friends take your tent down with you in it* might put some people off.

*actually I was the bastard here
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:17, Reply)

I go camping all the time
there's no need for it to be uncomfortable or cold. I've got a big, watertight tent, a king size airbed, comfy chairs, a decent bbq. take a couple of duvets, enough pillows and blankets and stuff and it's like being at home, but in a field.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:18, Reply)

Glamping. Wimp.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:24, Reply)

I'm going to sound like a complete bitch here, but I'm comfortable with that.
Has it ever crossed your mind to let active threads quieten down before posting a new one?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:20, Reply)

I gave up on your thread before this one was posted.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:21, Reply)

BITCH

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:29, Reply)

Ah but when I started typing, your thread wasn't there.
I'm quite slow and took two calls between starting and posting.
Anyway I think most people can cope with more than one thread.
(Cave Duck, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:32, Reply)

Best camping trick.
Assuming someone has the standard crappy-dome-tent-with-outer-and-inner setup, you can detatch the inner and turn it 90 degrees so when they come back pissed they will spend a good half hour trying to figure out how to get into their tent.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:28, Reply)

I am totally doing this next time

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:29, Reply)

I'm done with camping.
Actually, I'm not. I'm done with festival camping though.
If I went to a nice campsite with good showers and... Oh who am I kidding? Sod camping!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:30, Reply)

Festival camping is more like staying in a refugee camp than a camp site.
(omg I can't wait)
(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:32, Reply)

this is true
and I can't wait either
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:33, Reply)

The first time, I was VIP camping
and that was bad enough.
Then there was the year of the Leeds riots, and I just couldn't put myself through it anymore.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:33, Reply)

Ha reading and leeds are shit.
Glastonbury is awesome.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:34, Reply)

You're in a tent
It's dirty.
End of.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:34, Reply)

Nothing wrong with a bit of mud.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:35, Reply)

Body dirt.
Greasy hair.
No.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:36, Reply)

Agreed

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:38, Reply)

Rubbish, just rewatch The Good Life.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:39, Reply)

mmmm, felicity kendal

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:41, Reply)

With a bit of soot on her nose

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:42, Reply)

you need to come camping with me
so I can show you how it's done
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:32, Reply)

Does that have to be done in a tent?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:34, Reply)

yeah, but my tent is nicer than most peoples houses

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:36, Reply)

Does it have electricity and a shower?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:37, Reply)

no, but they generally aren't much further away than in a house

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:38, Reply)

Is there somewhere for me to dry my hair with a hairdryer?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:39, Reply)

yep

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:40, Reply)

Hmmm

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:40, Reply)

It has a boulangerie and manservants

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:38, Reply)

Of course!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:39, Reply)

actually there's only one valet
and it's a patisserie
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:40, Reply)

Apologies, I was thinking you were talking about your winter tent

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:42, Reply)

I think Vipros may be overstating how good his tent is.
I heard that the kitchens in the east wing leave a lot to be desired.
(Cave Duck, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:01, Reply)

I've only ever done festival camping
but I'm going camping at the end of July and I'm quite looking forward to it. It's at some kind of barn type thing I think.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:33, Reply)

barn camping is fine
you're indoors, there are often basic beds provided, and more often than now, toilets.
I don't understand the whole 'lying on a 2mm thick piece of foam when I could be IN BED' aspect of wild or campsite camping.
( ascorbate, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:35, Reply)

if it's in a campsite
it's likely to be next to a car, in which case there is no excuse for not having loads of comfortable stuff
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:37, Reply)

unless you've driven there in a minibus
full of mountaineering club folk so there's only room for a small rucksack each and far more tesco value lager than any human ever needs to drink.
( ascorbate, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:38, Reply)

there's the problem
club = organised fun = rubbish
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:41, Reply)

This is very much my girlfriend's view.
However we're never going to be hardcore campers. It's essentially a way of getting together with a group of friends, who all have children of a similar age, for a weekend. We did it fior the first time last year and borrowed absolutely everything. This year I've started to get some stuff together, but rather than get the essentials like a table,which we'll be able to borrow again, I figured it would be better to go for the more "luxury" items that make experience more comfortable like a carpet for the tent and an inflatable sofa.
(Cave Duck, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:47, Reply)

I hate camping
it's always too hot or too cold, sometimes both at once, and it is never comfortable, no matter how many different camoing mats you try out. And once, the mountaineering club I was in (who are renowned for taking incompetence to whole new levels, especially when map reading is involved) managed to set up camp on a bed of wild garlic. It ensured we weren't visited by vampires, but also that other walkers steered well clear of us for the whole trip. It took several showers to rid myself of the reek of garlic.
And then there was the DofE trip where one girl decided to carry her turds with her in plastic bags. That was delightful under canvas.
( ascorbate, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:33, Reply)

a friend of mine was once hunting in his tent for bog roll at Glastonbury
"oooh" he says "a bag of shit"
"what, like a bag with a shit in it?" I reply hilariously
"yes." he says holding aloft a carrier bag full of poo which his girlfriend had left in there
*big sadfaces*
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:37, Reply)

Good heavens!
My aunty once climbed over my gf's head, fell on her, continued to stumble into the 'porch' area of the tent where we were keeping our food and drinks, and pissed there. Right there. We could hear her pissing. In our tent. My aunty.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:39, Reply)

^ this is why camping is eeeeevil
who wants to EVER hear members of their family pissing?
( ascorbate, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:39, Reply)

She is vile at the best of times
She keeps picking her nose in my mum's living room and gets really annoyed when we shout at her. I called her a dog on Sunday and she said "Don't you ever call me a dog" and I said "Yes because they only lick their balls whereas you are digging up your fucking hooter."
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:42, Reply)

Wiggy does this all the time, it drives me mad.
I tell him off if I catch him, but the thinks if he's sitting next to me on the sofa that I can't see him. I'm not a T Rex!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:45, Reply)

You wish you were though
Look, we all pick our noses sometimes. Especially if theres a big massive dry crow blocking it.
Just go to the frigging toilet, pick the offending thing out, then wash your hands thoroughly.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:47, Reply)

Blimeh, Ma - calm down.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:13, Reply)

You mind your lip you
And wash your hands
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:23, Reply)

I hope she doesn't roll it into little balls and flick it at the telly.
That's a criminal wste of a chewy one.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 13:05, Reply)

just don't go with any of your family

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:42, Reply)

I'd go camping with my dad
I wouldn't mind him seeing me with hair like Soft Sal and no make-up.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:43, Reply)

You do seem to have a reverse Oedipus complex.
Maybe you should get it seen to.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:53, Reply)

What, you mean I don't fancy my dad enough?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:54, Reply)

No, Oedipus fancied his mum.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:56, Reply)

See Lab's post below
Well if I fancied him properly, I'd MIND him seeing me without my hair done and no make-up wouldn't I?
I make the effort when I've got my sights on a bloke.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:58, Reply)

But once you've got the bloke
The make-up remains undone, hair barely even blow-dried, comfortable-but-fading pyjama trousers, pastel cotton pants, odd socks...
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:00, Reply)

How DARE you!
I'm no slattern.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:01, Reply)

I lived with a lass at uni (Smithdown road, no less)
Who would dress up to the nines to bag a bloke, then almost immediately go back to her PJ trews, odd socks and hoody attire whenever she had them 'round. I felt sorry for them, she was quite fit when she put the effort in.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:05, Reply)

That's terrible
Even if I have to wear pyjamas (say it's inbetween breakfast and getting ready to go out time but it's not sexytiem) they are very nice and they match and ethey're either gingham or spotted or striped and they have short sleves and dainty buttons.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:08, Reply)

I'm quite relaxed all of the time
so at least people know what they're getting with me I guess. Odd socks aren't so bad if they can't be seen
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:10, Reply)

I couldn't wear odd socks
I'd have a nervous breakdown
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:10, Reply)

does even being near them
make you break out into a sweat?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:11, Reply)

yes
My mate used to live with me and she constantly wore odd socks. I mean even to go to work. Nobody could see them but she was stepping out with a different kind of sock on each foot, all day.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:23, Reply)

shocking
it's enough to make you feel a bit queasy. I bet she probably had missing buttons as well on the inside of her coat
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:23, Reply)

Haha
Shurrup you
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:28, Reply)

Pyjamas are only acceptable in hospital

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:10, Reply)

There are times when you don't want to put your clothes on but you don't want to be naked, and sexy nightdress time has just passed
My pyjamas are beauteeful, like semi-outfits.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:13, Reply)

That's what dressing gowns are for
Although I'll relent and say that PJs are fine for sleepovers.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:14, Reply)

We're going to have to agree to disagree on this one

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:19, Reply)

You mean an Electra complex?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:56, Reply)

That's a new one to me,
But yes.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:58, Reply)

you mean she dresses skimpily and fights crime?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:59, Reply)

That's Elektra
And if Roota was Jennifer Garner, I'd be unable to enter Liverpool by court order.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:01, Reply)

You are anyway
It's all round the Khazi-house
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:02, Reply)

Libel!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:03, Reply)

I've only been festival camping
my dad loves camping and my mother hates it. My dad did a lot of fairly intensive amateur mountain/ rock climbing when he was younger, and after they married, persuaded her out camping/mountain climbing a few times. I think she views that as dues paid
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:44, Reply)

I spent last weekend camping on an airfield
Even in my crappy dome tent it was enjoyable, possibly because I was pissed both evenings.

Two summers ago I went camping up near Holkham bay in Norfolk with some friends. I had £30 for two nights and three days. £13 went on the campsite and £14 went on a massive bottle of Sambuca. This meant that the only food I could afford was six Morrisons "17% pork" sausage rolls. I'd be hungry enough to eat one and get halfway through the next before even Sambuca couldn't keep my mind off what I was eating.

To compensate, I just drunk enough that I floated through the entire weekend in an almost hallucinatory state. 'Twas awesome.



Also, we were the only people on site. Whilst we were away one day, we constructed an elaborate fantasy involving a Catholic girls sixth form college trip (we were 17/18 at the time). The fantasy was so fully fledged that we were almost surprised when we got back to a still empty field...
( Hdjejjwsjdjjf LOOK, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:45, Reply)

Camping disaster
Arranged to meet GF at Wookey Hole camp site. I arrived first, put up the tent, sorted everything out. Waited, waited, waited. Three hours late she turns up, in floods of tears. Get her to stop blubbing, then go to Wells for some grub. Every time I say something, she start crying again. We get back to the campsite and get down to some kip. About 4 O'clock in the morning, I'm awoken with the question, "why is it so light?" My, becuase we're in a fucking tent and its the middle of June, did not go down well. More calming down required.
Had an OK rest of the weekend, in the caves, going to Glastonbury Tor, and some nice walking. Sunday afternoon, she followed me to the M5 so she did not get lost, and we said our farewells on the bridge at the motorway junction.

A couple of days later the letter arrived. Apparently it was my fault we broke up, followed by a list of my shortcomings.

I haven't been camping since.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:50, Reply)

Did you deliberately misspell meet to make it sound like innuendo?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:51, Reply)

No, I was thinking of lunch

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:54, Reply)

She dumped you by letter?
when was this?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:52, Reply)

About 1993 I should think
Real letters and cards are nice to give and receive. Unless they are from Clintons.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:55, Reply)

nice...unless it says "Welcome to dumpsville, population YOU"
I cant imagine dumping someone by letter, because when you post it you have only started the process and it sits there in the box like a little cancerous dumping growth. And what if you speak to her? Has she received the letter? Do I tell her i've sent her a letter?

I'm thinking too hard about this.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:59, Reply)

We spoke on the phone on the Monday evening
and she didn't mention it. Perhaps I'm shit at detecting people feelings.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:02, Reply)

She sounds like a right mental
ah well, she's probably ruining some other poor sods life now
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:03, Reply)

No doubt about it, she was rather loopy.
I don't wish her any malice though. It was her loss really.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:08, Reply)

You a wise level headed man.
I hope all my exes are fat and miserable failures, which is really messed up when you consider that i'm the one that generally ended the relationships.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:12, Reply)

1945
Just as he was due home as well :(
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:55, Reply)

Deserved I suppose

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 10:57, Reply)

I bet she was cavorting with the American servicemen beind his back
and how did she get those nylons eh?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:02, Reply)

'Zackly
And the baby came out black
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:03, Reply)

ooo fancy that, I always knew she was a rum-bugger that one
always had ciggerettes she did and she would smoke them in the street without a bye-or-leave
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:05, Reply)

dirty cow

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:09, Reply)

Well, she lived in Tavistock, and them Devon people are a bit strange.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:05, Reply)

that explains it
most of the population centres in the South West are full of weirdos. Exeter is the last bastion of normality
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:11, Reply)

if Exeter is your last bastion
of normality, then things have gone seriously wrong
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:12, Reply)

tell me about it

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:12, Reply)

see Norfolk above (or possibly on the other thread)

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:15, Reply)

Do people go on holiday to Exeter?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:20, Reply)

Only people from Tiverton.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:33, Reply)

haha
true. Tiverton people are weird.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:36, Reply)

Camping is awesome.
Tell her to MTFU.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:04, Reply)

How was it?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:09, Reply)

FUCKING AWESOME
Words cannot aptly describe it.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:10, Reply)

What was the highlight?

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:11, Reply)

Contrary to popular opinion,
I didn't shag anyone, alright?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:12, Reply)

I was talking about the bands
but it's interesting you felt the need to tell me that.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:13, Reply)

Ahhh, I read your last post as "Was that the highlight"
Referring to my use of the word Fucking.

Highlight = AC/DC. I was so close to Brian Johnson. It was beautiful.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:15, Reply)

But you didn't fuck him?
Or indeed anyone?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:16, Reply)

Note: I'm teasing
It's none of my business.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:16, Reply)

Hahaha no I didn't fuck Brian Johnson.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:19, Reply)

*envies*
that must have been awesome.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:17, Reply)

It was.
Youtube the performance, they put on such a show, it was phenomenal.
So many props!
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:18, Reply)

sweet
I'm glad I'm going to at least one of the decent festivals this year. Couldn't have handled the jealousy of not going to any I think!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:35, Reply)

Which one are you going to?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:37, Reply)

Sonisphere
not only are some of my favourite big names playing, but some of my very favourite small names too.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:37, Reply)

same
like Dir en Grey
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:42, Reply)

I'm interested to check them out
I'm really looking forward to Bigelf. They are going to be awesome.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:43, Reply)

They are :D

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:44, Reply)

haven't heard much
will look them up.

Vipros I think you'd like Dir en Grey. They're a tad unusual, and their singer is the funniest thing to watch live ever
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:50, Reply)

Bigelf are prog rock tastic
Check out their song The Evils of Rock and Roll

I do like unusual things. what I've seen about Dir en Grey certainly makes me curious
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:57, Reply)

I shall find some Bigelf definitely
Dir en Grey used to be really into visual kei (excessive clothes/makeup) but they're toned down now in that respect and ramped up musically. When I saw them last year the singer was even tinier than he looks generally
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:00, Reply)

what is the music like?
I'd check them out, but can't use youtube or other useful things in the office
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:05, Reply)

It's quite hard to describe
Japanese lyrics, fairly shouty in bits, but a lot of melody. Fairly heavy metal I think. I hoped wikipedia would define their genre for me but all I got was 'the genre of their music difficult to determine (though it is generally considered to be a form of metal music'

They don't really do the visual kei thing anymore sadly
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:09, Reply)

did you see the japanese band that were on the main stage last year?
when coheed and cambria's ferry was late

started out interesting with masks and some good music, but then went a bit shit, and they started having a go at the crowd when people were leaving
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:11, Reply)

I think they were called FACT
didn't see them though. I may have still been arsing around on the campsite at that point
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:13, Reply)

they could have been good
sadly they weren't
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:14, Reply)

that's a pity
did you see Skindred (they played quite early)
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:15, Reply)

yep
love Skindred. I know the drummer and a good mate of mine is good mates with the guitarist
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:20, Reply)

they're coming again this year I think
I thought they were awesome last year
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:27, Reply)

they are indeed
and they can be counted on to be awesome
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:27, Reply)

I was overjoyed when they were announced for Sonisphere
did the singer play two keyboards while singing when you saw them?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:50, Reply)

I'd love to see AC/DC,
maybe one day I can afford their extortionate ticket prices.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:17, Reply)

same here
some people can get away with it.

the venue we played in last thursday is a club run by joss stone's mum. it's ok, but really up it's own arse. They had posters up for Solomon Burke with Joss Stone as a guest. Tickets were £50.

No matter how legendary someone apparently is, charging £50 for a gig in a relatively shitty club in Exeter, with an annoying try-hand bint as a special guest, is outrageous.

I paid £50 to see Metallica at the O2. That was worth it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:35, Reply)

I paid £75 to see the last NIN gig at the O2, with Jane's Addiction supporting
But that was on eBay, because tix sold out in about 2 mins and the website kept crashing on me. I HAD to go.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:36, Reply)

I was sorely disappointed in NIN at Sonisphere last year
it was not a festival set by any means. Really dirgy.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:37, Reply)

Yeah, he did it on purpose apparently
He reckoned he couldn't play the hard, fast songs as Metallica would be on next. I'm not fussed that I missed it, especially as the O2 gig was the best gig I've ever been to.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:38, Reply)

I was happy enough with the NIN set
at Sonisphere. It felt quite emotional.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:42, Reply)

Emotional sums up the O2 gig
23 songs of awesomeness, with the most moving rendition of Hurt I've seen live.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:44, Reply)

Hurt was fantastic
at Soni. Seriously, it was a perfect setting for it- as they started playing, the clouds swept over the sun, it became cold and there was almost dead silence towards the end. People were crying around me
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:46, Reply)

really?
I must have been stood with some cold, hard bastards.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:46, Reply)

Lots of tears when they played it at the O2 as well
Last ever NIN song played live in the UK. Such a good song as well.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:47, Reply)

oh you mean the version at Soni
was the last one?
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:48, Reply)

Nope, at the O2 I think
Might be wrong though.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:51, Reply)

you are indeed
because that was during July (some mates went) and Sonisphere was August
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:52, Reply)

I had thought that Sonisphere was their last UK performance too
which was why I was surprised by the setlist
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:54, Reply)

it wasn't shit by any means
and at least they weren't limp bizkit or linkin park. they were shit.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:44, Reply)

true
people just walked away from Linkin Park
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:46, Reply)

I still can't believe the guy wheeled on his new (even more shit than Linkin Park) band for half the headline slot
outrageous
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:47, Reply)

Fort Minor?
I was given the album. I like precisely 1 song on it.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:48, Reply)

Death by Sunrise
I think. They were dire. They were literally a Linkin Park mashup
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:49, Reply)

could be Dead by Sunrise?
they were even worse than a Linkin Park mashup sounds.

the only thing that annoyed me more than that was Machine Head being special guests, cos I think they are hugely overrated (i.e. shit)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:50, Reply)

personally I'd have been happier
if Machinehead had been told to fuck off. They acted like children over the placing, and when Sonisphere tried to make amends they just threw another hissy fit
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:51, Reply)

yeah
fucking tossers
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:51, Reply)

I really like MH...
And think they're awesome live.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:52, Reply)

have to disagree
but shouty/screamy metal bands aren't really my thing

although Slayer are going to be awesome.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:53, Reply)

I consider them more 'groove metal'
And not as shouty-screamy as a lot of metal bands.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:55, Reply)

last year was full of shouty/screamy
which wasn't my bag. too much constant guitar and drums going on, and not melodic enough.

Which is why Alice in Chains stood out so much as being incredibly awesome.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:56, Reply)

I'm glad I saw Heaven and Hell

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:58, Reply)

I only saw about half I think
which I'm kicking myself about
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:00, Reply)

It was raining quite hard
at that point I think. They were quite good though (and possibly that was their last UK gig.)

Same with Avenged Sevenfold. Not my favourite band by any measure, but I'm glad I watched them since that was their final UK gig (where they're all alive anyway)
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:02, Reply)

the rain might've been it
and the call to spliffs :-)
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 12:06, Reply)

perhaps not
but I don't think they're that accomplished really. Definitely not enough so to be throwing hissy fits
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:57, Reply)

I would've thought having Metallica on next would be a better reason to play those songs
I heard a lot of mutterings amongst the crowd during and after. Not happy.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:43, Reply)

Yeah, everyone I know who went said they were disappointed
(apart from AmberI!)
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:44, Reply)

that was last year
my feet hurt a huge amount still, so I wasn't by that point in the mood for moshing, dancing or having my feet stamped on. So a slow, quiet set wasn't the worst thing in the world to me
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:47, Reply)

I can't be arsed with moshing and dancing these days, my headbanging days are behind me
I just enjoy the music and the atmosphere
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:49, Reply)

mostly this is true of me
but there are going to be some bands that I'm determined to try and get to front for
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:52, Reply)

I think Pendulum might tempt into a bit of a dance
depends how much booze I've had.

I've just been reminded that 65daysofstatic are playing. that'll be great
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:53, Reply)

Pendulum got me dancing. SOBER.
They were amazing, especially their cover/mix of Voodoo People, and Island Pt2
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:54, Reply)

I can't wait to see them
I've been listening to them a load over the last few weeks, and got really into it.

going to be great live
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:55, Reply)

Oh, hello you
Enjoy Download then?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:09, Reply)

FUCKING YES
I don't know how to express it without capitals and swearing.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:10, Reply)

Glad you did!
Did Al and DJTP behave themselves?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:12, Reply)

Al did.
I didn't get to see Dj cos my phone broke and then everyone elses ran out of credit/battery so I had no way of meeting up with them. :(
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:13, Reply)

You didn't spot the flag he made?
I'm glad Al did though.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:17, Reply)

I didn't know what campsite he was on.
It's a very big place you know.
Yeah, Al did. He's actually very nice IRL.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:20, Reply)

I can second this.
I'm gutted you missed Furtive though
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:21, Reply)

Me too :(

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:26, Reply)

Ta, Apples.
I desperately needed a jolt of atavistic youthfulness.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:22, Reply)

But I don't have a tail.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:26, Reply)

You are mottled blue though?

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:39, Reply)

Thanks. I was just thinking that there wasn't much for me to quote to her. You've saved the day.

(Cave Duck, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:09, Reply)

I can't tell if this is sarcastic or not.
But I'll go with you being deeply grateful for my eloquence and logical reasoning.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:11, Reply)

Noooooo Manzanita!
Some people just can't do it.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:09, Reply)

This is true, I spose.
I do know a few people who wouldn't last five minutes in a tent.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:12, Reply)

The tent bit is fine
It's the surrounding misery that bothers me. Maybe I'm never drunk enough when camping.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:15, Reply)

We had a tent confusion, so I wasn't in my nice one,
I was in a holey, leaky one and everything I owned was permanently damp. But I was too drunk/ to hyped up to care most of the time. So yes, I prescribe MOAR ALCOHOL.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:17, Reply)

I'll remember this should I ever end up in a tent again

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:21, Reply)

Just use it as a rule of thumb for any social situation.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:22, Reply)

You were too fast for me
I was going to say exactly that.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:24, Reply)

Good lord no
Seen Blind Date with Kim Basinger and Bruce Willis?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:24, Reply)

I've only seen the one with Cilla Black

(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:26, Reply)

Combine the two
There's me drunk.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:27, Reply)

I can imagine you loudly trying to set people up and being shocked by innuendo
with sick in your hair.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:28, Reply)

No, loudly setting myself up and forcing innuendo
with piss in my shoes
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:31, Reply)

I don't mind the tent or the surroundings
The lack of clean toilets is what puts me off.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:23, Reply)

The toilets were actually surprisingly good.
No long drops, only chemical portaloos that got cleaned everyday.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:25, Reply)

Mmmm...
Even like that. I'm so picky about my toilets... I think I'll rather pass a week without using it than share it with strangers.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:26, Reply)

Have you seent he blokes who clean those?
Whistling away as though they were wiping a windscreen.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:27, Reply)

Ayayayayay
I'm feeling sick just thinking about it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:27, Reply)

Here's a photo of people playing football in the poo pit at glastonbury
i201.photobucket.com/albums/aa228/soundcontent/gf388.jpg
(it's empty)
(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:32, Reply)

that's quite a cool pitch
provided it is clean
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:36, Reply)

The inner hippy in me would love to volunteer to set up Glastonbury one year.
but it's never going to happen.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:37, Reply)

Wild camping for me.
Which just means a hike, taking a lightweight tent with you, plus some food and water. Find a good spot, cook, wait for dusk and pitch. Up and gone next morning before anyone else gets moving.
Or just take a bivvy bag in summer.
Better along a coastwalk, best in Cornwall.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:19, Reply)

That sounds brilliant
Appart from the lack of toilets, of course.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:27, Reply)

Brilliant it is.
And sometimes I go to Wales
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:34, Reply)

that is nice
generally when I'm camping I have my board with me (9'4"), among other things, so I have to have the car, and therefore all the luxuries I can stuff into it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:31, Reply)

I was just going to strike out 'luxuries' and put 'women' -
when I realised what makes wild camping so good is there are no women.
(Except for the one lucky meeting near Soapy Cove. Heh heh - what happens at camp stays at camp.)
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 16 Jun 2010, 11:43, Reply)

Christ, nicely timed.
After months of organisation and various call offs, on Saturday my pals and I set off to a lovely Loch side spot for some camping, fire building and raving. We packed my friends van full of audio equipment and set off for a night of indulgence. On arriving we drove the van down a semi hidden lane and into the spot itself. It is perfect, lots of wood, plenty of space for cavorting and shamanic shuffling, if required. I set about setting all the audio gear up and the rest fucked off for wood.

There were midgies about, as you would expect, but they were tolerable and in my experience they tend to fuck off at a certain time of night anyway. The rave generator now complete i stuck on some Boards of Canada and it sounded brilliiant. The sub woofer gently pulsing from inside the van made it sound like a mini festival, particularly when you walked away from it. We then began to set the tent up.

It was about then that I decided that the midgies were getting worse, in fact they were practically sending us insane, a mild panic swept through camp as we decided if we should in fact PACK EVERYTHING BACK UP AND GO HOME. What a monumental waste of time it would all be. Even standing OVER the fire failed to discourage them, they still attacked, in their millions it seemed. Seconds later an executive decision was reached to do exactly that. I popped my headlamp on as it was now dusky, perfect time for a midge invasion of biblical proportions. It was only when my friends could see the clouds of midgies in the the light of the headlamp that they really began to freak out. I myself couldn't see as I was too busy disconnecting things and panicking.

Minutes later we were good to go and everyone who looked at me couldn't help but say "Fucking hell man, look at your face". It was bitten red raw, as were my hands, and legs, i counted over 100 angry bites. We got back to my place at midnight, we all just sat down in near silence, completely broken and shell-shocked. I tried to rally things and inhect a bit of, 'we may as well get totally wankered then', but the energy had gone, replaced by misery and scratching. We agreed on one thing though, that if we had stayed, we would have went out of our mind.

In summary, midgies CAN be tolerated, in small numbers, but do a yourself a favour and get a fucking midgie head net, do not get a mosquito net as the holes are too big.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 16 Jun 2010, 13:37, Reply)