Last time, I promise
Remember my sponsored run through London?

uk.virginmoneygiving.com/fundraiser-web/fundraiser/showFundraiserProfilePage.action?userUrl=martinandclaire

Larry Vest was the first person to sponsor us and he suggested I do it in a tutu. Initially I laughed this off, but with the run looming large I have decided that this is actually a BRILLIANT IDEA. So on Sunday I will be running 10 kilometres through London in a tutu. And pictures will only be available to those who sponsor me, like BGB and Larry. Just so you know.

I'll shut up about this now.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:17, 41 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I'm sure if I trawled your facebook
I could find a picture of you in a dress.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:25, Reply)

Probably before he did the run, too

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:28, Reply)

And I'm sure if I trawled your Facebook I could produce enough fwap to encase East Anglia in some sort of hideous manfat cocoon,
but that wouldn't do anything for charity, now, would it.

Anyway, I think - THINK - you might be disappointed in that respect. I tranny up incredibly rarely, I don't think the decriers of my sexuality need the extra ammunition.

And, er, obviously dresses look terrible on me due to my broad, manly shoulders
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:28, Reply)

Only if you have a Penny Crayon obsession

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:30, Reply)

My facebook is pretty devoid of fwap fodder
I'm not photogenic in the slightest. Unless you're a fat fetishist :D
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:31, Reply)

Or, as stated above, a cartoon girl fetishist

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:31, Reply)

That's what attracted Wiggy to me.
He was gutted when he found out I couldn't draw.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:49, Reply)

Unfortunately for you
I am a bit of a leg fetishist. And I also have a thing for girls who can dance. You probably should have been able to suss these points from pics of my girlfriend!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:35, Reply)

ha I can't dance!

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:50, Reply)

I'd love to be able to do what you can do
Seriously. So would Ms Foxtrot
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:53, Reply)

I thangyou
it's not that tricky, it's just strength and ability to withstand pain.

I've got the whiniest girl in my beginners class, she's doing my head in. Every time she tries to do anything she stops in the middle and whines that it hurts. I tried to be sympathetic, then I was more blunt, now I just want to tell her to MTFU.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:56, Reply)

It's supposed to hurt! Isn't it?
From what my very basic experience of pole dancing has led me to believe, the difference between those who can do it and those who can't is fucking impressive arm, core and thigh muscles. Otherwise bloody everyone would do it!
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:57, Reply)

You build it up as you go along so theoretically anyone could have a go
even lolfatties can do it, it just takes them longer to build up enough muscles to support their larger frames. And theoretically they should get thinner doing it.

It does indeed hurt, the friction causes pole burn. But you build up a resistance to it. That is of course unless you insist on stopping every time you get the slightest twinge and then wrapping a bloody jumper around your arm to protect it, thereby losing all grip and stability. Grrr.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:01, Reply)

Yes it hurts
It's exercise, if it doesn't hurt/burn then you're not doing it properly. With pole dancing there are also the bruises, but hanging upside down by your legs is awesome!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:04, Reply)

Christ, you too?
Is it catching?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:08, Reply)

A friend of mine does it, and teaches it sometimes too
A few of us had a laugh on the pole a few times, it's fun! My best trick is running at it, jumping, grabbing, and spinning around it like a loon.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:13, Reply)

Yes, that is the best bit so far :-)
We actually have a pole at home so that Ms Foxtrot can practice. Have only been on it when drunk thus far though
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:15, Reply)

Yes, of course.
It's for the sponsorship.
No, I understand. Charity and all that, good man, very well done.

Also,

those who sponsor me subscribers of Bumder! Magazine
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:29, Reply)

Soooo....
People send you money and in return they get pictures of you running around in a tutu?
Congratulations on the career move - I can't say I am too shocked by it.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:29, Reply)

I'm sure you'd run a lot faster
If John Innman was waiting at the finish line with one hand on his hip, a tub of lube in the other, and a big 'coo-ey!' expression on his face
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:34, Reply)

I'll over look the spelling mistake as it will do nothing for me and resort to strikethrough
John Innman I
waiting at chasing you from
finish start

etc

Alternatively,

Inn Barrow

Hell yeah
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:37, Reply)

What spelling mistake?

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:48, Reply)

There's only two N's in Inman

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:48, Reply)

You'd fucking know, queerface

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:51, Reply)

Hence why I originally left it

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:53, Reply)

It was a deliberate trap anyway
I'm secretly a massive sex pest who would fuck anything, regardless of gender, age, ethnicity or relation
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:55, Reply)

See you on Sunday then?
I sure as hell won't be able to outrun you after a 10K jog
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:56, Reply)

I was doing 10k runs when I was 12
I could easily catch you on any given day
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:01, Reply)

I was playing rugby when I was 12
Not well, I couldn't see a fucking thing without my glasses and it's a stupid game anyway, so I stopped as soon as I could. My point is that 16 years may have passed since you last did a 10K jog
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:10, Reply)

I used to love playing rugby
All that rough and tumble with the boys, and reaching for balls in the scrum...

Mmm...
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:15, Reply)

telling the truth on QOTW?!
stop bucking trends.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:56, Reply)

It was a lie, actually
I wouldn't touch you with a shitty stick
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:58, Reply)

that's good
I wouldn't like to be touched with a shitty stick.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:59, Reply)

With a nose like yours
You ought to be grateful for anything you get
( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:16, Reply)

God you're such a horrible bastard
If you didn't crack me up I'd chase you out of here with a pitchfork and a velociraptor

If it's any consolation, I'd do you, Kitty
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:18, Reply)

b f

trends men.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 11:59, Reply)

Homophobe

( Bert Monkeysex is waiting for the mods to delete him, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:03, Reply)

Ha!

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:07, Reply)

I just like men in women's clothing.

( girlinthehole, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:33, Reply)

At this point in time I don't mind what your motivation is
Thank you very much :-)
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:41, Reply)

Yeah - Run Fat Boy, Run!
And what lovely B3tans splurging out on you like that.
Who said OT isn't the caring, compassionate face of the internets?
Here's another incentive. For every £10 of sponsorship raised I will stay off OT for a day! So hit the target and I'll be gone for over a month.
Remember, Darth doesn't get the dosh - it goes to impecunious picaninnies to provide schools.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Thu 8 Jul 2010, 12:51, Reply)