Confusing and a bit embarrasing
Background: My brother and his friends have come to visit me for a week. So that none of them has to sleep on one of those awful inflatable mattresses, my flatmate (a very nice and sexy French girl) offered to sleep with me on my bed, then they can use her bedroom and all of us will be more comfortable.

Right. Yesterday night, while on her sleep, she came to me, hugged me and kissed me. I told her a couple of nice words and pushed her apart smoothly, so that she didn't wake up.

After that, I had a lot of confusing dreams with her. In fact, I'm not sure if all of them were dreams, as it all felt very real, and I know for sure that a couple of things happened. For example, I dreamt (I think) that she grabbed my hand and made me hug her (you know, as we girls usually do) and I remember having my hand on her tits and thinking on my sleep: "not bad...". Then the phone made a noise (low battery) and I moved back to my side of the bed. Well, the phone did make the noise, and I did move to my side of the bed... was I hugging her or was that just a dream? Mmmmm...

We've done weird dreams before, so to have something different, why are you confused?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:04, 244 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Good Morning Abe.
I really like this story, please can you go into more lurid details. Make them up if you are not sure of exact events.

Thanks.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:13, Reply)

Nonono
This is about being confused, not sexy times. A don't want AB telling me off for writing soft, poor porn.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:16, Reply)

It is not poor porn. It is very well written and just hits the spot.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:21, Reply)

Well...
that's bound to get a few people on here all excited!

So she has nice tits then? :-)
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:13, Reply)

I don't know
It probably was just a dream.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:16, Reply)

Yeah yeah
You're saying that NOW...

It must be a bit odd though. I've never slept with another man, so I can't say I've experienced anything like this. But I can imagine that if I woke up and (for example) he was holding on to me, and poking an erection into my back, I may be somewhat perturbed.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:19, Reply)

Big family + small house
I spent most of my summers sharing single beds with another 2 people, so I'm not new to sharing, and I thought nothing of it when she offered. Now I realised that we were all very young kids or very old grandmas on that bed, and I didn't know anything about sex.

I have woken up being hugged by a guy who wasn't supposed to be hugging me, poking an erection into my back. It's not nice.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:22, Reply)

Yes
Kids can share beds. But as an adult, I've never shared a bed with anyone other than a lady with whom I was having sex with (or at least attempting to!)
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:26, Reply)

The erection in the back thing is so awkward.
He knows it's there. You know it's there. No one wants to mention anything.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:52, Reply)

I know
But us, girls, can't do much about it. If he knows he's got an erection, why is he still hugging me? Does he think I haven't noticed?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:56, Reply)

He's hoping you have noticed
and that you respond in the way he wants.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:57, Reply)

That's stupid
The last thing that an unexpected erection is going to do to us is to turn us on.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:05, Reply)

haha this
it's usually frightening and confusing
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:27, Reply)

Indeed
What it mostly makes us want to do is giggle.
(berk, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:27, Reply)

Or run away as quick as possible

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:40, Reply)

I've shared a bed with girl (friends) and woke up gripping them or vice versa
I think it's simply natural to cuddle whoever you're in bed with (which is why I'd never share with anyone I wouldn't shag!)
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:23, Reply)

This ^ is my concern!
And I agree with DP's solution.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:24, Reply)

Probably right
I feel about weird about it now, and I have another 3 more days of bed sharing.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:28, Reply)

So that's another 3 mornings of stories?
Heh!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:29, Reply)

I hope not
Or I'll be a zombie by the end of the week :)

Or bisexual...
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:31, Reply)

Al will be here soon
and use his 'pictures or it didn't happen' line.

We don't want you turning into a bisexual zombie though.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:32, Reply)

Are you sure?
I would go around the world converting others into it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:38, Reply)

In that case
I must start up a business in the bisexual zombie porn market, as there will shortly be great interest in the genre.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:39, Reply)

Nothing wrong with a bit of boob-squeezing.
Just make sure you post details here so Bart can get his hands sweaty.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:31, Reply)

You are so kind.
I'm sure it won't only be me though.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:33, Reply)

And pictures.
You forgot the pictures.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:34, Reply)

Maybe I should do like Barney in HIMYM
And install cameras all around the house, just in case this happens again, eh?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:39, Reply)

Ha ha!
Can you imagine the traffic on this site if you did that? Thousands of sad individuals staying up all night in case you happened to grab a French girl's tits. Under the duvet. In the dark.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:41, Reply)

Hahaha
It'd be better if we add cameras on the laptops/PCs of the sad individuals, so me and the French girl can laugh at their expectant faces in the morning, after a night of nothing.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:43, Reply)

Hack into their webcams
And post pictures on the internet of them all wanking.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:45, Reply)

I might do
It could prove profitable after all.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:55, Reply)

I had a dream once where I was squeezing a great pair of tits.
I woke up and they were my tits :(
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:18, Reply)

But your tits are great
Can I squeeze them next time I see you?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:20, Reply)

Of course!
They're half the size they used to be, but go right ahead.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:22, Reply)

Thanks!
I'm looking forward to that!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:22, Reply)

I had a dream once where I was squeezing a pair of great tits.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:23, Reply)

And you woke up
to find they were bullfinches.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:24, Reply)

Hey K.
Has science let you down again?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:27, Reply)

Yes it has
Or rather funding for science has let me down.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:28, Reply)

Bah.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:29, Reply)

Indeed
I'm picking up bits and pieces of work though, which together add up to several hundred £ a week, so I'm not going to starve yet!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:31, Reply)

Deja-vu?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:25, Reply)

*facepalms*

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:26, Reply)

I know, I should read the post propperly..

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:27, Reply)

Confusing sub-thread
Mark and I are trying to work out when and where we should be getting the jabs that we need before going to South America. He called whoever it is that explains you that (a branch of the NHS, I think) yesterday afternoon, but they were too busy, so thay said they'd call him later, at around 10pm.

They called him. Later. At 3:10am. Really.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:26, Reply)

You usually get the jabs in your arse.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:27, Reply)

Nope
The gluteos don't absorb it as well as your up tight. That's where you get it.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:30, Reply)

Up tight?
Do you mean what I think you mean?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:31, Reply)

I mean
in your leg, up, up in your leg. Don't you call it tight? I'm going to check, just a sec...
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:35, Reply)

Thigh.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:36, Reply)

Ah, thigh!
I just found it. Well, it's almost the same.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:36, Reply)

Thigh!

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:36, Reply)

Yep, ta
I just found it too. But I had it almost right.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:37, Reply)

I can't criticise
My knowledge of Spanish goes no further than ordering a beer.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:38, Reply)

At least you know something
I'm sure you do it in the polite way, though.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:39, Reply)

Dos cervezas, por favor
Well, that's two beers, but you can have one too.

So what's the rude way?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:44, Reply)

Well, not rude
But we don't say pleas and thank you as you do. That's over polite for us, and makes uf feel uncomfortable, as if you thought you were above us. A bit posh, you see?

I'd say: Me pones dos cervecitas? or just Dos cervecitas (using the diminutives makes things sound nicer)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:45, Reply)

Thanks. I'll remember that next time I'm in Spain.
In countries where I don't know the local language for beer* I have been known to point and hold up the relevant number of fingers.

*Hungary was one, but I did learn it after a while, only to have forgotten it again.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:49, Reply)

That's known as international language
Nothing of that nonsense of Esperanto, when you can use your hands.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:55, Reply)

Where's your up tight?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:32, Reply)

that's not a polite quesion to ask a lady

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:27, Reply)

Mark should have his jabs in his arm.
Your's should be in the posterior.

I'll assist if you like.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:30, Reply)

Thank you
Are you a qualified nurse or doctor?

It's more about the timing. They recommend you to start 7 months before departing, but we have only 4 months left now, so is it better to start the treatment and have half or it done before going, or just leave it?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:33, Reply)

He's got one of those t-shirts which says
"I'm not a gynaecologist, but I'll gladly take a look"
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:35, Reply)

I thought so
I rather go to a proper doctor, you see. I'm that picky.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:36, Reply)

I'm a doctor
Not a medical one though
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:36, Reply)

A doctor in what?

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:37, Reply)

Lurve.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:38, Reply)

Sadly, no
Physics.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:42, Reply)

That's probably for the best
Lurve doctors are not very well paid these days.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:44, Reply)

Neither are physicists
Especially unemployed ones.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:45, Reply)

It's never too late to change career
If you think Lurve doctor will be any better, go for it. You have our support.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:53, Reply)

I've no formal qualifications
Just on-the-job experience. Would that be enough?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:55, Reply)

Probably
Any good references that you can put on your CV?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:57, Reply)

I'm just an interested party, with your best interests at heart.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:38, Reply)

be brea
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:40, Reply)

Those may be the letters I left out.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:47, Reply)

Pfft!
Well I never got groped when we shared a bed : (
( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:37, Reply)

Maybe you should have started as she did
and kiss me. I thought you didn't like me :((((
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:40, Reply)

Is it the French girl I met?
She is very flirty.
( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:44, Reply)

Yes, the same
And I know. She was playing to make Mark jealous with me one night out, and I got quite turned on.

Mark wasn't jealous, as you can imagine.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:46, Reply)

I like flirty French girls
But I'm spoken for, so it's too late.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:47, Reply)

Sorry about that
I'm sure you girl is lovely too.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:49, Reply)

Yes, she is.
Just not French.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:50, Reply)

Well, she could learn it
and speak it to you. It'd be like role playing.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:52, Reply)

She was quite good at speaking French
when we were in France on holiday this summer. Maybe I should ask her to speak it more often!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:54, Reply)

Good idea!
I love people talking to me in foreign languages. Mmmmm
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:57, Reply)

Curious, does that mean English still turns you on, or are you used to it by now?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:58, Reply)

It does
it still feels weird and so smooth... mmmm...
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:00, Reply)

Nice
Btw, I got shouted at by one of my friends this weekend. She's been trying to convince me to go with her to go see Rocky Horror for years, and I've always said no. I informed her I'd agreed (in principle) to go with you and yours if they came to Manchester again, and she hit the bloody roof.

Women eh? You all just complain! ;-)
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:02, Reply)

Hahaha!
Well, they'll be here in November, but Mark and I are going to jump this one, as we're too busy with the wedding preparations. But next year, I'll see you there.

The same happened with my ex. He insisted we had to go and see it, and I always said no. Then Mark told me and I said yes. My ex wasn't happy, so it's not only girls.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:08, Reply)

I'm sure this has already been covered, but where are you going to live after the wedding?
As I can't remember if you'd said you were moving :-(
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:12, Reply)

I am
I'm still trying to find a job, though, so I'm not sure. Probably somewhere between Worthing and London. But don't worry, we'll come up and visit.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:14, Reply)

Good good
Don't think I could go on without my Spanish fix, haha
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:25, Reply)

You are nice
:)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:41, Reply)

I do my best

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:43, Reply)

Jings, hen
Ye're a richt braw lassie!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:59, Reply)

Hahaha
Writen doesn't have the same effect.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:00, Reply)

Which is a good thing
Everyone know French girls don't wash.

Scandinavians are the way forward
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:20, Reply)

needs moar tongue

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:41, Reply)

That's a new one
Sounds like an opening paragraph from a Jackie Collins book. (or whoever the buggery writes erotica for women).

I had a waking dream this morning, I was half awake, and my alarm on my phone wouldn't stop going off. In my dream, it was the countdown on a bomb I was trying to diffuse. It was only after about 5 minutes I realised that the bomb and my phone alarm made the exact same noise, and I snapped out of it. Very odd.

In other news, my sister went into hospital on Friday at 6pm to be induced. The baby finally appeared at 4am this morning. I think she'll want to sleep for at least the next 3 days. She's had a little boy named Noah.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:44, Reply)

Awesome use of the word 'diffuse' there.
Also, happy uncle... ness.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:46, Reply)

Arse.
Cheers!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:51, Reply)

Noah sounds a lot like Noel.
Now every time you hear his name, you'll be haunted by an image of my smiling, sunburned face.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:53, Reply)

That is mildly concerning
On the upside, I already know someone with a son called Noah (I was very tempted to say 'I know a Noah', but decided against it).

It's Spikeypickle, for those of you who remember him.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:56, Reply)

Send him a \o/ from me.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:59, Reply)

Shall do

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:00, Reply)

They induced her
and it still took 3 days?

FFS, WD40 would have done it quicker than that!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:46, Reply)

3 gels it took
I'm not too sure what it means, and that's fine by me
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:52, Reply)

I don't know either
But I'd guess it's the fanny equivalent of an enema.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:53, Reply)

I texted my brother in law, telling him that if the baby wasn't out by tonight, just take in a plunger and get it yourself
He sent me back a laughing text, my sister also read the message, and sent me a text with *ahem* colourful language.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:57, Reply)

You should have given him a calving rope.

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:58, Reply)

Or a hoover

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:59, Reply)

Wow!
More than 3 days giving birth? Ayayay!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:47, Reply)

Who built the ark?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:48, Reply)

Joan.

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:51, Reply)

Angel Gabriel

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:53, Reply)

Evan.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:53, Reply)

Is this girl inclined towards dalliances with ladies?
If so, she may have Anne Franked you!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:54, Reply)

Anne Franked?
Rhyming slang?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:56, Reply)

Nope, just means to have silent sex
Mainly in an attic
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:58, Reply)

Have you read Anne Frank?
There's a bit in it where she decides to grope her friend when she's sleeping next to her.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:01, Reply)

Seriously?
Hmm...might have to give that another read
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:04, Reply)

Yeah I'm sure it's Anne Frank
it was only two sentences or so if I remember from reading it at school. They usually leave it out of most TV adaptations.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:13, Reply)

Really?
I must have missed the titillation as a result of the terror and misery.

Did she slip a finger in?
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:21, Reply)

I don't think so
I think she just reached over, stroked her boob, decided she had more important things to worry about and went to sleep.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:28, Reply)

I imagine the fear of a concentration camp may stunt the libido

( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:44, Reply)

I don't know, have you never seen the shower scene in Schindlers List...? Phwoar!
...What?
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:50, Reply)

*fwap*
that's disgraceful.
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)

Was it written in pencil?

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:24, Reply)

haha
Anne Frank fanfic? I don't think so.

I'm starting to doubt myself now though, I thought someone else might have remembered.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)

According to wikipedia (as I can't really be arsed searching further)
Her father was concerned about her emerging sexuality in the book
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:32, Reply)

I'm not sure
I know she likes boys, but as I said before, playing with me to make Mark jealous, she did go quite far... I thought she was asking for more!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 8:59, Reply)

My best friend accidentally spooned me one night when we were sharing a bed
It was probably just an accident.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:02, Reply)

Spooning is awesome

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:02, Reply)

you brazen hussy
'accidentally' my arse. you were probably leading her on
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:03, Reply)

leading her on getting her off
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:05, Reply)

yeah

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:05, Reply)

she'd just broken up with her boyfriend
I was comforting her.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:13, Reply)

comforting fisting
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:14, Reply)

that's a little crude for this time of the morning!

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:17, Reply)

rude unt
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:21, Reply)

Reckon it gets bigger at night?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:28, Reply)

morning!
I got The Twilight Saga last night on Alchemy and lolled on the train.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:32, Reply)

how very caring of you.
I see that I have got you all wrong.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:15, Reply)

I'm well benevolent.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:18, Reply)

glad to hear it

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:20, Reply)

evolen
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)

I toyed with the idea of doing that

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)

I'm frankly ashamed that you didn't

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:30, Reply)

I like spooning
As long as it's not with a male only-friend sporting an erection :)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:10, Reply)

I assume that doesn't apply to Mark then?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:12, Reply)

Mark is not
only-friend
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:15, Reply)

Ahh, I see your point

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)

I am confused.
This story has me all of a lather. Am I a lesbian?
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:01, Reply)

Nah! You're far too pretty.

( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:08, Reply)

Oh Beegie, you are a flirt!
*Bats lashes and flutters fan*
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:11, Reply)

because I'm hungover.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:19, Reply)

Does it look like you're surrounded by paperclips?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:22, Reply)

I'm going to vomit on my desk,
then fall asleep in it and drown to death.
Then you'll be sorry.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:23, Reply)

I won't be overly sorry
But it's probably best not to do it anyway.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:23, Reply)

Yeah right, you'll all donate to an icon in my memory.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:26, Reply)

it'll be a paperclip
raping a Cylon
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:27, Reply)

I finished watching BSG at the weekend.
HAS ANYONE ELSE SEEN IT ALL I HAVE MANY QUESTIONS!
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:28, Reply)

I have not seen any of it
I may do so at some point
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)

I held off watching it as I'm not much of a sci-fi fan
I wish I'd watched it sooner, it's bloody brilliant.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)

interesting
I love sci fi, and I love things that are brilliant
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:32, Reply)

I've seen it all
Albeit about a year or two ago.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:29, Reply)

I have just gazzed you questions.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:33, Reply)

And that confuses you?
If you drink too much the night before then you're hungover in the morning. Does that explain it?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:23, Reply)

Be nice to me lesbo, I feel like shit.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:24, Reply)

Hahahah

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:26, Reply)

She still hasn't posted a picture of this alledgedly sexy french person, which is mean.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:37, Reply)

This is her

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:42, Reply)

I like her too much
to do something as wrong as putting her picture on here.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:44, Reply)

Just gaz me her picture then
god do I have to think of everything
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:46, Reply)

She's on my facebook
I'll let you guess who she is.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)

You've got a friend with a very french name beginning with C
is that her?
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)

nope
She starts with L
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)

Oh right, I think I know the one,
Her profile pic looks like she's eating her own shoulder.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)

Yes, something like that
You're a good stalker, aren't you?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 10:09, Reply)

Hahaha
You bitch!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:37, Reply)

I had an awesome dream last night
But after reading about your somno-frottagist friend I've completely forgotten what my dream was all about.

I've shared beds with female friends before, and indeed a male friend on a couple of occasions, and never poked the bedpartner with the morning wood. I'm kind enough to unscrew it and leave it in a glass of water on the bedside table.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:27, Reply)

*bokes*
*pokes*
*chokes*
*smokes*
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:31, Reply)

THREADJACK
Bombscare in Trafalgar Square, people being ordered off buses in the Westminster and Pall Mall areas.

Thought you should all know.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:32, Reply)

crazy
let us know when you plan to set them off
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:34, Reply)

When someone gets me a FUCKING CROISSANT

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:35, Reply)

No one cares, Jimbo.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:34, Reply)

I hope your bum gets blow off
you rude man :(
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:34, Reply)

My bum had blow-off once
I cleared the office
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:35, Reply)

Hahahah

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:37, Reply)

I've emailed COBRA
to get you listed as a Weapon of Ass Destruction
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:39, Reply)

I'm willing to bet you sell a product with that subtitle.

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:43, Reply)

I bought one, you've seen the animated gif...

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:46, Reply)

I had it
I gave it away, rather than ever see it again
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:48, Reply)

You can talk, bus-bomber

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:52, Reply)

Have they shot any Brazillian electricians yet?
If not why not?
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:35, Reply)

Wow!

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:38, Reply)

Excellent, I'm going to send an email round to scare my commuter friends.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:38, Reply)

It's not on the news yet

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:39, Reply)

They'll probably leave it till
after rush hour so there's no panic.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:40, Reply)

BUSWANKERS

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:39, Reply)

www.crapgraffiti.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/09/bus-wankers.jpg
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)

haha noice!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 10:05, Reply)

It's now been declared safe.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:44, Reply)

Mein Gott I had a fucking horrendous dream last night
I went to a barber's for a trim and before I knew it the cunt had given me a massive mullet. Worse still, the barber was Shane Ritchie. I also had my ears pierced at the same time.

I was in a blind panic for a split second when I awoke.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:33, Reply)

I thought you already had a mullet?
:/
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:35, Reply)

So, which one are you? (click for bigger)
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:35, Reply)

Second from right, I think.
He looks like a fat Jeff Beck.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:38, Reply)

Too thin!
Left. Far t left.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:41, Reply)

I have recurring dreams where I have a second job and keep bunking off.
I wish I knew what it meant.
( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:36, Reply)

It means that a chicken will peck your eyes out, for eating it's Mummy

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:43, Reply)

Congrats on uncledom, young man.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:46, Reply)

Thank you good sir
This is number 4 now, all lads. Let's just hope I can remember his name and birthday, I'm struggling on the others!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:49, Reply)

Yep, I forgot
Congratulations. You're going to spend a fortune in presents!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:51, Reply)

Thank you
Soon as I get a picture, I'll show you it!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)

Neither of my siblings will ever have children thank Christ

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:51, Reply)

are you like the Sith?
where there can only be a master and a pupil.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:52, Reply)

What the fuck are you blathering on about, you hideous gaylord?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)

good morning to you too, you syphillitic cunt rag.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)

Mornin, Boaby

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:58, Reply)

Morning Sarge.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 10:00, Reply)

Don't fucking swear at me, you pustule.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:58, Reply)

to the tune of here comes the bride: just for Monty
You are a cunt
You are a cunt
Nobody likes you
Cause you are a cunt.

and repeat x
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 10:01, Reply)

He won't sleep with you.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 10:02, Reply)

if you dont ask, chompy!

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 10:03, Reply)

This is the comeback of a 14 year old

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 10:11, Reply)

That's not fair.
Although I can understand why.
( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:52, Reply)

My sister says she doesn't actually want them.
My mother thinks this is a lie/denial - but her husband is older than both me and my brother and is rather set/happy in his ways. They treat their cat like their child anyway.

The little fucker eats better than I do.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)

Oh I thought it was to do with her health status.

( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)

My mother thinks it is.
I'm undecided.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:58, Reply)

Google Calendar makes you less shit.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 10:01, Reply)

What occupation is it?

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:53, Reply)

Always phone work like telesales etc, surprisingly

( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:54, Reply)

Well no wonder you're bunking off
That's a shit job.
Dream you're the body-double for Jeff's lover in his latest film. You'll be prompt every day!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)

At least I wouldn't have to fake anything : )

( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)

Heggzackerly

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:59, Reply)

Ay
I don't know what bunking off means, but you deserve better than telesales.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)

It means not going into work.

( girlinthehole, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)

Oh, I see
I'd do that too. What a boring job that is.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:58, Reply)

France, 1940

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:54, Reply)

Hahahah

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:55, Reply)

:D

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:56, Reply)

*applause*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 5 Oct 2010, 9:57, Reply)