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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1

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just walked home so feeling v smug. and cold.
and it's the new series of the only reality tv show i would ever allow... AMERICA'S NEXT TOP MODEL!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:16, 2 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
I used to be a catalogue model you know.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:17, Reply)
orly??

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:21, Reply)
Yeah!
Plumbers tools bi monthly.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:22, Reply)
did you just call him a bi tool??

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
Yes : )

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:29, Reply)
he seems to be ignoring you. shout!

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:30, Reply)
YES!!!!!

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:31, Reply)
Bi tool?
This is the first time I have been called this. Do I take it as a compliment?
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:31, Reply)
No

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)
the stark simplicity of this answer
made me laugh
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:34, Reply)
So...you were...insulting me?
I thought we were DnB buddies or something.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)
I'm a fickle woman.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:45, Reply)
so.......
just a woman then, aye?
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
yarly
I modelled for Tribalectic, honour.co.uk, Grattan, Saga and Kays.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
really really?!

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
I'm too short for catwalk
And these days, all my manager will put me forward for are Just For Men, and Arran Knitwear.

I'm a shadow of my former dashing self.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:27, Reply)
if true this is quite impressive
i might have to be nicer to you
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:30, Reply)
You just want discount on a twin-set from the Freemans book.
'I'm not paying £1.27 a week for 120 weeks' thinks Swipe.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:31, Reply)
Some times you make me LOL

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)
It's rare though, isn't it Blousie?

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:33, Reply)
Not rare.
Just welcome when it happens.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)
Thanks very much.
(Starts a Blousie laughter chart, awards self first gold star)
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:38, Reply)
note the "sometimes"
i did
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:34, Reply)
What are you most offended by Swipe?
The fact I suggested you'd want a twin-set from Freemans, or the fact I suggested you'd buy in on the 'never-never'?
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:36, Reply)
i really don't know
it was a double stealth missile, that's for sure
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:41, Reply)
*BEAMS WITH PRIDE*

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
You mean stalk me more.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:34, Reply)
i'd be a shit stalker
i can hardly turn on a laptop never mind use it to find you!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)
You are doing it RIGHT NOW
Now please please stop.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:36, Reply)
fine
you are officially on ignore
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:40, Reply)
LIES ON THE INTERNET

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:41, Reply)
sssssssssh.
ignoreboy.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)
lies on the internet

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:45, Reply)

ignoreboy
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:46, Reply)

lies on the internet
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:49, Reply)
you can move this downstairs again now
it's too far over to the right and it hurts my eyes reading your waffle one letter at a time
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
DO IT YOURSELF

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
sometimes
on the very rare occasions when a man won't put out, a girl has no choice.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:54, Reply)
Beggars can't be choosers and all that.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:56, Reply)
i never beg

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:01, Reply)
Lies.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:04, Reply)
i'd be a shit stalker you say
I agree, it took you over a year to find out that someone had stalked a shit out on your spare room carpet.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:42, Reply)
urgh
will you stop reminding me already, makes me want to drive over to kingston and kill her!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:42, Reply)
Hahahaha
Easy pickings.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
At what age did you model?

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
Did you see on the next what happened in the final of the Australian Top Model show?

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:18, Reply)
no, i only allow myself to watch the american one
if it doesn't have tyra making a twat of herself, it's not the same!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:20, Reply)
This'll make you piss yourself
www.youtube.com/watch?v=MqiD0KTZrKE
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:23, Reply)
oh wait
you mean when they announced the wrong winner? my colleague showed me that!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:24, Reply)
I felt really bad for her.
Stupid backwards upside down Australians.

(Sorry, Poppet)
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:25, Reply)
I thought it was funny.
But then, I'm ONE SICK MOTHER.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:26, Reply)
Oh yes you are, Jeff.
Is your name actually Jeff? Out of interest.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:27, Reply)
No. It's not.
It's nothing like Jeff.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:30, Reply)
My real name is also nothing like Lampito

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:42, Reply)
That's mental.
How did you come up with the name?
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)
It's a character in a Greek play
She speaks in a regional accent, is fat and horny and very crude. I thought it was apt.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:53, Reply)
You're Greek?

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:59, Reply)
I do ancient Greek

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:02, Reply)
You seem to have missed an 's' from that post
Grandad fucker.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:05, Reply)
Oi moi!

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:17, Reply)
Does the 'Big Daddy' chant from World Of Sport
*Easy!* *Easy!*
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:37, Reply)
you do fuck dogs though yeah?

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:45, Reply)
Of course.
I go speed-dating in Battersea.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)
Thank fuck for that
you need a few simple truths to cling to in life and you being partial to porking a pekingese is one of mine.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
I don't like Chinese food
But I'll stick my Rodney in a Rhodesian Ridgeback before you can say 'Walkies!'

I actually give myself sweets and take myself off to the woods to meet the puppies I've left there.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:01, Reply)
i really want to know how amberl is getting on with scrabbleboy
also i have houseguests for a whole bloody week from tomorrow. man this is going to annoy me. unless it is someone i am boning, or a friend who is actually living here for a while, i hate guests, meaning i can't just collapse with a book or on here after work, but have to be POLITE and shit.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:31, Reply)
Me too.
She was given top advice earlier.

EDIT: Take no news as 'good' news.

If you know what I mean!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)
dude
i think my cushions know what you mean.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)
I'm really not following you at all.
Your cushions?
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:38, Reply)
Is she referring to her boobies?

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:39, Reply)
first inanimate objects i saw
implying that your comment was so unsubtle even the cushions would understand it.

BK - you're a sick sick man.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:39, Reply)
Thanks!

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:41, Reply)
Gotcha.
You and your crazy legal argument! Cushions. I ask you.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)
the other thing in my eyeline
is houmous. that would have confused you just as badly.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)
Houmous is wisest of all the dips
So I could have believed it.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:46, Reply)
this one is
it's jalapeno houmous. it was excellent.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)
Using the term 'houmousexuals' would have been fun though.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:46, Reply)
I like this

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)
Too little too late I'm afraid.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
Ooh yeah!
Forgot about that.

EDIT - Fuck the guests 'swipe
Come to the bash!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)
oh the guests aren't why i can't make the bash
they're working in london all week, so will have my spare room/keys and can sort themselves out.

boss' leaving do, sadly, my attendance is non-negotiable!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:39, Reply)
It is if he's leaving, surely? :)

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:40, Reply)
she!
no, she is a really really good mate, so.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)
Ah, that's fair enough then
I told my boss at my last job when he announced he was leaving that we were all just going to shit in a box for him.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)
delightful

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:47, Reply)
We didn't get on
And I was in an obnoxious mood :)
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
well no shit sherlock
(see what i did there, did ya, did ya???)
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:49, Reply)
I think so
But I may have to consult the houmous to be sure.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
you can't
i've eaten some and binned the rest (i hate people who put dips back in the fridge, shudder. i am such a dreadful waster of food!)
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:54, Reply)
I want some houmous now :(

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:56, Reply)
it was indeed a nice dinner
2 poppadums and some houmous.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:58, Reply)
Urgh, guests.
I like my solitude.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)
yes
exactly! they just mess it up.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:43, Reply)
I think I could happily live alone with the internet and a cat.
OH GOD WHAT HAVE I BECOME
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:49, Reply)
everyone on here??
except me. i am allergic to teh kittez.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
Sounds great to me

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:56, Reply)
Hifive!
What kind of cat would you like?
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:02, Reply)
I prefer playing minesweeper.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:44, Reply)
I met a guy the other week who boasted that he was the 2nd best at that in the country
I had no response for him. I just wanted to slap him.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
think the comic book guy from the simpsons
"ooohhhhhhhh i've wasted my life"
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
Yeah but I have the same hair and beard as him
and am, only slightly, smaller. People in glass houses and what not.

edot - oooooohhhh I've wasted my life.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:50, Reply)
there are worse people to model yourself on
hitler, for example
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
Swipe
For example.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:51, Reply)
much as you would pay millions
not everyone wants to bone me quite as badly as you!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:52, Reply)
More internet lies

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:53, Reply)
aha
this is how you are trying to get around not doing as you are told and starting a new nice left handed thread. stubborn beast.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:55, Reply)
I didn't start the thread.
I was merely putting you in the same bracket as Herr Hitler.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:57, Reply)
i'd put you in the same shower he used
let's put it that way
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:00, Reply)
You'd gas me?
Well after that jalapeno houmous all you'd have to do would be breather on me.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:01, Reply)
i have just cleaned my teeth ACTUALLY
minty fresh
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:03, Reply)
More lies.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:04, Reply)
fortunately
you are many miles away. therefore you will just have to take my word for it.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:05, Reply)
Yeah, lucky for me.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:07, Reply)
i am not speaking to you again
until you MOVE OVER to the left!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:10, Reply)
You move over.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:11, Reply)
if that is how you speak to all the ladies
i am not surprised you have your bed all to yourself.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:15, Reply)
It's just the way I speak to you, Swipe.
You're special like that.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:16, Reply)
i'm special in lots of ways
some of them don't even involve licking windows
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:20, Reply)
But they all involve special needs.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:21, Reply)
keep your needs out of this

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:24, Reply)
Thought you hated these right handed threads?

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)
YES
sort it
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:28, Reply)
NO

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:30, Reply)

hitler Bert, Monty, TGB, Mandelson, Redknapp
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:52, Reply)
Badum chiiiii
This is my new favourite game. That and Robot Unicorn Attack.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)
What are you supposed to do?

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:57, Reply)
That's the whole point.
You work it out. My last score was 140 :D
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 22:59, Reply)
Well give me a bit of a clue.
I've got wine to drink and people on the Internet to mock.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:04, Reply)
somehow i am sensing this is a dig at me...

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:05, Reply)
Not at all.
If it was aimed at you, it would imply you were 'special' as it is, there are lots of people for me to mock.

The fact your old housemate curled out a steamer on your carpet just makes it easy!

I've been very supportive of the PINK gym purchases have I not?
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:08, Reply)
no!

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:10, Reply)
I've just seen the other dig.
Which I've acknowledge is at you.

The comment above was just a general statement and not aimed at you in the slightest.

Promise.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:12, Reply)
no!

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:15, Reply)
Stop saying 'no!'
Look. Further up the page, I've accused Vampito of being a Greek grandad fucker.

*fears the Swipe hate*
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:17, Reply)
NO!

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:19, Reply)

Does the sad face with the eyes too
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:22, Reply)
nononnononononononononononononononono

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:23, Reply)
Then please accept my apologies if I've offended you.

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:26, Reply)
oh come on. clearly i am just going to say...
NO!
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:27, Reply)
Please.
(I know this'll go so far to the right of the screen you'll eventually says yes to shut me up).
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:36, Reply)
FINE!

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:41, Reply)
So that's a 'yes' then?

(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:42, Reply)
it's a feminine "fine"
you can draw your own conclusions
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:44, Reply)
You need to link lines of colours
clicky clicky funtimes. RUA is incredibly straight.
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:06, Reply)
I'm very hurt by that comment.
*sulks in stupid backwards upside-down-land*
(, Mon 18 Oct 2010, 23:50, Reply)

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