Oh my God we went to see Dick Whittington when I was a kid
and my Nana sees the aging Manchester DJ playing him, and says without an ounce of comic intent "Well that is the wrinkliest auld Dick I've ever seen."
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:12, 1 reply, 15 years ago)

hahahahaha
it's like my grandma solemnly admiring my mother's gorgeous tits. at the bird feeder.

she also said, as we drove past a cat on holiday when i was about 13, "oh i do miss my beautiful ginger pussy."

i miss her!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:16, Reply)

pffffft
She sounds ace your gran does!
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:18, Reply)

bless her, she was utterly oblivious
although some of her other vocab was more embarrassing/racist.

whereas my dad's mum was brilliant. when she turned 80, dad asked her if she wanted a party. she looked thoughtful, and then asked if she could have the money to go on holiday with her mate instead.

and she did. the pair of them had 3 weeks in tunisia!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:25, Reply)

My grandmother
once woke up in the middle of the night whilst staying at my parents' one Christmas, to find my my brother at the foot of the bed getting his cock out.

He was half asleep and blind drunk and had taken a wrong turning on the way to the lavatory. If she hadn't woken up he'd have pissed all over her.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:20, Reply)

my brother me
his my
he I
had taken a wrong turning on the way to the lavatory wanted a wank
he I
pissed wanked
(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:22, Reply)

oh, ally pally
so much effort, for so little reward.

(i've known men like this before)
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:26, Reply)

Except the men you know would have shat on their grandmother instead.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:29, Reply)

i wish this were not so true

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:36, Reply)

We don't.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:38, Reply)

I could say the same about all your recent facebook photos
I settled down, cock in hand, for a good perve, and they were completely insufficient for the purpose!
(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:30, Reply)

are you calling me fugly?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:36, Reply)

Not at all
I like your latest profile pic, I'm just saying there were a lot of photos to go through, and none of them contained your tits, or even any cleavage.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 1 Dec 2010, 10:41, Reply)