What was the last thing my mum did for you, and how much did she charge?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 3 Sep 2014, 22:18, 3 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

World War III is coming
Most of us will be conscripted into service. Are you looking forward to it? Have you ever done any military service and have any good stories? Failing that, some of your grandad's war tales?
(Baggenfrock get fucked, Wed 3 Sep 2014, 20:24, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

Where would you like to go on holiday and how would you prove that you were there?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 3 Sep 2014, 14:30, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

Who do you love and why?
Get really loved up. It can be anyone from here or in real life. Just put that love in so hard that they cry through their penis or gush from their strange.
( $$ ✅, Wed 3 Sep 2014, 8:26, Reply)

What's your most amazing coincidence?
One evening myself and my wife decided to drive to visit for the first time a "famous" pub just outside Buxton, even though it was 45 miles from home. We walked in to be greeted by my wife's best friend, who'd decided, on a whim, to drive to visit for the first time the same "famous" pub just outside Buxton, even though it 45 miles from home - in the opposition direction to us.

What's your most face-slapping coincidence?
(jrd, Tue 2 Sep 2014, 23:13, 6 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Who do you hate and why?
Get really stuck in. It can be anyone from here or in real life. Just put that boot in so hard they cry blood.
( $$ ✅, Tue 2 Sep 2014, 8:35, 5 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

If there was a Eurovision Mong Contest...
Who would you nominate to represent each country??
( arsefez is back, Mon 1 Sep 2014, 15:23, Reply)

u ok hun?

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 29 Aug 2014, 19:07, 4 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

misheard/misunderstood
my niece has been begging for a hamster (pointless little shit*) for years. she has finally been allowed to get one for her birthday. her grandfather was horrified when she announced that it would be called "nipples". in fact, she'd said "nibbles". what have you misheard or misunderstood, with truly hilarious consequences?

* the hamster, not the niece
( rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 12:01, 8 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

What's you favourite part of b3ta? I like BAFR best.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 8:33, Reply)

tell us about that time

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 28 Aug 2014, 8:26, 2 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Things you did as a kid
that you cannot remember but have been reminded about all your life by the insufferable cunts that brought you up.
( spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Wed 27 Aug 2014, 16:04, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

If you could be responsible for
creating a famous piece of art, be it music, film, painting, photography etc. what would it be and why?
( arsefez is back, Tue 26 Aug 2014, 15:09, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

Where do you see yourself in five years time?

( $$ ✅, Mon 25 Aug 2014, 16:31, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

dogs in tights

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Sun 24 Aug 2014, 14:23, Reply)

Have you ever lied on your CV?

(Good evening Good evening, Sun 24 Aug 2014, 13:48, Reply)

How would you sum up b3ta?

( $$ ✅, Wed 20 Aug 2014, 16:35, 9 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Hitchhiking
Tales of trying to get around for free
( social hand grenade I was a lurker before you were a lurker, Sun 17 Aug 2014, 11:54, Reply)

What would you rather?
I've just heard the hardest 'what would you rather' question ever, and I'd either like to hear your answer, and your justification, or a harder question to answer... so here goes.

(If you're a woman, just swap mum/girlfriend for dad/boyfriend)

You're mum and your girlfriend have had their brains and voices swapped, so although it looks like your mum, it's actually your girlfriend (and vice versa).

In order to fix this problem, you have to sleep with one of them. Which one would it be?
( HoratioFellatio Taking the the out of psychotherapist, Sat 16 Aug 2014, 13:46, 4 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Suicide
If you were going to kill yourself, how would you do it?
Just hypothetically, like?
( Zuowan, Fri 15 Aug 2014, 5:44, 3 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

Cougars II.
Tell us the heartwarming tale of how you totally got off with someone way younger than you in an entirely non-creepy fashion.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 14 Aug 2014, 19:44, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

You screamed "Give us liberty or give us death!" - now you've got both, what do you want next?

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 13 Aug 2014, 13:13, 1 reply, 11 years ago)

Holidays
Are you on holiday right now?
Why not spoil it by spending the whole trip liveblogging the experience on b3ta?
Or maybe you hate your friends and/or family and prefer to be called a prick by strangers on the internet.
Either way, everyone's a winner.
Or not a winner, that other thing.
( Zuowan, Sun 10 Aug 2014, 15:07, Reply)

Doctor Shambolic.
Tell us about the time YOU wanked over pictures of QFTW's greatest ever poster.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Thu 7 Aug 2014, 10:37, 8 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

I come here looking for money and end up leaving with love. Now you've left me with nothing.
How'm I gonna get through?
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 20:18, Reply)

what do you want to make those eyes at me for
if they don't mean what they say?
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 11:34, Reply)

go fuck yourself?

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 11:04, Reply)

Why do dogs suddenly disappear every time mods are near?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 6 Aug 2014, 10:31, Reply)