Best or worst school/anywhere fight!
I've seen some right lame fights in my time, from gay slapping boys (kids who cant keep their fist staight while punching) to huge bully gets chased and repetedly punched in the head by small syphco kid. Not forgetting classic grapple fans, two kids both in head locks rolling about, and pissed people in a keebab house who try and throw the heaviest punch in the world and spinning round in a comedy manner.

Tell me of your fight stories, with fisty cuff's detail, and place and loction, dont forget the gobby bi-stander girl friend!
(ruud316, Fri 17 Feb 2006, 9:44, Reply)

What have you done that will condemn you to fiery hell for all eternity?
Ever done something totally unforgivably awful that practically guarantees you a place in the fiery pits of hell with Satan prodding a toasting fork in your arse?
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Thu 16 Feb 2006, 19:19, Reply)

Places you have knocked one out.
This is a game started by a mate years ago.

Since its birth i have managed many interesting places. I'll enlighten you all if you choose this qotw.

Where was your most adventurous wank?
(beebolbod for those that are hard of hearing - LISTEN, Wed 15 Feb 2006, 13:34, Reply)

most interesting
journey
( Neon Blue Ah ha ha haa! I feel positively capital!, Wed 15 Feb 2006, 13:03, Reply)

Worst Ever Cafes
My life is spent searching for the perfect cafe...which has led me into some dives throughout England, and always being too polite to leave I always order and sit it out!
(Pope Benedict XVI, Wed 15 Feb 2006, 12:02, Reply)

What
is the most expensive thing you have ever broken? I was reading a story on BBC about a guy who broke some priceless 17th century Chinese vases in a museum. Can anyone top that?
(inscrutable no use in these temperatures, Tue 14 Feb 2006, 19:31, Reply)

I can't believe I ever...
was attracted to/slept with...someone. Eg if you used to think David Hasselhoff was the sex, or an ex-boyfriend who turned out to be a bit of a loon.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Tue 14 Feb 2006, 11:37, Reply)

What was the phrase that got you fired/arrested/etc?
Did you drag your boss out of the closet? Admit sleeping with your local constable's wife? Tell us.
( ArthurTheRat, Sun 12 Feb 2006, 19:51, Reply)

I just found a witchety grub reclining in the middle of my lounge whilst supping my breakfast tea.
I also woke one day to discover the kitchen floor was covered in very tiny maggotts, which I (not as carefully as I would have if I'd known) tiptoed through them to get the kettle on, thinking they were grains of rice.
What are your most surreal moments?*



*must be true
(spida, Fri 10 Feb 2006, 21:08, Reply)

What can't you deal with?
Not the obvious stuff - like spiders or bricks falling on you - you know, things that many people have trouble with, but the weird stuff.

As an example, I cannot touch balloons after about a week. You know, when they get a bit wrinkly and horrible, just turns my stomach. Can hardly even bear to look at them.
( esganorp has no hummus, Fri 10 Feb 2006, 0:56, Reply)

Celebrities
I think we are anonymous so therefore libel/slander is out the window. So, give up the dirt on a 'celebrity' that you met or know.

They deserve - bastards!

To get the ball rolling I got a back stage hand shandy off Donita Sparks of early 90's punkettes L7(ask your dad.)
(DrTugnut, Thu 9 Feb 2006, 18:08, Reply)

Valentines Day Disasters
I once made a girl burst into tears and run out of a club on Valentines day, accusing her amongst other things of being a cockteasting bitch.

She was the subject of my long planned Valentines day treat earlier. The details are too embarassing to go through, although the whole pre-making her cry thing was top notch!

Seasonal isn't it, the season of valentines day.
(oseany, Thu 9 Feb 2006, 9:26, Reply)

Secrets
I think I should find another job.

We had a "team building" day yesterday as we have had a new starter (Head of Legal UK) whose management skills are more akin to those found in a Primary School playground than those that should be in evidence in a mature organisation. An event of utter pointlessness made only partially bearable by making mischief.

At one point, shortly before it all ended in acrimony, we were told to write a secret about ourselves and put it in a hat. The organiser was to then extract the secret and we all had to work out whose secret it was.

I must say I was utterly honest (for a change) and wrote my secret on my card and put it into the hat. As you know I don't have a great deal of imagination so my secret was very obvious.

I had no idea that, distracted by her slight manliness appearance, her obsession with her femininity and her coltish flirtation so many people would guess that my secret was actually the secret of the new Head of Legal UK.

After all, I really was born a man and have a beard to prove it.

I really don't think that these team building exercises are a good idea at all.

What secrets do you have?
(Mediaslut, Thu 9 Feb 2006, 7:56, Reply)

what wierd things do you like to eat?
er..that's it really. i like to eat raw pastry what about you?
(fuck_a_duck, Wed 8 Feb 2006, 20:55, Reply)

things you've seen and wish you hadn't.....
.....parents shagging etc etc.
(Hotshot, Wed 8 Feb 2006, 11:53, Reply)

What's the stupidest thing you've ever been asked?
Oh Sorry!
( Big Ian has stopped changing his sig, Tue 7 Feb 2006, 15:30, Reply)

most romantic moment
Seeing as it's Valentines Day next week why not tell us about the most romantic thing you've ever done or that anyone has done to you. I'm sure I'm not the only person who do with a few tips on this subject (ah-hem). and we all love it when b3tans show their soppy side!
(Lucy Van Pelt embracing ginlovers, Tue 7 Feb 2006, 14:24, Reply)

What really funny/embarassing thing has happened to you?
Once a really funny/embarassing thing happened to me. Has anything really funny/embarassing happened to you too? Why not tell everyone about it?
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Tue 7 Feb 2006, 1:53, Reply)

what scared you as a kid?
all those silly stories of monsters in the cupboard and under the bed. for me, it was the old lady that hid in the cupboard under the sink in the kitchen - i was convinced she'd try to grab me every time I went in there for a jar of ham or something - turns out she was just my great aunt who liked small dark spaces.
( mrlogic is copying your beard, Mon 6 Feb 2006, 18:20, Reply)

Microsoft Cock Dodgers
When will Microcock give us an option in MS Outlook not to send attachments as MS Mail notes!!!! Which no one else can sodding read!!!!!

OK What really gets under your skin and mikes you want to bite chunks out of your desk!
( Big Ian has stopped changing his sig, Mon 6 Feb 2006, 15:49, Reply)

Quitting in a blaze of glory
We've all had those jobs that suck. Most of us have quit a job at sometime. Some go quietly, some go out in a blaze of glory.

What's your quitting story, where you told your boss where to shove it?
(Kaer, Mon 6 Feb 2006, 2:24, Reply)

Bets
What is the strangest/weirdest/grossest thing you have done for a bet?
(tootlepip, Fri 3 Feb 2006, 18:23, Reply)

Jammiest bastard
who is the jammiest bastard you know?
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Fri 3 Feb 2006, 12:37, Reply)

Exaggerrated lies
ever told a little white lie...then had to elaborate on it to avoid telling anyone that you lied in the first place?

i know i have...like the time when i bull-shitted facts to impress my (smarter -than-me) mates,this info got passed on to the girl i fancy and i spend half an hour blagging said lie just to get in with her...worked till she caught on a few days later
(Just Harry What should I put here?, Thu 2 Feb 2006, 17:25, Reply)

One Liners
On my 21st Birthday, at 5am, I was being copiously vomitus in my uni back garden. Girlfriend of the time leans out the window asking "you're not being sick are you?" "It's alright" I reply, between heaves, "I'll brush my teeth first"

Ok, that's rubbish, but there's got to be some great ones out there.
(Maker of Dreams, Wed 1 Feb 2006, 17:21, Reply)

best /worst things that have happened to you or you have
done while on work experience! I have loads, ( that I have done to others!)
(djgalaxe, Wed 1 Feb 2006, 16:50, Reply)

Your most desperate moment
be it sexual, cigarette, or toilet related. What have you done out of sheer despiration?
( DeSpong currently knitting your suggestions - see profile, Wed 1 Feb 2006, 3:27, Reply)