been doing stints as
a volunteer advisor at the citizen's advice bureau on and off for a few months now. As part of the training in addition to dealing with benefits, homelessness, consumer rights and immigration we also spend a fair amount of time with debt. Which includes getting a plastic bag of bills plonked on the desk which we have to sort in order of priority and list up a plan of action for the client.

Of all the options and scenarios with clients in serious debt the option of going to a loan firm (those happy clappy ones with the pastel coloured adverts on daytime TV with the smiley actors) never came up. Ever. There is no debt that cannot be negotiated down first without recoursing to lumping them all together and paying off an even bigger sum over a longer time.

also prioritise bills , negotiating your council tax first (prison offence).

Baliffs working for debt agencies have nowhere near the amount of powers they claim. they operate and are successful by relying on your fear and ignorance of the law.

Negiotiate under every circumstance with the agencies you owe your debts . We even have a special password with councils when we operate on behalf of a client we use to get serious debts paid off for as little as £3.25 per week - but you need to come in to see us for us to do it for you. Courts look more favourably on you if you sincerely seek remedy to clear your debts. And most times it can be negotiated -they are only humans on the other end of the phone after all (most times). Charm works wonders.

Learn the Sale of Goods Act 1979 and Supply of Goods and Services Act 1982 word for word, parrot fashion to quote to shop managers . You may feel like Raymond from Rain Man as you do it, but you will save yourself a fortune in replaceing faulty/ not fit for purpose goods.(I noticed one shop assistant last christmas telling customers they only had 1 month to return the item as he was handing them their receipt - bollocks they do) . Also if they say they can only replace teh faulty item if you still have the till receipt, proof of purchase can also be your card statement. So bollocks to that too.

The CAB is independant, free, confidential, a registered charity and every one in there is working for nowt, not a sausage (apart from senior management and certain specialist legal advisors). They do it for no pay because they genuinely care. A rare group of individuals from all walks of life, whom I consider it a privilege to work along side - they will bend over backwards to work on your behalf. - use it, support it - it's there for you (and they are always looking for volunteers)

and most importantly we have a social policy aspect which puts the breaks on legislation that most of the public aren't even aware of. You have no idea how much draconian shit would be passed if this thin line was not here to hold back the tide and challenge it.

Things I give advice on outside of my role within the CAB (obviously), just to confirm (for the trolls), the information now following is stuff I do not advise clients on within my role within the CAB and it has no connection with it :

TV licence - you are not obliged to answer any questions or confirm your name or address to the inspector - politely and respectfully close the door on them - they can do fuck all to make you pay this ridiculous tax (and if you're into papier mache or have a kitty litter tray which needs lining why not recycle and put their endless dickless threat letters to good use?)
EDIT: Youtube: How to deal with the TV Licence Inspector, filmed encounter By Kroaky

this goes for anyone who is claiming authority over you who asks you your name - simply ask "am I obliged to answer you" - if they say yes - ask them to tell you under what law. Then read off the definition of an 'act' and 'statute'. Which includes you needing to give consent for the act to be used on you.(you do this unknowingly by giving your name btw - the name on your birth certificate- as the registration process of your birth certificate created the legal joiner between you and your 'person'(corporation). The legal instrument they use to convince you statutes have power over you - understaning this makes all the difference -EDIT: link as a short intro for the curious (specifically the section from 1 min 31 seconds to 3 min 50 seconds) and this (specifically the bit at 4 min 55 seconds) - if you want to get really serious buy a legal dictionary (Blacks 5th) and get into the actual definitions of the language they are using against you. Legalease isn't english. Do not assume those words mean what you think they mean. Inigo Montoya had a point.

As a caveat to this however...if you have caused harm or loss to another human being you are lawfully obliged to cooperate with a peace officer and you get all you deserve as far as I'm concerned

UK Census 2011 - likewise, no communication = no fine for non compliance, they can do fuck all. do not fall for the intimidation. it relies on your ignorance of the law and fear. If you want to safe guard your privacy and ID have nothing to do with this kind of bollocks. There are no reassurances any company can give to keep your intimate personal details safe from leaks, hackers or just plain ineptitude (leaving the memory stick on the frigging tube).

water bills - even if you don't pay they cannot cut you off - it's a basic human right

When a private debt collection agency 'buys' the debt from the bank it has then cleared the debt. It is now a third party private company trying to recoup the money it bought your debt for. This alone should be a big enough clue -

EDIT - Bills of Exchange Act 1882: You are not lawfully bound to pay anything which is unsigned www.legislation.gov.uk/ukpga/Vict/45-46/61 debt collectors buy debts in some estimates for less than 10p in the pound, after the bank writes the debt off. Under the Bills of Exchange Act 1882, the debt agency is actually paying off the debt when they buy it. They then trick you into creating a new contract with them by asking how much you could pay. When you agree (i.e as little as £1 per week)- they now have a contract with you, where none existed.
( Clay hopes this bit is long enough to promote my websi, Tue 15 Nov 2011, 21:01, 11 replies)

Look after the pennies.
Then, when the bailiffs come because you haven't paid any of the pounds, keep them at bay by pelting them with an apocalyptic rain of pennies.
( .Yeti., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 12:14, 7 replies)

Save the cost of the Daily Mail
by finding the angriest tramp you can and asking them what they think of the darkies.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 13:45, 7 replies)

Relocate your family to Ethiopia
Apparently you can feed and educate a child for less than five pounds a month.
( Muns, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 1:20, 1 reply)

Save money on expensive batteries
Only put them in clocks when you need to know the time.
( Ya What Skiddlyboop, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 10:58, 2 replies)

Don't buy an iPhone.
This isn't anything to do with saving money, it's just that people with iPhones are wankers.
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 17:51, 1 reply)

so times are hard, true. lets just makes sure prudent doesnt become mean
pea on the topic of mean fuckers

I'll try not to rant (much). I have a problem with meanness. Not your Mr Trebus types who have known real suffering then spend the rest of their lives so damaged they're unable to throw anything away. www.guardian.co.uk/news/2002/oct/05/guardianobituaries Neither would I dare criticise anyone on a slender budget trying to eke their funds out appropriately – God (and the bank manager) only know I could do with some of that thriftiness. I’m the first to admit I am as my sister puts it a ‘scatter cash’. I earn a good living, to some, a small fortune - all of which I invest in having a bloody good time with my wife and child. I know I’m rubbish with money but at least I know how to enjoy myself. Boom and Bust – ‘no pockets in a shroud’ ‘you’re a long time dead’ says I.

Tightwads? I hate the pettiness of it all - often causing embarrassment or offence over a few coppers. In fact (and this WILL annoy the tight arsed fuckers) if I’m tidying around I often chuck coppers in the bin. I hate the smelly pointless things – what’s worth buying that costs 1p? You're right – fuck all! No one is duped by 4.99 - it’s a bloody fiver. I hate copper coins. If it weren’t for the fact I’d look like an arrogant prick, I’d refuse them in my change. Those ‘leave a penny’ trays in garages are brilliant. As are charity tins. I know I’m not going to take the damn things back out of the house and the time it takes to count and bag a tenner’s worth of those fetid little buttons is time that frankly I am not prepared to waste.

Personally I can’t be arsed with designer trappings and all that crap, but I eat and drink well and enjoy a comfortable standard of living. I like cars for the driving pleasure "Oh! its only got two seats - its not very practical is it?" It’s my money why shouldn’t I? Isn’t that the reason we all slog away in jobs when we’d rather be sitting on a beach somewhere pleasantly expensive?

My real issue is with people who are simply mean just for the sake of it and really relish the miserable self-denying drudgery of it all - like this bloke who posted on his petrol penny pinching (literally). What is the point of a supposedly money saving activity that takes up more precious time and resource than the meager fiscal reward it generates? Gloating over a tenner saved annually by consistently fiddling 2p from every trip to the petrol station just singles you out as plain sad www.b3ta.com/questions/tightwads/post286023 hovering over the pump pissing off the queue behind just to get just that extra 2p for free. Life is actually too damn short. I simply can’t understand the attitude of those who scrimp their dull little lives away, swathed in Rigsbyesque knitwear shuffling around gloomy damp homes only to leave the loot to some bunch of crass distant relatives who immediately spunk it on UPVC faux Georgian conservatories and trips to Torremolinos – which no doubt would have the (newly) poor old stiff whirling in their laminate 'budget' coffin grave had they known what would happen to their carefully accrued funds.

But they are NOT harmless old goats. For example - people who don’t tip appropriately don’t deserve to eat out. I live [edit] used to live in Dubai, it’s a real eye-opener – it seems to bring out the worst in people. There are rich people here sure, but its the tightwads that would love it. Labour is dirt cheap. There is also a very apparent class structure (people can also be quite openly racist). But the penny pinching abuse of those who can be abused is staggering. There are people here who subsist on truly appalling wages – I leave, what to them, seems like huge tips because I am lucky enough to be able to afford to. I do it quietly and anonymously where ever possible. I have had to bite my lip in disgust at the attitude of people over here. “fuck em – he’s only and Indian, bung him a Dirham” (about 65p) a fucking Dirham! for waiting all night on a bunch of braying obnoxious drunken ex pats paying more for a pint than they earn a day? Is that the world the Tightwads want? I had some poor Indian bloke shuffle up to me recently and spin me some yarn he had been injured on a building site – he then proceeded to lift his shirt to display some alarming cobbled together chest drain and bandage tomfoolery while clutching an empty pack of medication for good measure. I guessed at the time it was a scam, but fuck it, I gave him the money anyway – if his life is so shite he has to stoop to that then as far as I am concerned he can have the cash regardless - I cant see him using it to refurbish his yacht.

There are many sorry tales on here of tea bag recyclers, those who drive miles to save a few pence on fuel and those who have inflicted their tightfisted misery on their families to the extend of driving them apart.

If you must fritter your life away worrying you may have recklessly squandered the odd penny or half pint of sour milk – at least do it at your own expense (or lack of it). Don’t inflict your embarassing tight-fisted gloom on friends and family. You’ll end up wealthy miserable and alone.

Sorry for the rant. Flame away – probably the only heat you get.
( spimf ™ is whoever you want him to be, Sun 13 Nov 2011, 1:53, 34 replies)

Save money when robbing a bank. Tenuous.
1# find a cheap clown wig from pound shop.
2# put on some cheap make up and only wear a thong and home made nipple tassels. (Saves on clothes)
3# Steal a goat and a can of fluorescent paint
4# Steal a van and use old newspapers (Mashed) to make it look like a giant cock.

The plan:

Carry the goat in one arm and while in the bank fuck the goat and throw the paint over the walls, all the time ripping up pages of a phonebook and swearing your head off.
After getting the money take a shit on the floor and piss everywhere. Then escape in the van shaped like a giant cock.

You save money on your robbery and I would like to see fucking Crimewatch stage a reconstruction of that.
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 13:07, 5 replies)

Save £1000's...
Bit of a long-term one...

You will need:
1) Standard 'repayment' mortgage.
2) Interest bearing 'savings' account.
3) Job that pays more than you usually spend.

At the end of each month, bung as much as you can, of any spare cash you have, into the savings account.
Your mortgage will have an 'anniversary', at which point (Debt + Interest - Repayments = New Debt) will be calculated along with your new repayment rate.
About one month prior to this, empty the savings account (maybe leave £0.01 in it, just to keep it ticking over) and use the money to make a "CAPITAL REPAYMENT" on your mortgage. This reduces the Debt figure in the above calculation and, therefore, reduces the new repayment rate - which means you will have MORE spare cash to bung into the savings account so that, at the end of the next year...

Note that there may be a 'penalty' for doing this in the 'early' part of the mortgage (usually the first four years) - you need to do the maths to see if it's worth it; but once this period is over it DEFINITELY IS worth it.

Over time, you will pay off your mortgage years, perhaps even decades, earlier and will save literally thousands of pounds.

Mortgage companies HATE this.
I've done it, it works and I LOVE it.

(Apologies for lack of teh funneh)
(minimalist ..., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:36, 5 replies)

Van drivers. Save money on fuel costs.
1. First buy a premium rate phone number.
2. Display it on a sign which says, 'HOW'S MY DRIVING?'
c. Attach to rear of van.
4. Drive like a cunt.
5.
6. profit
(Unconcerned of Tunbridge Wells got to be innit to winnit, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 16:19, 6 replies)

save money on bread
by disguising yourself as a duck and sitting in the pond in the park where the lonely old people go for a walk.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Sat 12 Nov 2011, 10:13, 3 replies)

Save money on expensive video games
by just running round your garden with a stick and using your imagination.
(mr-lizard Hell's teeth man!, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 23:52, 3 replies)

Save money on condoms by simply turning them inside out and reusing.
OR:
Save money on condoms by having a vasectomy
Save money on vasectomies by cutting your balls off with a stanley knife.
Save money on stanley knives by just sharpening a butter knife and calling it stanley.
(Mortal Wombat., Thu 10 Nov 2011, 18:35, 4 replies)

Check your receipt
My money-saving tip may be obvious, but it's worth remembering; Always check what you've been charged. And try not to be put off by the Herculean task of getting a refund. Bought a bag of frozen chips from Tesco the other day, priced £1. As it was in amongst a load of other stuff, I didn't pay too much attention to the prices ringing up as the cashier flung everything over the scanner. It was only once I got outside that I checked the receipt and discovered the robbing sods had charged me £2.20 for £1's worth of chips. More than double! Cheeky scrotes.

Of course, the fun part comes when you try to get your money back. Whilst Tesco make the paying-for-stuff part super-efficient, training staff to whizz a trolley-load of shopping through the scanner like passport checks under Theresa May (whoop, biddapolitics etc), getting them to fix the cock-ups is slower than passport checks in a decommissioned military airport on the outskirts of Slovenia (or, as Ryanair call it, 'Bristol East').

First you have to queue at Customer Services, waiting as two overwhelmed and utterly miserable 'team members' deal with angry customers trying to return badly-shat duvet covers and pairs of high-heels stained with Blue WKD vomit. When you finally reach the desk, you explain to the harassed assistant what the filthy rob-dogs have charged you for the chips, and what they should've cost. With a hefty sigh which knocks over a passing pensioner, the assistant takes your receipt, takes your chips and ambles off to the far side of the store (as the growing queue behind you audibly plots your murder).

Ten minutes later, she returns with a face as grim as Jordan's soul. You cast your mind back and try to remember whether you asked her to check a price, or whether you accidentally asked her to see if she could fit a whole dog up her arse. Without a word, she jabs a few keys on her till. She scribbles something on your receipt. She mutters a curse under her breath, something to do with a pox and your genitals. She then hands you some coins to refund the difference. There is no eye contact, no words of explanation, just the cold, resentful handover of chips and coins. It's like the returning of belongings after a particularly harrowing break-up.

You decide it's probably best not to ask about the 'Double the Difference' refund policy displayed behind her.
(costas, Mon 14 Nov 2011, 15:13, 4 replies)

When feeding ducks in the park,
soak your bread in Rohypnol. That way you get a free dinner, and you can do what you like to it before you pluck it.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Thu 10 Nov 2011, 20:01, 1 reply)

Learn how to do stuff for yourself.
As Mr Loon says, learn how to fix your car. It's not hard. One of the most profitable jobs that garages do is replace the front brake pads and discs. You can do this yourself, in your driveway or even sitting at the kerb on a quiet street, with simple tools, in an afternoon. A very tea-breaky afternoon, at that. Well, unless you've got a newish Mercedes, when you need the diagnostic computer to release the brakes so you can work on them. But you bought an old car so you could fix it yourself, right? *And* running an old car is better for the environment.

Learn how to cook. Seriously. Stir-in sauces may be quick and easy but they are sugary salty crap. You can make far better stuff yourself. They're mosty just some sort of gloopy sauce base and flavourings anyway. How hard do you think it is to chop up an onion and some garlic, blast it in a pan, chuck some meat in and cook that, pour passata over it and stick it on some pasta?

Don't use a breadmaker. Learn how to make bread. Mix up most of a bag of bread flour, a sachet of quick-acting yeast (the really fine dusty stuff), a biggish pinch of salt, a wee drop of veg oil and enough water to make it doughy. Chuck the rest of the flour onto a clean worktop and then knead it until it's all smooth and stretchy - you'll see the change happen really quickly after a couple of minutes. Let it rise in the bowl somewhere warm with a clean dishcloth over it, then punch it in the middle and it'll sink. Split it into greased loaf tins and bung it in the oven for half an hour. You can do everything up to the oven bit last thing at night then switch the oven on in the morning, and it'll still work. You can add stuff like cheese or seeds or chopped onions and peppers to your dough, to make groovy speciality bread that costs a fortune in Waitrose.

You know the best bit about home-made bread? When you take it out of the oven, leave it for a minute or two to settle, then slice off the end, slather it in butter, and eat it with a nice hot cup of tea.

Like beer? Brew beer. Beer kits are cheap. Bottles are cheap, and reusable. Bottle capping tools are not especially cheap but last forever. It takes two weeks to be drinkable, and anything up to a couple of months to be *really* good.

Learn how to fix stuff. Fix your PC, fix your TV, fix your satellite dish. The great thing about that is people will actually pay you to do all this, in cash or possibly just pay you in beer. It's easy and you just need some fairly simple tools, a bit of ability - and you need to be able to sit down and read the instructions, or hit Google.

Grow your own veg! Even if you haven't got a garden, you can grow herbs in pots. Tomatoes grow well in south-facing windows, and taste much nicer than shop-bought ones. They don't need a lot of looking after, but remember to nip out the tiny little leaves that grow up otherwise you won't get much fruit.

Do you know what saves you the most money of all?

By the time you've done all this, you're too knackered to spend any.
(gordonjcp, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 18:40, 9 replies)

At the end of the working day, stay late, and tap out the contents of your colleagues keyboards into a Tupperware container. Free Bombay Mix!

( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:26, Reply)

GENTLEMEN! Learn essential man skills!
1: Learn to cook for yourself! Cook in large portions, freeze it down.
2: Learn to sew on buttons and darn socks.
3: Blag your way to a better job by cultivating a fine moustache, then apply for jobs that are far above your current station. Then, if you're asked a question at interview that you've no clue how to answer, put you chin in your hand, stroke your moustache in an authoritative way and say: "I'm afraid I'd have to think on that'. They will take you for a solid, reliable thinking man, and hire you on the spot.
4: Tan your own leather to make your own shoes. Fresh hides can be found by stalking local truck stops at night with a bottle of chloroform and a hunting knife.
5: When the police come for you, scream defiance and brandish an empty shotgun at them. When a police sniper finally shuffles you off this mortal coil, not only have you saved the money you'd have spent on shotgun cartridges blowing yourself away, but all future medical expenses from then on.
6: When in hell, ask for a private furnace. You won't get it, but it gives you a negotiating position to start from. I'll see you there.
(universalpsykopath loves what you've done with your hair., Fri 11 Nov 2011, 16:58, 7 replies)

This one caused a bit of moral outrage last time I posted it......
Weigh everything as onions (or as I've found out since, carrots).
Those self service tills in the supermarket. You know the ones, you do the scanning and packing for the place so's they don't have to pay staff to do it for you. Then they charge you full fucking price.
Next time you're there, just weigh it all as cheap vegetables. Fillet steak, that'll be 35 pence please.
Also, buy expensive wine along with a bottle of cheap plonk, scan the cheap one and bag expensive ones.
Work out what prepackaged things weigh the same but cost a shit load less. Fray bentos pie, about the same as a tin of value cat food. 2 litres of coke or 2 litres of value mineral water.
Voila! Your weekly shop for the cost of a big bag of veg and a couple of tins of value crap

Edit: anyone would think I've just come round and bum raped your kittens and given them the bad aids from the replies. Do b3tans all own supermarkets and are therefore appalled by the idea of them losing a little bit of their profits?
( monkeyboyalpha jumping on the bandwagon since, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 9:57, 117 replies)

save money...
AND don't give people the impression you're a complete cunt by not having your initials/name on your number plate. It's your car, we get it, you're driving around in it...
( Sallyrsm, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 20:54, 7 replies)

Take longer steps.
Shoes will last longer.
(The Personality Horse www.tinyurl.com/perhor, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 12:55, Reply)

Check Engine Malfunction Indicator Lamp come on in your car?
Take it to a garage and they'll charge you £40-£80 to plug it into their diagnostic tester- or you can buy one yourself for £15-£20 (look for 'ELM327-based') which can turn any PC with a USB or an RS232 serial port (check which you have before ordering) into a 'scan tool'-although for convenience probably better off with a laptop instead of a full-sized desktop. This should tell you exactly what's wrong with your engine and quite often it's something simple like an oxygen sensor which can be swapped simply with a large adjustable spanner- so long as you use anti-seize paste on the thread of the new one.

And then you've got one, you can use it on any of your mate's / families' cars. Works best on cars from 2001 onwards but some earlier cars will work with ISO9001 or KWP2000 or VPW- look up and see if your car is supported, there's plenty of sites on the 'net.
( Rotating Wobbly Hat That's not a banana. THIS is a banana., Thu 10 Nov 2011, 19:41, 5 replies)

Move the garden fence into the neighbours garden by about a millimetre a week. They’ll never notice the change and in only 153 years you’ll have subsumed their property into yours.

Pro tip: You can do this at night at the same time as you’re stealing one of his bees.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 17:51, Reply)

This week
is like watching Martin Lewis have one long, drawn out, and very public mental breakdown.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Mon 14 Nov 2011, 21:20, 3 replies)

Save money on toilet paper by shitting on your windscreen and using the wipers.
( enoughblueskyforsailorstrousers, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 19:52, 3 replies)

don't bother with a tv license
instead just have a video recording of a chicken going around in a microwave ready to stick on should the tv license man come round.
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 12:33, 9 replies)

Well...
Spectacles for a tenner: www.selectspecs.com/ varifocals for £45

Contact Lenses for a fiver an eye: www.daysoftcontactlenses.com/GB/CountryHomepage.aspx

Your entire christmas shopping for under £200: www.tinydeal.com and pretty much anything else you need, but it will take 2-3 weeks to arrive (bear in mind xmas postage times too!)

Never had a problem with the cheap glasses just enter your prescription correctly and wait about 2 weeks, some of the ultra cheapy tenner ones (£6 plus delivery) are not great quality but you just buy more in 6 months time, my £45 slim lense varifocals for close up work and such are fecking lovely, my mate paid £400+ for the same specs, he hates me.

The contact lenses are disposable but I often get 2-3 wears out of them, just treat a pair like normal use lenses, clean after each use, I find even tho I have quite a major astigmatism and these lenses won't correct for it I can manage quite happily in most social situations with these, the ones with LESS water I find more comfortable for long wear, don't be confused by all the comparisons to other brands they only sell 2 types, check them before insertion as they do sometimes have molding defects, but at a fiver for 30, buy more!

Tinydeal is my fave crapvendor, direct from Hong Kong toys, electronics, clothes and housewares, memory cards for £3, Airswimmer Shark for £16, high qual Cycle Gear for £20, Tokyo Flash alike watches for a fiver, Calvin Klein style undies for £4, tiny tiny cameras for a tenner, silly crappy iPhone/iPad/iPod clones, high spec laptops, all in one portable media players, Kindle-a-likes, mini all in one stereo mp3 players that you can take/put anywhere for instant music just add an SD card, cuddly LED cushions that change colour, etc, and on the dark side of the force, electronic key copiers and picks, spyware, chavvy poser death knives and ninja stars, self defense eye gougers, pepper spray, tazers and lasers powerful enough to set fire to your mates retinas, replica guns with laser sights, and even the scary skull masks, army gear and gun holsters you'll be needing for that bank robbery, pretty much you name it they sell it and they don't give a rats crap if a good amount of it is actually highly illegal in your country, they'll still take your money wrap it up and send it, so be more than average wary what you send through customs with your address on it if you don't want a friendly chat with a nice man from the anti terrorism squad!

Oh, and they happily mix in rubber fist dildoes and sexy sally PVC crotchless knickers alongside the kids toys and kitchenware, so be a bit wary when looking through it with your gran for ideas for Christmas.

With electrical goods n kids toys too keep in mind this stuff comes in untested by the usual government filters for safety and such, think of it like stuff you got knock off, back of the lorry direct from the factory off that bloke in the market, check it well before buying (electrical compatibility with your countries specs for example) and before use, or just buy stuff ya can't go wrong with, the site itself has some very odd quirks but I fecking love these people and have delighted/confused many a friend with many a truly hatstand present.

A certain close mate WILL be getting the Steve Jobs commemorative bobble head doll, for example! www.tinydeal.com/preselling-great-steve-jobs-model-toy-decoration-with-apple-stand-for-desktop-display-collection-fci-57009-p-44157.html who wouldn't want that staring at them from their desk all day!?

*edit* currency conversion is top right BTW, do use your profile and the site reviews etc as you get points for participating that do, indeed, make prizes, I get to treat myself in January every year, ORDER THINGS SINGLY you will get them quicker and in better nick that way!
( ..wil, Fri 11 Nov 2011, 8:00, 4 replies)

Teach yourself to ejaculate prematurely
You'll then be able to knock one out to the free preview without having to buy the whole film from Sky.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 10 Nov 2011, 19:44, 1 reply)

Condoms are expensive
but abortions are free
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 16 Nov 2011, 10:18, 3 replies)

Produce your own honey
Steal a bee out of your neighbours hive every night. They’ll not notice the loss of a single bee and in little over 17 years you’ll have a fully operational hive.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Tue 15 Nov 2011, 15:07, 7 replies)