Smoking Nazis
I fucking HATE the smoking police. You know the type, the kind of people who are 'trying to make the world a better place' by pissing you off about your smoking habit.

"Don't you know how bad it is for your health?" Well, yes actually, I do. And I choose to do it anyway. Do I stand over you when you're having a drink, yelling, "Don't you know what that's doing to your liver?" or sneak up behind you while you're starting your car, and scream, "Don't you know what you're doing to the environment?" No, I fucking don't, so what gives you the right to lecture ME about MY health, you cunt?

"But it's antisocial." No it fucking isn't. I have met two (now ex-) girlfriends and numerous one-night stands while outside the pub having a smoke. I've chatted to strangers, told jokes, and have even had a conversation with a random Frenchman about wine (I advised him he should try Buckfast, seeing as he'd never heard of it). Also, I work in a place where most of the workplace smoke, and it's actually antisocial not to smoke, seeing as you're sat in the canteen yourself like a lonely twat.

"It could kill you" Well so could crossing the road, and I'm not going to stop doing that. Many things in life that are enjoyable could kill you. Extreme sports, for one, but I don't see you harrassing sky divers or rock climbers. Prick.

"I used to smoke, and..." What, like that somehow gives you the right to lecture me on my habits? I'll give up when I choose to, just like you did. Now fuck off.

The health education boards adverts are the worst - they seem determined to portray us smokers as evil, baby-killing, disease carriers who will burn down your house if you're not careful. And, before anyone accuses me of being insensitive, I do know someone who died of lung cancer - my Gran, in fact. It wasn't pretty, but I've also known someone who died in a road traffic accident, and I'm not about to stop driving a car.

At the end of the day, I enjoy smoking - it relaxes me, it tastes amazing after your first pint or a big meal, even better after sex. It can be a tool for contemplation, it can be a morning pick-me-up, a piece offering after a big fight, an excuse for a natter, and many more things beside.

So it may smell, and yes, it may even kill you, but nothing's perfect. I'll just come out and say it - I love smoking!

_{This post was paid for by the American Tobacco Association}
(Pavlov's Frog figures no-one really reads sigs anyway, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 2:41, 19 replies)

You're not wrong.
Poland, one of few countries in europe where you can smoke in public places and I went there to bathe in the luxury of beer and fags indoors. One of my Polish friend's mates and his bird spent the entire night moaning at me and his other friends for smoking. We all ended up going outside and slagging them off and ignoring them when we were inside. Facists.

You are right that we shouldn't be forced to quit. I like smoking dammit. I'm not going to stop unless I want to. They say fizzy drinks are dangerous but that won't stop me drinking Irn Bru. Smoking kicks ass. I'll worry about the consequences later.
(chakaflange, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 3:31, closed)

I am
smoking nazi and the fact it pisses you off is the ONLY reason we do it. BWHAHAHAHAH! *snort* chortle.
(lazy killer robot found that beer tastes better when your older, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 4:49, closed)

Click
Agree. I used to hate it when Nick-o-Teen got busted by Superman in those comics, in all.
Cunts.
(sirolimus, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 8:32, closed)

buckfast..
you talking to a french man about wine and you told him to try Buckfast.......you really are a sick man!!!!!

P.S Love the label that says: Buckfast Tonic Wine; "Tonic does not imply health giving properties"
(Studentken is looking for motivation on, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 8:44, closed)

Clicked
I couldn't agree more.
(Big Smurf Brush me daddy-O, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 9:28, closed)

As an ex smoker
I totally agree. Don't quit while you're still enjoying it.

Never really enjoyed a smoke after sex though. I figured reaching for the cigs doesn't flatter your partner much: "That was a great shag, luv - God I need a smoke!"
(lolwhites, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 9:43, closed)

CLICK
Hear hear.
(eesnahk, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 10:17, closed)

YES
YAY FOR SMOKING ...CLICK
( WOLF .™, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 11:50, closed)

Yey!

I'm going to take up smoking again!! Crack that is, less chance of burning a house down!
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:05, closed)

hahaha
drivel.
( scoshi pretending to diet since, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:28, closed)

god, i miss it!
i really don't have much choice, though. i'm waiting for surgery which the nhs will deny me if i smoke. they've actually said to me that you have to have been a non-smoker for at least 6 weeks before surgery, or there'll be no surgery. i may start again afterwards.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 14:00, closed)

You're
The kind of person that makes me want to smoke more

" hahaha drivel.
(I helped save b3ta! scoshi hates everybody, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 12:28, Ignore)"

If it annoyed you, i'd smoke in babies faces
( WOLF .™, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 14:19, closed)

As a lifetime non-smoker...
I have to say that I agree with you, and opposed the smoking-in-pubs ban.
Plus I've been known to spend a large proportion of a night outdoors in the smokers bit just sat chatting- it's so much nicer!

Have a click for the ATA comment.
( uberdeity Wondered why Owen Lars knew of the term "hell" on, Thu 20 Mar 2008, 16:49, closed)

I disagree..
Free will is no excuse for carrying on doing something that's bad for you or for others for that matter. Anarchy would ensue otherwise and while I'm no right-wing stuff shirt, I feel a little push in the right direction is needed now and then to steer us into better habits. I stopped smoking and eat heathly and at the age of 42 have never felt better physically.

Some people enjoy cutting themselves or not eating until they have to be hospitalized but hell it's free will let them get on with it, right.
( girlinthehole, Fri 21 Mar 2008, 19:49, closed)

I agree that no-one has the right to just walk up to you and tell you off for smoking; its your body, and as long as you're not making anyone else breathe it in who doesn't want to, it's your business.

I agree that smoking in pubs should be allowed, so long as proper ventilation is provided to make air quality for the staff behind the bar safe for extended periods (same kind of rules as in factories, etc).

BUT I disagree with your assertion that smoker's aren't antisocial. Well, perhaps modify that slightly; inconsiderate. Fag ends littering the ground, standing around outside the office entrance so I have to walk through their clouds on the way in and out (car fumes aren't easily avoided; their smoke is, if they just had some common courtesy and moved to the side a little).

Though, before the ban, they could have had a smoking room, and all that wouldn't be a problem. So really, the ban is to blame, not the smokers.
(Musuko, Sun 23 Mar 2008, 0:06, closed)

the comparison I use
How'd you like it if I walked over to where you were sitting and did a steaming shite in front of you? Would you care to spend the evening -against your will - in close proximity to a reeking turd that might well contain harmful bacteria. Better if I do the trud in a toilet, eh? Less offensive. Better if you choose to smoke where I can't see or smell it. It's still your choice.
(frankspencer, Tue 25 Mar 2008, 11:20, closed)

Think you've misunderstood me a bit there, Frank
I'm not talking about someone standing next to me who is bothered by my smoke - if someone asked me to move so I wasn't smoking beside them, I would graciously do so.

My beef is with the kind of people, who, when they find out you smoke, perhaps through casual conversation, will then hound you to give it up, spouting health risks and other bullshit that I already know. Basically, I can't stand anyone that feels the need to stamp their beliefs on others.

And in answer to your theoretical, if you did lay a steaming log right in front of me, I would simply be able to walk away, to a part of the pub/world where there isn't a giant turd smelling up the place. I think the metaphor works quite nicely.
(Pavlov's Frog figures no-one really reads sigs anyway, Tue 25 Mar 2008, 21:49, closed)

I have to say
That if pubs provided a designated place that wasn't the doorway of said establishment, everyone would be a lot happier. Somehwere with a bit of shelter, but plenty of ventilation. Oh, and a little bit of warmth would have helped...

I hated standing at the entrance of pubs, puffing away. I didn't smoke in my own house, and didn't much care for the idea of other people breathing in my smoke. My feeling is that if the government had been a bit more forward thinking and allowed licensed premises to have a room designated as a smoking room, with adequate ventilation, there would be much less of the problem. Anyone venturing in there would have been doing so under their own steam.

As for people yanking down their pants and doing a huge steaming turd in front of me... well, I've lost count of the times that someone has dropped their guts at the bar, or on the bus, or train, or in the checkout queue...
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 26 Mar 2008, 22:31, closed)