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This is a question Surprise!

Herb Alpert's Taxi Driver asks: Ever given granny a heart attack on her 90th birthday or knocked down the wall between the living room and kitchen by mistake before the wife gets home? Tell us tales of surprises and their fluffy and/or messy endings.

(, Thu 4 Apr 2013, 12:10)
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Early one morning after getting dressed for work I felt something in my trouser pocket,thinking it was a bit of paper or fluff I stuck my hand in and pulled out .....A BIG FUCK OFF SPIDER STILL ALIVE,oh god,oh jesus I fucking hate spiders they frighten fuck out of me,its making me
cringe just thinking about it
(, Sun 7 Apr 2013, 7:05, 11 replies)
Just.... Fuck.

How fucking awful, I'd have screamed like a little bitch
(, Sun 7 Apr 2013, 12:14, closed)
I woke up one night and found a giant centipede on my neck.
I screamed like a little bitch.
(, Sun 7 Apr 2013, 12:40, closed)
You are a little bitch. Why didn't you just ignore2.0 the centipede you big baby?

(, Sun 7 Apr 2013, 15:55, closed)
Sleepyheaded, I got up one morning and washed my face.
The last little bit of soapy water draining from the sink also carried with it a centipede. WTF!? Where did THAT come from?
(, Mon 8 Apr 2013, 8:43, closed)
Oh fucking jesus

(, Sun 7 Apr 2013, 14:05, closed)
They always get into my sofa
Which makes it difficult to relax on the sofa
(, Sun 7 Apr 2013, 14:05, closed)
a spider?
you massive fanny
(, Sun 7 Apr 2013, 15:25, closed)
Spiders have ceased to terrify me as I have got older.
I still dislike them immensely but wheras when I was younger I would have thrown a shoe at one and run in the opposite direction I will now calmly squash the bastard thing with a tissue and feed the twitching corpse to my pitcher plants.
(, Sun 7 Apr 2013, 15:49, closed)
actual 'fuck that nonsense' here :(

(, Mon 8 Apr 2013, 1:01, closed)
Now I'm scared of pockets.
(, Mon 8 Apr 2013, 14:06, closed)
the horror
sounds just as fun as me putting on shoes to get going to school, to find out something vigorously tickling/scratching my foot from inside. turned out it was one of those tropical cockroaches.

they can be the size(length) of a cigarettes pack, and can also fly, which in turn, is a good enough reason for me to put home on complete lock down during 40+ summer night heat. oh right, and they come out at night :(
(, Tue 9 Apr 2013, 5:07, closed)

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