Love Bite lore.....
A guy i know through my girlfriend whole heartedly believed that hickeys could give you cancer.

Apparently his biology teacher had told him and therefore it must be true....


Huzzah, first post and all that malarky
(Viscous Fridge Magnet Used To Be A Cha-Cha, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 21:52, Reply)

McDonalds:
2-Star Dwayne spunks in the Vanilla Milkshakes.
That explains the 2 stars.
(Dooley, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 21:43, Reply)

Disney
as apeloverage sed bout the word sex appearin in the lion king in a cloud of dust that one is tru

cos me bein rather bored an sad decided to pause it at that part of the film an it is definitely an E not an F.

So i am now curious to kno if ther is anymore hidden things in disney films. i mean come on sum films are pure childish shit so u can't blame ppl for tryin to entertain themselves an others

so ppl at disney i salute u. u truly r the heroes !!
(torture bunny lives under the kitchen sink, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 21:43, Reply)

In praise of large classes
Haven't started any, but I once made an urban legend come true: I was to turn in a paper during class at University - arrived 10 minutes late and she wouldn't accept it. I argued that she hadn't specified *when* during the class, but she wouldn't back down, so I took a seat. At the end of the class, when she was mobbed by students with questions, I walked up and shoved my paper in the middle of the stack. I actually smiled broadly and waved at her as I left.

I believe I got a B+.
(AmosTheSafetyElephant, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 21:28, Reply)

once upon a time
there was a child with down syndrome who's mother took him to the zoo one day. having accompanied him to see most of the animals she allowed him 5minutes of freedom but he had to meet her outside of the monkey cages.
5 minutes passed and the 8 year old didnt return.
another 5 minutes passed but the mother kept calm. after 15minutes the small boy apeared but was soaked through, all of his clothes were wet, it looked like he had taken a bath.
His mother proceeded to demand of him "where have you been?" but the child said nothing, she repeated "where did you go i was so worried?" but again the child said nothing.
The mother, now angry, demanded of her child "if you dont tell me where you were we're gonna go home right now!" but the child remained silent. so the mother dragged him into the car and drove them both home.
Once they got home she told the child to run the bath, so he ran upstairs still soaking wet.
when the mother came up to the bathroom 10minutes later her eyes scanned the room where she saw:
1.her son still in soaking wet clothes
2.his empty soaking wet backpack
3.a penguin in the bath

*already wearing coat*
(antifilth, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 21:08, Reply)

Sorry About This - Me Too!!!
Born and grew up in County Durham. Dentist struck off (or so I've been told - could be an UL) for taking teeth out unnecessarily)

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 20:24, Reply)

Dentists
Thought i'd add to this little discussion.


I've been going to my orthodontist since 1995. That's ELEVEN years. I had a brace from the age of 11 to 13, prior to which I had six teeth removed because my mouth was 'too small'. I was left with large gaps (and dissolvable stitches - lovely) which my orthodontist concealed by tugging all my teeth into shape with aforementioned brace. I consequently have a gap right in the middle of my front two bottom teeth, which thankfully can't be seen as my lip covers it the majority of the time.

I go to my orthodontist every six months. Usually he will look in my mouth for under a minute and tell me to come back in another six months. Every few years he'll take x-rays. I'm due to go back next week where I'm almost certain he's going to organise the removal of my wisdom teeth. He's been threatening it for about three years but just waiting for them to grow through...because, you know, my mouth is too small. Nothing to do with the vast amounts of money the NHS dish out to him every appointment I have...eleven years of appointments...the fate of my mouth COMPLETELY out of my hands and there's nothing I can do about it.
( The Helpful Bear, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 20:12, Reply)

Old people...
Last weekend we had sunday lunch at my house and invited the family over. We were talking about stupid urban myths and my mum was talking about some of the ridiculous things that her mum (who was listening at the time) had told her. Things like; if you swallow chewing gum it'll wind round your heart and kill you, peanuts lie on your chest and all the other classics.

Today my mum was again talking to her (quite senile) mother who was talking about this new diet she was on - a diet where you eat lots of fruit and nuts. She's a bit worried though 'after what we were saying about peanuts the other night'...
(georgia, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 19:38, Reply)

Soapy Norris
County Durham area, North East. I had a feeling when I was posting it that several people might be hurriedly using their tongue to count their own. It seems to be a really weird phenomena, are there any dentists on here that could shed some light? Oh and to freak you out more, there were two types, some had the four out like you, some just the bottom two like me, but everyone I asked was one or the other.

Also, whilst I was typing it I had the bizarre memory of my Grandad coming out with exactly the same thing nearly twenty years ago (he was a total bullshitter thought, check out the Blackpool tower story). Maybe we've uncovered some secret government plot to make us all have weird gaps in our teeth.

EDIT: Also, just in case everyone thinks I'm a retard, for everyone I've talked to, the gaps are still tooth sized, nothing has crowded the space as predicted.
( Gleeballs is mostly made out of chocolate and hate., Mon 9 Jan 2006, 19:31, Reply)

Little brothers...
I once told my little brother that you could get someone pregnant by french kissing them. I'll never forget the look of absolute terror on his face, he ran upstairs to 'make a call'.
(georgia, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 19:24, Reply)

Gleeballs' dentist story - true, not myth
Gleeballs - out of curiosity, whereabouts was that dentist? Cos I had four teeth out, two at the top and two at the bottom- for the same quoted reason i.e. my mouth was too small. Needless to say I still have the gaps...
(Ali Bongo 9000 Ali Bongo 9000, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 19:00, Reply)

THE DAVINCI CODE
I believed every word of it...honest
(tree hugger putting the "semen" in "basement"..., Mon 9 Jan 2006, 18:18, Reply)

Rabbit rabbit rabbit rabbit
I heard that a woman once had a dog and their neighbour's little girl had a rabbit in a hutch outside. One afternoon the woman let her dog out and after a while it came back with next door's rabbit in it's mouth. The poor little bugger was dead and had obviously had a rough time with the dog because it was a bit messy. Anyway, the woman who owned the dog was mortified that her canine chum had killed the rabbit so she took the mangled little thing and cleaned it up as best she could. She crept into her neighbour's garden and put the dead rabbit back in the hutch, laying it down in such a way that it would look like it had died peacefully, and not in the jaws of a hound. The woman then returned to her own home, pleased with herself for being so sensitive towards the feelings of the little girl, who would obviously be upset enough at finding that her beloved bunny had just passed away.

However, later that day her self-satisfaction was shattered by a piercing scream from her neighbour's garden. She ran out to find the little girl standing in front of the hutch, absolutely distraught. "What's wrong?" asked the woman in mock ignorance.
"It's my bunny," sobbed the girl.
"Oh, no!" said the woman sympathetically. "Has it gone to bunny heaven?"
"Yes," answered the girl. "He died this morning and Daddy buried him in the field, but somehow he's come back!"

A bloke told me he'd read it in the paper and that it was true, but as much as I want to believe it, I don't think it is.
(stusut79, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 17:27, Reply)

Un Legend Urbaine en classe d'O-level Francais
Quote: French people believe that people who can pronounce "th" the English way are gay.

Thanks, Dad, for making me look a wooden tit in front of my French teacher.
( Amish Information Systems hates misplaced, commas, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 17:27, Reply)

Jack Daniels....

Bourbon legend


*salutes*


.
(Xyphious : Sinkin' Gin since '85, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 17:16, Reply)

Hah! I'm not gullible
After moving from the UK to Canada in 1997 I heard a vicious rumour that Lady Di got killed in a car crash.
C'mon, even I'm not stupid enough to believe THAT!
(Peelmytangerines, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 17:05, Reply)

"If your hand is bigger than your face, you've got AIDS"
On hearing this urban legend, rather than checking myself for the virus in this manner in front of the crowd of bigger boys and receiving a punch in the face, I went home and checked in the bathroom mirror. My hand obscured my face... Oh no, I must have AIDS!

Cue me, by now one very frightened little boy, trying to fall asleep with a smile on my face so when my mum found me dead in the morning she wouldn't be too upset!
(gavD, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 17:04, Reply)

Pick up a penguin
My sis was serving pints in the pub and talking to a punter. When she asked him what he did he told her that he picks up penguins at London Zoo. He told her that when the planes land at the London airports, the penguins look up, tip over backwards and can't get up again.
She actually believed him.
(Peelmytangerines, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 16:44, Reply)

little brothers can be fun
When my brother was 13 ( oh he was a special child ), both of our cats had had two sets of litters each and we decided it was time for the spade. When my brother asked what spading was, it just seemed too tempting...
Me "ok, you lay the cat down, and gently rest his body in a vice. The vet then holds the cat still using the vice and pulls out a sterilised spade from his cabinet, and whacks the kitten with the spade"
Him "noooo, that can't be true"
So I go get my stepdad from the other room and he indeed confirms this is true. He also adds what they do with the testicles of the male cats
Him "ewwwwwwwwwww"

He didn't eat baked beans for over 2 years.

I wish this kinda thing would have stopped, but the most recent quoted mad comment was the
question "Do frogs swim?"

yeah, but now I'm fat, and he works in a health food shop... I think he won eventually
(mmmm curry doesn't really understand this sig lark, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 16:36, Reply)

Lion King part two
I am sure you are all aware that the opening line (to the first song) in the film 'The Lion King' is 'Arsene Wenger'.

If you dont believe me check it out.
(DrTugnut, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 16:32, Reply)

wax on cock off
re the one about Ralph Macchio
he is still the baby faced pussy we knew and hated
and has a film coming out this year!! his (first for 3 years)
what freaks me out the most is that he was 23 in the karate "kid"
www.imdb.com/name/nm0001494/
(Barry Chuckle has gone out in the thong to feed the pigeons, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 16:28, Reply)

Everybody must get stoned...
'Hey man, if you press play for 'Dark Side of the Moon' and switch on the video when the lion roars at the start of the 'Wizard of Oz' you get some really freaky coincidences.'

Similarly, if you have caned enough mushrooms you will notice some other really far out sychronicity if you listen to the washing machine whilst watching Antiques Roadshow.
(DrTugnut, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 16:27, Reply)

Fucksocks!
*off topic warning!*

I really regret mentioning 'The Game' now.
I know Piston_broke & satchmoR mentioned it first on page 1 but i think my post may have reinforced it!



Fellow B3tans i can only appologise for the ensuing annoyance!


Oh and if anyone cares heres what Wiki says about it:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Game_%28game%29


Oh and lankynyack, i got it from some bastards forum sig about 3 years ago!



On a total side note I must thank people here for the phrase 'fucksocks' and 'twunt' as they are part of my daily vocab now :-)

oh and by the way, you just lost
*carry on*
(Xyphious : Sinkin' Gin since '85, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 16:25, Reply)

We started this.
Bryan Adams has a wooden leg.

You never see him walking in videos
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Mon 9 Jan 2006, 16:10, Reply)

Pee Pool
I beleived for *years* that you could get stuff to go into swimming pools so the water is dyed purple if someone pees....

www.snopes.com/science/poolpiss.htm

D'oh!
(Wallilay has been bored of this shit since, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 16:05, Reply)

Lion King
QUOTE: does anyone remember when the Lion King came out, and there was a furore about hidden rudeness? there was supposed to be rude words in dust clouds and the like... was this true, or is it just a really good lie??


The word 'sex' supposedly appeared in a dust cloud. The general explanation is that there is a word, but it's 'sfx', short for 'special effects'.

www.snopes.com/disney/films/lionking.htm
(apeloverage committed the vile act of onanism on, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 15:42, Reply)

Quincy
The actor who played Quincy has for many years been confined to a mental institution, as he believes he really is Quincy. I'm guessing he spends much of his time there trying to convince his psychiatrist that it was MURDER, not suicide.
(nempsey, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 15:33, Reply)

Reverse urban legend
My boyfriend is for some reason convinced that the whole thing with different regions on DVDs is just an urban legend. No matter what I say he remains certain. Not even putting Region 1 discs in his Region 2 DVD and showing him the message can change his mind. Apperently that is a common message when there's a problem with the disc...He's also convinced some of his friends of this and they in turn are telling others...
( bakelit72 something really clever, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 15:32, Reply)

Paddy Fields...
A tedious train journey between coventry and birmingham me and my ex were taking a look out of the window.
She asked perfectly innocently why the fields of the west midlands countryside were flooded. I quickly invented a story about birmingham farmers not making enough money from livestock grazing and converted to growing rice in paddy fields which had to be flooded.
And she belived me, Problem was 5 minuites later i couldnt stop laughing and she figured out why eventually... Doh!
(iydlibm ...If I Am Online Here, I Am Definatly Bored..., Mon 9 Jan 2006, 14:42, Reply)

a couple of nuggets
true fact number 01

when tolstoy was writing 'war and peace' he had originally titled it 'war, what is it good for' but his wife the interfeering nagging bint forced him to change it to that which we now know. The real title remaining lost in history until re penned by bruce (the spruce) springsteen back in the eighties in that rockin number we all know and love.

stanley laurel is clint eastwoods old fella... look at their pics beside each other.. I implore you.
(The Cats Twat, Mon 9 Jan 2006, 14:22, Reply)