Live on your own in a small and battered tent for a month
Through everything the British weather can throw at you with no running water, electricity, internet, TV or radio, while trying to stop the seagulls eating your cheese and worrying that one day you won't be quite fast enough on the half-mile uphill trek to the nearest bog. Then see if you really, really care what order you eat your chips in.
( MatJ LOOK, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 17:47, 16 replies)

'Trying to stop the seagulls eating your cheese'
is now my favourite euphemism for furious masturbation.
(FartThroughAWalkieTalkie wished you were dead in ditch on, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 17:51, closed)

Arf!

( Slippery Mick ‏, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 18:03, closed)

I wish it was
I have rarely felt less sexy that at 4.30am in a dressing gown and boxer shorts, chasing a seagull around my tent (in the rain) in order to reclaim my sliced cheddar.
( MatJ LOOK, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 18:18, closed)

and 'Chasing a seagull around a tent in order to reclaim my cheddar'
deserves to be a euthemism for something deeply deprived too.
(FartThroughAWalkieTalkie wished you were dead in ditch on, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 19:21, closed)

Depraved, surely?

( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Thu 22 Dec 2011, 8:38, closed)

It might just be me
but that's the sexiest thing I've ever heard
( Major Turd for tonight only, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 23:43, closed)

Now I know what sort of batter the tent was covered in.

(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Thu 22 Dec 2011, 1:42, closed)

Messy divorce?

( Muns, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 18:07, closed)

Don't be silly
MatJ has a face like a string of hirsute sausages, he's not been married.
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Wed 21 Dec 2011, 18:11, closed)

I love that description
I'm also 21.
( MatJ LOOK, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 18:16, closed)

Working in Cornwall last summer
The tent may have been small, but it was quiet, incredibly cheap, and the campsite had washing and laundry facilities just around the corner.
( MatJ LOOK, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 18:19, closed)

I had fun working this summer
The staff campsite was in the middle of the donington park racing circuit. Which also happens to be just over a mile away from the end of the fucking runway at East Midlands Airport! Four days, no cocking sleep.
( Muns, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 18:33, closed)

Did you lose your job while renting?

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 19:35, closed)

Weekend hippy
Were you in one of these "Occupy" camps getting in everyone's way and messing up the grass? Don't look to me for sympathy. On another note I too spent most of last summer on a campsite in Cornwall whilst working, but in a nice motorhome with central heating, toilet, TV etc. Lovely.

Length, about 6.3 metres with the motorbike mounted on the back of it, cheeky!
(Classic Ray, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 22:18, closed)

The worst bits were the cold and the wind
It got down to 4^oC one night. I was lying there in a thin sleeping bag with all my clothes piled on top, trying not to more at all. The wind was probably worse though - I woke up one morning with the wall of the tent brushing my nose.
( MatJ LOOK, Wed 21 Dec 2011, 23:49, closed)

sofa surf for 6 weeks over christmas,
and see how much fun being 'proper' homeless is.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Thu 22 Dec 2011, 6:49, closed)