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What's a good pistol to buy?
I don't mean a little, goofy one, I mean something you can absolutely kill shit with.

I'm considering a Walther P99 9mm semi-auto, since Germans are fucking nuts about killing stuff!
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Fri 26 Sep 2008, 6:56, archived)
:(

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 6:56, archived)
are you on his hit list?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 6:57, archived)
It'd have to have a very good range

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 6:59, archived)
I could dodge you.
Probably.
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:02, archived)
dodge me?
as in avoid hitting me, avoid being hit by me or something else?
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:04, archived)
I could probably avoid being hit by you
at least once.

Maybe twice?
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:08, archived)
Do y'all wanna land u all up in court again boy?
Do y'all remember not what the judge said after the incident with Mrs Diefenbaker's pig?
(LOOK AT ME I'M A COMEDY ACCOUNT EAST 17 TUESDAY WHOOP WHOOP, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:13, archived)

www.b3ta.cr3ation.co.uk/data/jpg/yoke.jpg
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:16, archived)
I suspect so too

(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:15, archived)
That's the way to do it, lore him into a false sence of security, then BAAM, one chop to the back of the neck and he'll be shitting his own balls off.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:18, archived)
BUY A DICTIONARY

(I helped save b3ta! Hankster, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:21, archived)

Dictionary Spellchecker.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:30, archived)
I think he's calin' you out for a [10 paces count down thinggy]..
My money is gonna be on you though, I saw the way you handled those ruffians outside the ASDA, I wouldn't want to be on the wrong end of you, down a dark ally, on a mystey night, outside the 'ardest local.

By-the-way, how did that interview with Russ Kemp go? I heard he pissed himself when you showed him Big Birther*.


* I ment that as the name, burther or something like that, but spelt it that way and thought it more appropriate.... I was implying that's the name of your gun.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:10, archived)
I'm a mama bear, I need no gun
I have perfected 'the look' - it's been known to make grown men cry.
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:18, archived)
Cry and swoon at the same time.

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:20, archived)
and spluff like mr frosty.

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:24, archived)
Wasn't Mr Frosty the thing that everyone really, really wanted
but then found disappointing?
(It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday!It's my b3taday! Fluzzy namby-pamby pudding and pie, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:26, archived)
oh yeah, I meant to put mr whippy.

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:28, archived)
What's Max Mosely got to do with this?

(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:32, archived)
Yes and No....
... I never found it disapointing because I NEVER GOT ONE =((((

I had to make do with cordial-in-a-mould-in-a-freezer.

I'm making that up now, this year I'm going to buy an ICECREAM MAKER !

I refuse to buy a deep-fat fryer, I know I'll over-use that expermenting with stuff like battered deep fried scotch eggs.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:35, archived)
"The Germans are fucking nuts about killing stuff".
Yes.
(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:11, archived)
You're thinking about buying a gun?
You must have a MASSIVE penis.
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:11, archived)
Oh don't encourage him, Wicca.
He'll only post a photograph of it again.
(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:13, archived)
i have a gun and my penis was removed due to sex offences in iran

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:14, archived)
:(

(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:15, archived)
you can still show me your bumhole

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:16, archived)
Wicca darling baby fabulous lovely !
I heard a rumour on Louis Vuitton is going to base the Spring '09 collection on his penis.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:15, archived)
I am considering buying a large pistol.
And yes, I have a large-ish penis.

What did you discover?
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:17, archived)
You mean that all men who buy weapons aren't horrific sexual inadequates desperately trying to compensate for crippling sexual and social failures?
I mean, why would a 40 year y old man living with his parents conducting his sexual relations via MSN feel inadequate in any way?
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:19, archived)
By the way....
I managed to sync my iPhone with the on-board computer with my Porsh* 911, that I sooped up with neon lights under it. Hopefully when it get's back from the shops, I'll have the limited edition Visarchi safety belt with dimond-encrusted locking-catch.

Ohhh, look at that, my mini bank statement has fallen out of my wallet, I do hope nobody else picks it up, it would be awfully embarassing if they know I had over £290 in there !



* Pronounced 'Porsh-a'
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:26, archived)
I wrote something harmful here.

(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:30, archived)
Good for you.
Cheaper than buying a gun for any lingering doubts about your sexual potency eh?
(I helped save b3ta! Wicca'd Witch needs ideas for a new sig on..., Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:33, archived)
whatever.

(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:38, archived)
The SA80 or the P90....
Perfect for most conditions, esspecialy Facility on Goldeneye.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:13, archived)
Pistol, not rifle!
Fuck!
(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:22, archived)
One with a backwards pointing barrel.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:16, archived)
yeah, one that shoots the bullets 360

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:17, archived)
360 is where you're aiming.

(I helped save b3ta! Syncubus Yarr! Ye'll be walking Planck's Constant! [GMT-5], Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:32, archived)
A water pistol.
Actually, I don't think you could be trusted with one of those.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:16, archived)
Yeehaw,
we're-a-goin' squirrel drenchin'!
(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:19, archived)
WHOOP! HELLS YEAH!
*Glub*
Damnit! it went off in my face again.
(I helped save b3ta! stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:20, archived)
Them squirrels is mighty ornery!

(I helped save b3ta! FoldsFive, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:21, archived)
Christ, you're a sad fucking twat

(I helped save b3ta! Hankster, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:21, archived)
Is it american school kid hunting season again?

(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:23, archived)
Due to Britain's notoriously lax gun laws this is definitely the place to ask.

(I helped save b3ta! Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:23, archived)
I have a widowmaker blahdeblahdeblah
bought down the pub off a bloke who had it in his van.

I AM NOT MENTAL!1!1111!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:26, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/5479813
(I helped save b3ta! Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 26 Sep 2008, 7:27, archived)