Good news London based B3tans!
I'll be in Koko tomorrow evening. Come and see me, I'm fantastic!
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:29, archived)

What about the several thousand b3tans that aren't London based?
What are we to do, fucknose?
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:30, archived)

I'll come and visit you all at some point!
so...DON'T PANIC!

unless you live in Stoke, I'm not going to Stoke again.
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:31, archived)

how about the rest of us
you selfish cunt!
( jenpots, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:30, archived)

Aslong as you're not in Stoke,
there's a chance I'll visit your town/city/dwelling.
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:32, archived)

Come to Rossendale.
Tomorrow.
( Major Turd for tonight only, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:34, archived)

Rossendale doesn't appear to be all that far from Halifax.
I'm planning to go to Halifax later on this year, to see football at the shay. SO, there's a very real possibility I could stop at Rossendale. LUCKY YOU!
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:37, archived)

Oh yes!
It's not all that far.
( Major Turd for tonight only, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:39, archived)

Candlelit meal? Soft music? Italian food?
You're so lucky!
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:43, archived)

And dessert?

( Major Turd for tonight only, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:54, archived)

Rigorous anal sex.
...
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:58, archived)

I was suggesting Tiramisu
But OK.
( Major Turd for tonight only, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:59, archived)

...and Tirmasu is a euphemism for?

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Sat 16 May 2009, 0:01, archived)

I'm not sure, but it sounds Japanese.
In which case I daren't think.
( Major Turd for tonight only, Sat 16 May 2009, 0:02, archived)

Unless you're driving, the connections between the two are poor.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:39, archived)

do the connections between stations improve
if The Doveston is driving? how does that work?
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:48, archived)

Well if he's driving, he won't have to worry about connections at all.
And besides, unless you're talking about buses, there aren't any stations in Rossendale.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:50, archived)

well obviously if he's driving, he won't have to worry about the connections,
but surely the connections are the same regardless of whether or not he is driving?
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:52, archived)

Yeah, well I like eggy cup.
So there.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:53, archived)

try not to talk like an idiot in the future.

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:54, archived)

I apologise for any offence caused.

( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:57, archived)

Shut up.

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 16 May 2009, 0:00, archived)

Why are you so grumpy?
I only want to be your friend :(
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Sat 16 May 2009, 0:01, archived)

:( :( :( :( :( :(

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 16 May 2009, 0:11, archived)

you've lost me there, sorry, no offence
great
( mongychops, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:31, archived)

Shan't

( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:31, archived)

Pity I'm not on london.
Oh well.
( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:31, archived)

Oh The Doveston! I would love to come and see you in Koko tomorrow evening,
however I have plans. Firstly I will be rummaging through my flatmate's underwear drawer (he is going away this weekend) and then masturbating into the best pants I can find.
Then I will be hiding no less than three seperate poos, of my own making, in various places in his room, possibly using cellotape.
Then I will be taking a nap, and maybe having a cup of tea.
As you can see, The Doveston, my day is pretty full already, but thank you for the invitation!
( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:32, archived)

I've already shit in your bed.
That's not a dark ale you're drinking either.
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:34, archived)

the security guard recommended this ale.

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:36, archived)

It was a ploy to encourage you to buy a planted bottle of Theakstons.
Premeditated etc etc...poo beer
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:39, archived)

nut brown

( Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:42, archived)

nut
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:44, archived)

i always struggle to make plans, it appears you don't, no offence
good greatness
( mongychops, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:35, archived)

i just though up a joke, what do you do if your wife is bleeding from 2 holes? shoot her again
no offence

great
( mongychops, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:44, archived)

*applauds*

( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:45, archived)

Golly gosh!
:O
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:45, archived)

Good news Bristol-based b3tans!
I'll be in the ASS library tomorrow evening!
( LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Fri 15 May 2009, 23:33, archived)

+taking it in up
library
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:36, archived)

I know you leave these for strikethrough.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:37, archived)

Well I'm such an incorrigible slag.

( LimeyTreat Bitch. Lover. Child. Mother. Sinner. Saint., Fri 15 May 2009, 23:43, archived)

Well exactly.
Terrible business.
( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:56, archived)

Good news Northampton based B3tans!
I'm going to be doing a shit in a minute.
( WHARRGARBL, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:35, archived)

going to be doing a
in a minute
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:36, archived)

Are you?

( WHARRGARBL, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:39, archived)

Youn are.

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:42, archived)

Stick it on twitter.

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:38, archived)

Or start your own toilet based updates.
Named...


*drumroll*

SHITTER
( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:38, archived)

I'm not in London this weekend.
How would you, The Doveston, suggest I go about fixing this problem?
( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 15 May 2009, 23:42, archived)

I'll take lots of pictures and make them into a powerpoint presentation
of how the evening went. It'll be as if you were there with me!
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:47, archived)

I'll set an evening aside next week
so I can enjoy this wonderful gift to its fullest!
( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Fri 15 May 2009, 23:49, archived)

I often find it difficult to express in words how little I care about what people say here
I might go for a shit now
( Gilgamesh gazed in wonder as Frampton came alive, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:45, archived)

Shit your feelings out, Frank

( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:48, archived)

Feelings mutual...
nah, I'm kidding, you're a gem, don't change.
( The Doveston haunted by the memory of his own amnesia, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:48, archived)

You do them purty werds reel eezy franks

( Wildheart Baby. Drunken Mess In A Good Way, Fri 15 May 2009, 23:57, archived)