This year
I am growing onions and garlic and beans. I am also growing a beard and have been for the last five months.

What's the longest you've grown something for?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:53, archived)

ym
She's still eating the pies I'm mailing her.
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:54, archived)

You don't strike me as the feeder type
Unless it's out of spite.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:55, archived)

Yeah,
Pure spite.
She can't leave the house now.
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:55, archived)

I think you're confusing my mum
with JMG.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:56, archived)

Dont you go doing the same thing
that man is FAR too busy to lactate into your gaping maw.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:01, archived)

Fatty fatty two-by-four
Can't fit through the bedroom door
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:57, archived)

I've grown my self over the last 21 years, 5 months and 5 days.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 18 May 2009, 13:54, archived)

a year and a half growing white poppies across the road from the police station
although I don't think that I could have made opium out of them, even if I'd wanted to.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:54, archived)

I'm growing tomatoes, various salady things, coriander, chillis and parsley at the moment.
It's all going swimmingly at the moment.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:55, archived)

Obvious answer but probably my barnet.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:55, archived)

I sowed some seed that took 9 months to come to fruit (as it were)
Though, technically, I didn't do the growing.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:55, archived)

You had a wank in the bath, just before your victim got in,
didn't you?
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 18 May 2009, 13:56, archived)

yes.
It's the only way I'll get anyone pregnant.
( Maffers I flow kinda strange like Spina Bifida footprints, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:01, archived)

You said it, not me.

( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 18 May 2009, 14:02, archived)

grow plough
( RR I love you ... in a way, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:05, archived)

I planted a bunch of trees when I was about 12
they're still there.
(PsychoChomp, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:56, archived)

Was that six months ago
or are you a bit older than that?
(Bazongaloid, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:57, archived)

I'm 26 on the 24th of May

(PsychoChomp, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:57, archived)

I really am quite surprised
that so many people on here are younger than me.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:59, archived)

How old are you?

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:59, archived)

He's 52.
Poor old Al.
( Cawl, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:02, archived)

I'm growing my hair
So that I can shave the line of the mohawk back in, after the daft bint at the barbers took a chunk out the side.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:56, archived)

When I was twelve I threw some violet seeds in my yard. They've grown every year without me doing anything at all to them.
Also, I've been growing my current head of hair for 17 months.
( Lisette von Falcon, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:56, archived)

i planted a japanese maple tree the year my daughter was born, i used to breed discus fish, i've probably mentioned all this before, sorry, no offence
great
( mongychops, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:56, archived)

Your faux politeness is terribly offensive.

( thealternativefact, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:04, archived)

I have been growing a beard for the last 3 years
Although it has a trim every week or two.

Woo for beardy b3tards!
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:57, archived)

If you trim it
it doesn't really count, that's only a two week beard.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:58, archived)

I suppose.
I did go a month without trimming it but my boss said I looked like a homeless man who had stolen someone's suit. She had a fair point.
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:01, archived)

DREAD IT.
Then you can dress up as an octopus.
( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:02, archived)

That would be too good for words
Maybe I could enter the World Freestyle Beard Championships.

I'm not making that event up, it exists.
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:04, archived)

Oh, we know. Well, I do.

( Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:05, archived)

i'll never come to terms with this b3tards thing, it will always seem wrong to me, although i assume some like it, no offence
great
( mongychops, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:59, archived)

No offence taken, or not.
Do you prefer b3tan possibly, or not?
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:03, archived)

i do yes prefer the term b3tan, it was what we once were, i understand the site owners point of view in trying to avoid that term but it smacks of taking stuff about a forum a little srrs, or not, no offence
ok
( mongychops, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:04, archived)

the trouble with b3tard
is it's pronounced the same as /b/tard. the confusion!
( spacefish bong!, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:12, archived)

I've been growing my body
for the last 25 years.
( WormuIus, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:57, archived)

I'm impressed that you elected
to grow your body, but not your penis.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:58, archived)

My waistline
Has been steadily growing for the last six months.
( Anthropos Was making beer on, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:59, archived)

body repetoir of gay chat up lines
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:59, archived)

Looking for a tip ;)

( WormuIus, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:05, archived)

I've been growing my body for

the last 25 years. 12 years and then it stopped.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:04, archived)

I've been nurturing my misanthropy
for three decades.
( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:59, archived)

Oh, and give my love to Jerry and Margot when you see them

( wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:04, archived)

I'm growing my hair
I want to know how long it will get before it pisses me off and I chop it off when I'm drunk.
( TopUpTheTea you ain't seen me, right?, Mon 18 May 2009, 13:59, archived)

You'll come home one day
and your hair won't have cooked you dinner and you'll have had a couple of pints in the pub and you won't mean to hit it, but it still ends up at the bottom of the stairs.
(Bazongaloid, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:04, archived)

It's a sobering moment

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:05, archived)

the apple tree in my garden
i planted that when i moved here, seven or eight years ago

i'm growing beans too. i wonder if it's too late to plant onions...
( spacefish bong!, Mon 18 May 2009, 14:04, archived)