So
I hear the post of Somewhat Annoying Cross-Board Lolcock is open and I was wondering:

* what're the qualifications
* to whom do I apply?
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:33, archived)

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)

I've nearly finished my cup of tea.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)

ROCK AND MOTHERFUCKING ROLL

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:36, archived)

£5 coin fail
"The Royal Mint is issuing a limited edition £5 coin to mark 500 years since Henry VIII ascended to the throne.
A few of the "coins fit for a king" are cast in platinum, with a hefty price tag of £4,400. For ordinary subjects, there are cupro-nickel ones for £9.99."

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/uk/8089561.stm
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:42, archived)

*goes to buy £4,400 worth of platinum with a five pound note*

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:43, archived)

Sometimes a letter comes through offering a special edition £5 coin at face value,
I'm often tempted to order one just so I can see if I can spend it in the pub.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:45, archived)

Also, I've now finished my cup of tea.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:46, archived)

i don't see why, he wasn't a very good king

( ArthurTheRat, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 18:00, archived)

I've only had two of those today.
This is terrible teaing.
( Master Of Turnips. Only gays and morons believe in ghosts., Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:53, archived)

that was my first of the day,
and possibly my last.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:54, archived)

You have to wear a scarf indoors
and remind people ALL THE TIME that you went to Oxford or Cambridge.
( SuperMatt, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)

I went to Oxford last week
Cambridge not so much.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)

Scarves?
Doesn't Cockhound Sebastian Winnett/Wormulus wear them?
(King Baby Duck more than a ceiling, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:35, archived)

I've been punting on the Cam,
with my dog.

My dog went to Cambridge.
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:36, archived)

I've been dogging in a van
with your mum.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:36, archived)

General investigation or pissing up lamp-posts?

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:37, archived)

Yes we take our dog to the other end of the country to piss up lamp posts.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:37, archived)

Variety is the spice of life and all that

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:38, archived)

I just had a burger!
Haha!

With onions!
( The Gentleman Bastard waxing lyrical. ©, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)

Have another two or three
It's the Internet after all.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:35, archived)

i'm going to have 4 burgers in buns tonight, or not, no offence

( mongychops, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:38, archived)

I'm going to make a chicken curry
And I might be fat enough to have egg fried rice.
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:35, archived)

ri fa
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:36, archived)

Hpw the fuck does that work, then?

( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:37, archived)

You tell me
I'm not a fucking scientist.
( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:38, archived)

FUCKING HELL
DIE MOTHERFUCKER DIE!
( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:34, archived)

Hurrah

( Goatworrier had your mum and she was shit, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:35, archived)

*kicks fax machine*

( St. Defenestration The REAL one, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:37, archived)

My MP3 player will still not sync properly. The End.

( executiverocker only wears C&A, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:35, archived)

I don't know what that means.
but on a lighter note, I just ordered a new pair of boardshorts, and cheap they were too. Checked my confirmation email and realised they're cheap because they're children sized.

Bollocks.
( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:36, archived)

PAEDOSHOPPING

( Dave Trouser ; the people's choice - 75% agree, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:37, archived)

Someone inform Jenk!

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:39, archived)

It's the aged 6-8 Spongebob underpants I ordered with it that makes it look even worse...

( Harold Bishop's Love Child some sort of terrifying sex magician., Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:40, archived)

hahaha, you nobend

( mongychops, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:37, archived)

you'll grow into them.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:38, archived)

Why did I read that as chicken sized?

( broadsword, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:41, archived)

Take communion of our lord glued eel
print off his profile page in colour, and eat it
( moohalaa, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:36, archived)

If you were serious about the role, you'd have waltzed in and taken it without asking.
And carried on long after you were made redundant.
( The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:38, archived)

I guess my polite demeanour automatically rules me out
Shame.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:39, archived)

Gaz me your best impression of a peacock and I'llsee if you've got the skills or not.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:38, archived)

This is life, touch my cock

( broadsword, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:38, archived)

/talk's answer to the Cheeky Girls right there

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:40, archived)

By posting something childish like that?

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:40, archived)

your mum
twice
( VampireMonkeyOnSpeed a super sexy sexual sex terrorist sex, Mon 8 Jun 2009, 17:51, archived)