Fuck that shit
I just found out bus tickets can be edited by using a pencil eraser.

I'm totally getting a free bus today.

What little triumphs have/will/what/cock/shit YOU achieved today?
(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:19, archived)

Fuck all, dole office is closed.
I went up to get the Irish Times for my Granny, my mother had already been up to get it.
( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:21, archived)

What will JMG do today? :O

(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:21, archived)

I just don't know!

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:23, archived)

What a mirror into the magical world of the Irish, our backwards neighbours.

( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:22, archived)

Her gran has got two papers and she's probably got cataracts so can't even see them
zainy Irish.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:24, archived)

Tarmac your drive for a penny mister?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:24, archived)

We can do better than this Mykey
let's go to that place we never go to.

All out offensive, non-jokey anti-Irish racism.
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:25, archived)

They have darker skin than English people
this makes them poorer and stupider than us.
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:26, archived)

Come on Mykey
I know you can do it.
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:27, archived)

All food in Ireland is made out of Potatos and sectarian violence.

( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:27, archived)

All energy requirements in Ireland are met by peat burning powerstations, fuelled by armies of emaciated ponies.

( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:29, archived)

The average Irish person has 1.5 ears.

( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:30, archived)

haha I'm trying to do work you cunt :D

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:32, archived)

Unlike Ireland

( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:36, archived)

Says your man posting here all hours of the day when he's supposed to be working.

( Esme Weatherwax I swear on my tash it's daycent hash, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:38, archived)

He has a man?

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:39, archived)

I am working.
Right now I am working. I am fulfilling many of my duties simply by sitting here. The fact that I can answer both my phones, check all three of my emails all from this desk is a bonus.
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:39, archived)

i thought you were banned from b3ta at work...?

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:42, archived)

It was a self-imposed ban.
The problem is, when I'm here on my own, like today. I can't really leave the desk for any length of time in case people need access to the building.

You'll notice today is the only day I've really posted anything this week. Things will get busier in the next half hour and I'll disapear again.
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:46, archived)

are you a receptionist?

( mongychops, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:48, archived)

Haha, good one

(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 11:04, archived)

are you a security guard?

(ricky_darkholer is blonde on the inside, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 12:11, archived)

The Irish, while thought of as cheerful and quaint by most of the world
Are in fact bitter and twisted religious extremists with a chip on their shoulders that we nicked a part of their 'country' and improved it..
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:30, archived)

Oh Mykey :(
You fat, fat, bitter racist.
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:31, archived)

Dont forget fat

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:32, archived)

I am mocking you
www.b3ta.com/talk/6286231

LOOK!
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:36, archived)

Thats it, im setting Cr3 on you!

( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:38, archived)

isn't that entrapment, internetlawyerman?

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:37, archived)

I suggest you Gaz him.

( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:38, archived)

Sounds just like Scotland

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:33, archived)

Yes, it does
See also: Wales and Argentina (Although possibly less of the religious thing)
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:36, archived)

It has been scientifically proven that the IRA are better at wars than the Taleban.

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:33, archived)

i saw it too!
it was a close run thing though

down to one man each
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:34, archived)

And the Tale-man blew himself up?
That's hardly a victory for the IRA if you ask me.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:39, archived)

wasn't it a bomb planted by an irish?
i only saw the edit on YHBW so i can't say for sure
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:40, archived)

Oh, I thought it was a failed attempt by the Tale-man.
At least that would fit in with the American way of making TV programmes. I've just re-watched it and you're right. Now I'm watching Pirate vs Knight.
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:42, archived)

have you actually got the series then?
i'd very much like to watch it!
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:49, archived)

The fights are on youtube.
As are hundreds of comments like 'no way that gun would never do that knights kick ass'
(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:50, archived)

I realise of course that you aren't posting this from Ireland
Paddy O'Potato is using the one (horse-powered) computer.
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:24, archived)

A friend of mine at school used to scan in his weekly busticket
edit it on his PC and print it out.

It was indistinguisable from the real thing.
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:21, archived)

thats more work than actually paying for it

(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:31, archived)

www.b3ta.com/talk/6286160
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:35, archived)

Go on.
Give me your answer.
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:37, archived)

I really want your unique take on why my flounce has upset you to the point that your other account claims to have me on ignore
and you won't reply to my gazzes.
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:38, archived)

far be it from me to bring sense into an internet debate
but I think there are plenty of perfectly good reasons why he could be ignoring you, old chap.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:40, archived)

What did I do?

( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:43, archived)

Nothing, particularly
You know full well your style of posting isn't to everyone's taste, even if it is amusing. Mostly ;)

But the ignore button is there for that. people can use it for whatever reason they choose, they don't need to justify it to you

OMG, sensible posting, ONLINE
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:52, archived)

I don't have to pay for bues or tube travel, saving me thousands each year.

My arms feel quite spinny today too which is cool.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:21, archived)

You can be a helicopter

(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:21, archived)

I wonder if mongychops will reply to me today

(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:22, archived)

of course i will mate, i've got your back, no worries

( mongychops, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:23, archived)

I'm not entirely sure what you're doing today
But I'll let you get on with it. Any attention is good attention.

That's my latin phrase.
(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:24, archived)

that's not latin
you dorkus malorkus
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:26, archived)

I was translating
And, ooh, obscure Simpsons reference
(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:29, archived)

i know, i'm so cool

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:33, archived)

i think he is there if you need a shoulder to cry on

(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:32, archived)

With my face, I'd feel more comforted crying on the Statue of Liberty's shoulder

(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:41, archived)

i would like to agree
but i´m afraid cr3 is monitoring the board and make take this as a form of bullying. and i don´t want to get stepped, then have to log out and change account, as i´m too lazy.
(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:46, archived)

yeah, to save trouble
when you do something twatty and ban-worthy, you should have both accounts banned
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:54, archived)

er... what?
have i done something recently? please do tell. oh wait, you don´t know anything, so please stfu.
(richard cropper's comedy account Stephen Frizzle is on the sex offenders list, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:58, archived)

How did you manage that?

( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:22, archived)

I point and wink at the barriers and they just open
Same goes for bus drivers.
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:25, archived)

truth: My dad is a tube driver so I get a staff nominee pass.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:27, archived)

Fuck you and your Dad.

( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:31, archived)

You wish, I'd make my testicle jets take off from your runway chin

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:38, archived)

a tube driver so I get a staff nominee pass Bert from Mary Poppins
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:32, archived)

You can teleport?
Could you teach me?
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:23, archived)

SURE THING EDD!
You think *thinks*, wink *winks at some kids*, and double-blink *blinks lots* AND DEN YOO JUMP IN DOO DEE PAINTIN'! AAHHHH FUCK IT DIDN'T FUCKIN WORK! MARY POPPINS YOU SCHLLLAAAAAAAAAAAGG!!!
( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:28, archived)

This needs to be animated so that when he winks at the kids, some Daily Mail readers beat him up

(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:30, archived)

Or he breaks his ankles

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:32, archived)

GET ON IT, EDDACHE

(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:39, archived)

YES MAYBE PERHAPS!
Validate me
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:42, archived)

cripes
i didn't even see this before i made the comment about your dad earlier

IT MUST BE TROO
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:34, archived)

He's my hero :)

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:37, archived)

is that because you mc hammer slide your way to work?

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:23, archived)

I really wish I could hammer slide. fuck it, i'm going to practice.

( Donkey Gums @mattcomedy, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:30, archived)

never give up

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:36, archived)

never let you down

( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:40, archived)

someone i know used to forge national express tickets

( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:21, archived)

a free bus for you? that is good news, i hope this goes towards helping you through what i can only assume must be a testing time
today will be a good day
( mongychops, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:22, archived)

i opened all three boxes of new pencils in the stationary cupboard and snapped the leads off

( rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:23, archived)

YOU FIEND

(__, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:26, archived)

fucking hell
i no longer feel safe knowing that you're loose on the streets
( manolith hooray for me, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:27, archived)

Work pays for coaches to take us to work and home
Saves £1000's
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:25, archived)

a u
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:32, archived)

This is the best strikethrough I will ever do
and nobody will see it :(
( WormuIus, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:33, archived)

I saw it
I'm not sure what you're trying to do.
Couches?
( SuperMatt, Thu 9 Jul 2009, 10:44, archived)