Get the anger out of your system
Upon whom will you unleash your fury today?
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 6:49, archived)

My landlady!
Who is a fuckwit of the highest order and has for four days refused to answer my calls regarding some plumbing work that needs to be done.
(In fairness, the water supply is running out and the well needs drilled about 10mtrs deeper to reach the current optimum water table supply depth and it's going to cost her a fucking fortune)
( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 6:55, archived)

ROOOAAAAAAAARRRRRGGHH!
Anyone probably. I'm at absolute fever pitch of excitement and nerves. Don't cross me, yeah?
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:19, archived)

Am I to assume tonight there will be a very drunk and cheery TFD?

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:38, archived)

I'm not sure.
I might just cry into a solitary gin. I bet it's going to be one hell of an anti-climax.

How are you lovely?
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:43, archived)

I had that the day I finished my degree. Few beers at home and I was so knackered I went to bed early
I'm grand, the sky is blue and optimism is in the air. Today I design a logo for The Renal Institute of Birmingham. Wheeeee.

Why cry into gin when you can be all YAY GIN?
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:52, archived)

A big fat yellow man pissing on the bullring.
You're welcome.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:57, archived)

Cor, cheers

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:06, archived)

a kidney stamped with a map of birmingham city centre and a big question mark

( sleepybinky, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:59, archived)

That's pretty out there, Binkly

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:11, archived)

Definitely leaving that typo

( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:12, archived)

hmm maybe the question mark is too much.
do they have a special institue hat you can dress the kidney in?
( sleepybinky, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:52, archived)

Anyone who tries to jump the subway queue.
Usually three or four people.
( Zuowan, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:22, archived)

you queue?
For the tube?

Like... in a line?
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:22, archived)

He's probably the only one in Beijing who does!

( fagilliD Fuck I'm good!, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:28, archived)

Yeah, there's this great thing where everyone has to get off one packed train, up some stairs, through a labyrinth of fences and down some stairs to another platform.
It takes two or three trains before you can get to the front of the queue, and there are fences to attempt to keep people in line, but some cunts always just walk to the front and squeeze into the gap between fence and train.
( Zuowan, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:26, archived)

Just push them in front of the train.
Unless it's the one with the weird glass barrier thing that the train has to line up perfectly with. That confused me the first time.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:41, archived)

They only run up when the train arrives, so I can only push them into the train, not under it,
but it's a nice though.
( Zuowan, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:44, archived)

Nobody. I'm in quite a good mood
Then again I haven't woken up or encountered the general populace yet...
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:38, archived)

*bangs pans*
*dances around your room*
*jumps up and down on you bed*
( TFD is sporting this season's finest necropants, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:44, archived)

You're a furry dinosaur. I could never be cross at you.
I'm more concerned about having to brave Kidderminster town center, it's where proles go to die
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:53, archived)

Things I know about Kidderminster
* I used to go to the big swimming pool there when I was a kid.
* It has lots of roundabouts and discount carpet warehouses.
* The MP is (or was) some single issue independent who managed to stay in office despite completely failing to do anything about his cause.
( Zuowan, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:58, archived)

Yeah, we got rid of him
The town finally decided that while having a hospital is very important, there are many other things that are far more important.
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:06, archived)

Also
that's a lot of kidderminster knowledge. You poor bastard. The swimming pool is quite good though
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:07, archived)

Is it still there?
They had good water slides and chips in a paper cone.
( Zuowan, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:29, archived)

Yep
They've got a "big arena" there now. Every year - Roy Chubby Brown.

Did you grow up around here then?
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:40, archived)

Sort of. In a village near Bromyard, went to high school in Worcester.
Not local by normal urban people's standards.
( Zuowan, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:46, archived)

Not the grammar?
My brother went there. Endless tales of hilarity
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:05, archived)

No, a shit high school, we didn't associate with the poshos.

( Zuowan, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:09, archived)

You missed out
Public school humour etc
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:13, archived)

ehhh load of army boys and toffs
they still humour about willies and poo
( sleepybinky, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:25, archived)

another thing about Kidderminster
it has absolutely no good graffiti, anywhere...

and my mate manages a candle factory there, a candle factory!
(Ross McBingobangobongo bingobangobongo, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 13:11, archived)

the internet i expect
it usually asks for it, the slut
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:44, archived)

Dude. The only person you need to get angry with is the Tyler Durden prick who creeps out of your psyche every time you turn on your computer.
Put down the mouse and fuck off outside until you're mentally healthy again.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:51, archived)

Why has he picked up the mouse anyway?

( Zuowan, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 7:59, archived)

tyler is probably just about to throw it at the internet, or something

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:01, archived)

see, now there's really no need for that dr sham
assuming i have a mouse. tsk.
(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:00, archived)

every user of the m25

( mongychops, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:14, archived)

including yourself?
Or you just specifically hate them despite having no impact on you.?
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:21, archived)

I'm sure they probably do have an impact
since he'll be amongst them in traffic, or bad driving.
( SugarSpunSister Yeah, whatever, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:30, archived)

yeah but
unless he's part of the solution he's PART OF THE PROBLEM!!
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:59, archived)

There are one or two debtors I need to kick in* today
*kick in = send whiny letters asking to pay us
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:40, archived)

I'm delivering four back to back training sessions this morning
then two more this afternoon.

By the end of the day I'm going to be bored as fuck listening to myself drone on
( CowJam, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 8:54, archived)

is it online?
sounds fascinating?

Correct personal effects locker usage 101?
( RocketSurgeon is pretending he's still young, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:00, archived)

I am training people in the use of an online system

( CowJam, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:05, archived)

Probably my brother.
He's being a fucking prick. I blame the retard he married.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:00, archived)

all brothers are pricks, end of
oh...except me. Hmm...I need to re-think this.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:04, archived)

I have two brothers.
They both have their prickish qualities. The alcoholic one is actually behaving at the moment.
( Blue Star was working part time at the 5 and Dime, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:07, archived)

No one today...today is for peace and serenity.

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:04, archived)

Ghey

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:06, archived)

If I get angry while working one more time I fear someone may be killed

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:07, archived)

Do it
Do it do it do it do it do it
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:25, archived)

My two cats who denied me my pre-commute cup of tea by leaving me the bloodied remains of a pied wagtail to clean up
making me late for work
( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:04, archived)

What? But I...
oh...two CATS.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:06, archived)

Cool.
I just get starlings.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:17, archived)

A crow once crash landed head first in our back garden
That was not pleasant to wake up to.
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:20, archived)

I once ate a chicken

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:35, archived)

FoooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooOOOOOOoooooooOd

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:44, archived)

a whole chicken? DOUBLE HARD YOU!

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:53, archived)

I like it when pigeons fly into windows and leave the greasy mark on the window of their splayed out wings and startled face because they crashed into a window.
That happens in this office occasionally. I have never seen the pigeon crash into a window. I have only seen the greasy mark left on the window by the pigeon that crashed into the window.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:00, archived)

well this was a full-on dead fucking crow in my garden
it was horrible
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:05, archived)

I like crows.
I might do the eye spy book of birds again but try to spot dead ones.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:21, archived)

It was a gift, you insensitive bastard.

( Zuowan, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:37, archived)

I'd rather a full English breakfast and a paper

( h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:42, archived)

STOMP STOMP STOMP STOMP
STOMP

bleugrhghrhgh
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:14, archived)

I'M TIRED.

( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:19, archived)

Have a nap
your boss won't mind
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:24, archived)

He's not here. He'd never know.
Good idea.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:57, archived)

Anyone who makes today more difficult than it needs to be.
Moving day, innit.
( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:42, archived)

I'm not angry. I'm absolutely knackered from Disneyland though.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:43, archived)

I met a girl who lives and works near HBLC so it was all worth it.

( JessAction Give me all your expensive brandy and hubcaps., Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:49, archived)

Was it good?
We are going to go during half term in october or november whenever I don't know. Fuck off.
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:03, archived)

turns out i've got to go to the hospital today, sadtimes

( mongychops, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:54, archived)

Oh god, did MW find you?

( BraynDedd Natasha Kaplinsky's labia majora, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 9:55, archived)

I'd like to see that on CSI
"The victim's face appears to be have been flattened and his cheek skin contains flakes of white paint and plaster."
( Zuowan, Thu 9 Jun 2011, 10:03, archived)