Yes yes y'all, a-to the beat y'all
Hi guy's, I'm an 'old school rapper'.

Haha, not really, it was me (Queef Richard's) all along! I'm not an 'old school rapper' at all! Fuck me I am bored as shit.
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 11:30, archived)

alright boyce you wanker, those turquoise pumas are arriving today lol

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 Jul 2021, 11:39, archived)

they were my 'most wanted' for fucking years
Until I got some of course
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 11:43, archived)

those mustard yellow ones are alright as well

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 Jul 2021, 11:47, archived)

nah, not for me

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 11:48, archived)

I only ever wear those motorcycle boots with the straps and the ring on the side 'cause I'm a unique individual who doesn't follow the rules. Take that society!
(Ooooh_cuntroversials_sockpuppet Make O/T great again., Thu 1 Jul 2021, 15:01, archived)

alright Windy Pig, haven't seen you on here for a few days

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 Jul 2021, 15:07, archived)

Soz, don't know who that is. I'm just so tired from carving my own path you know?
(Ooooh_cuntroversials_sockpuppet Make O/T great again., Thu 1 Jul 2021, 15:56, archived)

school rapp +wank
(inflation vore mpreg yaoi yuri bara, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 11:44, archived)

I'm wanking all day and I'm wanking all night
I'm wanking to the beat and I wank it up tight
( broadsword, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 11:54, archived)

it's a fair cop guv

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 12:45, archived)

alright m8, I'm joining you in the 'bored as shit' club today
also those couple of shandies last night were a mistake
( Turing's Artificial Hand Sig Sauer, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 11:59, archived)

I'm just trying to get through the next few months one day at a time
keyword: shandies
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 12:46, archived)

+hand

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 13:03, archived)

standard

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 13:55, archived)

you want to get yourself a proper job

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 12:08, archived)

I fear you might be right m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 12:45, archived)

*hops hip*

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 12:27, archived)

and you don't stip

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 12:46, archived)

I can do a really solid head spin
But I choose not to
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 13:29, archived)

^ spinny bumskull

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 13:58, archived)

*slowly rotates*

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:38, archived)

I am procrastinating
As I need to clean the house but I don't want to
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 12:29, archived)

dozer will pay you to do it

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 12:47, archived)

Try procrasturbating instead. Much more rewarding.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 1 Jul 2021, 17:15, archived)

Just had an order from a hospital for "Glycopyrronium *UP G* 2% solution".
We make glycopyrronium bromide solution, but I have absolutely no idea what "*UP G*" means in this context. My best guess is that they want someone to phone them up and say "what's *UP G*?"
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 12:42, archived)

I fucking hope so
That would be fantastic
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 12:48, archived)

I believe it's a type of updog.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 1 Jul 2021, 18:09, archived)

Mick Harris interview, worth a read
thequietus.com/articles/30140-mick-harris-interview-scorn-napalm-death
(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 Jul 2021, 13:32, archived)

having just read it, I disagree

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 13:46, archived)

WELL GO FUCK YOURSELF THEN

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 Jul 2021, 13:47, archived)

it does go on a bit, admittedly

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 Jul 2021, 13:48, archived)

to spare anyone else the bother
'I released a record under the name Knob on a Belgian label run by Gunther Spunkbreath, he was great to work with. Then I made one under the name Wank with David Turd, then I did another one as Knob. Then I thought, oh, I want to do another Wank record so I recorded one for the German Tedium label. Then I thought to myself I want another Knob. Then I didn't record anything for a bit. Then I made a record as Guff-tits in Amsterdam...'

Only 15 times longer.
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 13:50, archived)

Sounds good

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 14:36, archived)

mate you're no idea, it's riveting

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 15:08, archived)

he had a massive rant on facebook a few weeks ago, apparently very upset about Lee Dorrian's shop

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 15:16, archived)

why, it looks amazing

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:29, archived)

sour grapes, I don't think they are good friends

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:58, archived)

I most certainly did not

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:37, archived)

well tangles says you did and I for one believe him
it's exactly the sort of thing you'd do. Why can't you just be happy for other people for once? Jesus.
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:42, archived)

Look, if I get the chance to ruin someone's day, I'm going to take it, right?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:51, archived)

Well you're really only ruining your own, when all's said and done.
Think on *that*, if you will.
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:55, archived)

I'm petitioning for him to be banned from all social media

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:59, archived)

*starts gaz petition*

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 Jul 2021, 17:03, archived)

just not in the spirit of /ot

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 17:16, archived)

*signs*

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 17:37, archived)

lol deaf

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 18:01, archived)

What?

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 18:20, archived)

What happened after guff-tits? This is the best thing I’ve read in ages.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 15:17, archived)

You wouldn't believe me if I told you, m8

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:31, archived)

The credibility of the fake PayPal email I got today was somewhat undermined by the fact that the subject read “Papal Service”

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 14:23, archived)

haha, I had an email from a 'JILLBI DEN' earlier

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 14:30, archived)

George Soros wants to give me six million dollars, and he spelled his name correctly so it must be legit.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 15:03, archived)

Yeah I like calling the new guy Jobby Den

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 15:18, archived)

haha, I'll bet you do!!
mind if I nick that for my social media 'presence'? I'm a major 'influencer' with loads of 'followers' so you'd get great 'exposure'.
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:39, archived)

Can I get a free sample?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 23:27, archived)

THE POPE

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:11, archived)

I’m in Warrington
I am going to look at shoes in Millets. It’s the done thing in the north. Had some of this famous “cheap northern beer” yesterday fucking hell it was rank.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 15:30, archived)

was it from a Sam Smith's pub?

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:40, archived)

a
+es
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:56, archived)

brown piss with hints of brackish pondwater and whippet turds?
I think I've had that one
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 1 Jul 2021, 16:41, archived)