good afternoon, scoper's
I had a great night out last night, on my own. It's the future, I swear down.
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:04, archived)

I had a great night in with the present Mrs Horrible
This may be the future. Or it may not.

Alt: bollocks
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:06, archived)

bollocks

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:08, archived)

You would say that

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:46, archived)

Did she let you put your winky in her foofoo?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:05, archived)

Isn't that a bit gay?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:46, archived)

IT DEFINITELY IS (‿!‿) ⑊(´ཀ` ⑊)

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:55, archived)

Thanks for the new tits

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Wed 25 Jun 2025, 20:25, archived)

get rid of your first ( it's redundant
yw
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 20:42, archived)

NEVER
send me moar tits NOW
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Wed 25 Jun 2025, 20:49, archived)

I went to two different pubs to meet two different mates at two different times.
It was like two different futures. Both of them were nice.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:09, archived)

Sliding Bores

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:10, archived)

I SAID TWO DIFFERENT TIMES IT WASN'T SOME STUPID FILM WITH GWYNETH "SPAZZY FLANGE" PALTROW WHERE IT HAPPENS AT THE SAME TIME

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:22, archived)

It was tho

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:35, archived)

I'm pretty sure she filmed those bits at different times, she even had different hair as a handy visual shorthand.
Aardvark is just worried that this is the timeline in which he dies early.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:47, archived)

I’m more worried that this is the timeline where I start selling candles scented like my vagina.

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:58, archived)

The stupid bitch didn't even have the wit to call them 'cuntles'.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:59, archived)

Fandles

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:02, archived)

Tallowpian tubes

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:51, archived)

gashlight

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:54, archived)

winner

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:54, archived)

go on then

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:56, archived)

Hairy wax wound

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:56, archived)

fucking hell

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:57, archived)

Wicked

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 14:00, archived)

Wick Me Out

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 14:19, archived)

Snuff Muff

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 14:24, archived)

pot poussi

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 14:29, archived)

Candhole

( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 14:34, archived)

Cerwix

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 14:38, archived)

^ b3ta.com/talk/8450970
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 14:39, archived)

I did massive drugs, in my armpits, in my main veins and not pure codein to munch on. All free

( mongychops, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:12, archived)

How's recovery going

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:22, archived)

Back to the start on left wrist, had surgery yesterday, right one 2 weeks hopefully

( mongychops, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:42, archived)

which bits did you break?

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 17:28, archived)

his wrists ffs
can't you fucking read?
(inflation vore mpreg yaoi yuri bara, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 17:59, archived)

fuck off Quincy

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 18:50, archived)

NHS delivers

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:28, archived)

Lovely people yesterday

( mongychops, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:43, archived)

I pissed on a pygmy.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:14, archived)

Start small and work up

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:29, archived)

I did karaoke at a nightclub last night
and my throat is sore now
(inflation vore mpreg yaoi yuri bara, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:47, archived)

-karao +bukka

( MiseryCunt you cannot be sirious, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:55, archived)

what's he like?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:55, archived)

kara Phil
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 12:59, archived)

Should have stayed away from the glory hole then

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:03, archived)

*oral sex joke*

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:36, archived)

You can't tell jokes orally on here, this is a text-based forum.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:49, archived)

Speaking aloud? Stop!

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:54, archived)

+ mash the keyboard with your head dobber instead.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:56, archived)

Awful bullying of mongychops

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 25 Jun 2025, 16:57, archived)

Seems like the most opportune time to do it, really

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 17:49, archived)

True.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 25 Jun 2025, 20:24, archived)

Something something screaming bender

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 14:03, archived)

I read this to the tune of Tiny Dancer

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 14:35, archived)

Arf

( broadsword, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 17:35, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8450961
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:37, archived)

I spent the night trying not to shit and vomit myself inside out
It was far from nice.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:03, archived)

Did you succeed?

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:36, archived)

Just about

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 13:43, archived)

skibidi toilet tho

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 15:22, archived)

Standard.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 25 Jun 2025, 16:57, archived)

Erm, I think they prefer to be called 'spasticated' m8
Not very PC
( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 18:03, archived)

360 no scope

( $$ ✅, Wed 25 Jun 2025, 18:05, archived)