afternoon gooch huffers
It’s cold and I’ve had to put a jumper on.
What have you put on? You can’t say ‘the Ritz’
( Cheers Cheers, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 12:12, Reply)

Airs and graces.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 21 Sep 2026, 12:32, Reply)

🎩

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 12:34, Reply)

pubic h+
gr fae
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 13:27, Reply)

My poor wife

(The Porcupine From Purgatory Ningles, mateyplops! How are the kids? *smoosh*, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 13:03, Reply)

alright Les Dawson

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 13:35, Reply)

My dad hired a caravan for a holiday when I was very young.
I remember thinking at the time that the man running the place was that man off the telly, i.e. Les Dawson. I suppose he must have looked a bit like him. It wasn't until years later that I worked out it was probably someone else.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Ningles, mateyplops! How are the kids? *smoosh*, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 14:37, Reply)

Also, I was sure that the woman who sang "It's my party and I'll cry if I want to" was my primary 1 teacher.
Didn't think to question it until years later.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Ningles, mateyplops! How are the kids? *smoosh*, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 15:00, Reply)

Could of been leading a double life.

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 17:30, Reply)

Could've

(morning cheesy arse grease innit, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 17:39, Reply)

Thanks
always get that wrong.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 17:54, Reply)

Think of it this way: imagine it's you, and it's true.
He could have been leading a double life
I could have [could've] been leading a double life
I have been leading a double life

Conversely:
He could of been leading a double life
I could of been leading a double life
I of been leading a double life
(The Porcupine From Purgatory Ningles, mateyplops! How are the kids? *smoosh*, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 19:25, Reply)

cooda

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Tue 22 Sep 2026, 0:50, Reply)

You're wearing her as a hat?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 18:26, Reply)

'it'
you know, like Big L
www.youtube.com/watch?v=WWMjRMJ0dTI
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 13:29, Reply)

Word

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 13:36, Reply)

My pants.
Not someone else's pants. Mine. I checked.
( Aardvark and so at last, I understood, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 13:51, Reply)

Did they have your name sewn in?

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 14:01, Reply)

I bet they're not checked.
I bet they're red with polka dots.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 21 Sep 2026, 15:24, Reply)

PODKA

(morning cheesy arse grease innit, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 17:47, Reply)

Podka Coke, no less.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Mon 21 Sep 2026, 18:42, Reply)

About 3 inches to my head

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 13:51, Reply)

Oops

( Cheers Cheers, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 14:02, Reply)

How many inches head were you giving before the increase?

( mongychops, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 15:26, Reply)

Not many
Strong gag reflex and sharp teeth
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 23:43, Reply)

a record

( $$ ✅, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 15:31, Reply)

a hoodie.
Leaving work as soon as my laptop shuts down.
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 15:46, Reply)

A condom. As they say in the Boy Scouts, 'be prepared'

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 16:25, Reply)

Are we...are we the baddies?

(morning cheesy arse grease innit, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 16:33, Reply)

Thinking of rearranging the deck chairs, on the Titanic

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 16:33, Reply)

exciting.
Will the band provide a little rearranging music?
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 16:51, Reply)

The hits of N*Sink.

(morning cheesy arse grease innit, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 16:57, Reply)

Ok didnt mean to set that up
but I like a good pun
( willenium Fist bump for verification, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 17:10, Reply)

It was a fucking awful pun, Will

(morning cheesy arse grease innit, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 17:40, Reply)

Yeah.

( willenium Fist bump for verification, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 17:54, Reply)

+ Vanilla Ice

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Mon 21 Sep 2026, 19:30, Reply)