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# jobs
I wish I wasn't self employed, and that I worked either in a call centre, or in IT. I'd spend a bloody lot more time on this site, and trawling porn, if some fuckwit was paying me to do it. Heyho, time is money, (you lucky sods!)
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:17, archived)
# oops.
I think I shat myself.
(THIRTY-TWO - Sputnik -, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:18, archived)
#
b3ta.com/talk/
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:18, archived)
# Why the fuck would we want him?
(I helped save b3ta! DijonWolfie profile 1 of 1, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:32, archived)
# PFFT
(I helped save b3ta! ClanSoul, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 12:21, archived)
# nah we only take reasonably intelligent people in the cliques over there
(I helped save b3ta! GrandmaOfShoes, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 12:31, archived)
# thanks for that
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:18, archived)
# angry bee, don't be mad
it's the internets so just feel glad
(I helped save b3ta! McBadger COW, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:31, archived)
# ...
(Brownpants From Liverpool to Manila, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:19, archived)
# I think you really
really

need a pony
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:21, archived)
#
pony good hard buggering
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:22, archived)
# from a pony
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:23, archived)
#
pony blue whale
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:24, archived)
#
blue whale the great sperm whale
(Brownpants From Liverpool to Manila, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:26, archived)
# nah
blue whales have todgers the size of double decker buses... sperm whales must be more like an smaller than average 4x4.
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:27, archived)
# still you wouldn't like a 4x4 up your arse
squirting 4 gallons of jizz
(Brownpants From Liverpool to Manila, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:30, archived)
# point
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:31, archived)
# You'd
rather a double decker bus then?
(teh shongage Wonders how the real world renders so fast, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 17:23, archived)
# with it's really great sperm
in some kind of oceanic bukkake tsunami
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:27, archived)
# I 'm glad you are self employed
if it means you waste threads less
(I helped save b3ta! HappyToast Groat froth, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:26, archived)
# i dunno that this thread is a complete waste
we all seem to be venting a good bit a vitriol that would be otherwise damaging elsewhere
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:28, archived)
# indeed
I was going to write a letter to the council about lamposts, but instead, I'm going to post on this thread and gaze longingly at illuminated street furniture
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:29, archived)
# i think i'll pea my peacock anim
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:30, archived)
# and I think I'll just stand here and wave
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:32, archived)
# oh my
(I helped save b3ta! McBadger COW, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:37, archived)
# it means I'm happy
:)
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:39, archived)
# This
disturbs me
(THIRTY-TWO - Sputnik -, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:37, archived)
# oh, I'm sure I can find something more disturbing
:)
edit:

:D
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:40, archived)
# I think the first one
is more disturbing to me.

He's looking at me.
(THIRTY-TWO - Sputnik -, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:42, archived)
# oh


he's watching you too
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:46, archived)
# This one
is just cute though.

I want one.
(THIRTY-TWO - Sputnik -, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:47, archived)
# what about this?
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:50, archived)
# No.
I don't want one of those.
(THIRTY-TWO - Sputnik -, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:56, archived)
# now he's seen you
your tasty brain juices are next on his agenda

:)
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 12:06, archived)
# *hides*
(THIRTY-TWO - Sputnik -, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 12:10, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! Dixipoos Bye Bye Blackbird, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:57, archived)
# hahahaha
:D
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 12:06, archived)
# This still hurts my eyes.
:(
(THIRTY-TWO - Sputnik -, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:37, archived)
# well, to be fair, that'll be your monitor as much as my picture
(I helped save b3ta! mutster101 fell over, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 12:46, archived)
# maybe he/she is just posting on here to tell us how shit we are
:)
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:28, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! McBadger COW, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:29, archived)
# <img src="http://www.b3tards.com/u/3baec04fb1b0be6e2d31/fail_l_plates.gif" />
Place this code in the bottom of your post using the edit button.

Congratulations!

Wear it with pride!

:)
(I helped save b3ta! XLVII .uk, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:35, archived)
# hahaha!!
'wishes for L-plates so I may per-use this'
(I helped save b3ta! McBadger COW, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:36, archived)
# If you can get anyone to use them
I'll love you forever!

/uphill struggle
(I helped save b3ta! XLVII .uk, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:45, archived)
# I made a poo
it smelt of you
(I helped save b3ta! pzyko Query failed., Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:40, archived)
# Wow, what a fascinating insight
please, tell us more
(I helped save b3ta! FredAstaireAteMyTapShoes but he left me this fetching ballgown, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:50, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:51, archived)
# GET THE FLAKE UP.
(THIRTY-TWO - Sputnik -, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 11:57, archived)
# GET THE FLAPS UP
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 12:44, archived)
# SHAKE THE FILE UP
(I helped save b3ta! gfreeman is only here for the beer, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 15:05, archived)
# SHIT FUCK CUM
(chippy time travel agents, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 16:12, archived)
# SHIT THE FILE UP
(I helped save b3ta! 10,000 Shitting Monkeys are breaking into your house right now!!!!!!!!!!!!, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 17:19, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! riverghost servicing your mum since, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 12:01, archived)
# ...
(I helped save b3ta! ClanSoul, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 12:20, archived)
# Get a job, you lazy bum!
(I helped save b3ta! mediocre ha ha ha, you're reading this, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 12:45, archived)
# The door opened a crack
and I could see Victor peering through at me. He thought I wouldn't have noticed him, but there he was, strong and magnificent, his shell newly varnished and his antennae gleaming.

I put the vase down and rushed to the door, my heart leaping more with each step closer to him. My love, my beloved, my One True Snail: He had come back to me!

We said nothing. He led me to the bedroom, and for the second time in my life I knew what it was like to be loved by a snail.

I awoke the next morning to find a note on the floor near my bed. It was written in a trail of shiny slime. It said, 'Don't hate me'.

Trevor had gone again. This time for good.
(Fuiru Sting, where is thy death?, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 13:38, archived)
# omg
that is the sad'st thing Ive' have ever reads.
(I helped save b3ta! Jamnog Sardines in her eyebrows, lobsters up and down, Sat 29 Sep 2007, 16:17, archived)