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Cheating maybe

but here's me in my crab outfit.

As you can see, I am at home in my lair, surrounded by my horde of fanatical followers.

(

crab_bloke), Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:31, archived)

hoorah!

return of the crab.

(

AndyK, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:48, archived)

Woo!

Is that your castle? It's brill!

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:07, archived)

yes, it's my fort

and terribly well defended it is too.

(

crab_bloke), Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:07, archived)

I can see

Has it got dungeons? I love dungeons.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:12, archived)

of course

and it's got cowboys and indians and germans and tommies and GIs and all sorts. Hooray!

(

crab_bloke), Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:24, archived)

AndyK - do you put these easter eggs in Ask Jeeves?

website easter eggs

(

rob, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:21, archived)

I wish they were mine

I think most of them originated over in the US. I left a few in before I went but I think some kind soul deleted them...

(

AndyK, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:48, archived)

Bling Bling Woop

Pinball Wizard

Pinball Cheat

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:15, archived)

very nice

it was the size of a puppy or a small kitten, or if you can beleive it, it was squirrel sized

(Giblet, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:34, archived)

Today, I am mostly making chicken stock

but need suggestions as to what to turn it into. Help!
The person who comes up with something scrummy can come to tea with me and Nicey.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:38, archived)

you could use it to flavour rice

but I wouldn't really know. I'm vegetarian.

(

rob, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:41, archived)

I'm a fruitarian

http://www.fruitarian.com/

(

hal9000 sme, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:43, archived)

I can't believe that fruitarianism can be healthy

Vegetarianism - maybe, but I wouldn't do it.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:51, archived)

i once heard that...

if you ate nothin but plain paper your body would become used to it and you would survive (much like living on nothing but rice) although i think id miss weetabix and marmite on toast ! (oh yeah im a fruitairan arent i - not)

(

hal9000 sme, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:57, archived)

I'm not sure about that

I heard, I think from that old SAS geezer that they wheel out from time to time, that you can only survive a number of weeks on cat food, I can't believe you can survive longer on paper.

(

PeterSeychelles, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:08, archived)

I thought cat food

was quite nutricious.. Good job I wasn't trying to live on it.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:15, archived)

So did I

but you've gotta believe Lefty (I think that's his name).

(

PeterSeychelles, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:20, archived)

i think it was from the same person that

told me his buddy had just had a baby (not himself :) and he was going to talk to it in only klingon, so it was the kids native tongue ! sounds a bit iffy to me - still i might have been wildly drunk at the time and imagined the whole thing

(

hal9000 sme, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:17, archived)

Hmm

rissotto type thing. I like that. And I have everything to make it without going to tescoes!

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:43, archived)

or as the base for a japanese clear soup?

no pastry needed - and you can pop in random veg & bits of pasta.

(

rob, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:47, archived)

Yep,

That could be a possibility.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:52, archived)

if you hunt down a

small squirrel, not the kind that leap and devour peoples heads as they are dangerous, and add this to the broth it is quite nice apparently.

(Giblet, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:28, archived)

add mushrooms and bits of leftover chicken to it

and it would be a lovely risotto. Or make some onion gravy and get some sausages.

(

AndyK, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:47, archived)

Yes

I think that is to be the plan. So it's you and Rob for tea I think. Can you be here for 6.30pm?

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:11, archived)

damn

that means it's cheese on toast for me again tonight.

(

PeterSeychelles, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:24, archived)

okay then

you can have robs share as he's a veggie.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:31, archived)

I'll bring a bottle

and a crab.

(

AndyK, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:27, archived)

You're bringing Joel?

Cool.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:33, archived)

Make a nice pie.

Maybe chicken and leek. That would be yummy.

(

PeterSeychelles, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:43, archived)

Pub style pie

would be nice... But on the down side it would involve pastry making.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:46, archived)

You could always cheat

and get ready to roll pastry. Here I've even got you a recipe for chicken shaped chicken pie.

(

PeterSeychelles, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:53, archived)

It is

quite tempting to try that.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:02, archived)

I'd make a soup myself

probably with potatoes and leeks, maybe barley, maybe carrots, onions obviously. Does that sound nice?

(

crab_bloke), Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:33, archived)

It does sound nice,

but I think I'm vering towards the rissotto plan. With the chicken and mushrooms and maybe some peppers. Hmmm.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:10, archived)

that would be nice too

sorry- I get a bit blinkered in my soup frenzies.

(

crab_bloke), Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:27, archived)

Turtle and his backing dancers

As the party heated up, turtle was joined by his backing dancers

(

Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:24, archived)

Is that crab

pinching her nipples?

Filthy crab.

(james, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:28, archived)

Lady magnet crab

maybe, just maybe, he's giving her a quick tweak, but she seems to like it.

(

Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:57, archived)

Only 7 people to go

before we get our 500th registered user!

We should award them something... maybe they could take a trolley and wizz around b3ta collecting as many stupid images as they can in 60 seconds.

(

chthonic, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:05, archived)

and only 59 to go until we have 3000 on the mailing list

woo.

(

rob, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:07, archived)

oh no

another baby in head-eating peril

somebody save it

(

automatton52 Grumpy old goth, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:03, archived)

poor mite

(

AndyK, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:13, archived)

The downward spiral of a baby addict

(pissycocks GIRAFFETASTIC!, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:14, archived)

simply

superb

(

spacefish bong!, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:17, archived)

yes, i second that

absolute genius. maybe it could make a nice animated gif?

(

crab_bloke), Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:45, archived)

hehe

watch this space.....

(pissycocks GIRAFFETASTIC!, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:30, archived)

blimey guv

that's disturbing. wicked.

(

AndyK, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:49, archived)

you never save them do you?

In the face of repeated cries for help, baby after baby has succumbed to your evil photoshoppery...

(

automatton52 Grumpy old goth, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:34, archived)

has anyone seen the BBCi trailer

with the hand people? Does it remind you of Monkeon:

(

AndyK, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:31, archived)

Absolutely

I naturally just assumed they had ripped off you/us. We are going to see a lot more of this, type of plagiarism, mark my words.

Our only reward will be that we are a shining light of creativity in a sea of mediocrity.

Hoorah for us.

(

nicey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:41, archived)

well... a lot of b3ta stuff is cut & paste of other peoples

stuff... so we can't really moan when people do the same back.

(

rob, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:01, archived)

oh it's not a moan

as they say... imitation, sincerest, flattery and all that... Even if they *had* seen it. Which they didn't. I bet.

(

AndyK, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:07, archived)

It is me

That is why I haven't been here a few days.
I also played the theme tune for the Panda Pops advert, although this promo shot uses my siamese twin who got more of the body parts when we were separated:

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:00, archived)

now it makes sense.

(

rob, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:04, archived)

my crab attempt

an "it's monday morning" production.

crab-can-can

(

AndyK, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:20, archived)

It brought a smile to my face

on this cold monday morning.
Woo!

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:25, archived)

lovely

simply lovely.

(

rob, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:32, archived)

superb!

now can we have a computer game version?

(

spacefish bong!, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:49, archived)

how would that work?

you have to click in time to make him dance? else you die? horridly?

(

rob, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:57, archived)

Spacefish' mission of the day -

To make the aforementioned game version. Before 4pm please.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 5:00, archived)

bugger

i'm busy. maybe tomorrow, if my coding hat isn't worn out...

(

spacefish bong!, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 6:15, archived)

that really is a thing of beauty

thankyou, andy, for brighhtening up my day

(

crab_bloke), Mon 3 Dec 2001, 7:07, archived)

Can't that thing

go any faster?

(Ernest Thesiger, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 8:07, archived)

iM A BuG

iM a BuG Im A BUg iM a BuGiM a BuG Im A BUg

(bLONde_oN_The_EDge, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:07, archived)

bug

you are a bug...sorry..a BuG

(Rich-BRF, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:26, archived)

Your keyboard

has a big annoying bug.

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:28, archived)

spot the monday morning casualty

i get like that sometimes. now get out from under your desk and DO SOME WORK! (flash animations and photoshopping for preference, obviously. but real work too, in case your boss walks in).

(

spacefish bong!, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:52, archived)

PoLonY!!

OMg i WaS wALkiNg doWN tHE stREEt When ThiS CRazY STaRVEd mONkEy goES "wOAh, SLoW DOwn MAn" And i WAs aLl LiKE "WeLL WhY SHoULd i?" AnD HE wAs LikE "coZ OTHerWisE tHE PsyCHo DAnciNG WOMbAts WiLL eAT U" And i wAs Like "No shIT" Coz He LooKEd LiKE a DoORKnOB So THen I aTe A WAsHinG mACHiNE aND i WEEk LAtER i SAw A DoGhNUt

(bLONde_oN_The_EDge, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:02, archived)

and it was like,

weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!

(corruptia, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 16:02, archived)

I don't like mondays...

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 3:55, archived)

are you trying to torment the IX

(

rob, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 3:56, archived)

Me?

Never..

(

Wifey, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 3:58, archived)

Urine-masterrsleich meistenck!!

Vous mikta plou! Bwahaha

(Rich-BRF, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 2:27, archived)

the crab saves the day

by jumping on kitty's face, and psychically transmitting the urge to get on the motorway to kitty...evil kitty, bad kitty

(corruptia, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 18:44, archived)

kill

the evil A1(M)

(james, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:56, archived)

or is it

the Westway? oh no.

(james, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:57, archived)

It's the....uhhh...

::looks sheepish:: I don't know. It says the A193 to city centre and wallsend and the A167 for 'Other Routes'. Presumably less important ones.

(corruptia, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 9:29, archived)

Oh my God Oh my God Oh my God..

This was unexpected, but somehow, thorugh some miracle, I just made my first flash movie! I had to make it gif to upload it, but lookie lookie lookie!!

Kimbo's Gif

(Kimbo, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 17:20, archived)

Oh yeah..

The caption was supposed to be "she squeezed a little too hard" but I forgot in my excitement.

(Kimbo, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 17:22, archived)

Hmm.

geocities is being pissy. Go here then:

Geocities sucks

(Kimbo, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 17:48, archived)

Calm down, my lad.

It's lovely as it is!

Here are some other lovely things. Namely tigers.

(

spacefish bong!, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 19:05, archived)

Lovely Tigers.

"How true and how apt!"
Footnotes of 'Utopia',
speak to me,
oh god.

(Buster Hymen, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 19:17, archived)

Flash

whats the best way to start learning to use this?

(Giblet, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 15:24, archived)

try 3D Flash Animator

here. It's really simple. You just put things on a timeline and move them about on the scene. I love it.

(

spacefish bong!, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 15:34, archived)

flash

i started on macromedia and just ran the tutorials and its sooo easy

(rik, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 16:45, archived)

it looks a truly great toy...

and rather more sensibly priced...essentially flash for people who want to make silly cartoons and things, rather than sophisticated websites

(

automatton52 Grumpy old goth, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 3:51, archived)

namely

ME!!!

sensibly priced? it's free! (unless you have a conscience, which i don't.)

(

spacefish bong!, Mon 3 Dec 2001, 4:46, archived)

Turtles like to get their groove on.

(Fidel, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 15:12, archived)

Eat this

Real Love

(FoxA / DannyWeinkauf, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 15:05, archived)

yay!

woo!

(

spacefish bong!, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 15:09, archived)

Woo!

yey!

(Naughty Tortoise, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 15:36, archived)

DJ KrabStikz

(buttonpusher, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 14:08, archived)

cool

what is he mixing?

(

rob, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 14:24, archived)

Very nice,

crab m8. very realistic. could you please make me a model of a paraplegic to play with? it would be much appreciated.

(Giblet, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 15:11, archived)

whats he doooooing in there?

Aquatic groove.. a new spin off from all this chillout stuff around at the mo. Man. this crab can moonwalk sideways.

(buttonpusher, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 16:15, archived)

He Raaawks

Woo!

(

crab_bloke), Sun 2 Dec 2001, 16:24, archived)

Seafood fresh from the printer...

With b3ta I never have to go hungry again...

(Tomas Sparris Harris, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 13:29, archived)

is eating the b3ta crab the true path to ineffible wisdom?

Yes.

(

spacefish bong!, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 13:46, archived)

But...

..you turned me into a cannibal..

(Tomas Sparris Harris, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 14:39, archived)

so long as you don't eat red crabs

you're fine.

(

spacefish bong!, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 15:02, archived)

fantastic

that's so cool.

(

rob, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 13:56, archived)

fantastic

that's so cool.

(

rob, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 13:56, archived)

fantastic

that's so cool.

(

rob, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 13:56, archived)

so cool

that i've said it thrice.

(

rob, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 13:56, archived)

fantastic

(

spacefish bong!, Sun 2 Dec 2001, 14:00, archived)

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