Ignoring his terrible decision-making skills, he also appears to have a creative approach to the language, and seemingly wants a job so badly he can't be arsed to write a CV.
In short he's the ideal candidate. Can't imagine why he's not been snapped up yet.
(evil_andyStick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:21,
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The publicity generated 45 offers
which he turned down.
Is the solutuion not just a beard?
(monkeonschmonkeon, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:21,
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That is dangerously close to being quite a sensible suggestion.
(pineapplecharmD d M Y, H:i, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:46,
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But a beard would cover his epic tattoo, yo!
(BrokenCoccyxdoesn't mind if you grope on, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 14:57,
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There's a far simpler solution than that.
He should just become Arseface.
(stuj(^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 14 Jul 2017, 14:02,
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shame he can't grow a beard...
(Ya WhatSkiddlyboop, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:21,
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or wear a surgical mask.
(trombonercherophobia is my kind of fun, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 18:28,
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Strange, you'd think his having only just finished two years for aggravated robbery would have employers beating down his door
(HappyToastGroat froth, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:22,
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all those words but in the other order
with him beating down doors etc etc
(Ya WhatSkiddlyboop, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:24,
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I realise it has legal meaning
but I love the idea of it being a different crime just because you were all wound up at the time, presumably by your flatmate not doing the washing up or something.
"FUCK YOU Terrence. I swear, if you leave that FUCKING coffee mug in the sink one more time I'm going to rob a post office or something."
(pineapplecharmD d M Y, H:i, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:48,
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What a family
The tattoo was done by his cell mate who was also his brother AND “The best was when my mum put a comment on it. She just said ‘proud of you son’"
(DinivanXHas stinging piss after drinking Pact Coffee, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:26,
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haha!
proper scum bags then.
(Firkinfeduplast shat on your wife's tits at, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 14:13,
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did he lose a drinking game at the b3ta London-bash?
(Woodkovsky☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:28,
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Isn't drinking the game?
I always thought the drinking itself was the drinking game.
(My Namewas saying these words inside your head on, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 16:54,
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My friend used to play a drinking game called "next" Grab a beer, drink it as fast as you can, shout "next", and repeat. Works well.
(Turquoise Hexagon Sunhas just dropped acid on, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 18:18,
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he should be put to death
before he has a chance to reproduce. if he hasn't already
(L E T S G O"Stop buying into and spreading this shit", Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:39,
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It's ok, his daughter is the care of social services.
(PrufrockLucifer, son of the morning!, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 13:46,
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And you all claim eugenics and forcible sterilization and euthanasia are BAD THINGS.
(stuj(^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Fri 14 Jul 2017, 14:05,
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I have never claimed that.
(eViLegionChief Commissioner of the Scottish Lunacy Board, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 14:21,
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I don't
I think everyone should be sterilized. The whole bloody lot of us.
(Huw Edwards#notalljews, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 14:21,
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You first
(evil_andyStick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 14:43,
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I'm booked in for the snip on the 25th of August!
So there!
(Huw Edwards#notalljews, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 15:13,
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Don´t expect to do any walking for the week after that.
It´s alright just after the op, but when the anesthetic wears off, be prepared for a whole new meaning of pain.
(Tuskknows where you live, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 15:47,
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I'm having a no-scalpel procedure.
I was told that I should expect a couple of days of discomfort, but I've got a rather high pain threshold developed through a decade of avoiding the dentist and putting up with some pretty severe abscesses and cavities in my twenties, so I'm optimistic :)
(Huw Edwards#notalljews, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 16:03,
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Something something something your username.
(Extinct Jesus Dossier"...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Fri 14 Jul 2017, 16:20,
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Dunno about that particular procedure, but to me, it felt like someone was squeezing my testicles
and not in a pleasant way. Hard. For about a week.
Still worth it, though.
(Tuskknows where you live, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 16:36,
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my friend became very boring after the snip.
about a year after, his wife left him. just stopped loving him. what no one talks about is the effect it has on your testosterone levels.
good luck
(L E T S G O"Stop buying into and spreading this shit", Fri 14 Jul 2017, 16:31,
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Basically the same reason we did it to the bunnies
They're two boys, so there was no danger of baby bunnies, but they are so much calmer afterwards.
(evil_andyStick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 17:25,
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I think your confusing vasectomy and bollockectomy.
As long as my doctor doesn't, I'm sure I'll be fine. I have almost complete faith in the NHS!
(Huw Edwards#notalljews, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 17:43,
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To the tune of Yesterday
Suddenly, I'm not half the man I used to be. I had a National Health vasectomy...
no mr penis i am not.
you don't make as much sperm after a while and your testosterone level goes through the floor.
(L E T S G O"Stop buying into and spreading this shit", Fri 14 Jul 2017, 22:35,
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I fear that might be all in your pal's head ;)
(Huw Edwards#notalljews, Sat 15 Jul 2017, 1:00,
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well you could test it for yourself
ask for a hormone level blood test. and again in 6 months. then cry into a pillow
(L E T S G O"Stop buying into and spreading this shit", Sat 15 Jul 2017, 9:20,
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Nonsense, simply doesn't work like than.
(FeralCatManUnusual disease collector., Sat 15 Jul 2017, 3:31,
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The doctors say that it should not happen like that.
One friend in particular did it because the missus did not want the pill anymor thusly a prerequisite for tuneel O love time, so he did, and she now complains he does not want her. You could rub sweaty pussy in his face and he'd be "I'd rather watch a rerun of that auction show on the BBC". But he did become much better at his boring office job, concentration and all that.
Other friends who got the prostate zapped are still horny as ever...
(smellysamlyingcableSeaman on, Sat 15 Jul 2017, 17:59,
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Very creative
With ears as near-enough question marks it's a Spanish question.
And an umlaut on the A.
(roysin, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 14:19,
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I feel the need to colour in the letters.
(FeralCatManUnusual disease collector., Fri 14 Jul 2017, 15:01,
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and he's got tiny ears
never trust a man with tiny ears when his eyesight goes he won't be able to wear glasses.
(insignificantsnivellinglittleturdI Like Peas, Fri 14 Jul 2017, 15:50,
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