stupid allergies
i've never been able to have a cat or a dog as most of them make me sneeze too much.

it always amuses me when cat/dog owners try to say that their cat/dog farts. surely cats and dogs don't really do this? it must just be the owner blaming their own disgusting flatulence on an innocent dumb animal. how cruel.

last time i was home, i thought our budgie (captain beaky) would like to sit with me in the study whilst i was working. suddenly realising it had been very quiet for a while, i wondered where it had gone. it had stuffed itself into a gap on the bookshelf and was busily chewing away at the erect cock of a horrid little naked statue that my dad or brother or someone was once given by some secretaries at work.

talk about hours of pecking pleasure (well, ok, normal people don't, but manufacturers of budgie toys do).

the statue is now in the bin, which is where it should have gone years ago.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 11:56, 20 replies)

Cats and Dogs
Do fart...just not with the general ripping noises...a cat fart tends to be more of a "poooooofffff" and a self-satisfied smirk on their furry face.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 12:00, closed)

Yep... my cat farts
And since it's only me and him in the house, there'd be no point in my trying to deflect the blame. It really is him.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 12:05, closed)

Cat WMDs
I would say more of a 'phhissssst' followed by a look of indignation as the furry farter clearly blames you and will look accusingly at you, especially if in polite company.

If you're really out of luck, 'phhissssplutsplutsplut' followed by a discreet departure.

God I love pets. So do the manufacturers of kitchen roll...
(osok Rebel without a clue, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 12:05, closed)

As above
Cats do indeed fart. And the smell is disproportionately pungent for their small size.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 12:07, closed)

Yep
Cats fart. Even the fluffeh cute ones.

Ex-Mrs PJM and I had Leonard and a big, black fluffy cat woefully christened "Jasmine". Jasmine was gorgeous, but toxic. She'd sit on the lino in the kitchen getting excited as breakfast was served and you could hear an audible high pitched squeak from her hind quarters.

Depends on what you feed 'em on. Iams cat food seems to be the least explosive, however some kitty food makes for the most pungent guff fuel.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 12 Dec 2007, 12:15, closed)

dog fart
I have a dalmatian of which the breed are known to be bad farters. I kid you not when I say 60% of the times that she sits down she lets one rip. Not just pffffttt but full blown rippers. The funniest thing though is when it makes her jump up and look at her posterior as if to say 'where did that come from?'
(Studentken is looking for motivation on, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 12:23, closed)

Farty dogs and girlfriends
A while back I was seeing a girl who was somewhat vocal in the rectal voicebox department. As was her housemate and her housemate's dog.

Sitting there amongst the three of them quacking away like a duck pond was a traumatic business.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 12 Dec 2007, 12:28, closed)

dogs do indeed let rip
and in my experience the smell is possibly the most evil thing ever
(tinypod will never learn. Ever., Wed 12 Dec 2007, 13:03, closed)

?
why wouldn't they fart?
(phe, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 13:19, closed)

Fish fart too
but I think that's something to do with buoyancy.

Actually, I think the most disturbing thing about rachelswipe's story is the fact that her dad had a statue with an erect cock in his study! Even if it was a gift.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 13:29, closed)

i don't know
i just assume that it's a very human thing to do. i mean, they don't talk, do they?! i guess because i've never had one, i've never known one do it.

eventually i will get me an irish terrier, as i am not allergic to those, and then i'll find out the truth.

the erect cocks - sadly there's a mini army of such "ornaments". they're brass or wooden (there's one that hilariously pops out if you lift the barrel covering it and so on). it was a bit of an injoke with my dad's secretary from years ago and the staff always bought them for him. then my brother told his secretary and she did it too. they are hideous but hidden away on a top shelf, so normally they don't disturb anyone.

except poor thick captain beaky.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 14:21, closed)

Farts are the expulsion of gases
that build up as a by-product of the digestion process.

Anything that eats, farts.
( chenobble rocking his explorer beard on, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 14:36, closed)

Everything that eats, farts
...except for rachelswipe.

And me of course.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 12 Dec 2007, 14:46, closed)

I've made a dog think that it's farted...
Staying at my Girlfriend's parents house, feet up on a pouffe, dog curled up in between my legs.

And so it came to pass that a day of delicious food and fine beer came a'calling, and when everyone was out of the room I let a ripper go.

Immediately, the dog was on her feet, sniffing her backside. She looked at me as if to say "you know, I'm sure I just farted, and yet... I'm not sure!"

5 minutes later, I did it again... The look of sheer confusion on her face will never leave me!

(Oh, and *click*!)
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 16:17, closed)

Studentken
My St. Bernard is exactly the same way - frequent, loud (maybe half as loud as myself, but the same type of sound), and coinciding with her changing from a standing position to a sitting one! However, my Alaskan Malamute's are always silent, or just a gentle "whoosh" noise, and generally occur when he's asleep.
(chase, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 16:39, closed)

Not everything that eats farts
Kangeroos don't fart. Something to do with the type of bacteria in their guts.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 17:01, closed)

You need to come round and smell my Arwen.
She's been a farter since she's been a kitten.


They're deadly.
( Rev. Cleo still alive, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 17:07, closed)

cats use their farts strategically
Eg: You have been out all evening. You come in late, and the cat makes "Oh, you're back! I've missed you so much!" noises and cute fluffeh nuzzling actions, but then farts and runs away to Under the Table and Looks At You as if to say "See. Go out and you will be Punished. Mwa hahahaha" etc etc.
(happylittletulip helpless and delicious, Wed 12 Dec 2007, 17:11, closed)

Cats definitely do fart, often audibly.
They burp too, though it's not a human 'braaap' noise; they just jolt and grunt, then the room fills with the smell of stale cat-food breath.
( Bob Todd whee, Thu 13 Dec 2007, 0:20, closed)

I wish cats didn't fart.
You're more than welcome to spend the evening with our littlest cat, Tristan, after he's managed to get into anything containing dairy! At first, I thought it was my husband blaming the cat. Now I know better.

It's vile. And it lingers. And for whatever reason, he seems to be compelled to sit on or near someone right before he starts a session.
(louveciennes , Volvospotter, Thu 13 Dec 2007, 5:00, closed)