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This is a question Fears and Phobias

I'll level with you. I'm really freaked out by loose buttons. I'm fine while they're doing their job, but once they're free the evil bastards are a major threat to my life. Tell us what spooks you, and how you cope. Also: church bells, doner kebab salads, death.

(, Thu 11 Sep 2014, 17:18)
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[sigh]
(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 10:26, 11 replies)
I can see his bawbag

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 10:35, closed)
Do you have a massive stock photo library of these things
that you trot out whenever you feel the moment requires it?
(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 11:23, closed)
Yes.
I call it 'the internet'.
(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 11:26, closed)
I don't think you and I have the same bookmarks.

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 11:32, closed)
Is that Bea Arthur?

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 11:38, closed)
This is libellous and I demand it be taken down.

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 12:17, closed)
This is pretty grim pal, I know you're used to far worse sights in the badger bedroom but still.

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 12:27, closed)
This could be a good way of finding out how frequently the mods actually look at the site
My guess is that this image will probably stay up until 2073 or so at the current rate.
(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 15:20, closed)
and yet ... if I post noelspin it's straight to the naughty step

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 16:22, closed)
Can someone ban
this stupid little cunt?

Which part of don't post NSFW images is it you're struggling to understand, you fucking cretin?
(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 15:45, closed)
^browsing b3ta rather than working

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 15:48, closed)
This is the funniest thing I've read all day.

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 16:21, closed)

That doesn't actually surprise me.

I bet the farting noises from in the night garden are a very close second though.
(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:55, closed)
Oh come on, a man who doesn't laugh at a good old fashioned internet tantrum is...
....well, probably you. Or Carpe Cydney.
(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 15:29, closed)
It's not a tantrum.
It's simply asking that you are removed from here, as you contribute nothing, and have been at least partially responsible for turning it into somewhere nobody wants to post.

Do you not see that posting gay porn pictures here is stupid? People do read this at work, it's a text board, we should be able to do that.

You really need to grow up. I find it difficult to believe that your obnoxious online persona is completely different to your real life one, so I'm quite confident you'd actually benefit from learning not to be a dickhead.

You've been doing this for years now, do you think it's still funny or something? Are you posting this stuff because nobody is paying attention any more?

Don't imagine you're actually bothering me though, I can keep this up for as long as you can. Only difference is I can walk away any time I like - you have to post here constantly because it's all you have.

lol.
(, Tue 23 Sep 2014, 10:10, closed)
^upset on the Internet.
Saving you the trouble.
(, Tue 23 Sep 2014, 10:52, closed)
^says 'you're not upsetting me' whilst posting a second 'this is why you're a terrible bastard' post.

(, Tue 23 Sep 2014, 18:04, closed)
Let's be honest.
While you're rubbing your hands together and cackling with glee at how upset I am, what is actually happening is I'm complaining about you posting gay porn pictures on a text board I'm looking at at work.

This won't get me fired. It won't get me into any trouble at all.

It will offend people walking past my desk though, and that's not something I'd choose to happen.

But this isn't really a big deal - I don't need to be looking at this board at all, so it's not like you're having any effect. I solve the problem by simply not going to b3ta.

Does that make you happy? If so, well done. You are indeed a powerful internet warrior, you have possibly forced me to not look at b3ta very often. If it wasn't for the fact this is probably the biggest thing you'll achieve this year, I might be tempted to think you're not a dickhead.

Hope this helps!
(, Wed 24 Sep 2014, 9:31, closed)
It's been up for 5 days
thought it would've been moderated by now.
(, Wed 24 Sep 2014, 12:10, closed)
Yup.
Doesn't mean it should be there though.
(, Wed 24 Sep 2014, 12:40, closed)
Well
AB won't be deleting it anytime soon.
I agree that it's NSFW, but the last time a mod was here was probably issuing the image challenge vote.
This morning.

They've given up, haven't they?
(, Wed 24 Sep 2014, 14:15, closed)
I'd have thought if they saw it, they'd zap it,
but I might be wrong. It's the kind of thing that would normally have been at least modded to a link.

I adblocked it the first time I saw it, as I do with all the stupid shit the puppies try and shock us with.
(, Thu 25 Sep 2014, 9:08, closed)
gay porn doesn't usually involve two people of different genders
you virgin
(, Wed 24 Sep 2014, 12:26, closed)
I think you're in breach of your employer's internet usage policy.

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 17:08, closed)
^^^^

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 18:18, closed)
Quick, grass him up to his employer!

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 21:19, closed)

I'm reading that and hearing a Mr Bean voice.
(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:53, closed)
Q. What is a good indicator that you should call it a day and commit suicide?
A. When you become incensed by an illustration.
(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 23:44, closed)
But what about anthropomorphic, sexualised, underage female rabbit illustrations.

(, Sat 20 Sep 2014, 12:55, closed)
I thought I couldn't manage another wank today. ...
I was wrong.
(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 16:19, closed)
That doesn't look right.
I thought I couldn't manage another wank today. ... I was wrong.
That's better.
(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 16:24, closed)
Where did you get my mum's picture?
And the other one looks like one of my mates.
(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 17:08, closed)
The guy laying down is in fact Cris Rowan from Zonein, Ca

(, Fri 19 Sep 2014, 19:09, closed)
This image has now been up for over 24 hours folks.

(, Sat 20 Sep 2014, 21:00, closed)
Nearly 48 now.

(, Sun 21 Sep 2014, 20:51, closed)
60 hours.

(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 10:31, closed)
Interesting
Must count quite high up the list of your life's achievements?
(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 12:43, closed)
It's more a minimalist commentary on how much of a shit the site moderators give about this particular corner.
ACTUALLY.
(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 15:44, closed)
I do apologise, badger
The nuance of your commentary was lost to me amidst the titilating mental images produced by the granny with a strap-on
(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 17:06, closed)
wait
there are other corners of the site they actually give a shit about? And I'm not falling for "the newsletter".
(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 17:14, closed)
Well, you try pointing out to HappyToast that there's kiddie porn on /board and see him rush to the defence of it..

(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 17:51, closed)
Is it just me that thinks Happy Toast
and his 5 million quids worth of rendering station is what turned B3ta from an anarchic quirky timewaste into a deeply earnest competition?

I used to post quite a lot of photoshops, but it all got kind of pointless and unrewarding.

I gotta stop living in the past, man.
(, Tue 23 Sep 2014, 10:57, closed)
HappyToast basically turned/board into a nonce's paradise.

(, Tue 23 Sep 2014, 18:03, closed)

jokes are better than technique or sutin
(, Tue 23 Sep 2014, 19:11, closed)
nice to see scaryduck is paying attention to the important stuff

(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 16:40, closed)
3 days now, give or take a few minutes,

(, Mon 22 Sep 2014, 22:13, closed)
i might post a version with a spinning noel head

(, Tue 23 Sep 2014, 8:00, closed)
YES!

(, Tue 23 Sep 2014, 14:02, closed)

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