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This is a question Fears and Phobias

I'll level with you. I'm really freaked out by loose buttons. I'm fine while they're doing their job, but once they're free the evil bastards are a major threat to my life. Tell us what spooks you, and how you cope. Also: church bells, doner kebab salads, death.

(, Thu 11 Sep 2014, 17:18)
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This question is now closed.

I'm terrified of regular newsletters.
Fortunately, it doesn't seem much of a problem at the moment.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 17:24, 6 replies)
Uncontrolled vaginal bleeding
Guys fix things. That's what they do. But there's no fix for that. Bandages don't work, tourniquets don't work, and suggesting styptic pencils is just awkward. A person could bleed to death. Anxiety. Got hives just from the intractability of the problem.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 17:21, 4 replies)
wants to rule the World.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 15:37, 2 replies)
people with cheap shoes

(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 15:23, 4 replies)
Fuck Everything And Run.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 15:18, 3 replies)
I must not fear.

Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 15:16, 10 replies)
Our deepest fear
...is not that we are inadequate.

Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. Your playing small does not serve the world.
There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do.

It's not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own lights shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others

- Marianne Williamson, as misquoted (arguably improved) in 'Coach Carter'
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 15:08, 6 replies)
Unfortunate fear of heights
I have a fairly reasonable, though strong reaction to heights that involves my hands becoming slick faster than a nun's cunt on her day off. This is rather frustrating when I'm out climbing and I end up dipping my hands in the chalk bag as often as I do in the nun's cunt.

I sweat at the mere thought of climbing, but it's bloody good fun.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 15:03, Reply)
Jack the Ripper
More specifically, when I'm closing the curtains and it's pitch black outside I'm scared that Jack the Ripper will pop up out of the darkness.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 14:54, 5 replies)
I've got over it now, but
I used to have a fear of losing car keys, to the extent that I would check I had them while driving the car. I would turn the key in the ignition while driving down the road, which is not a very good idea. I don't do this any more, but I still tap my pockets excessively whenever I'm out. My darling wife is the opposite - she appears completely uncaring about where the car keys are. This means that if we're going out and she was the last one with the keys then we'll most likely be late leaving as the car keys will be in a coat pocket, placed randomly on any available flat surface in the house, pr even once, memorably, in the washing machine on a 40 degree wash.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 14:50, 3 replies)
I'm afraid of dying abandoned and alone

(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 14:32, 4 replies)
I don't like silence.

(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 14:24, 2 replies)
I have a slight fear of man made heights
natural ones are fine, I just don't trust us humans to build high stuff.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 13:58, Reply)
i'm scared of being alone

(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 13:56, 2 replies)
I had a mate who was afraid of getting sausaged
but we managed to cure that by tying him naked to a lamp post in soho
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 13:43, 2 replies)
I'm developing a fear of HEIGHTS!?! wtf is that about?!?!
Where did I discover this? At the top of the Big Wheel at LightWater Valley while sat next to my 6 year old. He loved it, kept moving from side to side "ooo look at that Dad!" as the basket gently swayed. The noises of the bolts grinding above my head sounded like they were screaming under the immense pressure and sheer force of my Son and me and were about to fail and explode like a 1000lb cluster bomb, showering us with debris before depositing us into the lake below after being rammed by the miniature train.

I sat rigid, feet hurting (again wtf??!) gripping to the cage-like-doors with white knuckles, unable to turn my head or look anywhere but the horizon waiting for the sheer nightmare to end.

It was a physical reaction, pure terror - why? I used to love heights, nowts changed, why is it developing in later life?

[/Unfunny Story]
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 13:26, 11 replies)

My daughter has an irrational fear of Mayonnaise. I am entirely responsible for this. She is now 16 and head lice happened when she was 5. I read an effective way of getting rid of these critters was lashings of mayonnaise, beer, vinegar and mouth rinse applied to the head then wrapped up. I duly did this,leaving her to sleep with the afore mentioned on her head. At 3 o'clock in the morning she wandered into my room. 'Mummy, I don't like mayonnaise'. She looked positively yellow in the half light so I panicked and got the stuff of her head. Also, I tried to give her fish oil by mixing it with mayonnaise in a seperate incident. That may have helped with the phobia.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 13:24, 11 replies)
The insinkerator

(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 13:20, Reply)
Pointy objects
Single pointy objects make me uncomfortable. They have to be long and thin - spear like.

Collections of pointy objects are worse. The battle scenes in Lord of the Rings - I can't watch them. Too many pointy objects.

Just thinking about it now makes me feel like I've got fine grit behind my eyeballs.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 13:18, Reply)
Smoked bacon.

(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 12:53, 3 replies)
Not having my feet covered up in bed
The rest of doesn't have to be covered up, just as long as my feet are. In case all skeletons get me during the night.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 12:38, 4 replies)
I'm terrified of people thinking I might not be incredibly wealthy and happy.

(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 12:19, 7 replies)
A good place to discover that you're claustrophobic

... is definitely NOT half way into a potholing trip.

I'd happily joined up, it was something I'd always thought I'd like to try. We got kitted up, started our descent, no problems. Then, suddenly, it all went wrong, and The Fear hit me - real primal, animal terror. Not intellectual "Shit, this is a bit dangerous" kind of fear, but deep, limbic horror that can't easily be put into words.

Apparently, I smashed the record time for exiting the cave...
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 11:55, 2 replies)
It's not so much spiders I have a problem with, although they're scuttly fuckers and I'm not too keen on them, but
their webs. Ach. Erg. Hate them.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 11:52, 2 replies)
He's gonna hate me for posting this...
Mate at work, on the Ambos, has a proper, full blown phobia of banana skins. Bananas are fine when zipped up, it's just the skins.
Anyway, long story, short.
He's working on an Ambo with a couple of female paramedics (it's called third-manning; don't ask), when one of them drops a banana skin on the floor between the front seats, intending to dispose of it later. He's driving & visibly flinches, so she asks why? Like an idiot, he tells the two lasses about his phobia.
Fast forward to later in the shift. They're in a large care home & he's sent back to the truck to fetch the stretcher. After a while, when there's still no sign of him, one of the lasses says she'd better go look for him. The care home manager tells her they can look on the cctv, because they have a camera on the front door. Switching it on they are greeted by the sight of him just as he discovers the banana skin, tucked into his jacket pocket.
I think the phrase was "dancing like an epileptic apache"
Sadly no video recorder was attached to the cctv.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 10:15, 27 replies)
Chewing cotton wool.

(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:52, 5 replies)
I've got the unexplainable terror of counting in German.
The doctor diagnosed it as 'Eins Zwei Drei Fear'.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:34, 11 replies)
I would write about 10,000 words on my fear of breakfast in bed but I won't.
Breakfast in bed is just plain fucking wrong.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 9:15, 26 replies)
I have had general anaesthetic many times in my life.
I have a tremendous fear of waking up while the operation is still going on, but being unable to move or cry out. Three times I have been anaesthetised AND had paralysing agents pumped in to me so I couldn't move during surgery.
The idea that I could have been awake and unable to scream while they hacked at my spine is giving me cold sweats even now.
(, Fri 12 Sep 2014, 8:05, 9 replies)

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